Love at First Slice
"I was stalking him, so what!" I admitted to my sister, Barbara!
"You do not stalk men who you think a 'yummy' Tracy"
I will just roll my eyes, what does she know? She hasn't seen him. He's so dreamy and the way he cut up Danko was amazing. He even tried to cut me up, like my Mom said… 'If he bully's you, he likes you' except he wasn't bullying me… I bet he likes me. Back to the slicing subject, I grabbed his arm and froze it. That was only 'cause I wanted to hold his hand.
As I was saying, Barbara was lecturing me on how 'its not right to pretend to be a Japanese man and say you'll fix his swords when you're really going to keep them under your pillow'
Ugh!!!! I totally had enough with her, so I walked out of the café. And you'll never guess what, I saw him. EEEPPP!!! I caught a glimpse of him, he was running so fast. I guess he was picking up his swords…
That's right; I said his swords would be ready by tomorrow, only because I wanted to see him again.
I'm not that stalky right? I don't know everything about him, not a name or number.
I am now walking home to clean off the blood off my new boyfriend's swords. Ah, Did I say new boyfriend? I meant that cute guy… He's not my boyfriend or anything!
Okay, so when I arrived home, I took out the swords from my pillow and held them up like they were gold or a precious baby. Not until a gust of wind came and they floated away from me.
"No, those Cute Guy's swords" I cried.
I went on my hands and knees and begged the mighty lord for them back. No such luck.
Now I have to go on a mission to find his swords, after I watch The Devil wears Prada.
---
After the Devil wears Prada…
That movie was a waste of 12 bucks, okay now to find that guy's swords.
Who can help me? Who has all the resources? … Noah Bennet!
I traveled to that Sushi Place in town. I saw his horn-rimmed glasses from a doorway away.
"Okay, I need info on that cute…ah I mean man who got the compass off you."
He sculled down some random Japanese drink.
"Hello Tracy ... oh that asshole? His name is Edgar something, that's all I know!"
Edgar huh? What an adorable name.
Any who, I left the Sushi Place. Thank you Bennet! I totally used him and he didn't even know it. He must be down because of the guy who is answering his wife's phone
FLASHBACK!!!!
"Tracy…can you a man named Doug, he's answering my wife's phone"
"Is he from building 26?"
"…Yes, yes he is"
NO MORE FLASHBACK
I will do that another day…
Now who can get his info off?
C.I.A? Nah, I had a fight with the head director's secretary.
F.B.I? Na, didn't I sleep with one of their bosses for Malden? Yeah I did …
Wait! Malden, he's with the government! … It's great to have people in the government to track down hot guys for you.
I called him up to hear… "Hello this Barbara, Governor Malden's secretary, can I help you"
O.M.F.G!!! That's right, text language. Barbara tells me not to be slutty *cough cough* she's sleeping with Malden… Well she answered his personal phone, *cough cough* I used to answer his personal phone after we …. Back to the talking…
"Barbara! I didn't you were sleeping with Malden?" I said happily.
The line was silent for a little while. Mwa ha ha ha. Take that Barbara, I have blackmail, FINALLY! Man! They should say orange mail 'cause blackmail sounds racist.
"Don't tell anyone Trace" My evil twin begged
Ah perfection, I am now complete again. All I needed was for Barbara to beg for something as she's so fricken perfect. Niki needed to beg for something as well, but she's dead.
"I won't, only if you get my information on a man named Edgar"
I rock, I honestly do. She faxed over his file. EEEPPP!!!!
SCRAPBOOK TIME!!!!
Wait, my mission was to find his swords, not him. Meh! This mission is better.
It said he's a carnie! A CARNIE? I've always wanted to marry a carnie and get free rides and cotton candy. It's just a childhood fantasy, well I still have carnival fantasies, *rolls eyes*
Using my knowledge, Carnivals are always on the run, so I have to track them down myself. 1 word…Google!
I typed in Sullivan Bros Carnival into Google. I'm so lucky they had a website.
Isn't it weird that everyone and everything has a website? Like I could search up Mr. Muggles and he would have his own website. Trust me… He did.
They're in Ohio. So I'm going to have to find someone with a transporting power.
Daphne Millbrook? Nah she's dead … DAMN IT!!!!
Hiro Nakamura? He's powerless.
Why does everyone have to be dead or powerless?
5 days later…
I'm here in Ohio and at the Carnival. I'm looking for the ring leader to tell me where he his, oh and I also need to find a bearded lady. After entering a tent which was full of jars of ink, I took off my cool shades and said…
"Hello, I'm Tracy, I'm looking for Edgar"
The guy was applying black nail polish at the time. He was blowing on his fingernails as he spoke.
"He's at the knife throwing stool"
I nodded and walked away from the weird man. Isn't he a little too old to be putting black nail polish on and trying to be 'hip' and 'cool'
I walked to the stool and saw my dream husband sitting down. I nearly died inside. Act cool Tracy, ACT COOL!!!!!
"Hey, I'm Tracy; you sliced me at Danko's place"
"Okay, I'm sorry I didn't know you were like a water bed"
"Ah, I'm also that Japanese guy, and I took you're swords home then um you're swords went missing"
He rolled his eyes at me. He's so cute when he rolls his eyes.
"Yeah, I know. I got them back off you, you thief"
He's already making up nicknames already?
"WILL YOU MARRY ME EDGAR?" I said to him.
---
I walked out of the Carnival, soaking wet.
Forget Edgar now, Me's angry with him
THE END