A/N: Inspired by Friday the thirteenth. :)
Summary:
We all live under the delusion that Friday the thirteenth is a day of the worst luck you could ever receive in a lifetime, but maybe the delusion is exactly that; a delusion. (Sam's POV)
Disclaimer: All rights go to the incredible Dan Schneider.
The Thirteenth
We all live under the delusion that Friday the thirteenth is a day of the worst luck you could ever receive in a lifetime. You wait to see a black cat or salt or whatever you think can cause bad luck. Sometimes bad things do occur on the day. You could get a flat tire, you could get dumped, you could be in a car accident, the possibilities are endless. It's not something you can control per say, but considering the number of outcomes of bad luck, a day has been dedicated to it.
For me, this delusion didn't seem like a delusion:
August 13th, 1999
I was only five. I remember sitting in a recliner, waiting for dinner. I was channel surfing, waiting for anything to grab my attention. You would think a five-year-old may be able to be easily entertained. That wasn't the case.
The next thing that occurred was yelling and screaming coming from upstairs. I can't remember what they said. I'm not sure I want to remember. I turned off the television and proceeded to the bottom of the stairs.
I looked up and saw my parents screaming at each other. I didn't know what to make of it. I just watched.
I saw my dad disappear and reappear only a few seconds later with a suitcase. He came down the steps, kissed my head and made his way to the front door. My mom joined me at the bottom of the stairs, trying to stop him. The last thing he'd say to her, the last thing I had ever heard him say was, "Don't worry, I'll be back."
My mom went upstairs.
She waited for months. No phone call, no appearance. He was gone. One night, I saw her looking at a picture of him by the fire place. She threw it in the fire. That's when I knew he lied. He wasn't coming back.
October 13th, 2000
Melanie was my best friend. We had become closer after he left. We stuck together no matter what. My mom was slowly recovering from the loss of her husband. He had left her. She didn't even know where he was.
Melanie left for boarding school. I remember hugging her. I didn't hear from her after that, until later on when she visited. That's why I had hated her so much, she left me alone, she didn't stay and help me through it. Even though I had my mom, I felt more alone than ever.
April 13th, 2001
I walked into my mom's room. She was in a red dress. I asked her where she was going. She kissed my head and told me she'd be back.
"You are coming back right?" I asked her. Someone else had made that promise and had been unable to keep it.
"Why wouldn't I?" She asked, questioning my question.
"Because Dad didn't come back." She hugged me and told me once more she'd be back.
She left and I was alone. I watched TV for who knows how long. I looked at the clock.
12:30A.M.
I hadn't even had dinner. I made it to the kitchen, grabbing what I could find and warmed it up in the microwave. To my surprise, I didn't screw it up. I had Macaroni and cheese for dinner that night. I fell asleep on that recliner I had sat in the day he left.
September 13th, 2002
I had been teaching myself to make my own food. My mom's absences grew longer. I had met Carly by then, and her dorky neighbor Freddie. Again, I ate Mac and Cheese that night. I tried to wait up for her, but sometimes she was out all night.
I had started to read the Newspaper. I was so bored, I didn't know what to do. I looked at the obituaries. It was saddening.
I saw a picture of my dad in it. He was working at some big law firm now. He didn't care about us. I threw the newspaper into the fire and watched it disintegrate in the flames.
June 13th, 2003
My mom had left me more times than she could count. She came back only for a short period of time.
I was at Carly's. Freddie and I were fighting. It had gotten a little too far.
He screamed, "MAYBE THAT'S WHY YOU'RE ALONE! MAYBE THAT'S WHY YOU'RE MOM'S NEVER AROUND! YOU CAUSE TOO MANY PROBLEMS!" I inched back.
I ran out of the Carly's apartment, balling. Freddie had tried to come after me, but he didn't succeed in catching me. I ran home and went to bed. Freddie hadn't known about by dad.
What if he was right? I kept repeating that in my head.
Maybe it was my fault he left.
February 13th, 2004
I had started being mean to Freddie. I was so upset with him. Then again, he hadn't known about my dad. Still, I had to take it out on someone.
I had finally told Carly about my dad. That was the first time she saw me cry.
I was home that day. I just got the mail and was looking through it. I came across a letter...
...from my dad.
I let my tears flow from my eyes. I crushed it with my hands. I threw it down, stepped on it. I collapsed onto the floor and cried out, "Why are you doing this to me? Why?"
May 13th, 2005
My mom hadn't been home in days. I had started taking trombone lessons. It was my mom's pathetic way of trying to turn me into Melanie.
I had heard a knock at the door that day. Part of me hoped it was my dad. It wasn't.
It was people from the state. They told me that they were putting an eviction notice on the house.
We were going to have to move.
He left, Mom became depressed, she went out to forget about him, which made her forget him.
"This is your fault! It's your fault!" I screamed, knowing he couldn't hear me.
January 13th, 2006
My mom had somehow gotten out of the notice.
My mom had returned and I decided I would have a chat with her.
