'cause i don't know how it gets better that this
you take my hand and drag me head first
fearless
and i don't know why but with you i'd dance in a storm in my best dress
fearless
well you stood there with me in the doorway
my hands shake
i'm not usually this way but
you pull me in and i'm a little more brave
it's the first kiss
it's flawless
really something
it's fearless
~taylor swift. fearless.


(R A C H E L p o v)

"What would your universe be like?"

It's a simple question.

But that one question, those six words, somehow managed to turn your entire world upside down in a matter of days.

Life was good. Perfect, even. You were dating the boy of your dreams, the star of the football team, the male lead of Glee, the cutest boy you'd ever seen. You, you, were dating Finn Hudson. He chose you over everyone else, over the beautiful Quinn and the sexy Santana. You were just that freaky dwarf with a really loud voice, and he decided to date you, to kiss you, to love you.

So, what could possibly be wrong?

At first, you didn't think anything. Nothing could ruin your happiness. Nothing could bring you down.

Then Sam Evans moved and started school at McKinley High.


You met him on his first day at school, when he was struggling to fit everything in his locker. You hadn't been paying attention to where you were walking because Karofsky had just slushied you and you were trying to keep the corn syrup out of your eyes. And, because you were blinking rapidly and not looking in front of you, you didn't see the blonde boy standing in front of you and ran into his side so hard that he almost fell over.

You had been walking as quickly as possible to try to miss less class, you were already five minutes late and you still had to clean off, so when you plowed into Sam you hit him much harder than a tiny girl like you should've been able to and he got knocked into the lockers.

"Oh my gosh, I am so sorry!" you gasp out, reaching automatically to try and pull him upright from where he had slumped against the lockers. "Are you quite all right?"

He snorts before he turns to look at you, saying "Yeah, I'm quite-" before noticing that icy liquid covering your face and sweater. "Hey, are you all right? What're you covered in?"

He takes a step closer as he asks, one hand reaching out in an automatic gesture of comfort. His eyes are slightly darker with concern, and the feeling of someone, a stranger nonetheless, actually caring about you is so startling that you start to cry.

You break down into full sobs in front of a boy that you don't even know, covered in cherry ice that is slowly but surely ruining your sweater, and all because someone actually took the time to wonder if you were okay.

You honestly can't remember the last time somebody bothered to check on you after you were slushied, not even Finn.

"Woah, hey, um, I didn't mean to offend you. Please, just stop crying? I'm terrible with crying chicks!" Sam says, carefully wrapping an arm around your shaking shoulders and pulling you into his body. He's warm and he smells like oranges and Old Spice and your tears slow at the foreign feeling of someone providing unconditional comfort to you.

"Come on," he says, slamming his locker shut and grabbing your bag off the ground. "I'm the new one here," he teases quietly, an arm still wrapped around you, "you're gonna have to tell me where to go."

You remain silent and direct him towards the bathrooms down the hall. "Thank you," you croak out, your voice rough from the crying. That's when you finally take in his full appearance.

He's wearing blue jeans that are clearly well-worn but not falling to pieces, they rest comfortably on his hips and he's got on a brown leather belt. He's got on a baseball t-shirt, white with red sleeves and it's then that you notice the stain spread across the left side of his shirt.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" you gasp, a hand fluttering out to touch the stain on his chest before you can think better of the action. "Your shirt got all stained because you hugged me."

He just grins down at you, the smile making his eyes, still dark with concern, lighten and shine. "It's not a problem, uh," he trails off, clearly waiting for your name.

You laugh too, the sound still slightly more hysterical than you would like, and grin back at him, that soft smile that's reserved for Noah on the days that he does something nice and your dads whenever they're actually home. He doesn't deserve your crazy Rachel Berry smile. "I'm Rachel. And you? I assume you're the new blonde kid everyone is talking about," you giggle, turning around before he responds to check that there's no one else in the girl's bathroom.

