Aragorn

Unwilling to wait, Aragorn ran the last few steps. "Legolas! It's so good to see you." He threw his arms around his best friend, hugging him tightly.

"It has been too long, Estel." Legolas didn't seem to want to let go of him, which was to Aragorn's liking.

"Ah, I missed my name. I should never have told my college that my name is Aragorn."

"It is."

"Yes, but everyone I care about calls me by my second name. Ada is certainly better at coming up with names than my birth father."

Legolas chuckled lightly. "Still calling your father Ada, I see. That must have confused your friends at college."

"It's not my fault I struggled to pronounce the 'd' sound when I was younger." Aragorn was grinning broadly. It had been far too long since he'd seen Legolas. They'd both been hesitant about going to separate colleges after they finished school, let alone ones in different states, but in the end they both agreed to chose what was best for their individual careers and stay in contact.

Only Legolas hadn't stayed in contact, at least not as much as Aragorn would have liked. The few phone calls and emails they'd exchanged weren't enough for him. Aragorn knew his friend was busy, but he missed him terribly, and had finally put his foot down. It was the holidays now, and he had flown to Legolas, since Legolas refused to come to him. He'd never known his friend not to want to see him before, and it had him worried.

He finally pulled back and got a good look at the blond. Aragorn frowned. "Are you ok, Legolas? You're not sick, are you?"

"No, why?"

"You've lost so much weight! That doesn't look healthy, Las."

"I'm fine, Estel."

Aragorn pursed his lips, but didn't push the matter. He knew that it wouldn't help; Legolas could be unbearably stubborn at times.

"Come on, come inside. I'm renting this place for the summer, and I've got it to myself. I can tell you, it's better than having to share a dorm room with someone."

Legolas led him into a small apartment. Aragorn threw himself onto the couch, and Legolas tried to sit next to him, but the brunette wasn't having that. He grabbed his friend around the waist, pulling Legolas down on top of him.

"I haven't seen you in a year, you're not getting away from me now."

Legolas laughed and fell easily into him. He was so much lighter than Aragorn remembered, and it worried him. Putting his concerns aside for now, he started tickling his friend. Legolas squealed and tried to pull away, but Aragorn quickly outmaneuvered him, pulling the blond's shirt up to get better access to his stomach.

He realized he'd stopped tickling when Legolas pulled his shirt down, but not before the brunette saw his ribs, which were sticking out painfully over his sunken stomach.

"Las? Talk to me."

"I'm fine, Estel, I have everything under control. Stop worrying so much."

"You look like you've been starved! Have you been eating?"

"Of course I've been eating."

That wasn't good enough for Aragorn, and he strode over to the fridge. It was fully stocked, at least, and he grabbed an apple.

"Here." He sat down next to Legolas and handed him the fruit. "Eat this, now."

"I'm not hungry at the moment. How about we go for a run?"

"A run? Since when have you liked running?"

"Well, my college doesn't offer archery like school did, and I wanted to keep fit. I've gotten into it."

Exercise was probably the last thing Legolas needed in his current state, but he knew he wasn't going to persuade the blond otherwise, at least not right now.

"Fine, I'll go for a run with you, but afterward, we're coming back here, and we're going to talk."

"Of course."

"I don't just mean catching up, Las, I mean talk properly about what's bothering you."

Legolas' face fell. "It's under control, Estel."

"You will tell me regardless." Aragorn levelled his friend with a stern gaze, but Legolas wouldn't meet his eyes.

"I'll go get changed."

Legolas pointed Aragorn to the room he'd be staying in for the several weeks he was visiting. Aragorn quickly got dressed in shorts and a t-shirt, meeting Legolas at the front door.

"Do you have a route you like to use?"

"I do. Just follow me."

It soon became apparent that Legolas had been running often. Aragorn thought of himself as reasonably fit, but by the third kilometer, he was struggling to keep up. Legolas maintained an ambitious pace, with Aragorn several steps behind. He watched his friend worriedly. Legolas was starting to sway, and his hands were trembling slightly.

Just as Aragorn was sure the blond would collapse, Legolas veered off to the side and quickly sat down on a bench, breathing hard.

"Hey, you alright?" Legolas looked like he was about to pass out, and Aragorn put a supportive arm around his back.

"I'm fine, just a bit dizzy. Always happens."

