Disclaimer: I don't own any of the FOP characters featured in the Fairly Odd Parents animated series, however, I am borrowing them for a fun, non profit story. Alex on the other hand, is MY creation (muhahahahahaha, she's all MINE!).
The 'What If' Story
Chapter 1 - Meet Alex
[Timmy Turner scurries back and forth through his bedroom, cleaning up toys and adjusting everything in sight. He's dressed in smart clothes (still with silly pink hat!) and looks nervous, eager to impress. Cosmo and Wanda, disguised as innocent goldfish, follow him with their eyes.]
Cosmo: What's with the cleaning, Timmy? Hot date? [winks]
Timmy: No! Alex will be here any minute!
Wanda: Who's Alex?
[The fairies poof themselves into their normal form.]
Timmy: My cousin! She's the coolest teenager ever! She used to live down the street but moved away a few years ago. I hardly ever see her. She used to babysit me all the time, but her dad is this businessman who flies all over the world and she travels with him now. She's AWESOME! She is the greatest videogame champion ever and eats just about anything for a dare! She is 16 but knows how to do loadsa cool stuff like hotwire a car and burp the alphabet, and -
Wanda: OK sport, we get it, she's great!
Cosmo: Blah! Blah! Blah! Alex this, Alex that! I bet she doesn't have any magical powers! Every minute, everyday!
Timmy: But that was the first time I've ever spoken about Alex -
Cosmo: (interrupting) See! There's HER name again! Although Alex is not really a name for a 'her', is it?
Wanda: Jealous, Cosmo?
Cosmo: No! I'm just sick of hearing about Alex! He's always talking about her!
Timmy: Sorry guys, I just can't wait to see her! We talk on the phone and stuff, but I really miss her. She was like a big sister. I was so sad when she moved away, that's when my parents started paying Vicky to watch me!
Mrs Turner: [from downstairs] TIMMY! ALEX IS HERE! I'LL SEND HER UP!
Timmy: Aggh! She's coming! Quick! Back into your bowl, I gotta hide!
[Cosmo and Wanda poof back into fish as Timmy darts under the bed.]
Cosmo: Weird, why is he hiding? I thought he couldn't wait to see her!
Wanda: No idea. But I wonder if she's as cool as Timmy says!
[The door is pushed open and Alex is standing in the doorway. She resembles Timmy, brunette, big blue eyes, only less overbite and a more mischevous grin. Alex wanders into the room.]
Alex: Timmy? Timmy? [she looks around the room.] Where are you?
[She wanders around the room for a second, Cosmo and Wanda watch.]
Cosmo: She's so pretty!
Wanda: (annoyed) Hey!
Cosmo: (nervously) But nothing compared to you!
[Alex walks over to Timmy's bed and sits on it, pulling off her backpack.]
Alex: Timmy? Don't you wanna say hi?
[Silence.]
Alex: OK then, I'll just have to find some other 10 year old to give your present to....
[At the mention of a present, Timmy shoots out from under the bed.]
Timmy: Did you say present?!
Alex: Oh man, that was too easy! I thought you would have lasted longer!
[The cousins hug.]
Alex: I missed you Timmy!
Timmy: Yeah yeah, me too...blah blah blah. Where's my present?
Alex: [mock crying] Don't you care about your cousin? (shouting) YOU WILL PAY, TIMMY TURNER!
[She tosses him into the air and flips him over. He bounces up and tackles her. They play fight for a few minutes before Timmy manages to pin her.]
Alex: OK, I surrender! I'll give you the present!
Wanda: [quietly to Cosmo] She could've taken him...
[Timmy jumps up excitedly as Alex rummages around in her bag. She produces a brown paper bag and hands it to him.]
Timmy: (sarcastically) Wow, you always were great at wrapping up gifts.
Alex: One of my many talents....Just open it!
[Timmy pulls off the paper and reveals a Crimson Chin comic]
Timmy: (shocked) OH MY GOSH! IS THIS....
Alex: Crimson Chin Number 3? One of only 7 known copies? Yeah, that's it.
Timmy: (amazed) WHERE DID YOU GET THIS?
