This fic is set within Hells Bells at the wedding when Buffy and Spike have
their little conversation. I was inspired to write it the first time I saw
Hells Bells, during this convo. I just thought Spike looked so lonely and
so defeated and he was being so sweet about it I just wanted to hug him or
her to hug him and make everything alright so I translated my feelings into
Buffy and hence you now have a Fluffy ending for Hells Bells.
Most of the guests had taken their seats, waiting for the ceremony to begin. Buffy's eyes darted around the room, searching for any signs of more trouble, with Mr Harris calmed down it was less likely, but it would still pay to keep her eyes open.
Walking toward the front entrance where she could have a better view the she suddenly saw Spike standing against the wall, looking across the room. She paused, what was she supposed to do? Did she carry on like she hadn't seen him? Did she talk to him? What was he going to do?
As she stared at him, his head turned toward her. Their eyes locked and they stared at each other, Spike being the first to reluctantly tear his gaze away, began studying his shoes as he scuffed one toe across the ground.
Buffy sighed; she couldn't leave things like this. As much as she would like to just walk past him and go on with her life and he with his, she couldn't leave things like this. There was just too much pain.
His was obvious to her, his whole stance screamed misery of his unlife and discomfort with his surroundings; and as much as she wished it didn't - it had hurt her to leave him, his kicked puppy gaze had almost broken her heart, and it hurt just as much to see him standing there.
Steeling herself against whatever was about to happen, she moved across the remaining space toward him.
Spike shifted slightly as she got closer, he knew she was coming over to him. But for what? To taunt him? To throw him out? To pretend that nothing happened? He knew that somehow the latter would kill him. He braced himself.
*Act cool, nothing happened, its just the slayer coming to say Hi.*
'Hello, Buffy.' He glanced up at her hesitantly, almost shyly.
She smiled awkwardly, but sweetly, and his heart melted at the sight of it. 'Hey.'
He paused, now what? 'It's a happy occasion.'
She nodded slightly.
*What the bleedin' hell are you thinking, you ponce? It's a happy occasion? Show her you don't care.*
'You meet my friend?'
Buffy tried not to smile at his obviously fake change in demeanour. His cocky smirk was back, but his eyes were sad.
'No,' she replied. 'Not yet,'
She paused. 'But she seems like a very.nice attempt at making me jealous.
Buffy mentally winced. *A nice attempt at making me jealous? Well there's a good way to get yourself into a conversation that you don't want to be having ever, especially near your friends. Also, very lame call. Note to self: open your mouth as little as possible from here on.*
Spike didn't seemed fazed and smiled, a small self-mocking smile. 'Is it working?'
Buffy paused. How the hell was she supposed to answer that? She was jealous, not madly jealous since the fact that he only brought the skank to do so was quite obvious. If he had brought someone else.someone more permanent looking, then she was sure the jealousy would have flared up major league.
*But we won't go there will we Buffy? No feelings for the soulless dead creature. Only pity.*
'A little.' He didn't respond. 'It doesn't change anything.but if you're wildly curious, yeah, it hurts.'
*What?!?!?! Buffy, get a grip. You are jealous that he isn't fawning over you anymore. You're ego has been dented, that's all. You do not feel hurt! And.even if you did, which you don't.you do not go around admitting it to Spike.*
Spike looked devastated for a moment. 'I'm sorry.'
Buffy marvelled that he could care so much, forgetting his own legitimate pain for her pathetic pain.
She smothered a small grin as he caught himself. Closing his eyes, briefly and shaking his head in that way she found so cute.
*Cute!?!?! The wedding is getting to you. Spike is not cute. He is a monster. An evil killing monster who destroys cuteness.*
'Or.Good.' He leaned in for emphasis and she couldn't suppress the smile this time. He was so sw.
*Not sweet. Not cute, not adorable.not gorgeous not anything that he looks like in that shirt.*
She liked that shirt on him. It wasn't his typical Bad Ass look, maybe it was the absence of the red, but he still looked good. Dark colours did suit him. Spike looked at her, sensing her awkwardness. 'You want us to go?'
