NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR - Okay, I had ONE idea when I started this ... story, and it is exactly 0209 am now as I type this very sentence, so do not blame me for the trash I write. I'm a little bit mad.
Disclaimer: I claim not a thing, not even this disclaimer. I have taken all characters from Marvel (it might upset them if I used some DC characters, no?). All feed back welcome ... if you are going to flame this story I suggest fire safety precautions.
Anything between these | are the author's millions of personalities speaking as she has an active role in this (and speaks about herself in third person) WAIT !!! DON'T READ THE STORY YET!!! It's meant to be humourous or at least not serious enough to class as anything.
Jubilee.
THE END.
Oh no, apparently you need more words, and punctuation and speech to create a story than that, never mind.
THE BEGINNING...
Jubilee ...
|Don't start all that again ...|
Hear me out!
|Fine.|
Jubilee ...
|You've said that already|
Fine.
was standing -
|Who?|
What?
|Who was standing?|
Jubilee ...
|This is ridiculous.|
ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT I'll start it a DIFFERENT way, OKAY?
|Right.|
Scott Summers, leader of the X-Men, husband of Jean Grey, the most picked on character in this story, was in the Danger Room Not doing anything ... just standing there ... in the Danger Room. Did we mention there was a Danger Room? Right, anyway, so he's standing there and then ... um ... right.
|Then ...?|
Suddenly, and for no apparent reason, a giant sink fell down from on high, and hit Scott's toe, causing him some minor discomfort. *That. Was. Odd.* Scott's minescule brain took time to conjure three words. "Scott? Honey?" Jean was there, now, asking him why he had just imagined a giant sink had landed on his toe and caused him some minor discomfort. *God. Damned. Tele ... Jean?* *Yes, Scott?* *How do you spell telepathic?* *T-E-L-E-P-A-T-H-I-C* *Am I telepathic?* *No, Scott, you're telepathetic.* Jean smiled evilly at him *Thank god he can sometimes appear intelligent*
Suddenly, the Men In Black ran in, and wiped you (the reader's) memory with that flashing laser pen they carry. You have forgotten the previous crap that I have just typed.
"Hey!!!" yelled Scott at me, the writer "Are you editing me out?" Yes, Scott. |Yeah! Kill him off!! I would chant that again but the effort would exaust me|
WAIT!!! It's time for a ROMANTIC moment!!!
ROGUE: Gambit ... I love you!!!
Gambit: Chere ... I love Colossus.
Colossus: I love Lockheed.
Kitty: WHAT?!!
Storm: I love you, the reader at home!
Professor Xavier: My "ONE TRUE LOVE" is called Lilandra she's my "ONE TRUE LOVE!" and the comics can't seem to stop saying "XAVIER'S ONE TRUE LOVE" over and over again. She lives in space.
Psylocke: I love you, Warren. Even if you do shed like a chicken.
Warren: Shut up, Betsy.
Jean: I lo... I AM PHOENIX!!!
Scott: Hi Phoenix, nice to see you again ... and again ... and again ... and again ... and oh, yes, again! Tea?
At this point you decide to shut the application down.
I thought you'd be back.
OKAY!!! Every good X-Men story needs a fighting scene. |Why?| So Wolverine can say some tacky catchphrases ending in bub. |Okay| WOLVERINE ATTACKS PROFESSOR XAVIER. WOLVERINE IS ARRESTED FOR ASSAULT. For show, Wolverine says "45 life sentences won't outlive me, bub!" to the Judge as he is dragged away. GAMBIT ATTACKS JEAN. JEAN IS PHOENIX. NOBODY EVEN CARES ANYMORE, BESIDES, SHE'S ALREADY BEEN KILLED OFF TWICE AND NO ONE'S NOTICED. SHE GOT BETTER, ANYWAY. BEAST MUST BE A CLEVER DOCTOR IF HE CAN DO THAT. TWICE. Are we still talking about the same thing? Because I'm talking about the time Beast did that thing to Scott twice and ... oh.
Right, nuff mindless violence, let's add some Chemical X to the concoction.
Let's start at the beginning, children:
Once upon a time, when the moon was full, the sun was shining and the clocks all pointed to twelve noon. It was a Sunny Sunday morning, last Tuesday night when the X-Men all went out to fight Magneto. When they had beaten up Scott Summers, they continued onwards to find their worst enemy. Storm was the first to notice that the trees were all upside down, and that their roots were planted firmly into the nearest post box. The X-Men decided that this was obviously Deathbird's fault, and they proceeded to (no, not kill, X-Men don't kill ... just maim a little) force her to watch the Sunset Beach Omnibus on channel 5, which made her suddenly and for no reason speak all her thoughts out loud, like they do in the program (e.g "I must steal my own mother's baby and pretend it is my own, that way the witch woman can give some poor sod a disease that gives her spots on her face. Then, there will be an earthquake in which anyone who dies will later turn out not to be dead at all, merely deeply asleep ... JEAN!). Afterwards, Professor Xavier started spouting off about how all mutants had a duty to serve mankind, while mankind ordered that the mutants get it grapes or it would have the mutants killed.
"There's billions says Jeffrey all under one room, it's called Toys 'R' Us, Toys 'R' Us, Toys 'R' Us!!!"
Sorry, stupid commercials.
This is really freaking you out now, I can tell the time is now - 247 am, and thank god I have decided to skip school tomorrow.
THIS IS BLANK. No, wait, it WAS blank before I started writing about how it was blank. The X-Men aren't in this very much, are they? Okay, here's The X-Men.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
There.
I give up.
I might write something else ... later... when my tiny fragile mind thinks of someway to put the X-Men in it with doing THAT thing again.
It's done, okay?