"Mom, can I talk to you for a second?" I asked her.
"Sure, what do you want?" She said back to me.
I gestured for her to sit down.
"You are my mom," I started, "That's the one thing that hasn't changed since he left us," I breathed, "You can't leave me for weeks at a time like you have been."
"You just don't understand," She got up to go. I stopped her.
"Listen to me. He was my father! I trusted him! I thought he wouldn't leave. I thought that he loved me enough to stay," I had started to cry at that point, "He's gone, and you don't know how much that hurts! I want it to be okay! I want to stop feeling like I do! So, don't you dare tell me how much it hurts! I know!"
I ran outside before she could say anything. I went to Carly's.
That's the second time she saw me cry.
April 13th, 2007
I was almost thirteen. My mom was in court for her numerous speeding tickets. I was sitting in the room. We had a agreement. She wouldn't stay out for more than three days. One of the lawyers was running late.
"Sorry, I'm late, I just-" I turned to see the lawyer and he stopped to look at me.
My dad.
"Sammy?" I ran out again, not wanting to hurt.
I ran to Carly's apartment, but she wasn't there. I shrunk to floor.
June 13th, 2008
We had started iCarly by then.
My dad had sent me another letter. I threw it in the fire again.
I watch it dissolve as hot tears ran down my cheeks.
March 13th, 2009
I didn't want to know why. I saw him on TV. I was so angry.
I beat the TV with an old baseball bat. My mom came and saw me and she held me in her arms, trying to calm me.
August 13th, 2010
My mom had gotten engaged for the umpteenth time.
She came home and told me how excited she was. I couldn't think of anything but him. He hadn't made her that happy. Little did she know another letter came from him. After she went upstairs, I threw it into the fireplace.
That was the twentieth letter I had thrown into it.
May 13th, 2011
My mom and I had gotten closer. My sister told me how great she was doing. Freddie had started being nicer to me. It was like I wasn't scary anymore.
My mom did get hit by a drunk driver that day. I thought she was going to die. I cried in the hospital.
The thought had dawned on me that I might really be alone this time.
July 13th, 2012
My mom survived the car accident, which made us grow even closer.
Freddie knew about my situation. We had dated for a while. For the first time, I was really happy. We broke up only after a few weeks.
So, much for happiness...
I waited for my bad luck, as people occasionally do on Friday the thirteenth. It hadn't come yet, but I knew it would.
Freddie came over, Carly was out of town and told us we should "spend some time together". Yeah, well, that's Carly for ya. She thinks she can mend old bonds.
We were eating popcorn when I heard a knock at the door. I walked over and opened it.
My dad.
Well, there's my bad luck.
"Get out!" I yelled at him. Freddie looked in my direction. I gestured for him to stay back.
"Sammy, just hear me-" He started, apologetically.
"No and don't call me that!" I stood and finally realized this was my chance to tell him how much he hurt me by leaving, "You left! You promised you'd come back and you didn't! I wanted to play baseball with you in the yard and for you to yell at my first boyfriend for not being good enough for your daughter! I wanted you to be a father! My father! But you weren't, you will never be one!"
He replied with, "But I still am your-" I cut him off again.
"No!" I said throwing my popcorn to the ground, "You aren't! You weren't here! I will never forgive you! For the first time, I'm calling the shots. My first one is telling you to get out and don't ever bother me again!"
"I promise you I'll change. I love-" I held back tears. This was hard, but it was something I had to do.
"Don't make another promise you can't keep. I don't love you." I shut the door on him. A moment later I heard him drive away.
I collapsed to the floor and started picking up popcorn of the floor. Freddie knelt beside me, "Sam."
"I have to...clean this up." I was frantically trying to pick it up, trying to mask my watery eyes.
"Sam," He picked me up and I fell into his arms. I cried into his shoulder, "I'm so proud of you."
I had never heard that before. I pulled out of the hug, "Thank you for being here."
I looked into his eyes, "I haven't had this good of a Friday the thirteenth for thirteen years."
"I love you," He said. Looking into my eyes deeply.
Although, I was shocked at first, I responded, "I love you too."
I slowly kissed his lips. That's when I knew that I was going to be okay.
Like I said, we all live under the delusion that Friday the thirteenth is a day of the worst luck you could ever receive in a lifetime. Although, delusions don't last forever. Sometimes, you gotta hang on until the end.
I was finally happy.
September 13th, 2019
Freddie and I were married. My mom remarried and was finally happy. I had gone to the doctor earlier that day and was waiting for my husband to get home.
He walked in and I hugged and kissed him as usual. I then asked him to sit down.
"I went to the doctor today," He nodded in understanding, "I'm expecting."
He automatically knew what I meant, "Are you serious? This is great!" He picked me up and spun me around. I had never been so happy.
Maybe the delusion is exactly that; a delusion.
Maybe Friday the thirteenth wasn't so bad after all...
A/N: Happy Friday the thirteenth! Hopefully it's happy! Thanks for reading!