Alex: I met the creator of Crimson Chin a few weeks ago, I won it off him after he bet I wouldn't eat a plate of 3 month old Mac'n'Cheese without puking. I sure showed him.
Timmy: Oh my gosh! The creator?! What's he like? And ewwwww, is any bet worth that?
Alex: Hey! I won you the comic, don't complain! Ohh he's sooooo boring. Lives with his mother. Sweats a lot and enjoys scratching himself.
Timmy: Ewwwwwwww.
Alex: Tell me about it.
Timmy: Thanks though! This is so cool! [hugs the comic to his chest, then hugs Alex, then decides to hug the comic again]
Alex: That's OK, kiddo. [notices Timmy's video games] Hey! Is that the Crash Nebula video game?
Timmy: Uh huh, wanna play?
Alex: I dunno. I might beat you too bad.
Timmy: You're on.
[They rush over to the games.]
Timmy: Ha! Beat you here!
Alex: We'll see who's laughing after this game, Speedy.
Timmy: OK, I'm Player 1, you're Player 2!
[They play for a few seconds before the game says in a robotic voice: WINNER! PLAYER 2! Alex grins and pretends to file her nails.]
Timmy: (deadpan) Beginner's luck. 2 out of 3!
[They play again, but sure enough, soon comes the robotic voice: WINNER! PLAYER 2!]
Timmy: Darn it!
Alex: I'll give you some hints.
Timmy: Thanks!
[Hours pass and Timmy has listened to countless stories from Alex. He's staring at her in awe.]
Alex: Hey, did you know that when ancient Egyptians died, if they were important enough, their organs were preserved in little jars?
Timmy: Ewwwww! Really?!
Alex: Yeah! They pulled the brain out the nose! They used to shove a big hook up there, wiggle it around so the brain gets all soft and mushy, then scoop it out in little spoonfuls!
Timmy: (horrified) That is disgusting.....(in awe) BUT SOOOOOOOOOO AWESOME!
Alex: You want disgusting, wait 'til you start kissing girls! Hahaha!
Timmy: ALEX!
Alex: Hahaha. Well, it's been fun messing with ya Timmy, but I'm gonna hit the sack. See you tomorrow!
[She leaves the room as Wanda and Cosmo poof into their normal forms next to Timmy.]
Timmy: Well guys, what do you think? Isn't she great?
Wanda: No....SHE'S REALLY GREAT! You're lucky to have such a cool cousin, Timmy!
Cosmo: Yeah, and that thing about kissing girls is true you know!
[Wanda stares at him.]
Cosmo: Well, kissing other girls except you! I mean, not that I kiss other girls...But I have had other girlfriends...Not that we kissed....And...And...I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY!
Wanda: Just be quiet.
Timmy: Oh man. I can't believe how cool Alex is. She's way nicer than Vicky, way cooler than all my friends. I miss her so much!
Wanda: Timmy, Alex is a nice girl, but that doesn't mean she is all the time. 16 year old girls are notorious for mood swings -
Cosmo: Well just girls in general actually!
[Wanda narrows her eyes.]
Cosmo: WHY DO I KEEP TALKING?!
Wanda: What I'm trying to say is Timmy, I'm sure Alex isn't that cool all the time. You only see her ever so often so you only see the best of her. The rest of the time, she's probably just like everybody else. Teenagers are always moody, rebellious, greasy, - generally yucky to be around.
Timmy: Is that why Vicky is icky with a V?
Wanda: Well yes, but I think mainly it's because...to put it scientifically...She sucks.
Timmy: Well I don't think Alex is ever icky! I bet she's cool all the time.
Wanda: Timmy, you don't understand girls. They get mad sometimes!
Cosmo: Yeah, it can get pretty ugly! [feels Wanda's look] AGH! My mouth won't stop! HELP ME!
Timmy: You know, if Alex hadn't moved away, I never would have gotten Vicky, and I'd have a cool cousin to play video games with and tell me about gross Egyptians, if Alex was still here....WAIT! GUYS! I HAVE A WISH!
....
