Wrong, wrong, wrong. So unbelievably wrong…

Or was it?

The way Uruha's hands felt on his skin didn't seem wrong. And his body was screaming for the guitarist to continue his sexy kisses and smooth touches. Ruki let his head fall back, moaning in pleasure as Uruha's plush lips played with his neck. Softly, he bit down and Ruki prayed to God he didn't leave a mark.

"Uru…" He muttered, trying to push the blond away. "I can't…"

"Yes…" Uruha purred sensually, pushing Ruki back on the bed. "You can."

As Uruha slithered up his body, placing little kisses everywhere, Ruki found he was right. This would be a one time thing and Mori would never have to know…

He prayed to God she never had to know. She would hate him. He felt tears in his eyes, slowly emerging but he still was unwilling to make Uruha stop.

Yes. He told himself. I don't want to hurt her. Just a one time thing. She never has to know…

Right?

xxxxx

It was just a one time thing.

As a matter of fact, it happened many times, bruising Ruki's emotional stability each and every time. Even now, Ruki was heading from Uruha's apartment to his own. He kept his hands in the pockets of his jeans, his head hung low as he walked down the sidewalk towards the door to the one-bedroom apartment in which he lived alone. He pulled out his keys, guilt weighing on his shoulders as he unlocked the door.

Pushing it open, he swallowed hard as he saw his dog run up to him smiling and happy and unashamed of his owner.

Little does he know. Ruki thought.

Ruki leaned down, closing the door behind him and throwing the keys on the table before petting the dog generously.

"Dogs are smart." Ruki stated. "Am I a bad person to do this to her?"

Just then, Mori ran into the room, her wavy burgundy hair bouncing at her shoulders. She beamed at him and giggling when he jumped.

Ruki quickly got to his feet, suddenly very frightened for his words.

Had she heard him?

The look on her face said otherwise.

"Ruki!" She exclaimed happily before running into his arms. "You're home early! It seems I'm caught."Ruki knew that whatever she was up to was in no way as horrible as what he was. She kissed his cheek before placing her lips on his. Ruki deepened the kiss, desperate for comfort.

When they broke apart, there was a torn look in his eyes.

"What's wrong?" She asked softly touching his flawless face.

His heart broke at the sight, his eyes getting glassy before he buried his face in her hair.

"Mori…" He whispered as she held him.

"Ruki? Oh, God, what's wrong?" She lead him over to the couch, sitting him down before placing herself beside him.

She pulled his head out of her hair before holding his face in her hands. She had the most concerned, caring look in her eyes that Ruki just let his tears fall, a small sob escaping from his lips as he shook his head.

"I can't do this anymore…" He muttered.

"Do what, Ruki?" She asked quietly, stroking his hair.

"I'm so sorry." He shook his head, before pushing her hands away and storming out the door.

"Ruki!" She called after him, but once she got to the door, he was gone.

She didn't know where he'd disappeared to, but she groaned before closing the door and walking back to the kitchen. She pulled the half-burnt cookies out of the oven, sighing at their state before walking over to try and prepare her special spaghetti that Kai had taught her how to make that Ruki seemed to like so much. She had made it especially for him, hell, she'd made a whole meal for him. She went out and bought a Chardon that Uruha would be jealous of later, but she could care less.

Uruha was funny, anyways. He smiled a lot at her, as if he had some secret that he was never willing to tell. But she knew that when she wasn't looking, his expression turned guilty. A couple weeks ago, she'd just pushed it aside and told herself she wasn't going to worry about it. She trusted Uruha, just as she trusted Aoi and Reita and Kai and even more-so Ruki. They were her friends.

The thought had her smiling.

She picked up the extra bottle of Chardon she had bought, putting it in her bag before walking out the door and locking it behind her. She grinned as she walked towards Uruha's apartment.

She felt bad for not getting him a bottle, so she had went back and got another one. She might as well deliver it now considering Ruki probably wouldn't be back for a while.

xxxxx

Ruki walked past Kai coming out of Uruha's apartment.

"Ruki?" Kai looked worried at the vocalist's state. "Are you okay?"

Ruki's head jerked up, his expression shocked as Kai looked at him expectantly.

"Kai?" Ruki choked. "What are you doing here?"

"I just came by to give Uruha the contract the manager gave us." Kai told Ruki with a breathtaking smile that had Ruki looking away. "He said he lost his copy. He's pretty happy today, too."

"Oh." Ruki nodded, not saying another word.

Of course, happy-go-lucky-I-love-everybody Kai wouldn't have that.

"What are you doing here?" Kai then asked.

"I-uh-I just-well, I…" Ruki struggled for words, his eyes growing wide at just how guilty he sounded. "I was just…you know…coming by to say hi."

"Mori called and said she was fixing you dinner tonight." Kai told him, his smile wavering a little before he tilted his head at Ruki. "She said she was making my spaghetti tonight."

