I know a lot about the world. That's probably because I have lived throughout it. I also know a lot about people. Probably because I observe people doing the simplest things. So then you would think I know a lot about the emotions that these people feel and I would be able to relate to them and feel them as well. I don't. I'm a logical thinker and there is nothing logical about the emotions that run through people so strongly that it makes them do stupid things. Stupid things like betray a friend's trust and fall in love with the one woman he loves. It's stupid and uncontrollable, maybe that's why I don't understand it, because I don't have control. In almost any situation I get myself into I get myself out by thinking logically but my love for ger is anything but logical because I went into this friendship know that he liked her and that I had no chance with her because she felt the same way. That didn't stop me though and here I am wrecking everything for a dumb emotion I should be able to control. But I can't, and while I say that out loud it still doesn't seem to click that I CAN NOT control my feelings for one a one, Lily Randall. For the first time in my life nothing makes sense and -it I can't stand the way being in love makes me feel, like you are literally falling. And yet I revel in it, I am in love with Lily Randall and there's nothing I can't do about it.