(Not my first work, and probably one of my least faves, but it's also the only one that's actually finished. Writing style and character personalities influenced by that of knives4cash, NeitherNor and DinasEmrys, all of whom do the gay RWBY stuff. Check them out.)

"I don't understand, why are we doing this again?" asks Weiss.

"It's pretty simple really. Yang thinks her girlfriend is better than you." Ruby says.

"And Ruby is completely wrong in thinking that my girlfriend isn't as good as hers," says Yang drily.

"And that somehow validates the fact that you two want us to have a girlfriend-off?" Weiss says.

"Yes." Yang says.

"Do I have a say in this?" asks Blake.

"No." Ruby says firmly.

"Wonderful." Weiss says, rolling her eyes. "Look, we get that the two of you have a somewhat... competitive streak. But that's no reason for the two of us to get involved!"

"Someone a little scared, hmm?" Yang says, smirking at Weiss, playing at her aggressive side.

The young heiress is visibly agitated, but has enough self control to restrain herself.

Unexpectedly, it is Ruby that blows a fuse.

"And what do you mean by that!? We're not scared, not in the slightest!" Ruby is practically fuming. "Whatever your girlfriend can do, mine can do better!"

Blake internally wishes that she'd been assigned to Team JNPR right about now. But then again, how would the team name work? JNPBR? No, that's terrible. Ah, fate, ever the cruel mistress.

"Then why dontcha prove it, sis?" Yang says, hands on her hips, leaning down over Ruby. "Far as I can tell, you're nothing but all talk."

"Ugh! I've had it!" Weiss exclaims, storming towards the door. "I'm going to the library. And don't come get me until you are over your childish whims."

If Blake was in Team JNPR, would that mean she'd get with Nora? After all, she is the most Yang-like. But then she'd have to compete with Lie Ren, and they were very similar. Blake considers her options against him.

"Weiss, no!" Ruby exclaims, reaching out for Weiss and missing by a good ten feet. "Honour! Glory!"

"No," Weiss says decisively, not turning around. Yang is smiling, but she looks a bit dissatisfied. Winning by default proves nothing. Ruby lays face first on the ground, utterly defeated.

Lie Ren's good, but he's not me, Blake thinks. Blake's a girl so she'd know how to please Nora better. Unless Lie Ren is secretly a girl. Blake considers the thought. He doesn't really talk much, so Blake hadn't discerned a speech pattern from him and he might look decent in a dress. It's a bit hard to tell with the way his clothes fall on him. Blake things that using "he" and the like is a bit confusing, and settles for she. After all, in this hypothetical situation, Lie Ren would be a girl.

"Better luck next time, sis!" Yang proclaims, deciding to take advantage of her unsatisfying victory, crossing her arms in front of her. "Guess you'll just have to live with me having the better girlfriend."

But so what if Lie Ren was a girl? He can't possibly be as good as Blake. She's got some primal animal instincts going for her. Ren couldn't possibly beat that.

"So it's not like she would have won anyway," Blake murmurs out loud. She snaps back to reality and immediately slams her hands over her mouth, but it is too late. Weiss stops dead in her tracks, practically out the door. Ruby sits bolt upright with an excited look on her face. Yang stares at Blake, dumbfounded. No one moves an inch from their positions. Blake curses herself and her fat Faunus mouth.

Weiss starts to turn on her heels, agonisingly slow. Her face is cold, expressionless. When she completes the turn, she is silent, staring daggers into a long pause, she eventually speaks.

"You're on."

Curse you, hypothetical situations.

(Good lord, I am so rusty. Hopefully I'll get better over time.)