Ruki resisted a low moan as his mouth began to water. And he missed out on that?

God, he was a dumbass.

"Oh, I…uh, didn't know." Ruki scratched the back of his head.

"Ruki, are sure you're okay?" Kai asked.

"Never said I was in the first place." Ruki muttered.

"Oh, can I help?" Kai inquired, taking a step forward.

"Doubt it." Ruki frowned at the ground. "I better go."

"Right." Kai bit his lip. "You know, Ruki, whenever you need me, I'll always be here, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah." Ruki nodded, anxious to get upstairs.

Ruki defied the urge to gasp as Kai's arms wrapped around him, the drummers breath cool and calming against his neck. Ruki didn't hug back, he didn't know what to do, but he stood frozen until Kai kissed him on the cheek, shocking him even more.

Ruki stared ahead before Kai half-smiled, still as cute as ever, before walking away.

The blond groaned once Kai was out of earshot. He shook his head, running a hand through his hair before running up the stairs towards Uruha's apartment. He banged on the door ruthlessly, tension building up in him with anxiety and frustration and anger.

He hated himself.

He didn't hate Uruha. He most certainly didn't hate Mori. And he just couldn't hate Kai.

But he despised himself.

Uruha opened the door, smiling.

"Kai, what-" He stopped there, beaming at Ruki until he saw the glint in the vocalists eyes. "Ruki?"

Ruki didn't speak.

He grabbed Uruha by the collar, yanking him into a kiss.

He pulled him so hard, that he pulled Uruha into the hall with him, the door slamming shut behind the guitarist. Uruha didn't hesitate though, when Ruki's tongue pushed against his lips. He let Ruki push him back against the door, hitching his leg up around Ruki's. Uruha tangled his fingers in Ruki's hair, moaning as Ruki's tongue hit just the right spot.

And then there was shattering.

Ruki pulled away from Uruha, shocked to where they both looked around for the cause of the crash.

Ruki's heart dropped when he saw Mori, standing at the end of the hall. Her face a mix of everything. Pain, anguish, shock and heartbreak. She gasped for breath as tears suddenly poured down her face in her spoiled mood. She forgot about the shattered glass at her feet, just staring at her boyfriend and his friend and the way they jumped away from each other even though they were obviously caught.

"Ru…" She whispered. "I…I'm sorry, I just…I came to give Uruha the extra Chardon…I didn't…I…"

She shook her head ruthlessly, anger suddenly taking over as Ruki and Uruha's expressions were suddenly just took guilty and ashamed to feel pity for anymore.

"How?" She cried. "How could you? Both of you! Uru, I thought you were my friend."

"Mori, I never meant to-"

"Don't." Mori shook her head, gasping out sobs. "Please. I don't want excuses. You could've just told me, Ruki, if he was the one you wanted. You could've just told me that you didn't like girls in the first place!"

"No, Mori, I do!" Ruki took a step forward, freezing when she retreated a pace. "I want you! You're the one I want!"

"Ruki, please don't ruin everything for yourself!" She demanded. "You've ruined it for us. Please don't ruin it for you and Uruha, too."

At that, she sobbed, turning and running down the stairs. Ruki chased after her, Uruha trailing behind.

Mori pushed the glass door open, running outside and right into the rain. She didn't even care, letting the salty wetness of tears on her face mix with natures form of cleansing. She ran through the parking lot, shocked when someone grabbed her arm.

"Mori, wait, let me explain." Ruki pleaded.

"Ruki, no." She shook her head, her wet hair clinging to her cheeks. "Can't you just leave me alone?"

"No!" He said, crying himself now. "I love you! Please don't leave me…"

"Ru, people who love each other don't cheat on each other." Mori laughed dryly. "I never cheated on you…I thought you were better than that."

"I know you never cheated! Why do you think I feel so fucking guilty all the time?" Ruki demanded. "Is that why you were crying?" The thought suddenly dawned on her.

"Yes." He nodded, his hair shaking.

She tried to memorize the way he looked in the rain. He was just so beautiful, that her heart broke yet again. She couldn't have him anymore.

"It was amazing while it lasted." She whispered, turning away.

"No, Mori!" Ruki jogged in front of her.

"Mori, wait!" Uruha tried. "Please, I forced Ruki to do this. If you're going to be mad at anybody, please be mad at me."

She shook her head. "I'm not mad at either of you! I just want to get away…Please…haven't you both done enough?"

She pleaded, sobbing as Ruki tried to reach for her and she refused, when finally Kai ran up.

"What's wrong?" Kai asked her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"Kai." She wrapped her arms around the drummer, in no way trying to spite Ruki but only because she needed a hug. "Good bye."

"What? Where are you going?" Kai asked as he hugged her back before she pushed away.

She didn't answer, but turned and ran.

"Mori!" Ruki cried.

"Ruki!" Uruha and Kai called after him as the vocalist ran after her.

