AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hey,you! It's been a while since I've delved into Final Fantasy fanfiction (or fanfiction at all, really), but we all knew the stress of year 12 exams could have only one possibly outcome… Yes. That's right. Rather than studying, I have started playing FFX-2 AGAIN. And to mark the occasion I give you this—a fair enough trade off for the drama essays I should have been learning for tomorrows exam, if you ask me. Those of you who know me will know that I'm traditionally a Paine/Baralai sort of girl, but I thought I'd try something different. Anyone offended by blatant homosexuality should probably stop reading here. ^_ So, without further ado, I leave you. Please don't forget to drop me a line if you enjoyed it! – Becky.

Chapter 1: Day 5

It was near midnight on the fifth day of the festival when Gippal arrived, and Rikku couldn't help but feel a little put out. Yes, Besaid's 'Eight Days of Repentence' was a Yevonite festival, and yes, Gippal was an Al Bhed (she was too!) but she had specifically asked him to come—the big meanie! Anyway, to add insult to injury, now the fifth day—his day—was almost over and he snuck off with Paine rather than see her? As if she wouldn't have heard him land?

Growling irritably to herself Rikku trudged down the dirt path to the beach. It had been Yuna's idea to invite Gippal. He wasn't much for Yevon, but he was big on festivals, and besides that—she needed him to take part. The festival was an annual one, lasting just over a week, which involved seeking out eight different people one had wronged in one's lifetime in order to make amends. And Gippal was Rikku's number 5, gosh-dammit!

"Oh Poopie…" Rikku whispered to herself as she rounded the corner onto the beach. She could see Gippal all right. Just as she'd been told by Aurochs she'd passed on the way down, he had taken Paine down to the pier, where they now sat, unbearably close, with their legs dangling into the water below them.

In the moonlight, Paine looked even more beautiful than ever, and Rikku wondered if it was jealousy that constricted her heart so as she hung back and watched them both. She was gorgeous, and she had a whole history with Gippal that Rikku herself would never know about. …So was she jealous? She'd always liked Gippal, so it would be natural, wouldn't it? For her to be jealous...?

And yet that wasn't it.

In fact, as she crept closer through the sound-muffling sand, the gentle curve of Paine's jaw even brought an unwilling smile to Rikku's face. Unexplainably, she felt the urge to sit where Gippal sat then—so close—and to reach out… He was close enough. Rikku wondered how he kept himself from extending a hand to touch her cheek. She wasn't sure if even she could…

Breathing in deeply, Rikku forced herself to approach, even as her earlier anger began to melt away.

"Are you sure nothing went on between you guys two years ago?" she wheedled cheekily, making her presence known, and she took a brief sort of delight in the way Gippal jumped, and had to feign scratching his head to disguise the movement from behind.

"Hey, Cid's girl. I didn't think you'd be up," he chuckled, a little awkwardly, as he stood. "I would've come said 'hi'."

Rikku narrowed her eyes slightly at the nickname, but nodded. "What'cha doing out here on the pier getting all lovey-dovey with Dr P?" she pouted, and this time a look of genuine confusion passed over Gippal's face as he glanced down at Paine.

"She don't know, P?" he laughed lightly.

Rikku couldn't see Paine's face—she still sat with her back to her, looking out to sea—but she didn't miss the brief quiver of her shoulders in the half-light of the moon.

"Know what?" Rikku whined, and when Paine sought neither to explain herself, nor to prevent him from doing so for her, Gippal shook his head.

"Paine's a lesbian," he told her simply.

And for some reason or other, the words impacted Rikku more than she'd ever have suspected they could, and she found herself in a rare, if brief, state of speechlessness. Eventually, though, she had to ask—as though she might somehow have mistaken his frank confession—"You… like girls, Paine?"

As if after a lifetime of silence, Paine turned to glance up at Rikku over her shoulder. "You have a problem with that?"

Her voice was its usual unwavering monotone, but Rikku detected a flash in her eyes that was unfamiliar and startling. Unsettled, she shook her head vigorously. "You just never said," she murmured, a little hurt.