"You're not supposed to get dizzy when you run."

Legolas shrugged, taking several deep breaths. "Ok, you ready to go?"

He was slightly steadier as they set off again, but Aragorn kept close by him. Soon enough, Legolas started to stagger a little.

"Maybe we should stop…"

"It's fine – bench – just up there."

As Aragorn expected, they didn't make it to the bench. Legolas stumbled and went down, his legs completely giving out. Aragorn managed to catch him, but the blond immediately pulled out of his grip. "Leave me, Estel!"

Aragorn reluctantly let go, and Legolas sat down on the ground, putting his head between his knees. The whole thing looked far too practiced for the brunette's liking. He crouched down next to Legolas.

"Las, you have to talk to me. Please."

"I have it under control, Estel. I'll be ok to continue in a minute."

"Continue? We're not going to continue, you just collapsed! I'm still deciding whether to take you home or to the hospital."

"No, I don't need to go to hospital!"

Aragorn sighed. "Fine, but then we're taking a taxi back to your apartment."

"Estel, I don't need –"

"This is non-negotiable, Las." Aragorn folded his arms and did his best impression of his father's 'no nonsense' look, the one Elrond used on particularly stubborn patients.

"Fine," Legolas sighed.

He seemed to get some strength back, and was able to get into the cab by himself. When they got to the apartment, Aragorn quickly led his friend to the kitchen and started pulling food out of the fridge. He tossed an apple over to Legolas.

"Here, eat this for while I cook. It'll take the pasta a few minutes, and I think you need something right now."

To his relief, Legolas nodded. Aragorn was half way through cooking pasta when he glanced back. "Legolas, you said you were going to eat the apple!"

"I did." The blond turned the apple slightly to reveal that a tiny slice had been cut off it, no more than a finger's width.

Aragorn stared at him, wondering if this was a joke. "You just collapsed while running, and you think that's an acceptable amount to eat? You need a lot more than that."

"No, this is plenty."

Aragorn's heart sank as the pieces started to fall into place. The obsessive exercise, extreme thinness, refusing to eat… how had he not noticed that his best friend had developed an eating disorder?

He finished cooking the pasta and dished himself a plate, sitting next to Legolas and giving his friend a much smaller serving.

"Please, try to eat a bit more," he said softly.

Predictably, Legolas shook his head.

Aragorn sighed. "Are you seeing someone?"

"No, I would have told you. Besides, I'd rather just focus on school for now before I think about a relationship."

"That's not what I meant, Las. Are you seeing someone for your eating problem?"

Fear flickered over Legolas' face for a moment before he quickly covered it with a blank expression. "I don't have an eating problem. I'm fine. Everything is under control."

"Why do you keep saying that?"

"What?"

"That you have things under control?"

Legolas looked at him as though doubting his intelligence. "Because I do."

"No, I mean when did control become so important to you?"

"I – I struggled at first, but really, there's nothing to worry about."

"What do you mean, you struggled?"

Legolas shrugged. "Being away from home and everyone I knew was tough. I'm not like you, Estel, I can't just jump into a new situation and thrive immediately."

Aragorn almost laughed. "You think that's what happened? I struggled too, Las, how could I not? Of course it's going to be hard; our whole lives have changed."

"It was difficult for you as well?"

"When my brothers found out, they basically moved into my dorm room. Ada had to rent an apartment for my roommate to stay in, and I almost got kicked out when the residence manager found Arwen with me after hours. Fortunately, I managed to explain she's my sister, but it was a close thing."

Legolas chuckled. "I can imagine."

"I wish you'd told me how much you were struggling," Aragorn said softly. "You never indicated anything like this in any of your emails or calls. I would have been on the first plane here."

"That's exactly why I didn't tell you, Estel. I won't have you throwing away your education for me."

"You're more important, you know that. Now, we need to discuss how best to help you. I'll call Ada and ask if he knows any eating disorder specialists in this area –"

"No, no, Estel, stop it! I don't need any of that. I'm fine, it's –"

"If you say 'under control', I'm going to drag you to hospital right now, I swear, Legolas. You haven't got this under control, it's completely taken over! You're way underweight, Las, dangerously so, even I can see that."

"I'm fine. I won't see anyone. You can't make me." Legolas folded his arms and gave the brunette a mulish look.

