A/N: One of my first TOA fanfics. I've read some pretty amazing stories on this sight and thought I should contribute to make this section larger. Not the amazing part haha- this story is far from that. I mean just increasing stories for everyone to read.

Well I won't bore with anymore words. Here's something to warm me up for other one-shots to write.

Summary: Asch tries in vain to stay far from his replica, but Luke is infuriatingly persistant. What started as just another starry night, soon turns itself into a rambunctious mess with Luke at its head. Asch just can't get away! Why exactly has Luke been stalking Asch?

Disclaimer: I own nothing except what little plot this one-shot possesses :]

Warning: Slight violence and language. Of course Luke in this story is...

Smiling Babies

The last ray of light from the sun vanished along with the golden sunset hue, replacing itself quickly with a shade of deep violet and blue. Luke paused as he registered the change from evening to night, straightening up from where he had been gathering firewood among the rustling trees and bushes of the woods. His gaze traveled to the sky where he could see the first signs of stars appearing, and a gentle smile crossed his face.

How many more of these will I see?

Luke shook his head and shifted the stack of firewood in his arms, walking in the direction of the camp he and the others had started to set up. A strange sensation of detachment flowed through Luke's body and he glanced down. His arm glowed slightly, fading in and out of sight before becoming solid once more. Luke sighed.

I'm really disappearing...

Luke entered the large clearing of their campsite, smiling at Tear as she approached. "I brought the firewood," he told her.

"Thanks," Tear smiled back. "Just give it to Jade. He mentioned something about wanting to take care of it..."

"Eh?" Luke thoughtfully looked past her to where the Necromancer stood smack-dab in the center of the clearing. Then he shrugged. "Alright." He cheerfully moved past Tear and headed to Jade. Guy and Ion were doing a last-check of the area to make sure it was monster free while Natalia rested on a sturdy log and Anise plopped to the ground.

Jade pushed his glasses higher up on the bridge of his nose as Luke came to a stop in front of him. "I was beginning to wonder where you had gotten off to," he commented.

"I wanted to make sure I had enough," Luke offered Jade the wood a bit sheepishly.

"Why thank you," Jade said. "This should be more than enough..."

Luke was a bit confused by the statement but nodded anyway. He looked to the cheagle drifting towards them."Meiu," he smiled kindly at the cheagle. "Will you start the fire when Jade's done setting up the firewood?"

"Of course Master!" Meiu happily floated around Jade's head.

"Hmm?" Luke glanced around the clearing, his attention diverted from the two. "Where's Asch?" he asked out loud.

Anise slung Tokunaga off her back. "Who knows? Probably off in some corner of the forest angsting."

"Anise!" Natalia gave her a stern look.

"What?" Anise shrugged. "It's the truth."

"You take that back," Natalia heatedly said.

"No way!"

Luke smiled and shook his head as a small argument started up behind him, walking with ease through the woods in the direction he knew Asch would be. They were kind of attached in a way that made it so they were always aware of one another. Luke thought it was great fun to use this to aggravate Asch and make a point of following him almost every single time Asch walked off someplace.

The time Luke stalked Asch when he went to use the bathroom was only one of the many instances the two had been through since Asch decided to tag along after the Tower of Rem.

Why exactly Asch had chosen to stick around for the time being, Luke was unsure. But it had given him enough time to think, as he and the group traveled to their next destination, and Luke had come to an important conclusion. He needed to tell Asch before his original could walk out on them!

Luke grinned. "I'll make sure he doesn't run from me this time," he vowed aloud.

A few moments later he broke past a thick array of tree branches and found himself wandering into a clearing smaller than the one they had set camp up in. Luke noticed Asch sitting on a log with his back turned to him, whittling with something in his hands. Luke nodded to himself in determination and started to creep towards the other red-head.

Asch closed his eyes and supressed a twitch. He could sense the replica coming. Dammit! I can never get away from him.

Luke quietly walked up behind the taller redhead, his hands behind his back and a tiny smile on his face. "Hey, Asch."

"What do you want?" Asch asked, not bothering to look at him. "I'm busy."

"Huh." Luke peered briefly over his original's shoulders, eyes widening. "I've walked in on you doing some pretty strange things Asch, but this is unexpected."

Asch grew irritated. "Shut the hell up!"

