A Stool, a blond wig, and a papaya
"Rosalie!" I yelled as I looked at the reflection in the mirror. "I can't do this!"
"You can and you will Isabella Swan, and I don't want to hear another whiny word out of you!" Rose always was compassionate.
"I look like an absolute idiot." I didn't care if it sounded a bit whiny; I wasn't happy and Rose needed to know it.
"Bella, seriously. You lost the bet and that means you have to do what Alice and I say, so suck it up already."
I sighed loudly and shut my eyes against the image in the mirror. I couldn't believe what I had gotten myself into. I was never going to drink again. Well, maybe never again after tonight. I definitely would need some liquid courage to get through tonight.
Last weekend, while in a drunken stupor, I agreed to bet my two best friends and roommates that I could talk to a devastatingly handsome man at the pool table near us without blushing. Of course, the moment his eyes turned to me, I lit up like a Christmas tree. I couldn't even say "hi" and ran to the ladies' room. And, yes, that still happened even though I was drunk.
I had always been painfully shy around guys. Rosalie says I don't have enough confidence, but it's hard to develop a lot of confidence in yourself when you're spending all of your time around Rosalie, the most beautiful woman on earth, and Alice, the petite fashionplate.
Evidently, the terms of our bet were that I would follow a direction of theirs at a bar the next weekend, no questions asked. Rose had decided that I needed to wear a blond wig because "blonds have more fun", but I honestly think she wants to just humiliate me. Alice's stipulation was less embarrassing, but more mortifying. She said that once we got there, she would chose an empty stool at the bar, and I would have to talk to every man that sat in it until she decided I had had enough practice. I secretly hoped a woman sat there and didn't move all evening, but I figured Alice would find her way around that somehow.
So here I am, about to go out with my two best friends, wearing a blond wig and an outfit Alice picked out. I'm not sure how she got to pick my clothes and make me talk to men all night, but Alice was deceptively good at getting her way.
We got to the bar and found a circular booth near the end of the bar. We all ordered our usual drinks: Rose got a tequila sunrise, Alice a cosmo, and I got a whiskey sour. Alice usually teased me about my drink of choice, insisting it was manly. She thought I should order something with a fruit other than lemon in it. I couldn't help it if I loved the combination of the warmth of the Jack and the sourness of the lemon. I certainly wasn't going to sit around daintily sipping an appletini or some shit just to appear more feminine.
I took a long sip from my short, fat glass and settled in while Rose and Alice sipped from their shapelier barware. Alice's eyes were roaming around the room, searching for something or someone yet unseen. Rose looked bored. Finally I spoke up, "So Alice, which stool do I have to talk to tonight?"
"Bella, you'll be talking to the guys, not the stool," Alice grinned.
"I doubt that. The guys will run away as soon as I try to open my mouth and nothing comes out. I might as well talk to the stool for all the good it's going to do me."
"That's why you have the wig," Rosalie interjected. "It's to give you enough anonymity and help you feel like you're playing a part. Tonight will be your greatest role yet: the ultimate sex kitten."
"Rosalie, all this wig does for me is help me feel ridiculous," I scowled at her.
"We'll see about that," Rose smirked like she knew something I did not.
Alice chose a stool close to our booth. It was empty for the moment, as were the two stools surrounding it. A sense of impending doom began to rise in my chest. In an attempt to keep it down, I finished my drink quickly and ordered another.
Alice and Rosalie were chatting happily about their plans to go shopping the next day, and I was getting more and more anxious, when a girl walked in and sat on the stool. I breathed a huge sigh of relief.
Rosalie got up and went over to the girl. I couldn't really hear what she said over the music, but the girl looked over at me, smiled, and then left. Damn! Rose walked back over and smiled at me.
"Rose, why did you go and do that? I thought I was free!" I squealed at her and hit her in the arm.
"Bella, this is for your own good. I just told her about the bet, and she moved on no problem."
"You do realize that was rude to do that to her?"
"She didn't mind. She was happy to help." I could have killed her.
Alice cleared her throat and called our attention away from our bickering. She pointed over to the stool that was now occupied by a relatively handsome guy. He looked about our age, and he had blond, spiky hair. Alice looked at me expectantly and waved her hand in his direction.
I groaned audibly and got out of the booth. I adjusted my clothes and started to walk toward him. My heart was suddenly hammering a mile a minute, and my palms got all sweaty. I sat on a stool near him and looked over at him. He smiled, and I tried to say something, but no sound came out of my mouth when I opened it.
"Hi. I'm Mike. What's your name?" He seemed friendly enough.