'No. No, I ... you have every right to be here. I pretty much deserve-'
Buffy's fought the impulse not to sigh as he looked at her in that serious, intense way that made her spine tingle. Made her feel loved. 'That's not true, you.'
He caught himself and sighed. Glancing at the ceiling in frustration he muttered.
'God, this is hard.'
'Yeah.'
Spike sighed again. This was never going to work. 'I think we'll go.'
'Go where? To your place?' Buffy almost smacked herself in the face. *God, sound like a jealous ex much?*
Although.technically that was what she was. *Do not go there, Buffy.*
'Yeah,' Spike sounded slightly defensive. ' I suppose.'
He began juggling on the balls of his feet, another little quirk that Buffy lo.AHEM.liked about him. In an evil undead liking way.
'That was the idea.'
Buffy nodded, looking slightly humiliated.
'Evil.' Spike gestured to emphasise his point, clearing a tiny bit of the tension as Buffy acquiesced.
'Of course.'
Spike felt like he had been caught about to put his hand in the cookie jar. 'But I wont.'
Then he again remembered his Bad Ass image. 'Or I will.'
What was the point in pretending? It was Buffy. She could read him like a book anyway. *Bugger, but this was frustrating.*
'I'll just go. Give 'em my best or whatever. The happy couple.'
Buffy nodded, understanding. 'I will.'
Spike glanced at her again. His face softened as he took in her face, trying to commit this happy moment of hers to memory.he didn't know if he would see it again.
Buffy's heart softened under his gaze. How was it that he could make her feel so loved and needed in just a glance.where as her friends.
'It's nice to watch you be happy. For them, even. I don't see it a lot. You, uh... you glow.'
*Glow?!?!?! You soddin poof. You bleedin Peaches wannabe.*
Buffy smiled. 'That's because the dress is radioactive.'
Spike chuckled, and Buffy joined him. *The wackiness of the Scoobies*
Buffy looked up at him, the moment fading.
He looked down at her. 'I should, we should.'
She smiled. 'Yeah.'
They stood there for a minute, just staring.
Spike nodded to her and began to move away.
Buffy's heart started pounding as she watched him search for the girl he brought.
What was she doing? She was letting him go, she was letting him.wait. Why did it matter? It was Spike.evil dead. Who cares that he made her feel so alive.so loved. If she went back she would just be using him again.for that feeling of being needed.
Or would she?
Something was different. Her heart felt like it was breaking as she watched him grab the skank's arm and begin to drag her out.
As the couple reached the door, Spike turned and looked at her. His faced marred with confusion as he saw her watching him.a look on her face.what was it?
But she lowered her eyes and he sighed, dragging the girl out the door and into the dismal rain. At least the rain would immediately extinguish any flames caused by the dim sunlight.
Buffy glanced back up as he left, and before she could even contemplate her actions she had run out of the door after him, calling his name.
Spike heard his name and turned abruptly to find Buffy chasing down the road after him.
'Slayer?'
The girl on his arm turned to him, confused and annoyed. 'This is the slayer? You took me to wedding with the Slayer in attendance? What's the slayer doing at a demon wedding anyway?'
'Shut it.' Spike looked at Buffy who had come to stop in front of him, her eyes darting around in nervousness.
'Is everything alright? Baddies you need help with?'
'You help the Slayer?'
'I said shut up. She pays me, alright.'
'I, er that is.um.well.'
Spike was getting annoyed. *Stupid bints, never say what they mean, unless they are breaking your heart.*
'Spit it out, Slayer.' His tone came out much harsher than he meant it to, and he winced.
She glanced up at him. Anger clouded her eyes, followed by something he couldn't pick.
'Nothing, sorry to bother you.'
She turned away and walked back up the street, her head bowed tears fighting to finally run unchecked down her face.
Spike resisted the impulse to run after her, but paused as he was about to turn when is vamp ears caught a sniffle and his nose smelt salt.
The goth tugged on his arm, bringing him back to the present.
'Are you coming?' She whined and with a last pondering glance at the blonde figure he took her hand and walked off down the street.
****************
Buffy entered the room to see Xander who had just reappeared from somewhere out the back.