Luke stepped back and laughed. "What are you making?"

"Something to kill you with," Asch growled.

Luke smiled. "Well that's not very nice. I have something for you."

"Keep it. I don't want it."

"Sure you don't," Luke easily replied as he rocked back on his heels. "But if you don't accept it, I'll tell a certain princess that you were being mean to me. And we all know how that'll turn out."

There was a long moment of silence.

"All righty then~" Luke said in a sing-song voice. "I guess I have no choice."

Asch sighed in irritation, setting down the knife and block of wood he had been screwing around with before reluctantly looking over his shoulder at Luke. "What?"

Luke owlishly blinked at him. "Yes?"

Asch growled low in his throat. "What... did you want... to give me?" he gritted out.

Luke rocked back on his heels, innocently looking up at the starry night sky. "The hell if I know. I just wanted your attention."

Asch popped a vein.

"But now that I have your attention," Luke continued, bringing his gaze back down to the older redhead, "I have something important to say."

A vein began to throb and Asch had to physically restrain himself from getting up and slapping the replica in front of him silly. Oh how he would love to wrap his arms around that pale, little neck and strangle him until every last breath of air was gone from his body! It was a far-fetched fantasy he knew he'd never accomplish with Guy, Natalia, and Tear around- but it always managed to make him smile nonetheless.

But enough fantasizing! He had a replica to deal with.

"Tell me what you want and leave me alone already!" Asch barked, turning completely around to face Luke.

Luke frowned, thoughtfully eyeing his original. "Well this isn't going to work..." he murmured.

Asch refrained from rolling his eyes. "What, dreck?"

Luke brought a hand to his chin in thought. "I need you to get on your hands and knees Asch."

"..."

"..." Luke blinked, looking down at Asch who was giving him an eerily blank look. "What?"

"...Repeat that dreck."

Luke blinked again. "Repeat what?"

"What you just said."

Luke tilted his head to the side in confusion. "Get on your hands and knees?"

"Right..."

Luke wasn't sure what happened exactly, but one minute he was standing on his own, and the next a livid Asch was pulling him into a rough headlock. "Wha!"

Screw not killing him! Asch inwardly raged. "You're dead dreck!"

Luke struggled to break out of the tight grip around his head. "Ow! What are you doing? What are you so angry about?"

"Who the hell would do that!" Asch yelled.

"Ow, ow, ow! But Gu- ouch! Guy said that he and Master Van always did that!" Luke protested over the obnoxiously loud grinding of his original's teeth. "Would it kill you to try it?"

Asch pulled away with a snarl, fires burning in his eyes. "I'm not a donkey! And quit calling that guy 'Master'!"

Luke pouted, placing his hands on his hips after fixing his mussed hair and clothing. "I don't get what the big deal is. I just wanted to have some fun," he lightly complained.

"I'm going to kill you," Asch growled, fingers twitching.

Luke turned his nose up. "Che. You're so angry all the time," he complained. "No wonder your Fonons are disappearing faster than mine. If you smiled more like me you might live an extra day or two."

Asch popped a vein. "Oh really?"

Luke glanced at him, an uncharacteristic smirk on his face. "Aa."

"..." Asch placed a hand to his head, resisting the stronge urge to decimate the replica right then and there. Remember Natalia... Remember Tear... Remember Guy... he thought to himself, barely able to restrain his aggravation. He shut his eyes and took in a deep breath. Alright... I' can control myself. I'm not provoked by my replica so easily. Asch lifted his head and smiled to himself.

Only to find Luke directly in his face.

Asch looked at him silently, brow quirking violently.

Luke grinned widely and reached out with both hands, patting the sides of his original's cheeks with gusto. "So you can smile! Thank Lorelei! I thought for sure the babies you and Natalia would have would be doomed forever angsting..." Luke trailed off, thoughtfully bringing his finger to his chin. Then he smiled and looked at Asch, closing his eyes happily. "Now your babies will be just like me!"

A stricken look of horror flashed across Asch's face and he took a staggering step backwards. "No..."

Luke laughed, planting his hands firmly on his waist. "Even after I disappear my legacy will continue on in your bloodline!"

"W-What the hell are you talking about?" Asch uttered, the panic in him slowly dying down. Several veins appeared near his temple and he lashed his hands out, pulling the corner of Luke's mouth. "Replica-no-BAKA!"

