All There Was To It

James's P.O.V

Seventeen.

What do you know for sure at seventeen?

Who your friends are? No. They could be lying to you.

Who your parents are? No. They could be lying to you.

Who you are? No. You could be lying to yourself.

So excluding society affairs. What do you know?

That leaves are green? That the sun is yellow? That the sea is blue?

No.

Nothing is certain. Leaves can turn brown. The sun can turn orange. Even the sea can turn green.

At seventeen, I knew nothing. Nothing was totally correct. I didn't mind, there was nothing I could know for sure and there was nothing I could do about it. The only thing I didn't know and I hated not knowing was who my friends were. Three years away from your friends can do that to you.

I went to the American Academy For Magical Studying since the age of fourteen, when I had to move to northern America because my dad was reassigned. He was an Auror. It was awful saying goodbye to my friends but my father allowed me to go back to Hogwarts for my last year. That's what I kept telling myself over and over again to make the departure less tearful. Not that I was going to cry, I wasn't the type.

My parents informed me of their plans a month before they were due at the American Ministry Of Magic. That day I sent owls to my four best friends and for the following thirty days, I was the happiest guy alive. We didn't talk about it but I knew that once I would be gone our friendship would waver. We would be too many miles apart.

/-/-/-/-

A day before the departure I was sitting in my backyard, on the ground, by myself. It was a full moon night and three of my best friends were, sort of, 'busy'. When I told my parents earlier that day that I planned to stay at my friend's, Remus, house for the night they didn't allow it. Their excuse? 'You haven't packed all your stuff Jamesie'. Like they couldn't wave their wands and everything would be ready in a second.

So that's how I turned out lying on hard soil at nine thirty at night.

"Hey, Potter".

I looked up and saw one of my best friends grinning at me.

"I thought you would be out with the other boys tonight" she said, sitting down next to me.

"My parents wanted me to pack my stuff," I said bitterly.

"Like they couldn't wave their wands and everything would be ready in a second".

I smiled. That girl was too much like me.

"So, excited about the trip?"

I gave her a look that spoke more clearly than any words I could've said.

She laughed. "Yah, I guess you wouldn't be. But try to be a bit more optimistic, or the next three years would be hell for you".

I blinked. Three years. It sounded like such a long time. I looked at her. "Lily".

She looked at me and her expression tore me apart. She tried to be cheerful, but I could tell she knew that things wouldn't be the same.

"I don't want us to stop being friends. Ever".

She just stared at me for a moment, not saying a thing. "I don't want us to stop being friends either".

We were both silent for a few seconds.

"Lets make an oath" Lily said suddenly.

"What oath?"

"Lets swear that we will never let distance bring us apart. No matter how far away we are from each other, we won't let it stop us from being friends".

It meant the world to me that she cared enough to suggest it. Taken seriously, it meant taking our will power to the extreme. Obviously, I agreed.

The departure the day after was calm. They all came to say goodbye. Even Remus, who was supported slightly by Lily. A second before the portkey was activated, I looked into Lily's eyes and our oath went through my mind. Lily's words as clear in my memory as though she had just spoken them.

And then she was gone.

/-/-/-/-/

The next three years were dull. Well, not completely. For the first eight months I exchanged letters with the other Marauders and Lily. Things were good. I missed all of them terribly but there was nothing I could do about it.

About my American school… Well, I hung out with a few guys but I wouldn't call them friends. I went out with a few girls but they weren't what I was looking for. I couldn't settle in and I always wanted to go back.

Towards the end of the first April away from England things began to change.

I got a letter from Lily the day before and she wrote to me about a guy that pulled a prank on her and how she was sick of guys and never wanted to go out with anyone ever again and that she will die an old maid with me as her only friend. It amused me.

Lily couldn't stay single for five minutes. She was like me. She never took them seriously though. Every guy was a passing amusement. She always said that she preferred sitting on a tree talking to me than hanging out with them. She always preferred me.

That was my mistake. I started thinking differently about her since she sent me that letter. Obviously, once I realized where my thoughts were going I panicked. She was my best friend! I couldn't think about her that way. Those were just Sirius's thought going through my mind; he always teased us about being so close.

But it was no use. I was hooked. After a few hours my responding letter was finished, 'soaked' with my feelings for her and I sent it. I waited. I waited days, then weeks, then months. I never stopped waiting for her reply, but it didn't come. She never wrote back and I didn't write to her again.

I still wrote to the Marauders. I got all kinds of versions whenever I would ask about Lily. 'She is doing good', 'She had a bit of a cold the other day', 'She got a perfect score for her last charms essay'. It was obvious they knew what was going on but they didn't mention it, so neither did I. I trusted them, if they didn't write about it they probably had a good reason.

It became a routine. I would get a letter every morning. I would go to class. I would hang out with my, dare I say it, friends. I would write my response at night and that's all there was to it. I didn't visit the guys during the holydays. Like I said, dull.

I wasn't too excited about going back to England at august. I went to the American Ministry Of Magic, got a portkey to a side street close to my house and walked from there. My parents let me go after I convinced them that as a seventeen-year-old I would have no problem getting by for a few days by myself. I would be going back to Hogwarts a few days later anyway.

I got to the house at about seven PM. I went to the living room and I had just opened the door-

"SURPRISE!"