"You want to play it that way? Alright, I'll give you two options. One, you let me help you. Two… I'll call your father."

Legolas paled. "You wouldn't."

"I would. He'd be on the first plane here, and he'd have you booked into an inpatient program by day's end. What's more, he'd call Elrond, who would no doubt also rush over, probably with the twins and Arwen too. We all care about you, Las."

"You – you can't…"

Aragorn quickly moved to his friend's side. Legolas was gripping the table and breathing way too fast.

"Slow it down, Las. Just breathe slowly. You're having a panic attack, you have to control your breathing."

He grabbed the blond's hands, squeezing tightly. "You're ok, just slow down."

"Can't – dad – don't –" Legolas could barely get the words out between his panicked gasps.

"I won't call him as long as you agree to see someone about this. I'm trying to help you, Las, not hurt you. There's nothing to be worried about."

It seemed this was the wrong tactic to calm Legolas, because the blond pressed his hands to his face as he started crying. Aragorn quickly gathered his friend into his arms, practically pulling Legolas onto his lap. Legolas was so light, he barely weighed anything.

"Shh, just breathe, just breathe," Aragorn murmured. At first, he thought Legolas was going to fight him – he'd never been good at showing any kind of weakness – but it seemed that his friend was simply too overwhelmed to worry about that. Legolas curled into him, his head pressed into Aragorn's chest.

Aragorn hugged him close, murmuring words of comfort, urging him to slow down. Eventually, the hyperventilation gave way to relatively normal breathing, albeit disturbed by sobs. He'd never seen Legolas cry like this, and it broke Aragorn's heart. He should have been here. He should have done something sooner.

Slowly, Legolas' tears calmed, but he remained huddled in Aragorn's lap, not looking like he intended on moving any time soon, which was fine with the brunette.

"Tell me what you're thinking," he urged.

"I – I'm scared," Legolas admitted. "If we bring someone else into this… they'll try to make me change. I don't want to lose control."

"I know, which is why I'm not going to insist on an inpatient program at this point, but you have to realize that you need help, Las."

"It doesn't feel like I do. It feels like I have everything under control. It's perfect."

"Maybe it doesn't feel like you need help, but you have to know this can't continue. You're doing serious damage to your body like this, Las."

"I know," Legolas admitted. "I guess I try not to think about the passing out and the dizziness too much."

"I understand. You're afraid, and you've had no one to help you, but that's going to change."

Tears were leaking out of Legolas' eyes again. "I'm sorry, Estel," he whispered, wrapping his arms tightly around Aragorn's waist. "I should have told you earlier."

"Well I know now, and that's all that matters. You look exhausted, Las. Why don't you go lie down, and I'll start calling around. We'll want to get you the best specialist there is."

Legolas shook his head, his arms tightening even further.

"What is it?"

"Could… could you just stay with me for a bit? I haven't really made any friends here. I've missed you."

"Of course, Las. Though I still want you to lie down. Come on, show me your room."

Aragorn tucked Legolas in and sat on the edge of the bed, but the blond held out his arms pleadingly, like a child asking for a hug, looking very young in that moment.

Without needing to ask, Aragorn slipped into bed with him. Legolas immediately cuddled up to him, half lying on the brunette's chest. He gripped his friend's arm in alarm when Legolas started shaking with sobs again.

"Las? What's wrong?"

Legolas shook his head. "I don't know," he wailed, clutching Aragorn's shirt. "I w-was – f-fine – under – c-control before – you g-g-got here."

"You're in pain," Aragorn said softly. "That you've managed to keep it locked away inside you this long doesn't mean it wasn't there. Just let it out, Las. I am here, and I will help you."

Legolas curled even closer to him, as though trying to crawl inside Aragorn's skin. His friend was freezing, and Aragorn pulled up an extra blanket. Legolas desperately needed to put on some weight. Eventually, Las cried himself out and fell asleep, still holding onto Aragorn's waist.

Aragorn got out his phone and started searching for eating disorder specialists. The sooner he got his friend some help, the better.

Legolas

Legolas woke to the familiar, comforting ache in his stomach. He was warmer than he could remember being in a long time, and it took him a moment to remember why. His pillow had been discarded, and he was currently sprawled over Estel's chest.

Oh. Now he remembered.