Paine stood now. "You never asked," she replied plainly, and with a hand raised in parting toward Gippal she left without another word. Just as silently, Gippal followed, leaving Rikku alone on the pier in her confusion.

She sighed deeply.

"Oh poopie…"

There had been several times when Paine could have told her that she was gay, Rikku told herself, attempting to reason away her shock… and that other naggling feeling that had overcome her since the revelation. When she'd asked about she and Nooj—when she'd taunted her, teased her about him—she could have ended it in an instant.

"I'm gay."

It would have been that simple.

So why hadn't she?

This was the question that Rikku feared the most. Was it just the older woman's stubborn pride, or her characteristic detachedness that had prevented her from telling her? Was it just that Paine had never been one to share details of her private life with anyone? …Or was it something more sinister? Did Paine really not feel that she could trust Rikku? Did she expect her to react badly? Worse still—had she reacted badly? In Paine's eyes?

In the darkness of the night it had been difficult to judge Paine's reaction to Gippal's revelation, but now, standing beneath the dim lights that illuminated Besaid Temple by night, Rikku imagined a single tear rolling down her friend's cheek—unseen. Of course, unseen. And who really knew what went on inside Paine's head, anyway? Behind her walls?

Hugging herself against the cold breeze, Rikku tried to picture it. She tried to picture Paine engaged in a tender, emotional kiss with another woman. Yet the image eluded her.

What sort of woman would Paine go for, she wondered. And how would she express her feelings? Relationships had never been Paine's strong point after all… But maybe that was unfair.

Alone now, Rikku allowed herself to admit that, despite her withdrawn nature, Paine had always been a true and loyal friend to her. She may have been quiet, she may not have told her everything she ever wanted to know… but when it counted, she was there. She was always ready and willing to help, in her own way—her gentle logic perfectly complementing Rikku's own buoyant spirit of adventure.

And for a second, Rikku found herself imagining just what it would be like to be on the receiving end of that tender, emotional kiss. She imagined the gentle flutter of Paine's eyelids as they closed, the softness of her lips as they opened, and the gentle touch of one of those black silk-gloved hands on her cheek.

And then she gasped.

It had been too easy—far too easy—and, despite herself, Rikku was frightened. Immediately she tried to change the subject but her mind was hooked. The kiss replayed itself again and again in her mind, each time a tiny bit longer, a tiny bit clearer, sending a tiny bit more heat rushing to her core and to her cheeks until suddenly they were blazing red and she had begun to cry in frustration.

Crouched on the cobbled stone steps of the temple, her head down to her knees, Rikku didn't notice Gippal approaching until he was beside her, stroking her back, and without looking up, she pillowed into him—desperate to feel his hard, masculine form supporting her—…and yet inside a yearning had been struck up for something softer and she had a sudden vision of the creamy white of Paine's skin in the moonlight.

Helplessly, Rikku let all her tears out into Gippal's shoulder, pouring like rain down her cheeks for a reason she couldn't yet begin to fathom herself. All she knew was that, out of nowhere, it felt like her world had been turned upside down. Yevon knew why it should, but it did. Indeed, for whatever reason, Paine's sexuality appeared to be having a somewhat traumatic effect on poor Rikku, and Gippal was sympathetic, but certainly not blind, to it.

Eventually she forced herself to breathe and pulled away, wiping her eyes on her arm. It was freezing by then, but she scooted a couple of inches away from Gippal and shook her head apologetically as she rubbed her arms up and down for heat.

"I—I'm sorry for never supporting you when you wanted to be a Crusader. I'm sorry for being happy when they told you we Al Bheds weren't welcome in their Yevonite army. I'm sorry for resenting you for going off to join the Crimson Squad two years ago instead of staying home with me, like I guess I always thought you would… I'm sorry—"

"Rikku, that's enough," Gippal whispered, taking her back into his arms gently. "I know."

"But it's the 'Eight Days of Repentence,'" Rikku whispered, explaining herself. "And I really wanted you to be here so I could— so I could tell you—"

"I know," Gippal repeated. "But you have nothing to be sorry for."

Rikku sniffed again and shook her head, but allowed herself to be embraced by Gippal in silence for a short while.