Buffy raised her eyebrows at him and he looked at her sheepishly, mouthing the words "couldn't find the ring".
Buffy smiled and shook her head and he looked at her in concern. He looked down at the old man who was tugging on his arm.
'Can't it wait. I'm kinda busy here.'
He moved over to Buffy. 'That weird guy has been following me everywhere, and I can't figure out who he is. Will's is checking to see if Anya knows him, cuz he is grating on my nerves and I wanna kick him out, but not if they are like close friends or something.'
He looked down at her.
'Are you ok? You look kinda, sad and teary.'
Buffy smiled as she dashed away the remaining tears. Just emotional. My little Xander is all grown up.'
Xander chuckled. 'Yep, that's me. Who'd have thought "can't get a date, Xander" would be the first to tie the knot?'
Buffy was about to reply when Willow walked up. 'Anya doesn't know who he is, so I got D'Hoffren to get one of his minions to throw the guy out.'
Buffy raised her eyebrows. 'You on speaking terms with D'Hoffren?'
Willow nodded and shifted her feet. 'You remember.after Oz left. My will be done.'
Buffy and Xander nodded.
'Lets not go there.' Willow nodded in agreement with Xnader, but Buffy hung her head.
They had been happy. That was the one time when she and Spike had been happy.
The musical tinkling of the piano brought them out of their reverie and Xander began to look terrified.
'Here we go.' They moved to take their places, Xander at the front of the room and Willow and Buffy ran to find Anya.
*******************
The service was over, not a moment to soon in Buffy's opinion. She had spent the entire service moving from row to row stopping fights, instead of taking her place dutifully at Anya's side.
It was hard to hear anything of the ceremony, the scuffles that had broken out between Demon and Human had drowned out Anya's quiet and Xander's shy voice.
Now she, like all the other bridesmaids except Halfrek, had changed from the awkward radioactive bridesmaids dresses into more comfortable clothes.
She was currently the only person sitting at the Bride and Grooms table. Everyone else was on the dance floor. Buffy smiled as she watched them dance.
Xander and Anya were still dancing together, for what was the tenth song. Anya had refused to let anyone cut in and Willow had been getting slightly annoyed, wanting to dance with Xander.
At the moment Willow was dancing with Tara, both being careful not to get to close, but trying to get as close as possible without seeming obvious; each shooting the other tiny glances and blushing when their eyes met.
Dawn was dancing with a young looking Demon boy, who Buffy was keeping a close eye on.
Suddenly the song ended and a new one came on. With a wry smile Buffy realised that it was 'Wind Beneath My Wings.'
Lots of eye rolling came from the crowd but all the couples moved together as the slow dance began.
Buffy, looked around the room. The only people other than her who weren't dancing were the members of the Harris family who had passed out under tables and on chairs and the Demons who looked like anything more complex than walking would tangle their tentacles.
The song grew louder and tears came to Buffy's eyes. They all looked so happy, all her friends and she was stuck by herself listening ti the song she had wanted to play at her wedding with Spike.
She reached for her glass of Champagne to find it empty. Looking around she saw a bottle of Bourbon at one of the Harris tables where all occupants were currently snoring.
She pushed herself up from the table she darted around the edge of the room to get the bottle and ran back again, hoping no one had seen her. None of the dancers appeared to have even looked up and she sank into the chair in relief, never noticing the figure at the door watched her as she lifted the bottle to her lips and drank down several mouthfuls before gasping and slamming the bottle onto the table.
Buffy lifted the bottle to her lips for a third time, ready to relish the burning pain of the liquid sliding down her throat to find that the bottle she had snatched hadn't been that full and was now empty.
'Fuck!'
She leaned forward and buried her head in her arms, the tears starting again. Why did she feel like this? Auuuurggghhhhh! Why was it so painful.
A cold touch on her arm caused her to raise her head and find a flask being held out to her. She took it gratefully, not even considering who was holding it, and took a few long gulps.
'Why?' She moaned at the ceiling, forgetting the other persons presence.
'Why can't I be normal? Why can't I love normal human's like everyone else on the planet.
'The whelp doesn't love a human.'
Buffy jumped and whirled to face the person sitting in the chair beside her.