He'd been so determined to keep his situation under control, but now Estel knew everything, and he'd somehow persuaded Legolas to allow him to 'help'. Legolas was sure his friend's help would include forcing him to eat more, and the very thought had his breathing speeding up.

"Legolas?" Aragorn stirred from the light sleep he'd been in and opened his eyes. "Are you ok?"

Legolas took a deep breath, trying to get himself to calm down. "I don't want to see the specialist."

"I know, but you have to, Las. You need the help. And you're not going to lose control. I've already booked you an appointment with Dr. Johnson, she's going to see you tomorrow. She'll give suggestions, but no one is forcing you to take them."

Legolas snorted. "No one except you, you mean."

Estel shrugged. "If your doctor tells you to do something, of course I'm going to help you do it."

Help, right. More like blackmail him into it. Legolas wouldn't even be seeing the stupid doctor if Estel hadn't threatened to call Thranduil. Still, he found he couldn't be angry at his friend. Estel was just doing his best to help, whether Legolas wanted that help or not.

The light coming in from the window looked like it was early morning – had he really slept the rest of the afternoon and the entire night?

"I haven't slept that well in a while," Legolas murmured. It was so warm and comfortable here, he just wanted to go back to sleep. He'd closed his eyes to do just that when Estel shook him gently.

"You can go back to sleep in a minute, but first, you need to eat breakfast."

"No, Estel," Legolas groaned. "I'm seeing your stupid specialist, you don't get to make me eat as well."

"Just a slice of apple, the same size as the one you had yesterday."

"I went for a run yesterday. Today's should be a quarter of that size."

"Not a chance, Las, and you're not going for another run until the doctor clears you for exercise. Stay here, I'll be right back."

A few minutes later, Estel returned with the apple slice. Legolas took it and stared at it, wishing it would disappear. A piece of fruit shouldn't make him this anxious, but the thought of having to eat it was already making panic spiral through him.

"Hey, come here." Estel pulled him into a tight hug, with Legolas' back resting against the brunette's chest. Estel took the apple and brought it to Legolas' mouth.

"Just this one piece," he coaxed.

"I can't," Legolas gasped, struggling to breathe regularly. "If I don't control what I eat, then things in my head fall apart."

"That's what you're seeing Dr. Johnson for. She's going to help you with that, as will I. You are not alone anymore, Las. I won't let you fall apart. It's ok to eat."

Legolas knew his friend wouldn't give up, and he reluctantly took the apple. Choking it down was harder than he'd expected – it had been a long time since he'd deviated from his home-made eating plan, and it felt like way too much.

He only realized he was crying again when Estel gently started wiping his tears away. "You did well, Las."

"Doesn't feel like it." Legolas burrowed back under the blankets, and Estel's arms came around him, holding him as he cried. He must have cried himself to sleep again, because the next thing he knew, Estel was shaking him awake.

"Legolas, you need to get up. We have to leave for your appointment with Dr. Johnson."

He took as long as he possibly could showering, but apparently, Estel had left time to spare, because they still made it in time for the appointment. They sat in the waiting room for a short time before Dr. Johnson came for them.

"Legolas? This way, please."

Legolas got up, but paused when he realized that Estel had stayed seated. "Estel? You're not coming with me?"

"I'm not allowed. You have to see her alone, but I'll be right here."

"No – I can't do this without you," Legolas hissed, trying to control his rapidly rising panic.

Estel quickly got up and put an arm around him. "It's ok, Las, I'll be right out here. I'll tell you what, you try seeing her alone, but if you really need me, come get me, or shout, I'm close enough to hear you. Ok?"

"Ok," Legolas agreed uncertainly.

Estel gave him a comforting hug, and Legolas followed Dr. Johnson to her office.

"Was that your brother?"

That got a smile from him. "Might as well be."

"Well, Legolas, why don't you tell me why you're here?"

"Isn't that obvious? Estel practically dragged me in."

Dr. Johnson smiled faintly. "And why did he do that?"

"He thinks I have an eating problem."

"What do you think?"

"I…" Legolas didn't know how to answer. "I realize that I'm causing myself some problems with this, but it's really what I need to cope."

Dr. Johnson was writing on a notepad as he spoke. "What kind of problems?"