His short legs carried him as fast as he could, but he still couldn't catch up with her. By the time she slipped away, he was near his apartment. He breathed a sob before running to his out, already out of breath.

Once he was inside, he collapsed on the floor.

He cried and cried, faintly smelling the soft scent of Mori's cherry blossom perfume and shaking his head. He'd screwed up. He'd screwed up big time. He hated himself, even more than he had before. He had lost the most important thing in his life, ever.

What was he going to do…?

He dragged himself to his feet, making his way towards the kitchen. He swallowed hard at the freshly made cookies that were packed away in a tub-a-ware bowl. Then he saw the spaghetti, getting cold in the microwave. He closed his eyes, taking a shaky breath.

When he opened them again, his eyes caught the red wild flowers on the counter with a little letter sitting in front with his name scratched on it in green pen, also in her chicken-scratch handwriting that made him, even now, smile if only a little.

He slowly made his way towards the flowers, touching the soft red petals. His hand trailed down the stems towards the letter. He picked it up, opening it hastily.

He pulled out the piece of paper, taking another steadying breath before he opened it.

Ruki,

I know, it's kind of cheesy for the girls to get the guys flowers but I saw these and they instantly reminded me of you. I'm not sure of the name, because I wasn't paying any attention to the sales lady. But they looked vibrant and beautiful, just like you. Plus red always reminds me of you for some reason.

If you don't remember, then tonight's our one year anniversary. I don't mind if you didn't, because I know how guys are, and I know you probably wouldn't care anyways.

I made you your favorite meal tonight, and I hope it's okay. Hopefully, I'll be able to force you to read this in the morning when I leave, though. It'd just be so embarrassing if I was standing right there.

I just wanted you to know, Ruki, that no matter what I will always love you. I hope you don't mind me saying that. But I do. I love you more than anything in the entire world. And even if it turned out that you'd murdered my entire family with an axe (including my dogs, which I would probably have to severely punish you for because I love my dogs) I would still love you. No matter what. I promise.

I love you, Ruki.

Aishiteru, tsuneni.

All my love,

Your Mori

Ruki stood there, his mouth hanging open in shock. Slowly, the letter slipped from his fingers towards the ground. He just stared ahead, tears unconsciously pouring out of his eyes. He choked before falling down the floor and huddling against the cabinets.

"Mori…" He whispered.

He grabbed the letter and held it to his chest, tightly.

"Mori, I miss you." He said quietly, yet again to himself.

He sobbed before hearing a knock at the door. He slowly trudged to his feet before stumbling to go answer it.

He opened the door to see Mori, her arms crossed and a small smile on her face.

"M…Mori?" Ruki muttered.

"Hai." She sighed. "I'm holding up to my promise."

Ruki sighed brokenly, a new hope lighting his eyes as Mori hesitantly stepped through the door. She wrapped her arms around Ruki and buried her face in his damp shirt.

"I love you." Ruki said, his voice breaking. "I'm so sorry."

"Let's just forget about it." She smiled. "I guess I'll have to give Uruha my other bottle of Chardon since I broke his…"

"He'll get over it." Ruki held onto her tighter.

"But I feel bad." She muttered.

He groaned. "God, Mori, please stop. You make me feel like I'm horrible when you say things like that."

"Exactly how did you think I was going to punish you for your wrong-doings, Ruki?" She pulled away, smirking up at him. "Besides the obvious."

"Oh…wait, what's the obvious?" He asked as she turned towards the kitchen to go try and make use of the spaghetti.

"Think, Ru-chan." She smiled over her shoulder wistfully and he groaned.

"Mori!" He pleaded. "Please no!"

She laughed. "You have no room to talk, mister. I think you've had enough action to last you at least two to three weeks."

Ruki sighed, shaking his head. "God, I'm an asshole."

"No, you're not." She kissed his cheek lovingly.

"Sorry." He said. "I'm going to say that a lot from now on. Sorry."

"Don't." She pecked him on the lips before grinning as she turned back to the kitchen.

Ruki touched his lips, smiling after her.

He loved her.

He ran after her then, wrapping his arms around her as she heated up the spaghetti.

"Smells good." He said as he kissed her neck softly.

"Not gonna work." She commented, yet not removing his arms from around him. "And thank you. But it would've been much better if it hadn't of gotten cold when someone threw a temper tantrum."

"Sorry." Ruki muttered, biting her ear.

"Ugh." She twisted her head away. "No, Ruki. I already told you, I'm not giving in."

Ruki groaned. "Fine. We don't have to go all the way…"

"No."

Comments:

Since most of it was really sad, I tried to put in a little humor at the end. J

Now, what guy does not want a girl like our Mori-chan here?

She's perfect! She'll find you cheating with a GUY and still stay with you.

That's what I call dedication.

That is something I would not and could not do. :D

I'll be your bestest bud if ya review!