"I'm Sam. Sam I am," he chuckles slightly, not even hesitating to follow you into the bathroom.

"Oh, I love Dr. Suess!" you respond, once again flashing a brilliant grin at him. you grab your bag and start trying to find your clothes before he brings up his previous question.

"So… are you alright? Why're you covered in," he reaches out and swipes an index finger down your cheek, pulling it back and putting it in his mouth, "cherry slushy?"

You gape at him for a moment because did he really just taste the icy liquid that you were covered in? He just continues to look at you, his face questioning, so you shake your head and give up trying to figure out how the rest of your day is going to go.

"I'm covered in slushy because I told Karofsky to stop bullying Kurt. No one else seems to care, but he shoved Kurt into the lockers today so I yelled at him and he got revenge. Apparently he doesn't enjoy it when uppity bitches tell him what to do," you say, spitting out the last few words in a voice far more bitter than anything you had ever said before.

"Oh," is all he says in response. You're beginning to fear that he, like everyone else, is now going to think that you're a freak and refuse to have anything to do with you, but instead he drops his backpack on the floor and takes another step towards you.

"Want help washing out your hair?" he grins, already pulling out the folded chair by the sinks and setting it down. You sit in front of the sink and allow him to run his fingers through your hair, red ice washing down the drain .

He makes no comment when silent tears begin to seep from your eyes again.

You've changed and dried your hair, all the while keeping up a a conversation with Sam. You know that he's got two parents that are always at work and that he's got two younger siblings that he adores. you know that he loves playing guitar and that he's thinking about joining a club that has to do with music. When you told him about Glee club, he grinned and said that he'd think about joining as long as you were there. You blushed through your entire story about your fathers because of it.

The bell is ringing and you're walking out of the bathroom without even worrying about the fact that you just skipped an entire class period. He's still holding your bag as well as his own and he's assuring you that he really doesn't care that there's cherry on his shirt, that he has a ton more exactly like it at home.

That's when Finn finds you.

You introduce the two of them, telling Sam that Finn's your boyfriend, before the bell rings again. You ask Sam if he needs any help finding his next class but he just grins and hands you your bag, telling you that he'll be fine.

He pulls you into another half hug before he leaves and then walks away, completely ignoring Finn.

"What the hell was that, Rachel? And why weren't you in class last period?" Finn spits out as soon as Sam's gone, crossing his arms over his chest and glaring at you.

"That was Sam, Finn," you explain patiently, trying to ignore the quiet rage silently building in your chest, "he's new here. He helped me clean up from the slushy that Karofsky threw at me. Because, you know, no one else cared," the words come out in a hiss and Finn blinks in shock before you turn around and flounce down the hall towards Noah, who had witnessed the entire situation.

"Oh, thank God. Berry. Are you finally done with Finnocence?" he asks as he begins to walk with you to your next class, your arm tucked into his.

"I love Finn. Noah," you retort, but the reply doesn't have the same conviction that it used to.

Why is a complete stranger nicer to you than your own boyfriend is?


You get through the next two periods without worrying about lunch too much. When you're fighting with Finn, you're never sure who to eat lunch with. The Glee kids don't really seem to like you and clearly, no one else in the school does either. Noah always leaves campus for lunch, getting in his truck with a Cheerio or freshmen or, occasionally, Quinn and leaving for the entire hour.

So, without Finn, you have no one to sit with.

You're walking towards the cafeteria at a pace so slow it feels like a death march. You really don't want to go in there.

"Hey Rae!" someone calls behind you an you turn to see blonde hair and a brewed smile. "Eat lunch with me?" Sam asks, grinning at the shock on your face.

You glance at the cafeteria one more time, thinking about Finn on the inside, before turning back to Sam. "Sure! But let's eat outside, is that all right? It seemed very nice outside this morning." Sam nods an agreement and the two of you walk out towards the picnic tales at the back of the school, you sitting primly on the bench and Sam sprawling across the entire table top. You just shake your head, murmur boys, and set the rest of your lunch on the bench next to you.

