AN –This is the second part of Breaking The News. You should read that before reading this. I take no credit for the whole cupcake reference...well you'll see. It's something I heard before and I thought it was hilarious. I hope you guys think so too. Happy Reading!
Thanks to Tori for beta'ing for me. Also thanks to her for helping me with the title along with Rad and Kelly. You girlies RocK!
Disclaimer-I own none of these character. They are all property of the writers and creators of One Tree Hill.
Did You Eat The Baby, Mama?
"Oh my god" Nathan said flopping exhaustedly into the bed next to his wife. "Please tell me that that conversation just didn't happen, that I didn't sound like a complete jackass tonight trying to explain to our son where babies come from?"
Haley giggled turning to her side to face him. She brought her tiny hand in comfort soothing over his tired face. "I wasn't expecting that" she admitted with a smile. "Here we are worried about him accepting the baby and we're totally unprepared for the really big question" she laughed.
Nathan chuckled letting his lips brush the back of her hand in a small kiss. "I swear Hales, I nearly swallowed my tongue when he asked us. He is really too damn smart for his own good. He definitely gets that from you" Nathan complimented.
"And you" Haley said. "He has a pretty smart daddy too. Never underestimate yourself, baby."
"Yeah well I didn't feel too smart tonight" he said. "I thought we had time before this conversation would take place…I mean I was expecting this talk way, way, way down the line, Hales" he emphasized shooting his arms outward. "I imagine it's hard enough going into that awkward territory with your teenage child. But what do you say to someone not even in the first grade?"
"You could have just told him the truth" Haley said trying to keep herself from bursting out into laughter looking at Nathan's shocked face.
"What?!" he yelled. "Are you serious?"
"Of course, I mean they say honesty is the best policy" she said continuing to yank his chain. "Maybe you could have told him about all the hot sex mama and daddy have while he's sleeping in the next room " she joked before laughing loudly at Nathan. He had sat up against the headboard trying to grasp what she was saying before he watched her crumble into a gut busting laughter.
"Nice baby. I thought you were serious" he said while shaking his head at her silliness.
"You should have seen your face. I wish I had a camera" she teased grabbing his face with both of her hands and kissing him softly. He moaned feeling her soft velvety lips caress slowly against his.
"That wasn't nice" he mumbled as the kiss broke.
"I know. You love me though" she said confidently.
"That I do" Nathan said.
"You have to admit that it was funny" she laughed.
Nathan covered Haley's body pinning her to the bed and began tickling her crazily making her squeal with laughter into the calm quiet of the night.
"Now what's funny?" he said.
"Stop it Nathan" she pleaded between laughs. "You'll make me wake the neighbors. I'll wake Jamie" she tried, but Nathan continued letting his fingers work against the exposed area of her tummy sticking out from the tank top she wore. Luckily for him that was Haley's most ticklish spot, so it was easy to make her go crazy.
"I give Nathan" she laughed. "Please, I'll never tease you again."
"You promise?" he asked looking into her eyes with a huge smirk plastered on his face.
"I promise" she said crossing her fingers secretly behind her back.
"Good" he said bringing their lips together in another kiss to seal the deal. "Hmm, you taste good."
"Get off me" Haley playfully pushed. "That's why I'm pregnant now" she laughed. "You keep your paws to yourself mister."
"Aw come on, Hales. We could have so much fun. You know you want to" he said cocking his head to the side. He wanted to laugh when he saw her begin to squirm and look everywhere but at him. The sexy smile that Haley always found so hard to resist was now planted on his face with confidence knowing he was having an affect on her.
"The only thing I want is sleep" she said sticking her tongue out taunting him and gaining back full control of the situation. "Besides we wouldn't want to stick another candle in the cupcake " she said bursting out laughing.
Nathan blew out another loud breath falling back against the bed and covering his embarrassed face. There wasn't much that could embarrass Nathan or even make him the slightest bit shy, but having 'the talk' with Jaime definitely made him feel slightly outside of his comfort zone.
"You're just full of laughter tonight, honey" he mocked. "I'll never live this down."
"Aw sweetie, I'm sorry" she said in her best baby voice. Nathan couldn't resist that. "It's the baby's fault I'm giggly" she said trying to divert the blame elsewhere.
"Hales, I'm shocked. Blaming our innocent baby on your childish ways. That's just wrong."
"It's the truth" Haley swore giving her best innocent look so that he would believe what she was saying.
"Sure it is" he finally said after studying her angelic face. Haley had a way of making anyone believe that she was innocent, even if she wasn't.