'Anya is human.' Buffy picked up the flask and took another sip.
'God, this stuff tastes just as bad as it always did.'
Spike chuckled.
's'not funny.'
'Course not, luv. Now, you mind telling me why you aren't dancing? S' is our song after all.'
Buffy chuckled darkly. 'No one to dance with, no reason to dance.'
'Come on, luv, there's lots of slimy things who'd love to dance with you.'
'Thanks, I am destined to love vampires and dance with slimy things.'
Spike cocked his head. 'Vampire's, plural?'
Buffy sighed, 'It's the drink, talking.'
'Then would you mind explainin why you saw fit to chase me out in the street?'
'I don't know, Spike, I just did. I don't wanna do this now. I'm tired and lonely and rapidly getting drunk. Not in the mood for talking.'
'Ok, luv. I won't push.'
Buffy looked up at him gratefully, before leaning over toward him and resting her head on his shoulder.
'Uh, luv, you do know that that is my shoulder.'
'Yeah,' Buffy snuggled further into the crook of his neck.
'Uh, if I don't move you, I'm not gonna be staked later am I?'
'Nope,'
Spike smiled slightly. 'Just you remember that when you sober up.'
He gently placed an arm around her waist and clasped her hand with the other.
On the dance floor Tara looked up and smiled.
Willow looked at her, 'what?'
'Nothing, just.this is nice.'
Willow placed her head on Tara's shoulder and smiled as well.
Buffy shifted against Spike, and he tensed for the staking that he was sure was about to come next.
'M, uncomfortable.' Buffy mumbled.
Spike released his grip on her waist to let her sit up.
'No,' she replaced his hand on her hip and clambered onto his lap, snuggling into his chest.
Tara chuckled at the look of amazement on Spikes face and Willow followed her gaze.
'Awwww, isn't that sweet.'
Tara nodded, surprised Willow had taken it so well.
'We'd just better stop Xander from seeing.'
Back at the table, Buffy lifted her head to look at Spike. 'What did you do with skanky hoe?'
'Left her at Willies, slipped out the back.'
Buffy chuckled. 'You silly vamp.'
Spike kissed the top of her head gently. 'I love you, Buffy.'
Buffy had snuggled back down and mumbled into his chest.
'Luv yotoo.'
Most of the guests had taken their seats, waiting for the ceremony to begin. Buffy's eyes darted around the room, searching for any signs of more trouble, with Mr Harris calmed down it was less likely, but it would still pay to keep her eyes open.
Walking toward the front entrance where she could have a better view the she suddenly saw Spike standing against the wall, looking across the room. She paused, what was she supposed to do? Did she carry on like she hadn't seen him? Did she talk to him? What was he going to do?
As she stared at him, his head turned toward her. Their eyes locked and they stared at each other, Spike being the first to reluctantly tear his gaze away, began studying his shoes as he scuffed one toe across the ground.
Buffy sighed; she couldn't leave things like this. As much as she would like to just walk past him and go on with her life and he with his, she couldn't leave things like this. There was just too much pain.
His was obvious to her, his whole stance screamed misery of his unlife and discomfort with his surroundings; and as much as she wished it didn't - it had hurt her to leave him, his kicked puppy gaze had almost broken her heart, and it hurt just as much to see him standing there.
Steeling herself against whatever was about to happen, she moved across the remaining space toward him.
Spike shifted slightly as she got closer, he knew she was coming over to him. But for what? To taunt him? To throw him out? To pretend that nothing happened? He knew that somehow the latter would kill him. He braced himself.
*Act cool, nothing happened, its just the slayer coming to say Hi.*
'Hello, Buffy.' He glanced up at her hesitantly, almost shyly.
She smiled awkwardly, but sweetly, and his heart melted at the sight of it. 'Hey.'
He paused, now what? 'It's a happy occasion.'
She nodded slightly.
*What the bleedin' hell are you thinking, you ponce? It's a happy occasion? Show her you don't care.*
'You meet my friend?'
Buffy tried not to smile at his obviously fake change in demeanour. His cocky smirk was back, but his eyes were sad.