"I'm Bella." I finally found my voice. My face was bright red; I was sure. I could actually feel the heat rolling off it in waves.
"I've always had a thing for blonds. Your eyes are beautiful. Brown-eyed blonds are really special."
"Yeah." I honestly had no idea what else to say to the guy. He was cute enough, but if all he could think to say was a cheesy line about me having brown eyes, I wasn't sure he was worth the huge effort I was expending here. I could see he was trying, but I wasn't feeling it.
"Are you here alone?" Mike asked as he looked around.
"No, I'm here with some friends." I pointed over at the booth and the girls waved back.
"So, Bella, want to dance?"
"Um, sure."
I let Mike lead me out to the dance floor, and before I knew it, he was grinding all over me. It wasn't even the type of song people grind to. I looked at Rose and Alice with a pleading look in my eyes. They were laughing their heads off. Mike ground his crotch against my hip, and my mouth fell open in shock. Rose made her way to me and said something to Mike I didn't hear. I was too thankful to care much.
By the time I was safely back in our booth, I was livid. "Thank you so much for forcing that guy on me! No one should have to endure having a random guy rub his junk against her! The most original thing he could think to say to me was that he thought it was cool that I had blond hair and brown eyes, and he didn't even say that with finesse. I could kill you both!"
"Bella, calm down. You know we're just trying to break you out of your shell a little here. Think of it this way, it couldn't possibly get worse than that guy right?" Alice said as she tried to calm me.
Rosalie pushed my drink towards me and added, "I rescued you before he could do too much damage. Like Alice said, it can only go up from here."
"And it looks like you might get another chance," Alice bounced slightly in her seat when she saw another guy sit on the stool.
As I looked over at the stool, my feeling of dread evaporated. I tried to keep my face impassive so the girls couldn't figure anything out. I walked over to the guy on the stool and calmly flipped my fake hair back and introduced myself.
"Bells! What's up?" Jake greeted me enthusiastically. He was about to hug me, but I stopped him by touching his bicep. Alice's eyes were bulging out of her head, and Rosalie had a cocky smile on her face.
"Hey, Jake. Can you play along for a while and pretend you don't know me?" I asked Jake with my voice reeking of desperation.
"Um, sure, Bells, but why am I doing this? And why are you wearing a wig?"
I pointed to Rose and Alice and quickly explained, "It's a bet with my roommates. I have to talk to every guy who sits in that stool tonight. The wig is supposed to give me confidence or something."
"Well your real hair is way prettier, Bells. I guess I can play along, but I'm meeting the guys here soon for Sam's bachelor party. He's finally marrying Emily, by the way. You know the guys won't be able to keep quiet for long. The cat will be out of the bag as soon as they see you."
"Well, even a few minutes will be better than nothing."
"How did you get into this one?"
"Drunken bet."
"I'm sure Charlie would be proud."
"Don't you dare mention this to him, Jacob Black. I've got plenty of stories I could let slip about you the next time I visit Billy." My threat wasn't a very good one considering I would get in just as much trouble as Jake if many of those stories came out.
Jake and I had been friends since high school. We had tried the dating thing once, but it didn't work out. He cared a lot about me and I cared about him too, but I just didn't feel as attracted to him as I should. We kind of drifted apart when I went to college and he stayed behind to work at his friend's garage.
"Well, Bells, here come the guys. You better run now if you don't want them to out you," Jake grinned widely at me and poked my ribs a little.
"Ok, Jake, but we should get together while you're in town. Call me tomorrow if you're coherent enough after your party."
"Sure, sure. Talk to you later, Bells." Jake even waved a little at Rose and Alice as I walked away. The guys, who were whistling and teasing Jake about the hot blond, suddenly surrounded him. If only they knew that it was actually me in this get-up. I couldn't contain the laughter that came bubbling up.
"I told you, Bella. I knew this would help!" Alice was way too excited.
"I knew that wig would help you feel more confident. You actually touched him! He seemed to really like you," Rosalie added.
"Yeah, I think he's going to call me," I giggled. I'd tell them tomorrow about Jake and how I knew him. For now, it was too fun having a secret.
Alice squealed, and Rose grinned and nodded.
Two guys came in then and sat in the two seats around the stool. They were talking to each other and seemed to be friends. They looked a little familiar, but I was sure I had never met them before. Alice and Rosalie looked a bit disappointed that neither of them sat in "my" stool until they took the time to really look at the guys. I think I actually saw drool coming out of Rosalie's mouth for a second.
"I'm going to marry the guy with the blond curls," Alice's voice was dripping with confidence.
"Um, Alice you might want to meet him first," I joked.