"You're making this worse then it really was. You have to admit it was priceless though" she snorted hard from the continuous pleasure she was getting from this. Covering her mouth trying to choke back the sounds coming from her, she received a curious look from her husband. "I'm telling you, Jaime didn't know anything was out of the ordinary. You did a good job" she snickered.
"Can I go on record for that being the dumbest shit ever out of my mouth" he said while Haley's laughs continued. She loved when he felt self-induced insecurities. It was like the ultimate revenge on the cockiest son of a bitch she knew. "I know you're loving this. Aren't you?" he asked peaking between the slits of his fingers that were covering his eyes.
Haley giggled giving him a little nod.
"Stupid, stupid, stupid" Nathan said sighing heavily and smacking himself upside the head repeatedly.
"It wasn't that bad" Haley said. "I mean I got it."
"Gee, thanks" Nathan glared to his right to see a smiling Haley, all the while making a mental note to prepare himself for future conversations with Jamie. They had to go a lot better than this one did. Thank god for Haley. She had pulled him from the cliff before he had a chance to jump into a never-ending drop of confusion. He wasn't even sure where he was going with the words once they started coming out. It was just endless babbling about cupcakes and ingredients mixing together or some crap he was trying to make sense of. He was bound to not only confuse Jaime, but himself as well.
"How did it get there?" Jaime asked.
His parents looked wide eye and dumbfounded at each other and back to the small person in front of them. They were not expecting that question nor were they the smallest bit prepared for it. Gulp!
Jaime waited patiently for a response as both his parents looked a bit panicked and lost for words.
"Well" he said. "How did the baby get in mama's stomach? I want to know."
"Um.." Haley said trying to stall as much as possible. She desperately tried thinking of appropriate ways to explain to a five year old how babies came to be without being to detailed.
"Did you eat the baby, mama?" he asked getting impatience and with some concern in his words. His mom couldn't swallow a baby….could she? That was what happened when you ate something, it went in your belly. Maybe that was it. At least that's what made sense inside of his little brain. Neither one of his parents were making a move to tell him so he kept trying to figure it out for himself. He was after all a very intelligent boy, everyone always told him so.
"No" Haley laughed. "Mama didn't eat the baby" she said.
"I don't understand" Jaime said becoming frustrated. "Daddy?" he said turning his attention to Nathan. "Please tell me" he begged pitifully.
How could they resist that face? Jaime had control over them like you wouldn't believe. Their little boy not yet capable of fully understanding the powers he possessed over his parents. One look and Jaime got whatever his little heart desired.
But this is what they got for encouraging Jaime to be a child who asked questions. They had instilled inside him at a very young age to ask something if you didn't know or understand. They wanted him to be always knowledgeable in life regardless of any situation. Of course now it would be coming back to take a big huge bite out of both of their butts.
Nathan ran a nervous hand through his spiked hair. He looked around the room sort of at a loss before his eyes landed on the cake in front of him.
"Cake" he whispered.
"What?" Haley and Jaime both asked.
"Cake" Nathan said louder. "You know cupcakes, Jaime."
"A baby is like a cupcake?" he asked confused.
Haley's eyes burned into Nathan wondering where exactly was he about to go with this. He looked to her hunching his shoulders up, cluing Haley into the fact that he was winging it as he went. She decided to just sit back and let him take the reigns of the conversation. This would be good….or at least nice entertainment and reason for a good laugh.
"Not exactly" Nathan chuckled.
"Oh" Jaime responded.
"So you know how you like to help mama bake cupcakes because it's like one of your favorite things to do?" Nathan asked trying to make some sort of connection that Jaime could comprehend.
"Yeah" Jaime said. "We have fun. Mama lets me put the eggs and sugar in" he excitedly said. But what did that have to do with how a baby was in Haley's stomach?
"Well that's how the baby is sort of made" Nathan explained. "It takes all these things mixed all together to make a baby inside of mommy."
"Like what?" Jaime pressed.
"Things that you are too young to understand, little man" he told him.
"Did you have to eat sugar and eggs, mama?" he asked turning towards Haley.
"No sweetie" she said. "What daddy means is that you need all these ingredients….grown up ingredients" she tried to clarify "before you can make a baby."
"When two people like your mama and I love each other, they want to show that love. They use the ingredients to make their baby. It only should be used when you are in love, buddy."
Nathan knew that better than anyone. He had often wished he would have waited, he wished that Haley would have been the only girl he had ever been with so intimately. Over time he became fine with knowing he wasn't exactly a boy scout prior to Haley. She had given him a whole new perspective on the situation saying that it really was his first time when they were together. With all those other girls it had been strictly about sex and nothing else, no emotional attachment. He had never truly made love until Haley. It was a world of difference.