'No,' she replied. 'Not yet,'
She paused. 'But she seems like a very.nice attempt at making me jealous.
Buffy mentally winced. *A nice attempt at making me jealous? Well there's a good way to get yourself into a conversation that you don't want to be having ever, especially near your friends. Also, very lame call. Note to self: open your mouth as little as possible from here on.*
Spike didn't seemed fazed and smiled, a small self-mocking smile. 'Is it working?'
Buffy paused. How the hell was she supposed to answer that? She was jealous, not madly jealous since the fact that he only brought the skank to do so was quite obvious. If he had brought someone else.someone more permanent looking, then she was sure the jealousy would have flared up major league.
*But we won't go there will we Buffy? No feelings for the soulless dead creature. Only pity.*
'A little.' He didn't respond. 'It doesn't change anything.but if you're wildly curious, yeah, it hurts.'
*What?!?!?! Buffy, get a grip. You are jealous that he isn't fawning over you anymore. You're ego has been dented, that's all. You do not feel hurt! And.even if you did, which you don't.you do not go around admitting it to Spike.*
Spike looked devastated for a moment. 'I'm sorry.'
Buffy marvelled that he could care so much, forgetting his own legitimate pain for her pathetic pain.
She smothered a small grin as he caught himself. Closing his eyes, briefly and shaking his head in that way she found so cute.
*Cute!?!?! The wedding is getting to you. Spike is not cute. He is a monster. An evil killing monster who destroys cuteness.*
'Or.Good.' He leaned in for emphasis and she couldn't suppress the smile this time. He was so sw.
*Not sweet. Not cute, not adorable.not gorgeous not anything that he looks like in that shirt.*
She liked that shirt on him. It wasn't his typical Bad Ass look, maybe it was the absence of the red, but he still looked good. Dark colours did suit him. Spike looked at her, sensing her awkwardness. 'You want us to go?'
'No. No, I ... you have every right to be here. I pretty much deserve-'
Buffy's fought the impulse not to sigh as he looked at her in that serious, intense way that made her spine tingle. Made her feel loved. 'That's not true, you.'
He caught himself and sighed. Glancing at the ceiling in frustration he muttered.
'God, this is hard.'
'Yeah.'
Spike sighed again. This was never going to work. 'I think we'll go.'
'Go where? To your place?' Buffy almost smacked herself in the face. *God, sound like a jealous ex much?*
Although.technically that was what she was. *Do not go there, Buffy.*
'Yeah,' Spike sounded slightly defensive. ' I suppose.'
He began juggling on the balls of his feet, another little quirk that Buffy lo.AHEM.liked about him. In an evil undead liking way.
'That was the idea.'
Buffy nodded, looking slightly humiliated.
'Evil.' Spike gestured to emphasise his point, clearing a tiny bit of the tension as Buffy acquiesced.
'Of course.'
Spike felt like he had been caught about to put his hand in the cookie jar. 'But I wont.'
Then he again remembered his Bad Ass image. 'Or I will.'
What was the point in pretending? It was Buffy. She could read him like a book anyway. *Bugger, but this was frustrating.*
'I'll just go. Give 'em my best or whatever. The happy couple.'
Buffy nodded, understanding. 'I will.'
Spike glanced at her again. His face softened as he took in her face, trying to commit this happy moment of hers to memory.he didn't know if he would see it again.
Buffy's heart softened under his gaze. How was it that he could make her feel so loved and needed in just a glance.where as her friends.
'It's nice to watch you be happy. For them, even. I don't see it a lot. You, uh... you glow.'
*Glow?!?!?! You soddin poof. You bleedin Peaches wannabe.*
Buffy smiled. 'That's because the dress is radioactive.'
Spike chuckled, and Buffy joined him. *The wackiness of the Scoobies*
Buffy looked up at him, the moment fading.
He looked down at her. 'I should, we should.'
She smiled. 'Yeah.'
They stood there for a minute, just staring.
Spike nodded to her and began to move away.
Buffy's heart started pounding as she watched him search for the girl he brought.
What was she doing? She was letting him go, she was letting him.wait. Why did it matter? It was Spike.evil dead. Who cares that he made her feel so alive.so loved. If she went back she would just be using him again.for that feeling of being needed.
