ch 1

EPOV

"Edward! Come on, ya gonna be late!"

Eric Yorkie and Tyler Crowley climbed over the fence as I, who fell behind, hesitantly followed in the dark, cold night. My hood pulled over my face, I gritted my teeth. How did I get here again? I thought I had been cured. I thought I could stop. I thought I could be strong, strong enough to stay away. But this night will turn into day, and that day will turn into night and I don't know how I am going to keep from suffocating.

I could hear my breath leaving heavily; I could see the white of it in the cold. It's probably midnight, I mused. I took my time. I was in no hurry. I didn't want to hurry. I don't even know why I am following these two as I did before.

In the distance, I could see Eric pull his hair through his oily black hair. I winced. How the heck did I end up with these two? We weren't friends. We were practically strangers. But we all wanted the same thing.

"Hey, where's Mikey?" Tyler asked. "Did he back out of the plan?"

I shrugged. I didn't care for any of them.

I climbed the fence, my fingers hitting the wires roughly. I easily got over, and I saw Tyler twinge in jealousy. But I didn't care. I was now getting restless. I was getting closer now.

Eric had gone ahead. Pretty soon, he jogged back, his breath heaving.

"He's here. You got the cash?" he asked between breaths.

I nodded. I fingered the money in my pocket. It would soon be replaced. Soon, I thought, I will have it. But I didn't want it. I hated it. But I needed it.

Now with a leap to our usually sluggish feet, we quickly passed the junkyard. I could see a cloaked man behind a car with a dented lid.

"Ya got them?" Tyler asked eagerly. His hands were trembling in anticipation. He, I noticed, was already handing over his money. Eric did the same and I, my hands trembling in something else, followed. We were then given the packages and the cloaked man disappeared.

"Oh yeah!" Eric yelled and gave Tyler a high five. They immediately took one of the bags and started to inhale the drug. I stepped back in disgust. I didn't know why this used to be so appealing to me. All I knew was that I hated it now. It disgusted me to no end. But I needed it. I needed the high. I needed the feeling, even though it would only last a minute. I needed a way out of my hated self. I had to be free from the suffocation of this cruel world. It was the only way.

"Give me a bag."

They ignored me and I took one myself. The drug was fast acting, and strong. Tyler seemed to go cross-eyed and Eric was squirming on the floor. Somehow this made me feel satisfied and hopeful. Maybe this one will make all my problems go away. I poured the powder on my dirty, oily rag and moved it to my nose.

Then I heard it.

woooOOOOOoooooowooOOOOOoooo

A police siren.

All of a sudden it seemed as if someone had punched me right in the stomach. All the air left my lungs and I immediately felt like someone was squeezing me. The fear of being caught, the knowledge of being caught hit me harder than any other drug I used. I turned and ran, leaving Eric and Tyler squirming on the ground, oblivious to anything. I wanted to run, run, run. But I couldn't. Just as it came, my energy left me. I collapsed to the ground, clutching the bag. I wanted to get rid of it, run away, get away from this life. But I knew, I couldn't. I had energy left only to hide under the nearest pile of junk. Then I passed out.

I was only gone for a short while. Pretty soon I awoke to the sounds of shuffling. The police were searching for me. I heard distant voices.

"I found two of them. The boy said there were three."

"Maybe the one of them backed out too."

I gritted my teeth. Mike, huh? So he was the one who ratted us out. Then I heard another voice. It was female. But that didn't make me stop breathing. She was close. My senses seemed to sharpen. Could I find another hiding place? Could I make a run for it? Should I escape, beating up the police as I go? I wasn't sure I could do any of these, but it was worth the try, right?

I got my foot out, when I heard footsteps. Way to close. I froze. The footsteps got closer.

"I found something!" I heard the policewoman say. I closed my eyes. I wonder what jail would be like.

I opened my eyes to see the huge, chocolate, deer eyes blinking at me. She seemed at a loss of words, but I didn't really notice. She was beautiful. She had a heart shaped face with smooth silky hair moving slightly with the wind. I opened my mouth to speak.

That was when the girl, she didn't seemed so much older than me, collected herself and stood up.

"I found him, he has some of the drugs, too."

I was still looking dumbfounded at the spot the woman had been. Then I remembered everything. I was going to be caught. I immediately got ready to take off. But it was too late. Two other policemen came in with handcuffs. They hacked it on to my wrists, it hurt. I heard a tiny gasp on my side, I recognized it from the woman.

As I was being taken to the car, I heard a man say, "Good job, Bella. That was a good first try."

I looked behind me as I saw the girl looking at me and the man who had said that walked away. Bella.

I got into the car, Eric and Tyler was in the other one. It was a small mercy. I was still going to be locked up. Next stop would be court.

It would be hard, living in jail. Too much time to think. The smell of the old and worn police cars suffocated me.