"But there is a rule that says you're not allowed to have those special ingredients until you are a certain age, an older age" Nathan said.
"A much older age" Haley said making that point very clear. "Preferably when mama is dead and buried or too senile to know" she rambled running her hand over Jaime's back. The thought of her baby boy having sex one day was not a thought she wanted running through her mind. To her Jaime would always be a sweet, little, pure five year old.
Jaime just frowned completely puzzled over anything his mother was saying.
Nathan just rolled his eyes at his wife's comments. He figured she would always see Jaime as their little boy no matter how old he got.
"I think I get it" Jaime said. "It's like the cupcakes. Mama says you can't forget anything of the things or they'll be ruined, just like the baby" he asked looking for confirmation from his parents.
"That's right baby boy" Haley said. "The baby is sort of cooking inside of mommy, just like the cupcakes do in the oven. When it's ready the baby will come out of the mama oven."
"When it's ready? That's so funny" Jaime giggled. His brother or sister was cooking inside of his mommy.
"It is kind of funny" Nathan said. "Think of it this way, after the cupcake is done we can put a candle in it." Nathan had no clue what he meant by that, it had sort just slipped out.
Haley did her best to suppress a laugh. Nathan eyed her with raised brows seeing her amused face.
"You want to stick a candle in mama?" Jaime asked with wide eyes.
Haley could no longer take it. The laughter came out in big cackles vibrating against their dining room walls. Nathan and Jaime both looked to her with different expressions on their faces, one filled with mere confusion, and the other plastered with a look a payback on his mind. He could tell by the look in Haley's eye, her mind had wandered to somewhere deep down in the gutter.
"I'm sorry" she laughed trying to gather some composure. Her hands were on her chest holding it as her body shook violently, tears were spilling from her eyes as she laughed so hard at the expense of her mortified looking husband. Nathan looked as if he wanted to crawl inside of the darkest hole he could find after that comment.
"No candle in mama, baby. I think daddy just meant that as a joke" she told him. "Right honey?" she asked looking to Nathan for support. This was the best possible way to get around trying to further explaining things to Jaime. This baby conversation needed to be over quick, fast, and in a hurry.
"Ri…. right" Nathan stuttered somewhat. "A joke. Ha!, ha!" Nathan said with a smile to assure his son.
"Ok" Jaime accepted being over it all. "Can I go play now?" he asked.
"Sure buddy" Nathan said. "Just go and wash your face and hands first before you touch anything." Jaime had still been covered in chocolate icing almost everywhere but his hair.
"I will daddy" he promised. Jaime went beside his mother allowing her to kiss all over his little face.
" Oh look at you all sticky" she laughed when some of the frosting got on her face. Jaime giggled letting her wipe over him once with a near dishtowel. "We love you, baby" she said continuing to kiss him.
"Love you too" he said before making his way out of her arms towards the bathroom, leaving his parents alone.
Nathan stood up from his bent position feeling completely wiped and exhausted. His back towards her, he felt Haley come behind him and begin to massage the knots right out of his stressed body.
"Is this your apology?" he asked with a sexy tone.
"It depends" she said.
"On what might I ask?" he said.
"If I am forgiven" she said applying more pressure over his shoulders.
Nathan's head fell to the side feeling the soft touch of her hands against his skin. He moaned taking her hands with his own and pulling Haley around to the front of him. She naturally found her way into the safe warmth of his arms where she laid her head onto his hard chest.
"You're forgiven" he mumbled into her hair where part of his face was buried. He kissed her on the top of her head a few times before guiding her eyes to meet his. "I love you, Hales" he said out of the blue.
It was moments like these that Haley loved the most. Moments when he would
profess his love for no reason at all, just because.
"I love you too" she said with a dreamy sigh.
"It was a pretty good night" Haley said tucking her body more into his as they lay in their bed together.
"A traumatic night" Nathan said with a chuckle.
"You're a good dad. You did just fine" she said.
"Hmm" Nathan mumbled. "If you say so."
"I do" she said kissing his cheek.
"Night Hales" he said wrapping her tightly in his embrace.
"Good night my little cupcake" Haley yawned tiredly with one last giggle as she heard Nathan groan in response to her last dig at him.
Before long the day was whisked away into a world of unconscious bliss as they both fell into a peaceful content slumber right in each other's arms. With the prospect of their new baby floating through the air, it was a new exciting adjustment for every member of the Scott family. One that they were all definitely looking forward too, and was sure would provide each and every one of them with unlimited happiness in their already happy world.
THE END!
PLEASE REVIEW!