"Dizziness, cramps, collapsing when I'm running…" He waited for another question, but Dr. Johnson just watched him over her notepad, and Legolas felt compelled to give a more complete answer. "A while ago, when I first collapsed, I did some research. I know what not eating can do to my body, and that it could eventually kill me. I kind of freaked out and did my best not to think about it.

"Then Estel came. I thought I had everything under control, but he figured everything out in about ten minutes, and then I was having a panic attack and crying all over him… I'm not sure how I'm going to get things back together now. He's not going to let me get away with not eating – I wouldn't put it past him to threaten to call my dad again, that's how he got me here in the first place."

"Is that the only reason you're here? Because Legolas, I should tell you that if you don't want to change, nothing I can say to you is going to make it happen. If you are truly going get better, you need to be here for you."

"I can't, ok?" he snapped. "Do I wish I could just be normal like I used to be? Sure, of course. But this is what I need to manage."

"What if we found you other ways to manage?"

What if she did? Legolas didn't want to die, and he didn't want to disappoint Estel. If Dr. Johnson really could find a way to fix him, wouldn't it be worth a shot?

It was all too overwhelming, and Legolas leaned forward, dropping his head into his hands, trying to hide his tears. Dr. Johnson handed him a box of tissues, which he took gratefully. "I'm sorry," Legolas said thickly, wiping his nose.

"You don't need to apologize for crying here. Cry all you need."

Legolas didn't want to cry anymore, he'd done enough of that already. "Do you really think you can find other ways for me to manage?"

"That's my job, and I'm rather good at it. I'll see about prescribing you something for your anxiety. You'll need to see a psychologist to work through the psychological issues behind this, and a dietician to help you with an achievable meal plan. If that doesn't work, we can try an inpatient program – Legolas, just breathe slowly."

Legolas realized he was hyperventilating. The things Dr. Johnson was saying were terrifying, and he couldn't slow his breathing. Dr. Johnson was suddenly next to him. "Open your mouth. Here, put this under your tongue. Now breathe into this."

Legolas breathed into the paper bag she pressed over his mouth. He didn't know what she'd given him, but it worked fast. Within minutes, he was surprisingly calm, and Dr. Johnson was back on her side of the room, writing on her notepad.

"How are you feeling?"

"Calmer," he admitted.

"Good, I'll make sure to write you that prescription before you go. How long have you been having panic attacks for?"

"About five months. Though more since Estel came. He knows everything, and it's… it's terrifying, to be honest."

"I understand," Dr Johnson said gently. "It's good he found out, though. You need the help, Legolas, and I think you know that. Now, tell me about your father. Why don't want him to know you're unwell?"

"He'll be so sad. I don't want to hurt him…"

For the better part of an hour, they talked. Mostly, Legolas talked and Dr. Johnson asked the occasional question. She did a good job of hiding her feelings about his eating routine – which to any normal person he realized must sound insane. By the end of the session, Legolas was surprised to realize that he felt somewhat comfortable with her.

"I'm going to give you recommendations for the psychologist and dietician, and I want to see you again next week."

Legolas found himself nodding as they went back to the waiting room. Estel had obviously been pacing, and leapt forward at once, pulling Legolas into a tight hug. "How did it go?"

"Alright." Legolas rested his head on his friend's shoulder, sighing in contentment. He always felt safe in Estel's arms.

Estel turned to Dr. Johnson. "What can I do to help him?"

"I'm giving him some medication for the anxiety, though getting a paper bag for him to breath into when he's panicking may be a good idea too. Once the dietician sets his meal plan, he may need help following it – you can get a copy and work on helping him eat with strategies from the psychologist. You'll be staying with him?"

"Yes," Estel said firmly. "As long as it takes."

"Estel… you have to go in a few weeks. We both have college starting up again."

"I am not leaving you again, Las. I'll put in for a transfer. Ada will bribe whoever he has to to get us into the same dorm room once we tell him what's going on."

"But we agreed that we'd both do what was best for our studies –"

"Screw the studies, Las, you are more important! I'm applying for a transfer today."

Dr. Johnson smiled at the pair of them. "You have a good friend, Legolas. You should accept his help."

"Like he's giving me a choice," Legolas muttered sourly, but truthfully, he was grateful. When they got home, Estel spent about an hour on the phone organizing various appointments before finally joining Legolas in the living room.