"Waahh!" The corners of Luke's eyes swelled with tears. "What are you doing?"

Asch pulled tigher., brow furrowing angrily. "You and I are both going to disappear! There'll be no bloodline! I'll never have babies and neither will you!" he yelled.

Luke looked at him tearfully, causing his original to be taken aback. He had no idea that Luke was actually crying because of how funny Asch was when he was angry. He sniffled pitifully, and the next time he gazed at Asch, his original was mistakenly enveloped in a sparkle-hallucinated vision of a chibified Luke.

Asch ground his teeth together for several seconds and then averted his gaze with a scoff. "Tch. That's how it is. Just accept the fact that we're both disappearing and nothing will be left behind," he muttered.

Luke wiped his eyes. "Asch..."

Asch kept his eyes firmly rooted to the ground. "Leave me alone. I'm done talking with you," he said.

Luke hummed to himself, tilting his head slightly. Then his face brightened and he comfortingly pat his original on top his head. "It's okay Asch," he began to say. "You and I may disappear- but at least we'll disappear together. Maybe we'll end up with Lorelei and be able to always be by each other's side."

A dark aura slowly began to rise from Asch's body. "Damned dreck..."

Luke blinked. "Nani?"

Asch popped a string of veins and once again pulled his replica into a headlock. "You think I want to be stuck with you? No way in hell!" Luke gently laughed, successfully catching Asch off guard. Asch loosened his grip and looked down at Luke in minor surprise and embarrassment. "W-What?"

Luke gripped the arm Asch chokingly held around his neck, smiling a silly smile at the moist dirt beneath their feet. "Somehow... I get the feeling that you won't vanish Asch. If anyone disappears, it'll be me... And I think I'm okay with that. You deserve to live."

Asch's eyes swam with surprise. "Luke..."

Luke grinned, turning his head to fix his original with a cheery look. "You called me by my name," he happily said, a cloud of joy forming around his image. "We must be bonding~"

A shudder racked the length of Asch's spine and he hurriedly let go of his replica, making sure to back away several steps. "Don't come near me," he uttered.

Luke mock-saluted. "Hai!"

Asch found yet another vein popping. "Shut the hell up!"

Luke couldn't help but laugh once more, clapping his hands together and leaning towards his original. "This was such a good talk Asch! We should have more of these where no one but us can hear!"

Asch blanched. "Why are you so creepy?"

"You're creepier than me," Luke held up a finger, planting his other hand firmly on his hip. "How do you keep finding us? The fact that you and Master Van keep popping up where ever we are is ten times creepier than me and you talking!"

"I always know where you are. You're my replica and we share a bond," Asch pointedly said. Honestly, it's common knowledge...

Luke's eyes glittered and he lunged. "You finally admit it~!"

Asch stepped to the side, vein throbbing as his replica sprawled himself onto the soft earth. "I meant a bond through our Fonon frequencies dreck!"

Luke twisted his upper body around to look woefully at Asch, bringing a fist in front of his mouth and sadly casting his gaze downwards. "I don't understand Asch... we're practically connected with our souls." He snapped his head up at his original, bursting into crocodile tears. "Why don't you love me anymore!" he achingly shouted.

Asch stared at his replica, surrounded by nothing but a wave pure darkness. "Replica..." he warningly growled.

Luke sobbed into his hands harder. "Asch...Asch! I hate it when you leave me alone! Don't you know how weird Guy can be? He always insists on sleeping right next to me! He's my best friend and all, but he snuggles in his sleep! Do you have any idea how traumatizing that is?"

Asch rolled his eyes in irritation. "I don't care dreck."

"Boohoo- you're so mean!" Luke exclaimed. He dropped his hands into his lap, now sitting cross-legged and gazing at his original attentatively.

Asch was taken aback by the sudden scrutiny he was under by his own replica. "What is it?"

Luke rested his cheek in his palm, smiling. "Nothing."

Asch grew quickly annoyed. "It's definitely something. Tell me!"

Luke looked off in boredom. "I don't think I will."

Asch twitchingly smiled. "You... Hmph!" He turned away. "Whatever. I'm heading back to camp. Enough of your ridiculousness." He started to stalk past Luke's sitting form.

Luke watched his original walk by, grinning to himself.

And then he stuck his foot out.