"Doesn't matter. He'll be perfect, just you wait and see."
"Well, I like him already. He and his friend are keeping that stool clear for me."
"His friend is seriously hot. I love big guys like that, and look at his dimples! Gah," Rose said before she practically wilted in her seat.
"So go on over and talk to them, ladies," I encouraged.
"Not so fast, Bella. Tonight is about you. We'll talk to them later maybe," Alice said. She looked with longing at the guy with the blond curls. I thought if I pushed it, I could get her to give up, but just then another guy walked up to them.
I could not believe my eyes. It was the same guy I had tried to talk to the other night at the pool table. At least, I was pretty sure it was. He had the same copper-colored hair and lean, muscular build.
Suddenly, I was panicking. I was having trouble breathing, and I was silently praying to any god who would listen that this guy would not sit down on that stool. Of course, he did.
The girls' eyes lit up and they practically shoved me out my seat. "I can't do this. I seriously can't do this."
"Yes, you can, Bella. You did great with the last guy. You can do this! Now get your cute butt over there and talk to that guy!" Alice had no mercy.
I shook the entire way over to the group of guys. I managed to get there, but had trouble deciding how to say anything.
"Well, hi there," the big one said. He had a big grin on his face and seemed nice enough.
"Hi," I managed lamely.
I took a deep breath and felt myself relax just enough to look at the other two guys. The blond one said, "Hello. My name is Jasper and this is Edward and Emmett." He motioned first to the guy I was supposed to talk to and then over to the big guy.
"Nice to meet you guys."
"So, Bella, is there something we can do for you this evening?" Emmett was pouring on the charm.
"Well, my friends over there sent me to talk to you."
"I'll have to thank them then," the copper-haired man finally spoke. His voice was smooth, but deep, and made me feel sexy somehow. He had a strange expression on his face though, like he was trying to figure something out.
"Do you ladies mind if we join you at your booth? I think we'd all be more comfortable there," Jasper suggested.
"Sure," I knew my face was bright red again.
The next hour flew by as Emmett impressed Rosalie, Jasper charmed Alice, and Edward stared at me. He was gentlemanly, but I couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable that his eyes never left me.
"Have I met you before?" he finally asked.
"Um, no, not that I'm aware of," I said as I stared into my drink.
"Hmm. You seem familiar, but different somehow."
"Maybe I have one of those faces."
"No, Bella. You are way too beautiful to blend in." My face was probably the brightest red it had ever been. "You are even more beautiful when you blush." He raised his finger and brushed my cheek. I felt a spark as his hand left a cool trail down my jaw line.
I tuned into Emmett and Rosalie's conversation then. "You were there last week?" Rosalie asked.
"Yeah, we were playing pool. I can't believe you were there too. I would have thought I would have noticed you for sure," Emmett winked at her.
"Well, we were a little worse for wear. Bella was three sheets to the wind and then some," Rose teased and poked my ribs. I glared at her.
Edward was suddenly grinning. He reached over to the top of my head and gently pulled the wig from my head. "I thought it was you."
"Oh, God." I put my head down on the table and put my arms over my head.
"Bella, please don't hide your beautiful face from me," Edward said in a soothing tone as he smoothed the strands of hair he could get to through my death grip.
"What?" I said, still not looking up.
"I noticed you last week and wanted to talk to you, but you disappeared so quickly. I've thought about you all week. The wig threw me off, but I was hoping it was you."
I peeked up through my tangled hair. I saw the adoring look on his face, and it gave me enough courage to lift my head off the table.
"Your hair looks like a haystack. I kind of like it," Edward grinned and I nearly hid my face again.
"Bella, I'm so glad I found you again."
"Hey would you girls like to come back to our house for some papaya?" Emmett asked. We all started laughing.
"Um, Emmett, that seems a little random," Rosalie teased him.
"Well Edward's mother worries about us eating right so she enrolled us in some fruit of the month club or something so we have a shitload of fresh papaya at home right now we haven't the slightest idea what to do with."
I worked up the courage to say, "Well I guess maybe we could help with that. Does anyone even know how to eat a papaya? I mean do you peel it or what?"
"I have no idea, but we'll figure it out." Edward took my hand and helped me out of the booth. I felt the spark again and suddenly I knew that there was nothing else to be afraid of.
************
"That's the story of how we met kids," Edward added as I finished.
"That's why you eat papaya every year on your anniversary? I always thought that was really weird," our daughter asked.
"Yes, honey. That's why." I smiled up at my adoring husband and couldn't help but be thankful for the bet that started with a stool and a blond wig and ended with a papaya.