"How about a run?" Legolas asked hopefully.

"Not a chance, Las. We can watch a movie. I'm ordered a heater that's arriving tomorrow, but for now, come and get under this blanket with me."

How could he resist that? Legolas had dearly missed being warm. He snuggled into Estel's side, not even caring what they were watching.

"Do you really think I can get better?"

"Of course I do, Las. I know eating disorders are hard to overcome, but you're strong and more stubborn than anyone I've ever met. I will not be leaving your side until you are well."

Legolas brushed away a few stray tears, but he was smiling. He burrowed further into Estel, who simply enfolded him into a deeper embrace, swaddling the two of them in the blanket.

Legolas was still afraid and hurting, but for the first time in a year, he felt hopeful about the future.

Aragorn

Eighteen months later

"Legolas! Welcome home."

Thranduil embraced his son warmly before moving to Estel. "Welcome, Estel, welcome. Your father called, he and your brothers will be arriving tomorrow. Your sister is spending this Christmas with her grandparents."

"I know, thanks Thranduil." Aragorn glanced at Legolas. It was clear his friend was nervous. They'd spent last Christmas with Aragorn's family, but they'd already known all about his eating problem by then. Thranduil still needed to be told. He gave Legolas a nudge.

Legolas took a deep breath. "Dad… I need to talk to you about something."

"Sure, what is it?" They followed Thranduil through to the living room. Legolas waited until they were all seated, then spent several seconds staring at his hands. "Legolas? Is something wrong?"

"Not now, not really. I just… I won't be able to eat like I usually do. I know you've got all my favorite dishes prepared, and I'll try, but I have a meal plan that I need to stick to."

"A meal plan? Some kind of diet?"

"No, not a diet." Legolas stared at his knees. "Dad, I have an eating disorder. I've been working on it for a year and a half, and it's mostly under control now, but I still struggle sometimes, and my dietician says I should stick to the meal plan's structure."

Thranduil's face fell. "Over a year? But… why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm sorry." Legolas hung his head. "I just didn't want to worry you. Please, don't be angry."

Thranduil was at his side in an instant, taking both of his son's hands in his. "Of course I am not angry with you, Legolas. I just want you to be well, you know that. I wish you'd told me sooner, but no matter. Give me a copy of your meal plan, I will make sure the chefs prepare things exactly to your specifications."

Legolas let out a long breath and gave his father a shaky smile. "Thanks, Dad."

"See?" Aragorn lightly bumped their shoulders together. "I told you it would be ok."

"I never should have doubted you." Legolas leaned closer to his friend, and Aragorn put an arm around him. Thranduil smiled fondly at the two of them.

"You want some hot cocoa, Estel? What will you take, Legolas?"

"Just water, please."

Having hot cocoa together with Thranduil was kind of a tradition for them, but Aragorn was relieved that Legolas' father offered no objection, handing over the water with the same warm smile as the cocoa.

Aragorn knew Legolas' eating plan off by heart now, and he was confident that when it came time for supper, Legolas would eat. He sometimes needed a bit of help and encouragement, but he hardly ever protested food anymore.

The water was the only thing that was different from their normal pre-Christmas ritual. Aragorn and Legolas still talked over their drinks late into the night, long after Thranduil had gone to bed. Legolas had gained most of his weight back, so at least he wasn't cold all the time anymore, though Aragorn didn't think he'd ever be able to shake the habit of wrapping his best friend in every blanket he could get his hands on.

"Estel?"

Aragorn glanced up at his friend. "Las?"

"Thank you. For everything."

He rolled his eyes. "You've only said it about a thousand times. Are you going for some kind of record?"

"Well, it would hardly be the only thing I hold a record in. What's the score in our tickle wars again?"

"Equal, we're equal."

"You liar, Estel! I'm ahead of you by at least two."

"You are not."

The hours slipped by as they talked and laughed with each other, neither having any inclination to go to bed, though eventually, sleep took them regardless.

Aragorn knew they'd done it again when he woke to find his legs numb. Legolas was stretched over them, snoring. A glance at the window told Aragorn it was still the middle of the night. He shifted his friend into a slightly more comfortable position before allowing himself to drift off once more.

It had been a rough eighteen months, but Legolas was finally well. Aragorn's last thought before he fell asleep was that he'd make sure his friend always would be.