A/N - Sorry to any girls named Alex, I just wanted to make Cosmo sound petty! I think Alex is a lovely name :-) Why else did I choose it for this story?!
The 'What If' Story
Chapter 1 - Meet Alex
[Timmy Turner scurries back and forth through his bedroom, cleaning up toys and adjusting everything in sight. He's dressed in smart clothes (still with silly pink hat!) and looks nervous, eager to impress. Cosmo and Wanda, disguised as innocent goldfish, follow him with their eyes.]
Cosmo: What's with the cleaning, Timmy? Hot date? [winks]
Timmy: No! Alex will be here any minute!
Wanda: Who's Alex?
[The fairies poof themselves into their normal form.]
Timmy: My cousin! She's the coolest teenager ever! She used to live down the street but moved away a few years ago. I hardly ever see her. She used to babysit me all the time, but her dad is this businessman who flies all over the world and she travels with him now. She's AWESOME! She is the greatest videogame champion ever and eats just about anything for a dare! She is 16 but knows how to do loadsa cool stuff like hotwire a car and burp the alphabet, and -
Wanda: OK sport, we get it, she's great!
Cosmo: Blah! Blah! Blah! Alex this, Alex that! I bet she doesn't have any magical powers! Every minute, everyday!
Timmy: But that was the first time I've ever spoken about Alex -
Cosmo: (interrupting) See! There's HER name again! Although Alex is not really a name for a 'her', is it?
Wanda: Jealous, Cosmo?
Cosmo: No! I'm just sick of hearing about Alex! He's always talking about her!
Timmy: Sorry guys, I just can't wait to see her! We talk on the phone and stuff, but I really miss her. She was like a big sister. I was so sad when she moved away, that's when my parents started paying Vicky to watch me!
Mrs Turner: [from downstairs] TIMMY! ALEX IS HERE! I'LL SEND HER UP!
Timmy: Aggh! She's coming! Quick! Back into your bowl, I gotta hide!
[Cosmo and Wanda poof back into fish as Timmy darts under the bed.]
Cosmo: Weird, why is he hiding? I thought he couldn't wait to see her!
Wanda: No idea. But I wonder if she's as cool as Timmy says!
[The door is pushed open and Alex is standing in the doorway. She resembles Timmy, brunette, big blue eyes, only less overbite and a more mischevous grin. Alex wanders into the room.]
Alex: Timmy? Timmy? [she looks around the room.] Where are you?
[She wanders around the room for a second, Cosmo and Wanda watch.]
Cosmo: She's so pretty!
Wanda: (annoyed) Hey!
Cosmo: (nervously) But nothing compared to you!
[Alex walks over to Timmy's bed and sits on it, pulling off her backpack.]
Alex: Timmy? Don't you wanna say hi?
[Silence.]
Alex: OK then, I'll just have to find some other 10 year old to give your present to....
[At the mention of a present, Timmy shoots out from under the bed.]
Timmy: Did you say present?!
Alex: Oh man, that was too easy! I thought you would have lasted longer!
[The cousins hug.]
Alex: I missed you Timmy!
Timmy: Yeah yeah, me too...blah blah blah. Where's my present?
Alex: [mock crying] Don't you care about your cousin? (shouting) YOU WILL PAY, TIMMY TURNER!
[She tosses him into the air and flips him over. He bounces up and tackles her. They play fight for a few minutes before Timmy manages to pin her.]
Alex: OK, I surrender! I'll give you the present!
Wanda: [quietly to Cosmo] She could've taken him...
[Timmy jumps up excitedly as Alex rummages around in her bag. She produces a brown paper bag and hands it to him.]
Timmy: (sarcastically) Wow, you always were great at wrapping up gifts.
Alex: One of my many talents....Just open it!
[Timmy pulls off the paper and reveals a Crimson Chin comic]
Timmy: (shocked) OH MY GOSH! IS THIS....
Alex: Crimson Chin Number 3? One of only 7 known copies? Yeah, that's it.
Timmy: (amazed) WHERE DID YOU GET THIS?
Alex: I met the creator of Crimson Chin a few weeks ago, I won it off him after he bet I wouldn't eat a plate of 3 month old Mac'n'Cheese without puking. I sure showed him.