Or would she?
Something was different. Her heart felt like it was breaking as she watched him grab the skank's arm and begin to drag her out.
As the couple reached the door, Spike turned and looked at her. His faced marred with confusion as he saw her watching him.a look on her face.what was it?
But she lowered her eyes and he sighed, dragging the girl out the door and into the dismal rain. At least the rain would immediately extinguish any flames caused by the dim sunlight.
Buffy glanced back up as he left, and before she could even contemplate her actions she had run out of the door after him, calling his name.
Spike heard his name and turned abruptly to find Buffy chasing down the road after him.
'Slayer?'
The girl on his arm turned to him, confused and annoyed. 'This is the slayer? You took me to wedding with the Slayer in attendance? What's the slayer doing at a demon wedding anyway?'
'Shut it.' Spike looked at Buffy who had come to stop in front of him, her eyes darting around in nervousness.
'Is everything alright? Baddies you need help with?'
'You help the Slayer?'
'I said shut up. She pays me, alright.'
'I, er that is.um.well.'
Spike was getting annoyed. *Stupid bints, never say what they mean, unless they are breaking your heart.*
'Spit it out, Slayer.' His tone came out much harsher than he meant it to, and he winced.
She glanced up at him. Anger clouded her eyes, followed by something he couldn't pick.
'Nothing, sorry to bother you.'
She turned away and walked back up the street, her head bowed tears fighting to finally run unchecked down her face.
Spike resisted the impulse to run after her, but paused as he was about to turn when is vamp ears caught a sniffle and his nose smelt salt.
The goth tugged on his arm, bringing him back to the present.
'Are you coming?' She whined and with a last pondering glance at the blonde figure he took her hand and walked off down the street.
****************
Buffy entered the room to see Xander who had just reappeared from somewhere out the back.
Buffy raised her eyebrows at him and he looked at her sheepishly, mouthing the words "couldn't find the ring".
Buffy smiled and shook her head and he looked at her in concern. He looked down at the old man who was tugging on his arm.
'Can't it wait. I'm kinda busy here.'
He moved over to Buffy. 'That weird guy has been following me everywhere, and I can't figure out who he is. Will's is checking to see if Anya knows him, cuz he is grating on my nerves and I wanna kick him out, but not if they are like close friends or something.'
He looked down at her.
'Are you ok? You look kinda, sad and teary.'
Buffy smiled as she dashed away the remaining tears. Just emotional. My little Xander is all grown up.'
Xander chuckled. 'Yep, that's me. Who'd have thought "can't get a date, Xander" would be the first to tie the knot?'
Buffy was about to reply when Willow walked up. 'Anya doesn't know who he is, so I got D'Hoffren to get one of his minions to throw the guy out.'
Buffy raised her eyebrows. 'You on speaking terms with D'Hoffren?'
Willow nodded and shifted her feet. 'You remember.after Oz left. My will be done.'
Buffy and Xander nodded.
'Lets not go there.' Willow nodded in agreement with Xnader, but Buffy hung her head.
They had been happy. That was the one time when she and Spike had been happy.
The musical tinkling of the piano brought them out of their reverie and Xander began to look terrified.
'Here we go.' They moved to take their places, Xander at the front of the room and Willow and Buffy ran to find Anya.
*******************
The service was over, not a moment to soon in Buffy's opinion. She had spent the entire service moving from row to row stopping fights, instead of taking her place dutifully at Anya's side.
It was hard to hear anything of the ceremony, the scuffles that had broken out between Demon and Human had drowned out Anya's quiet and Xander's shy voice.
Now she, like all the other bridesmaids except Halfrek, had changed from the awkward radioactive bridesmaids dresses into more comfortable clothes.
She was currently the only person sitting at the Bride and Grooms table. Everyone else was on the dance floor. Buffy smiled as she watched them dance.
Xander and Anya were still dancing together, for what was the tenth song. Anya had refused to let anyone cut in and Willow had been getting slightly annoyed, wanting to dance with Xander.
At the moment Willow was dancing with Tara, both being careful not to get to close, but trying to get as close as possible without seeming obvious; each shooting the other tiny glances and blushing when their eyes met.