You spend the lunch period talking about Avatar and debating the meanings behind everything. You're pleasantly surprised to find someone else who likes the movie as much as you did, Finn had simply said that the alien sex was weird when you got home from the theatre and that was that.

But Sam liked the movies just as much as you had, maybe even more seeing as how he took the time to learn the Na'vi language. He's laughing at your attempts to say, well, anything really. Apparently you're not very skilled at speaking Na'vi.

A plane passes over the two of you and you both pause speaking to turn your heads and look at it. You're still silent five minutes later, a comfortable silence that seems to warm the air around the two of you the same way that the sun is. You're eating the last of you're lunch when he finally speaks again, his voice quieter than it was previously.

"Hey, Rach," he says, turning his head so that his eyes meet yours. you cock your head to the side in silent question, and he speaks without further prompting. "What's your universe look like?"

The question is so completely random that you freeze for a few seconds, and right when you're opening your mouth to attempt to answer, the bell rings and signifies the end of lunch.

Sam just smiles at you again, that easy smile that makes you think of sunshine and happiness, and assures you that you can answer the question later.

The walk back to school and your next class is silent.


It's a Friday, and you find yourself nearly sighing with relief when the final bell rings and you get to leave. You hadn't been able to concentrate for the rest of your classes, and you feared that you wouldn't be able to pay attention until you thought of an answer for the question Sam proposed. You leave school in a hurry, ignoring Finn's voice when you hear him calling out for you.

You don't want to talk to him right now.

You have things to think about.


You spend the entire weekend thinking about Sam's question. You get out paper to try and make a list, but everything that you come up with just seems silly. You're listing necessities like water and a nice home, and you don't think that those are the answers Sam was looking for.

So you keep thinking.

It's Sunday night and you're staring at the stars out of your window, and you think that you'd really like a universe with gold stars, because that's exactly what you're going to be someday.

After that, the answers come easily. You want somewhere with Broadway shows every night, somewhere with no slushies and no bullies and no pain. You want somewhere that is filled with people who care about you, somewhere that you can break into song whenever you feel like it.

You think that you'd like to have Noah there, not Puck but definitely Noah, because you did grow up with him before he became the jerk that knocked up his best friend. But he's back to being more Noah than Puck and you try to think of things that he'd like to fill your universe with too. You do the same thing with your dads and your favorite aunt and wonder if you'd want any of the Glee club members in your world.

It isn't until you've planned out everything, down to the matching mansions that you're going to own, just so you can decorate one completely different from the other and switch whenever you get bored, that you realize that there is no Finn in your world.

You hadn't even thought of him.

You had thought of Noah and all the things that he could possible want, you'd thought of your fathers and their favorite things. You had even thought of Sam and considered making Na'vi a second language on your planet.

But you hadn't thought of Finn.

You're scared to think of what that means, so you turn off the light and go to sleep.


When you wake up in the morning, you start exercising and try to think of Glee, like you do every other day. But all you can think of is the fact that Finn fits nowhere in your world. He doesn't fit in the theatre where you and Kurt will discuss Broadway or in the library that will be filled with first editions of Shakespeare's plays. He doesn't fit in Noah's home, or with your fathers, or in the New York City sky-rises that you imagined everywhere.

You finish getting ready for school with a heavy heart and a determined mind.

You wait until lunch and grab Finn's arm when he walks by you, pulling him off to the side.

"Oh, so you feel like talking to me now?" he huffs, arms tight across his chest.

You take a deep breath and smile at him, your eyes watering slightly. He's everything that you ever wanted, everything that you thought you needed, and you're breaking up with him because of a question that a boy you had known for a day asked you.

It's crazy.

But you're Rachel Berry, so it's probably expected anyways.