"I want to talk to you about Paine," he admitted eventually, pulling back to look into her eyes, and Rikku felt her heart flutter.

"I—I don't know why I'm crying," she whispered. "It's not that I— I don't think there's anything wrong…"

"Don't tell me you're crying because you actually wanted me and Paine to get together?" Gippal joked, the reappearance of his trademark grin causing laughter to bubble helplessly from Rikku.

"No, that's not it," she laughed weakly. "I don't know what it is… Don't tell Paine I was crying, okay? I don't want her to think I'm upset, or that I don't support her."

"I don't think Paine thinks that," Gippal replied, shrugging. "But maybe you should tell her… Rikku, what's wrong? Your face just turned white?"

Rikku merely shook her head dazedly. "I don't know… I don't know if I can talk to her," she whispered, and then shook her head again, more frantically at the disbelieving look on Gippal's face. "Not because—!" She breathed in deeply here. "Not because… But really because…" She glanced up at him helplessly, willing him, with her wide, green eyes, to understand what she couldn't say. …Typically, he was clueless. "I don't know why," Rikku went on finally, in a dangerously quiet whisper Gippal strained to hear, "But thinking of Paine like that… I— I thought about kissing her."

Gippal watched seriously as Rikku breathed in deeply and awaited his response, aware of the delicate state his dear little friend was in. "When you say you thought about 'kissing' her…" he began slowly, carefully, "Do you mean…?"

"I mean really kissing her, Gippal," Rikku replied, more firmly now that she'd got it off her chest. "I was walking around here—too awake and too shocked, I guess, to go to sleep—and I was thinking, and when I was thinking… Well, I tried to imagine Paine doing that, y'know? And then the next thing I knew I was imagining us… doing… that…"

"It could be that you're just shocked, Rikku, or even a little curious…?"

"I know, but…" Rikku breathed in deeply again here and looked up at Gippal earnestly. "The way I felt when I pictured it… And it wouldn't go away— The picture I had— So gentle… Because you can tell her lips are so soft, just like her skin. Her skin is so smooth, isn't it Gippal? In the moon tonight it looked like she was made of eggshells. When I saw you two… I wondered how you could resist reaching out to touch it. And I… The spot beneath her ear, on her jawline…? I wanted to rest my hand there and feel her pulse, and then run my thumb down her jaw to her… Her lips looked so soft…"

Rikku blinked dazedly at the images that plagued her once again, but instead of shaking her out of it Gippal watched her dream—the gentle, satisfied look on her face was something new to him. She had such a tender look about her that he didn't want to disturb her… But it was late, and she was clearly cold, and so Gippal touched her arm gently.

"Cid's girl, time for bed," he called quietly. "You're exhausted. Your mind is playing tricks on you."

"Do you think that's all it is?" Rikku wondered, a little hopefully, as she allowed Gippal to help her to her feet, and he considered her a moment before answering.

"…Don't you?"

Rikku bit her lip gently and shook her head, then nodded, then shook her head again. "I don't know… I— Gippal, I don't know. I've never wanted so much to just reach out and touch someone… It's such a strange compulsion, but it feels like it's coming from somewhere deep inside me. It feels… real."

Gippal's brow furrowed slightly as he brushed Rikku's hair back to kiss her forehead. "Go to bed," he repeated gently. "Tomorrow you can think back on all of this in the light of day."

Rikku nodded slowly, then paused. "Tomorrow…" she repeated. "I've got three more days of the repentence festival."

"Who else have you got in mind?" Gippal asked, walking her up to the door of the hut she shared with Yuna and Paine on the island.

"Uhm… Lulu, Yuna… and Paine," Rikku replied, biting her lip lightly.

"See Lulu tomorrow," Gippal advised immediately. "Repent to her, or whatever you're supposed to do, and then ask her advice. She's a mum now. Mum's are good at that sort of thing."

Blinking up at him in surprise, Rikku felt a smile spreading across her face as she leaned up to kiss his cheek goodnight. "Thanks, Gippal," she told him. "You've helped me a lot."

Gippal shook his head and grinned in response. "Hey, don't worry about it," he replied genuinely. "Sweet dreams now… Cid's girl."