Dawn was dancing with a young looking Demon boy, who Buffy was keeping a close eye on.
Suddenly the song ended and a new one came on. With a wry smile Buffy realised that it was 'Wind Beneath My Wings.'
Lots of eye rolling came from the crowd but all the couples moved together as the slow dance began.
Buffy, looked around the room. The only people other than her who weren't dancing were the members of the Harris family who had passed out under tables and on chairs and the Demons who looked like anything more complex than walking would tangle their tentacles.
The song grew louder and tears came to Buffy's eyes. They all looked so happy, all her friends and she was stuck by herself listening ti the song she had wanted to play at her wedding with Spike.
She reached for her glass of Champagne to find it empty. Looking around she saw a bottle of Bourbon at one of the Harris tables where all occupants were currently snoring.
She pushed herself up from the table she darted around the edge of the room to get the bottle and ran back again, hoping no one had seen her. None of the dancers appeared to have even looked up and she sank into the chair in relief, never noticing the figure at the door watched her as she lifted the bottle to her lips and drank down several mouthfuls before gasping and slamming the bottle onto the table.
Buffy lifted the bottle to her lips for a third time, ready to relish the burning pain of the liquid sliding down her throat to find that the bottle she had snatched hadn't been that full and was now empty.
'Fuck!'
She leaned forward and buried her head in her arms, the tears starting again. Why did she feel like this? Auuuurggghhhhh! Why was it so painful.
A cold touch on her arm caused her to raise her head and find a flask being held out to her. She took it gratefully, not even considering who was holding it, and took a few long gulps.
'Why?' She moaned at the ceiling, forgetting the other persons presence.
'Why can't I be normal? Why can't I love normal human's like everyone else on the planet.
'The whelp doesn't love a human.'
Buffy jumped and whirled to face the person sitting in the chair beside her.
'Anya is human.' Buffy picked up the flask and took another sip.
'God, this stuff tastes just as bad as it always did.'
Spike chuckled.
's'not funny.'
'Course not, luv. Now, you mind telling me why you aren't dancing? S' is our song after all.'
Buffy chuckled darkly. 'No one to dance with, no reason to dance.'
'Come on, luv, there's lots of slimy things who'd love to dance with you.'
'Thanks, I am destined to love vampires and dance with slimy things.'
Spike cocked his head. 'Vampire's, plural?'
Buffy sighed, 'It's the drink, talking.'
'Then would you mind explainin why you saw fit to chase me out in the street?'
'I don't know, Spike, I just did. I don't wanna do this now. I'm tired and lonely and rapidly getting drunk. Not in the mood for talking.'
'Ok, luv. I won't push.'
Buffy looked up at him gratefully, before leaning over toward him and resting her head on his shoulder.
'Uh, luv, you do know that that is my shoulder.'
'Yeah,' Buffy snuggled further into the crook of his neck.
'Uh, if I don't move you, I'm not gonna be staked later am I?'
'Nope,'
Spike smiled slightly. 'Just you remember that when you sober up.'
He gently placed an arm around her waist and clasped her hand with the other.
On the dance floor Tara looked up and smiled.
Willow looked at her, 'what?'
'Nothing, just.this is nice.'
Willow placed her head on Tara's shoulder and smiled as well.
Buffy shifted against Spike, and he tensed for the staking that he was sure was about to come next.
'M, uncomfortable.' Buffy mumbled.
Spike released his grip on her waist to let her sit up.
'No,' she replaced his hand on her hip and clambered onto his lap, snuggling into his chest.
Tara chuckled at the look of amazement on Spikes face and Willow followed her gaze.
'Awwww, isn't that sweet.'
Tara nodded, surprised Willow had taken it so well.
'We'd just better stop Xander from seeing.'
Back at the table, Buffy lifted her head to look at Spike. 'What did you do with skanky hoe?'
'Left her at Willies, slipped out the back.'
Buffy chuckled. 'You silly vamp.'
Spike kissed the top of her head gently. 'I love you, Buffy.'
Buffy had snuggled back down and mumbled into his chest.
'Luv yotoo.'