It's Back
Ziva spent so long repressing her urges to be with Tony that now she could hardly recognize the feelings were there. After countless years of telling herself that he was her friend, her brother, she believed it. When had the flirting become teasing? And when had the teasing stopped being dirty? When had they stopped altogether?
Ziva can't remember when they had stopped. It was somewhere between Jeane and Micheal, then Ray and E.J. It was somewhere between Jenny's death and Ziva's almost death. Even years after those relationships had finished, Tony and Ziva never went back to their "old selves".
When the team celebrates Tony's 50th birthday something strange happens. It's after the party. When Palmer and Breena and their three kids had left. When Abby and Tim had to take their snarling teenager back. It was after Gibbs had taken a sloshed Ducky home and Anthony DiNozzo Sr. had passed out on the couch.
It's just him and her cleaning up the remains of the party. It's not like they haven't done this before, it's the same drill every year. After the cleaning is done, they both sit at his kitchen table and talk.
Ziva's surprised that Tony's not going through a midlife crisis. It always surprised her that he didn't really care about age. He cared about looks, but he never really cared about aging.
It's a joke made by Ziva that reawakens those old feelings.
"Remember Tony. You are only old when you're birthday comes and you can't." Ziva smiles and laughs and so does Tony. And in those few words feelings shift in both of them.
But to account for the shifting of emotions the talk becomes serious.
"What's your biggest regret?" Tony asked as he poured himself some of the left over wine.
"I don't have regrets." Ziva said instantly. "I believe that whatever's happened, happened for a reason."
"Do you ever regret not sleeping with me?" Tony said and it was the seriousness in his voice that had her gaping.
"When I was 30 I regretted it, but not now. If I would have slept with you while we were becoming friends I do not think I would know you."
"Why didn't we sleep together after? When we went undercover in Bora Bora? Or when we vacationed in the Colorado mountains? We've had plenty of chances."
Ziva pondered his question for a little while before answering. "I'm not sure, we were chomping at the bit for the longest time."
"That's my point. Where did all of our passion go?" Tony asked as he grabbed Ziva's hand. "Why did we let it go?"
Ziva looked at Tony and recognized something. "You're scared."
"What are you talking about?" Tony asked skeptically as he let go of Ziva's hand.
"You are absolutely terrified because you think that you've let love slip away from you."
Tony gaped at Ziva. How could she possibly know that when he hadn't even reached that conclusion yet?
"You're right." He said. Then raised an eyebrow at her. "But you never answered my question. Why did we let the passion go?"
"Did we? We suppressed it, ignored it, but I don't think we ever let it go. Isn't the passion why we're best friends?"
"You believe the passion is still there?" Tony asked disbelieving but hopeful none the less.
Ziva doesn't answer, she leans across the table and kisses him. When Tony doesn't respond she pulls back.
"I didn't feel anything." Ziva said. "Did you?"
"No. That's a bit disappointing." Tony said.
There's an awkward silence and then Ziva stands up. "Well, I guess it's time for me to go."
"I'll walk you to your car." Tony says and stands up also.
Ziva nods her head and makes her way towards the door. When she turns around to ask Tony a question her lips are assaulted.
The surprise makes her arms come quick around Tony and hang on. Her mouth was already open to speak so she gladly lets Tony in. Minutes pass, but the passion doesn't. The passion is back. And this time, at this point in their lives, nothing is going to hold it back.