First fanfic and it's only dialogue, have mercy please :) These boys belong to Arthur Conan Doyle.
"What is that?"
"It's a baby, Holmes."
"Yes, yes, I can see that. But why is it at our doorstep?"
"No idea. Do you remember ordering a baby?"
"Ordering a- really, Watson. You need to keep that pawky humor of yours in check."
"My apologies."
"It's crying now. Why is it crying?"
"Maybe she's hungry?"
"Maybe. Shall we make some tea?"
"Tea? For a hungry baby? Really now, Holmes."
"Well we are out of milk, what else are we supposed to do?"
"Anything else."
"I don't see you coming up with any ideas."
"Pick her up and see if it calms her down?"
"Me? Why don't you pick her up?"
"My hand is still sore from yesterday. Do you really have to practice your martial arts on me?"
"Who else? Mrs. Hudson?"
"Oh heavens, no. She puts up with enough already."
"Speaking of her, why did she choose this out of all god-forsaken weeks to visit her family?"
"Because you started practicing martial arts?"
"Fine, I'll pick it up then."
"She's not an 'it', Holmes. Mind her head."
"Yes, yes. You sound like a nanny. Have you considered becoming one?"
"Handling you is enough, thank you."
"Hmph…Watson, why is the baby gripping my hair?"
"I think she likes you."
"Well, I don't like her! Ouch!"
"Careful, you'll drop her!"
"And I'll go bald if this child doesn't let go of me!"
"Do stop yelling, you're scaring her. Rock her gently, maybe that will calm her down."
"... If you say so."
"..."
"…"
"She's asleep."
"Well done Holmes. Say, have you ever considered becoming a nanny?"