"Nh-!" Asch ungracefully toppled to the ground, effectively crushing his nose and dignity in one go.

Luke's mirthful laughter filled the air. "Whoops."

Asch glowered, and against all better judgment, lunged at his replica.

Luke's eyes grew large but it was useless to try and run away in time. He found himself pinned beneath his original, with Asch's furious eyes boring into his own. And Luke found it all utterly hilarious.

"You just couldn't help it, could you?" he teased. "I knew you'd lose it eventually!"

Asch snarled. "Shut up! You're so infuriating!"

Luke had the gall to look wounded. "Me? But I've never done anything to you. Why are you so mean?"

"I'm not dealing with this," Asch snapped, starting to get up. "I'm getting as far away from you as I can!"

Luke smirked for the briefest of moments. "I don't think so."

Asch tried to stand, but Luke had firmly locked one of his legs with his own, making it extremely difficult to get to his feet. What the hell? Asch thought, baffled. Since when have the replica's legs been this strong? "Let go off me!" he angrily said.

Luke shook his head. "No can do. I've suddenly remembered what I wanted to tell you in the first place," he said.

Asch was slightly curious, but maintained his livid air. "Well?"

Luke looked into his original's eyes mischieviously. "Well..."

"Well...?" Asch impatiently pressed. "Out with it!"

"Smiling babies."

Asch almost lost his balance. He subconsciously leaned in and gave Luke a flabbergasted look. "Smiling...babies?"

Luke nodded his head in satisfaction, using his thumb to tweak his original's nose. "That's what I said, didn't I?"

Asch yanked his nose out of the replica's grasp, eyes narrowed. "What are you talking about?"

Lukes eyes grew cloudly, a distant look coming on to his face. He stopped his leg from keeping Asch in place, his body becoming relaxed as he gazed at the night sky of their world. "It's just that... I want all this fighting to come to an end. So many people have been lost; a lot because I was too wrapped up in myself and ignored your warnings. I didn't understand much, and I still don't know everything about this world. But-" he lowered his eyes to meet Asch's. "I want to keep it safe; I want to stop Master Van no matter what! And I'm sure that when it's all over I'll have definitely disappeared. I think people will be sad when I'm gone..." Luke sweatdropped. "At least I hope. Either way, I'm sure that before our work is done we'll have found a doctor somewhere who can help you with your Fonons. That way you and Natalia can be happy. She had to put up with me and my brattish self for so long- at the very least you and her should be able to get married."

Asch's brows furrowed, his forehead creasing. "You think that that is enough to ensure that I don't vanish?"

Luke was confused. "Huh?"

Asch sighed in frustration. "Nothing can be done about my Fonons. They're connected with yours." He fixed his replica with a vicious glare. "And I thought I told you to cut out all that self-pitying junk! It's just as stupid as you! It makes me sick!"

Luke frowned, the last few sentences flying completely over his head as he asked, "So you don't want to have smiling babies with Natalia? That's horrible! She'll be heartbroken- I'll be heartbroken!"

"I don't care what you'll be," Asch uttered, now pissed. He was having a hard time containing himself from finally lashing out...

Luke rubbed wet eyes. "Think of the babies," he pitifully cried. "Don't you want them to be happy? Don't you want smiling babies Asch?"

Asch's self-restraint lost itself and he growled ferociously, grabbing a fistful of Luke's short hair with a largely throbbing vein. "AAAARRRGGGGHHH! DON'T YOU EVER SHUT UP?"

Luke grinned despite the rough hold on him and he reached up to give one of Asch's fallen bangs a friendly tug. "But you make me so happy Asch. I just can't stop talking when I'm around you."

Asch's brow was finely decorated with a popped veins and he threateningly pulled a tightened fist back. "That's it!"

Luke's grin only grew broader and he tilted his head back, eyes traveling towards the direction of their unseen camp. "I'm calling Natalia!" he merrily taunted. "NATALI-!"

Asch swiftly brought a hand over his replica's lips.

"Oi- Luke, what have you been-" Guy cut himself off as he walked into the small clearing- and stared. In his head, the image before him had grown warped, and all he could see was his defenseless best friend trapped beneath the vicious, angry form of his original.

Luke looked at him pleadingly, his expression saying, 'Guy...save me.'