Timmy: Oh my gosh! The creator?! What's he like? And ewwwww, is any bet worth that?
Alex: Hey! I won you the comic, don't complain! Ohh he's sooooo boring. Lives with his mother. Sweats a lot and enjoys scratching himself.
Timmy: Ewwwwwwww.
Alex: Tell me about it.
Timmy: Thanks though! This is so cool! [hugs the comic to his chest, then hugs Alex, then decides to hug the comic again]
Alex: That's OK, kiddo. [notices Timmy's video games] Hey! Is that the Crash Nebula video game?
Timmy: Uh huh, wanna play?
Alex: I dunno. I might beat you too bad.
Timmy: You're on.
[They rush over to the games.]
Timmy: Ha! Beat you here!
Alex: We'll see who's laughing after this game, Speedy.
Timmy: OK, I'm Player 1, you're Player 2!
[They play for a few seconds before the game says in a robotic voice: WINNER! PLAYER 2! Alex grins and pretends to file her nails.]
Timmy: (deadpan) Beginner's luck. 2 out of 3!
[They play again, but sure enough, soon comes the robotic voice: WINNER! PLAYER 2!]
Timmy: Darn it!
Alex: I'll give you some hints.
Timmy: Thanks!
[Hours pass and Timmy has listened to countless stories from Alex. He's staring at her in awe.]
Alex: Hey, did you know that when ancient Egyptians died, if they were important enough, their organs were preserved in little jars?
Timmy: Ewwwww! Really?!
Alex: Yeah! They pulled the brain out the nose! They used to shove a big hook up there, wiggle it around so the brain gets all soft and mushy, then scoop it out in little spoonfuls!
Timmy: (horrified) That is disgusting.....(in awe) BUT SOOOOOOOOOO AWESOME!
Alex: You want disgusting, wait 'til you start kissing girls! Hahaha!
Timmy: ALEX!
Alex: Hahaha. Well, it's been fun messing with ya Timmy, but I'm gonna hit the sack. See you tomorrow!
[She leaves the room as Wanda and Cosmo poof into their normal forms next to Timmy.]
Timmy: Well guys, what do you think? Isn't she great?
Wanda: No....SHE'S REALLY GREAT! You're lucky to have such a cool cousin, Timmy!
Cosmo: Yeah, and that thing about kissing girls is true you know!
[Wanda stares at him.]
Cosmo: Well, kissing other girls except you! I mean, not that I kiss other girls...But I have had other girlfriends...Not that we kissed....And...And...I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY!
Wanda: Just be quiet.
Timmy: Oh man. I can't believe how cool Alex is. She's way nicer than Vicky, way cooler than all my friends. I miss her so much!
Wanda: Timmy, Alex is a nice girl, but that doesn't mean she is all the time. 16 year old girls are notorious for mood swings -
Cosmo: Well just girls in general actually!
[Wanda narrows her eyes.]
Cosmo: WHY DO I KEEP TALKING?!
Wanda: What I'm trying to say is Timmy, I'm sure Alex isn't that cool all the time. You only see her ever so often so you only see the best of her. The rest of the time, she's probably just like everybody else. Teenagers are always moody, rebellious, greasy, - generally yucky to be around.
Timmy: Is that why Vicky is icky with a V?
Wanda: Well yes, but I think mainly it's because...to put it scientifically...She sucks.
Timmy: Well I don't think Alex is ever icky! I bet she's cool all the time.
Wanda: Timmy, you don't understand girls. They get mad sometimes!
Cosmo: Yeah, it can get pretty ugly! [feels Wanda's look] AGH! My mouth won't stop! HELP ME!
Timmy: You know, if Alex hadn't moved away, I never would have gotten Vicky, and I'd have a cool cousin to play video games with and tell me about gross Egyptians, if Alex was still here....WAIT! GUYS! I HAVE A WISH!
....
A/N - Sorry to any girls named Alex, I just wanted to make Cosmo sound petty! I think Alex is a lovely name :-) Why else did I choose it for this story?!