Its been three years.
Three long years.
I know they thought I was kidding when I said goodbye, I guess that, that phrase was over used. We only ever had to say "see you later", something I know that we all took for granted. Long summer days, stupid adventures, and petty deaths never to come again. This time we all go our separate ways, though I have no doubt that our paths intersect in the future.
Its inevitable.
I'm gone now.
The worst part about leaving was that I didn't even have a chance to say it to Karen. Parents didn't care, Kevin long gone (not that I cared about him at all). But Karen, she was basically like my daughter, seeing as I brought most of the money, keeping the small damaged old fridge stuffed with produce.
I told the guys, Stan, Kyle, Butters, Craig, Token, Clyde, Tweek, and even Cartman.
Not like they took me seriously, and even if they did, I doubt they would care.
The only person that really got it though, was Wendy.
Me and her had grown close over the course of high school. I took the same AP and Honors classes that she, Butters, and Kyle were in. And I guess after awhile, awkward study sessions and test preparations, she realized that I wasn't such a bad guy, and took a bit of a liking to me. You could call her my best friend, since are relation ship is non-sexual. We had abstained from any of that, not that either of us was interested. Both busy with life. But even she could never understand the seriousness of my situation.
Because right after graduation, I left.
My goodbye was in my valedictorian speech, I don't think anyone got it, but that's okay.
Kenneth McCormick, valedictorian.
But that's beside the point. After the ceremony (which his parents did not attend) I didn't bother going home. Earlier that day I had stashed a bag of the things I needed to get out of this godforsaken hell hole. The four of us headed to his house to change before they went to a party being hosted by Clyde and Bebe.
When we got to Stan's, I ran up the stairs, and once I got to his room, threw off my cap and gown. I changed throwing on a tattered thermal and jeans, but before I left I pulled Stan into the bathroom so that we could speak alone, disregarding Cartmans comment about how we were "Fags".
"What is it Kenny?" he said with his usual Stan niceness, not even questioning that I had Just yanked him into his own bathroom.
"I want you to know, that when I return, you and Kyle better be fucking" I said in my most serious face, keeping my voice calm.
"erm. Whah?" his cheeks tinted pink.
I knew that they had it bad for each other, weather they knew it or not. It had been obvious to every body in the town since they had declared their "super best friendship. And as much as I don't want to admit it, fastass was right about this one thing.
I knew Stan wouldn't catch on to that "When I return" part, but that wasn't what mattered. Kyle and Stan belonged together, I often found myself wishing I had had that kind of companionship that they have. Its all I used to strive for.
I mean Stan's my friend, but he's not my super best friend. That was a role that Kyle was happy to play, and I was happy to watch.
"Wait, hold up" I interrupted before he could finish speaking, "You guys already fucked?" I stood their grinning like the unbelievable bastard that I am.
He shook his head, turning into an even deeper shade of pink.
"Kissed?, fucked around?, anything" I squeaked desperately.
"No, Kenny" he spoke in an exasperated puff.
"Okay man, but when I get back you two better get your act together, 'kay?" smirk not leaving my face.
"Yeah, yeah, sure, whatever" he droned.
I fled out of the bathroom before he could put two and two together. Just as I ran out the door I heard his familiar "Kenny wait". But even then, I was already to far gone.
I knew he wouldn't bother running after me in this stuffy, weather. Stan had always been my best friend, I would miss him for a long time, but I knew that I had to get out.
I didn't want to get stuck.
And if I had stayed any longer I would have.
There's always going to be Christophe, his mom trying to force him into Catholicism, and him leaving her to go smoke in the park with Tweek, lady watching.
I know they'd stay like that until Craig came and got Tweek, and then Christophe would walk sadly back to Gregory.
They would make it out someday, maybe.
But waiting for other people to move on was not going to work for me. I think being on my own will help,I always want to help everyone else, I'm the one whose supposed to catch every one else when the current lets them go.
Maybe I can get along with myself and that would be better, I never did get along that well with anybody else. This may sound stupid, and really selfish, but nobody really understood me. I know I can's just stay here.
The sun had already began to set as I walked towards the horizon in the direction of the bus station, with only my tattered, overused backpack on my shoulders, and my parka tied around my waist.
When I arrived to the station, trying to buy my ticket for California, before giving me it, the man in the booth gave me a look. It seemed like he knew I was running off. People always give you looks like they might speak up, or say something for the better. But they never do.
Getting on and seated wasn't a problem, I just avoided any side glances or icy stares from people that I don't and will never know.
My eyes fluttered open as I felt face being squished against something cold. Turns out that I had fallen asleep with my head against the window.
Looking outside I saw street lights glowing orange. My phone read two-thirty. Its funny because most people usually sleep at two thirty, but I've always loved night adventuring. I would just lie awake, or sleep for a bit, but once the town was asleep, it was my time. People who caught me out in the night always suspected that I was some sort of trouble making prostitute. I guess they were right about one thing, because some of those days I would find Craig outside smoking, and we would go light up in an old abandoned car. We never did say anything to each other though. The one thing.
And i guess it was better that way.
But at least now I know what he would have said.
At least now I have some solace.
I always wondered why people would call me a slut, or a man whore, or that girls would expect me to do any of them at parties. I'll admit, when I was younger I made a few mistakes on my sexual escapades, but I never lost my virginity in any of those acts. After Elementary school I started to get my act together, to cut down on the things that were holding me back. I knew if I had stayed in the same place I would still be just another white-trash county kid. That's not what I wanted for myself. I wanted something better, something different. The worst part about it though, is that I was still a virgin. I don't even think that anybody besides Wendy knew that. And it only changed recently.
But I'm getting way ahead of myself.
The train ride was excruciatingly hot, long, and uncomfortable, but at least I didn't have to worry about things financially.
Which was a first.
All throughout high school I had worked, not letting my family know that I had any money, because of course they would take it. The only person who received my money was Karen, and that was only a measly forty dollars, when I have saved up over two thousand already. I even worked a second job during my junior and senior years, because I knew that at some point I would need it.
And boy was I right.
I tried to sleep a bit more, I knew it would pay off in the morning if I did. But unfortunately that didn't happen. I was stuck, wide awake staring into the blur of orange and a blue so dark it almost seemed black. For some reason those colors always calm me down. My chest wouldn't feel so sunken in, they made me feel like I belong here.
Wherever here is.
I suppose its his fault. Blue was his favorite color, his hat was blue, his jacket, even his room. I remember when we used to bump into each other at school he would always flip me off, like he did with everyone else, but he always did it with a sort of silent smirk on his face as if to say "See ya later, McCormick".
I think the night I arrived in Berkeley was the hardest. Because on the bus nobody talks to you. But once you step out, onto the pavement, you have to face the real world.
South park was never this alive, and although the city seems busy, it still has a sort of comforting vibe about it.
I like it, its different.