Asch's hand remained clamped over Luke's mouth, snarling at the blonde. "You'll never take him from me!"

Guy's fists clenched at his sides. "I..."

"Guy... Guy... Oi- Guy!" Luke's voice called.

Guy blinked and snapped from his daydream, shaking his head rapidly. He found both Asch and Luke giving him bewildered looks, although Asch seemed more disturbed than anything else. Looking more closely at the scene he could see that Asch was not trying to steal Luke's innocence, but instead was attempting to pull away from the other red-haired teen.

"Don't get any strange ideas," Asch snapped at Guy, moving off of Luke.

Guy raised his hands defensively, sweatdropping. "I'm not," he said, his previous imaginary thought guilty floating overhead.

Luke allowed Asch to climb to his feet, sighing quietly. He too pushed to his feet after a moment and brushed his pantlegs off. When he straightened up, he saw Asch already moving past Guy. "Wait!" Luke called. "Where are you going?"

"Back to camp," Asch replied without stopping.

Luke frowned slightly. "Asch..."

Asch paused. "You and I..." he cast a short glance over his shoulder, eyes locking with those of his replica. "We'll go together you stupid dreck. There won't be any smiling babies."

Luke's eyes widened. "Asch!"

"Tch." Asch quickly disappeared into the foliage of the woods, several branches from nearby trees swishing in his wake.

Guy raised a brow, looking after Asch in confusion. Then he turned and faced his best friend. "What was that all about?"

Luke brightly grinned. "... It was nothing."

The two friends began heading towards their campsite for the night.

"Smiling babies?" Guy mused aloud. "I don't get it."

"You're not supposed to," Luke kindly told him.

Guy grinned. "I guess so."

It was relatively peaceful and a short walk into the second forest clearing, and Luke and Guy soon found themselves standing at the edge of a brightly lit camp. Sitting on a log off to the side were Asch and Natalia, engaged in a small conversation that didn't look as if it were going anywhere. Ion knelt beside Anise with Tear a little ways off from them, Anise giving Tokunaga a few tweaks. Meiu was floating above Tear who was unable to contain her red cheeks at his adorableness. Jade was no where to be seen, but this wasn't unsual as the Necromancer tended to wander off. A large and somewhat unusual fire burned in the middle, drawing Luke's attention immediately.

"Ano... Guy?"

The blonde glanced at him. "What's up?"

Luke discreetly pointed at the fire. "I thought Meiu was suppsed to light the fire... but it's so big! Don't tell me he-"

"Ah! No," Guy waved his hands to assure his friend. "Meiu didn't do that. It was..." Guy twitched as if reliving a horrid memory. "It was Jade. He thought the fire Meiu made wasn't big enough, so he decided to use Fonic Artes..."

Luke raised his brows. "You look scared."

Guy hung his arms, a big block of depression smacking him over the head. "It was scary..."

"Oh? Talking about me are you?"

Both Luke and Guy jumped in surprise, turning on their heels to face the pleasantly smiling man behind them.

"H-How long were you standing there for?" Guy nervously asked.

Jade pushed his glasses higher on the bridge of his nose, eyes gleaming. "Long enough."

Guy sweatdropped. "Is that so? Well-" He hurriedly turned and grabbed a surprised Luke by the arm, beginning to backpeddle the both of them away from the older man. "We're going to hit the hay! Luke will sleep next to me of course-"

Luke's eyes widened. "I-IIIIIEEEEEEEE!"

Everyone in the clearing stared at him.

Ion was the first to speak, turning his attention from Anise to look at the red-head in concern. "Luke, are you okay?"

Luke wildly shook his head. "I- I refuse!" he hollered.

Guy was beyond baffled as Luke jerked himself out of his hold. "Luke?"

Luke looked at Guy with large, frightful eyes. "I refuse to sleep with you!" he shouted, holding his fists before his face and hiding behind them.

Tear flushed fiercely, looking at Guy. "Guy!"

Guy cocked his head, smiling somewhat sheepishly. "Luke... when you put it like that..."

Luke hid behind himself even more. "You're always so forceful..." he whimpered.

Guy twitched. "What are you talking-"

"Guy!" Natalia snapped, standing from beside Asch. Her expression was furious as she stalked up to Guy and jabbed him roughly in the chest with her finger. "How could you? Luke's only seven years old! I thought you were better than that!"