____________________________________________________________________________

BPOV

"Charlie!" I paused as I caught my hip on his desk. Silently cursing myself, I went on.

"Charlie, please! Just this once!"

My dad looked at me in the eye. It was something he did and something I was used to seeing. It was his interrogation look.

"Bella why? You barely know how to use a gun!"

"There's a first for everything, dad. And I learned during the police academy!"

Charlie sighed. "I'll think about it. But that doesn't mean I say yes!" He sat on his chair and grabbed a folder from a corner of his desk and started reading. It was my signal to leave.

I turned and walked to my desk. Paper clipping, stapling, filing, anything a paper desk person does. I hated it.

Right after I was done with high school, I went to college. At 22, I joined the police academy and took online classes. Since my dad was the Chief Police, I decided to take this job. It was easy to get in. Forks is a small place. I took online classes to finish my education.

I guess I took this job because then Charlie could see that I can handle the world. How wrong i was. I wanted to be free from the suffocating arms of Charlie's protection, the pressing memories of my past, the tedious pains of life.

As a police woman, I could to actually do something, but Charlie made sure I couldn't. Instead, I did paperwork all day. I was waiting all year for an excuse to get outside. So when we caught a boy selling drugs and he told on three other of his friends who does the same, I knew it was time. Charlie wouldn't let me do anything bigger, so I figured this small thing could be medicine for me. For a while. But I had to beg my dad for days though. Charlie was too worried about me.

Luckily, Angela, someone who I met while working at the police station, noticed me suffering from boredom and talked to Charlie for me. He had to give in.

Before I knew it I was in a police car, sirens blaring. Too loud for my ears. What do you know? I was nervous. Who wouldn't be? I felt even more suffocated in that tiny car, with Angela on one side, and another person next to me, fiddling with his gun. Angela looked over at me and smiled.

"You nervous?" she asked.

"Yeah." I looked out the window as we entered a huge, ominous junkyard. Typical. This was exactly how I imagined it would be.

The car quickly came to a stop and I knew that it was time to work. I closed my eyes, got out and pointed my gun immediately ahead of me. I opened my eyes to see a chuckling Angela move my gun away. I looked down and saw a disgusting sight. Two greesy and geeky boys were almost passed out, their bodys wiggling around in insanity. Their eyes were pained, but their mouths were in a huge and stupid grin. I had the urge to close my eyes again. Disgusting. Was this was what I was looking for? Was this supposed to make me feel free? It only reminded me of how stupid people can be.

I watched as people took the boys out of my sight.

"Take them away," I heard Charlie said. I could hear disgust in his voice as well, though he tried hard to disguise it. These new drugs were getting worse and worse by the second. I knew police from all over the world was trying hard to do something about it, but they could only get as far as we could. With more victims caught under the influence.

The rest of the team then started to fan out to look around.

"Where's the third one?" I heard someone ask.

"Probably hiding around here, high off the stuff."

I decided to help. Hands shaking from uncertainty, I walked across piles of broken metals and bars. Honestly, I had no idea what I was doing. Please don't let me be the one to find the last one, please. I played this over and over in my mind as I walked around. Already I felt sick. I wasn't close to the freedom I had wanted.

As I neared a car, I noticed something. A foot was sticking out. I froze. Was it...? I inched closer. No doubt about it. Something under the car started to tense, as if ready to start running, which was something I could definietely not allow.

"I found something!" I made sure to say before ducking my head under the car.

And I what I saw took my breath away. God, he's gorgeous. That was all I could think. My jaw dropped open and I stared as his green eyes looked into mine, searching. Immediately my heart started to flutter and I felt my hand rise up to touch the bronze locks around his head.

When my hand had risen an inch, I saw the boy open his mouth to speak. That was when I remembered who I was, what I was supposed to be doing. Wow, Bella. What am I doing?

I quickly stood up (colliding with the car bumper and tripping on my feet along the way) and called, my voice faltering a little bit.

"I found him, he has some drugs too." I took a peak at the beautiful man, but he was looking elsewhere, a troubled expression on his face. Guilt poured into me, but I reminded myself of my job and who he was. I left and joined my dad who had come with two other policemen. My dad took me back to the police cars. Again I peaked back to see the policemen handcuff the boy.

I forced my head back, telling myself never to look, not again.

"Bella, are you okay? Are you not hurt?" Charlie asked me, urgency in his voice.

I could only nod. I was still in shock. Charlie gave me a pat on the arm, trying to soothe me.

"Good job, Bella. That was a good first try."

I only nodded again when I saw the boy being brought into the car. Breaking my earlier promise, I stared, all I could. And I wanted, wanted so much. To know his name.

My heart fluttered and I let out a gasp when I finally felt the happiness I sought for for years.