Dude Looks Like A Lady

by ChibiShiva

*YAOI* A man is waiting for the love of his life, and Kuja happens to be there at the same time.... Keep that in your mind: English is my second language, it may be full of grammar errors. I don't own Kuja or any FF characters.Please R&R

The following is what you get when mixing an Aerosmith song and a crazy author known as Shiva102: a stupid fanfic. It's not a songfic, and it's not Kuja-bashing either (love him too much.......). Just I thought he looked like a girl! I'm not responsible for any mental problems caused by this fic, reminds that it has a LOT af YAOI (m/m stuff).

I DON'T OWN KUJA (D-OH!) but I own "man" and I don't make money with them anyway.

Dude Looks Like A Lady

Kuja: *gets out of the Alexandria Castle*
Kuja: AHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! She's finally under my control! And those clowns... Zorn and Thorn.
I'm the best!!!!!!! MUAHHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!
Man: *stares at Kuja*
Kuja: What are you lookin' at?!
Man: You're a hell of a cutie, girl.
Kuja: S'cuse me, but I'm not your cutie.
Man: Sorry, girl. (She's damn hot.... but sooo serious)
Kuja: Look, I'm not a girl... I'm a-
Man: Very sorry, young lady. Wanna come to my house for supper?
Kuja: Food eh? OK, but for the last time I'M NOT A YOUNG LADY!!!
Man: *on a sarcastis tone* Yeah yeah... I believe you.
Kuja: *groans*
Man: So how old are you?
Kuja: *annoyed* 24. You?
Man: Me, I'm 35. You're so cute girl. I'll never stop staring at you.
Kuja: *screaming* I'M NOT A GIRL YOU-
Man: Stop screaming like that, cute girl.
Kuja: *whining* Ohhhh come on...

Time stops, except for Kuja.

Voice from the sky: *laughing* What's wrong... cutie?
Kuja: Who are you?
Voice from the sky: I'm the author of the fan fic, Shiva102.
Kuja: *whining* Make that nonsense stop pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease.....
Shiva102: Wait until the end. Alrighty?
Kuja: Oh man.......
Shiva102: Oups! I gotta go.... see ya later.... cutie!
Kuja: *sreaming* STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!! I'M NOT A CUTIE!!!!!

Time continues to flow.

Man: We're at my house. Sit down right here, I'll be back with delicious food for the cutest woman in
the world.
Kuja: *really annoyed* Look, I'm not a-
Man: So, are you from here?
Kuja: Nah. I'm from Terra.
Man: Terra? Never heard of it. But the girls are sure cute there if they're like you.
Kuja: SHIVA102!!!!!!!! COME HERE!!!!
Shiva102: *blowing raspberries*

Later that same evening....

Man: Could you come here, you cute thing?
Kuja: I'm not your cute thing, I'm nobody's cute thing.
Man: Come on, stop doing this.
Man: *points the bed*
Kuja: *turns white*
Kuja: I don't think this is a good idea...
Man: Why? Come on, get naked, baby.
Shiva102: *sings "Get Naked" from Methods of Mayhem*
Kuja: SHUUUUUUUUUT UUUUUUUUPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Shiva102: *stops singing*
Man: *gets close to Kuja*
Kuja: *backs off*
Man: *runs after his so-called cutie*
Kuja: *searching his breath* Stop........ it......... ohhhhhh ALL RIGHT, do what you want... I'm yours.
Man: *sigh* That's better.
Man: *starting to undress Kuja*
Kuja: SHIVA102!!!!! I'M GONNA KILL YOUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Man: *looks at Kuja, naked*
Man: YOU'RE A GUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why didn't you tell it before?!
Kuja: *incredibly annoyed, alomst in is Trance mode* What the hell do you think I tried to say every
time you were calling me "cutie", "girl" or something like that!
Man: I'm soooo sorry. BYE BYE...........
Man: *gets out of the house as fats as he can*
Kuja: *Casts Ultima two times, summons Bahamut, Odin, Atomos, Leviathan, casts Firaga, Thundaga,
Blizzaga, Meteor, kills the man.*
Kuja: *Faces Shiva102, smirks*
Shiva102: THE END!!!!!
Kuja: *relieved* That's better... *sarcastic* Now for you, I reserved the best. MWAHHAA MWAHAHA
Kuja: *Repeats the same magics, but doesn't kill Shiva102*
Shiva102: *blows rapsberries*

The real end.