The Shinsengumi compound was quiet; its rooms and courtyard uncharacteristically still. Hijikata noted the peace with satisfaction. The Choshu had been reserved lately, and the day was too hot for any but the most vigilant to be training. The true blessing, however, was that the Ichimura brat was gone. He was probably off with the fools who called themselves the "comedian trio," or perhaps with Sannan. Where Ichimura was didn't matter, as long Hijikata didn't have to deal with him. Not even Hijikata's annoyance at the boy for shirking his duties could ruin his appreciation for the peace and quiet. Yes, Hijikata though, it was the kind of day where he could indulge in just a bit of relaxation- maybe even write some poetry. He'd hidden his notebook in a new place, a better place, one where Souji wouldn't find it. He didn't want any repeats of that… incident.
As Hijikata made his way through the yard, he heard the sound of someone eating. Messily. He turned a corner and found Souji wolfing down a huge watermelon, his clothes soaked with juice. His face and hands were sticky, and seeds littered the ground. The young man made an absolutely ridiculous sight. "Souji," Hijikata said, irritated. "Do you have any idea how filthy you look?" Souji looked up at him as if he had only just noticed the Hijikata was there, which was ridiculous. Souji was far too perceptive for that.
"I can't help it, Hijikata-san." Souji replied cheerfully. "Eating watermelon is a messy thing to do." He grinned as Hijikata glared.
"It doesn't have to be that messy. You should know better."
Souji pouted. "Mou, Hijikata-san, there's no need to get so upset. It will wash right off." Hijikata rubbed his temple. Sometimes he didn't even know why he bothered- Souji could be so foolish. Then again, a small part of his mind asked him, isn't it better for Souji to be silly, rather than too serious? After everything he has seen and done, isn't it a good thing that this part of him is still alive?
Hijikata sighed. "Just don't get juice on the engawa, and make sure you clean yourself up later."
Souji beamed. "Of course, Hijikata-san." Hijikata snorted.
"I'll be in my room." He shook his head, turning to walk away.
"All right," Souji chirped. "You should write some haiku while you're in there. Your new work is much better. You're definitely improving." Hijikata stopped in his tracks, and clenched his fists tightly, his whole body rigid. He could feel his blood begin to boil.
Kill Souji. Yes, kill Souji, then hide the body. It was a perfect plan. But, no, no, the Shinsengumi needed its first captain. He had to maintain control. Control was necessary. He didn't even turn around. He just stomped away, trying to think of a new place to hide his notebook, a new place, a better place, a place that was Souji proof.
Souji watched Hijikata storm off, then smiled wider and went back to eating his watermelon. Really, he thought, chuckling, what would Hijikata-san do without me?
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Author's notes: A story this inane needs a bit of an explanation. Another fanfic author mentioned a while ago that she thought that many titles of PMK stories were overdramatic and cliché. She said that she would like to see a story simply called something like "Souji Eats a Watermelon." I couldn't resist writing it.
Japanese terms:
Mou- An exclamation. Sort of like "come on" or "jeez"
Engawa- A wrap-around porch