Guy raised his hands. "Hold on a second Nata-"

"You're just a pedophile!" Natalia declared.

Guy severely twitched this time. "A pedo-"

"Yeah, that's right," Anise looked at the blonde disapprovingly, laying Tokunaga on the ground in front of her. "You're an old man!"

Guy popped a vein. "Old man...?"

Tear, listening to the conversation with a heavy blush, kept quiet. Does this mean... that I'm a pedophile too?

"My, my," Jade joined in, walking towards the group forming in the center of the clearing alongside the camp fire. His eyes were gleefully trained on Guy. "It's looks like you're not such a nice guy after all." He smirked. "Do excuse my pun."

"Jade, even you?" Guy eyed him and then faced Luke. "You're a horrible best friend," he muttered.

Luke smiled. "Oh well. Looks like I'll be sleeping with Asch then."

This time everyone did a double-take, swiveling their heads in Asch's direction.

"Asch!" Natalia was affronted.

"Don't look at me!" Asch said to her. He turned his angry gaze to Luke. "Dreck!"

Luke innocently blinked at him. "Nani?"

"Don't nani me!" Asch yelled, cheeks red with anger.

Luke twiddled his thumbs, looking down. "Could it be... that you're embarrassed?"

Asch tried in vain to will the patches of fury on his cheek to disappear, but he couldn't, and soon Natalia along with everyone else was giving Asch looks of surprise. This is ridiculous! Asch inwardly raged.

Guy wasn't sure whether to be relieved or feel pity now that everyone was focusing on the peeved red-head.

Ion looked at Asch with his small brows lowered. "Asch... is this true?"

"Of course it's not!" Asch barked.

"Why so defensive?" Anise questioned, hands on her tiny waist. Her eyes widened. "It's true, isn't it!"

"That replica is an idiot!" Asch heatedly said. "And you shouldn't believe a word out his dreck mouth!"

Luke buried his face in his hands, heartbroken. "You don't care for me after all we've done?" he brokenly sobbed.

Asch's eyebrow twitched.

"Asch! I knew Guy was bad from the start," Natalia raged, "but you too?"

Guy looked at her, offended. "Bad from the start? That's you!"

Natalia faced him in all her fury. "I am the princess of Kimlasca! You've no right to speak to me that way!"

"Don't be mean," Anise defended the blonde, moving in front of him before Natalia could prey upon him. She turned her nose up. "Besides, it's the truth."

Natalia clenched her fists. "Anise..."

"That's not true," Tear spoke up in her friend's defense, frowning at both Anise and Guy. "Natalia should be able to say what she wants. She has the right in this situation."

"This situation?" Ion looked at Tear. "And what about you?"

Tear blinked. "W-What about me?"

Ion thoughtfully eyed her. "Aren't you the least bit angry with Asch? After all you like-"

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Tear cut him off, flushed.

"Oh but I think you do," Jade smoothly intervened.

"No I don't!" Tear lost all composure.

Guy triumphantly looked at her. "It's obvious!"

"And it's even more obvious who you like!" Natalia snapped at him.

Guy blanched. "What?"

"I said it before and I'll say it again... you're a pedophile!"

"I am not!"

The camp was in an uproar- in a manner only Luke could create.

Asch, through the chaotic fray, looked towards his replica who stood off to the side smiling. Somehow... I get the feeling he did this on purpose, he blankly thought.

Luke, sensing he was being watched, moved his gaze over the scuffle before the campfire and met his original's gaze. "..." he silently mouthed.

Asch's eyes narrowed. What?

Luke tilted his head back to look at the stars, grinning widely. "It's fun isn't it?" he loudly said. "These happy memories we're making."

Like magic, the bickering stopped, and all eyes landed upon the red-head.

Luke lowered his chin and gave all of them a grand smile. "Let's all have smiling babies!"

"EEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHH?"

A/N: Well that's it for now. Hopefully it wasn't all too bad ^-^u

Luke was of course OOC, but I can't help but like him like this in all his Parody glory. I do like Guy; he's one of my favorite characters. And it's because of that, that I will shamelessly pick on him (in a good way) and Asch (also in a good way). In fact... I'll pick on everyone!

...In good ways.

I might have a few more stories coming out. It's been a while since I posted anything on the site unfortunately.

:D