"Finn," you whisper, reaching up to cup his cheek in your palm, "I don't know what my universe looks like, not exactly. But you're not in it."

He blinks in confusion, tilting his head like a puppy and he's so unbearably cute, so unbearably Finn for a moment, that you consider taking it back, telling him to ignore what you just said.

But then you picture a world with gold stars and Broadway music all the time, where people speak Na'vi and Noah got to keep the daughter that he loved more than anything else in his life. Your parents are there, and maybe some of Glee, and Noah with Beth. There's one more guy in your perfect world, and he's blonde with a smile like the sun, not brunette with a crooked half-smile.

"So… I have no clue what that means," he responds and you remove your hand, taking a step backwards.

"It means that we're breaking up, Finn."

He's gaping at you, stuttering out your name, but you just keep stepping backwards, whispering I'm sorry in a voice too quiet for him to hear and leaving the room.

You walk to the front doors to see Sam and Noah standing there, Quinn tucked underneath one of Noah's arm. The two of them are conversing with Sam when you walk up to the three, smoothing down your hair and blinking away your tears.

"Hello," you say brightly, grinning when they turn to look at you. "Why are," you begin to ask, before glancing out the window and seeing the rain. It's positively pouring, the water falling so heavily that you can barely make out the picnic tables a few yards away. You grin excitedly and bounce up and down on your toes before you can stop yourself. "I love the rain!" you squeal, pressing your face up against the window.

Noah's laughing and Quinn's shaking her head, but Sam's just smiling at you. You grin back at him. "I think that there are going to be numerous rainy days in my universe," you say, meeting his eyes.

"Oh, really?" he asks, seeing something in your smile or something in your eyes and taking a step closer. "What else?" he questions, Quinn and Noah silent observers at your back.

"Well, there will be gold stars everywhere. And Broadway music and mansions and my fathers. Noah and Beth and Quinn, if she wants," you say, breaking your gaze with Sam for a moment to turn around and look at the couple behind you. One of Noah's eyebrows is raised and Quinn's looking at you curiously, and you smile at them before turning back to Sam. "And there will be vegan restaurants and everyone will be able to speak Na'vi and…" you trail off, looking away from him again to glance at the rain sliding down the window.

"And Finn?" he asks cautiously, taking another step towards you.

You turn back to him. "No, no Finn," you murmur softly, ignoring Quinn's gasp from behind you. "He didn't fit," you say simply, hoping that he'll understand because you really don't know how else to explain it.

He nods, the beginnings of that brilliant grin of his curling around the edge of his lips. "Do I?"

"You might," you laugh, feeling crazy and fearless and reckless. You just gave up the boy that you had always wanted because he didn't fit into an imaginary universe, and you were telling a boy that you barely knew that you thought that he might belong in your perfect world.

"Well, I do already know Na'vi," he laughs, wrapping a hand around yours.

"True. But, more importantly, do you like the rain?" you twist your hand in his so that your fingers are all tangles together, and he smiles at you before shoving the door open and yanking you outside.

You start laughing as he twirls you around and you can see Noah's smirk and Quinn's incredulous face from where you're dancing. Your clothes, rather nice ones today, are getting soaked and your shoes are getting slippery. You kick your shoes off without another thought and continue to dance with Sam.

His grin is so bright and you're giggling like you never did with Finn.

And as Sam presses a chaste kiss to your cheek, his lips cold with rain water, you think that maybe you don't need your own universe.

Maybe you can make the one you already have just as perfect as the one that you imagined.

Maybe.


Okay. So. It's been quite a while since I wrote anything. Hopefully this is all right. I didn't want Sam to seem to OOC, but I feel like this is how Sam should have been, before he got all caught up in Quinn and football and being popular. As this is at the very beginning of the second season, I decided to include Beth and Puck&Quinn and not just ignore the fact that any of it happened like the Glee writers appeared to.

I don't own Glee or Fearless.

Thanks so much for reading.