What if:
Middle-Earth was one of many planets a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, and it was simply a very primitive and more-or-less undiscovered one.
The Jedi won the Clone Wars. The surviving Jedi were then sent throughout the galaxy to find new Jedi for training.
Obi-Wan Kenobi was looking for new Jedi and was ready for a new Padawan himself.
Eldarion, the son of Aragorn was strong in the Force and was chosen as Obi-Wan's Padawan.
That is the basic synopsis. It is not in subject especially humorous, though it may well sound that way. It is simply a new crossover of two of my favorite things.
The scout's breath crystallized in the early morning air as he yawned himself into alertness. He slowly rubbed a kink out of his right calf, the price of trekking up the mountain in the cold. The sun was just showing its first brilliant rays when the scout spied a bright streak on the horizon. The light brightened and appeared to be headed to a point near him. Instantly he thought of a falling star and how the Elves and Dwarves made good blades from them, but as the bright streak approached he began to have second thoughts. The object was slowing down. By the time it was nearly upon him, it had slowed to a stop and was settling slowly in the hollow below his perch.
Shakily, he descended the winding trail, keeping his eyes on the shiny object. It appeared to be made of solid metal, but was as large as most houses, though strangely shaped. As he neared it he began to hear various odd hisses and chicks. He stopped and eyed the object from about fifty paces away. He jumped when he heard a grating noise and a piece of the object broke of, swinging down to reveal a pair of shiny leather boots. The boots began to descend the new ramp, followed by tan trousers and the rest of a man dressed in a dark brown cloak and hood.
The scout hesitantly drew his sword, unsure how to deal with this stranger. The man kept his hands at his side and appeared to be unarmed. Only a metal rod slightly over a foot in length hung at his wide leather belt.
"I mean you no harm." With a small hand gesture, the scout realized that the stranger was telling the complete truth. He quickly sheathed his blade and bowed in greeting. "You will bring me to your king." The scout nodded and began walking back down the trail he had so recently traversed, all thoughts of his post forgotten.
Eldarion sighed, reveling at the magnificent view before him and the strong warmth of his father beside him. He breathed deeply of the cool morning air, unaware that this was his last normal day of his normal life in Middle-Earth.
The day had dawned cool and its touch left the boy's cheeks rosy. He placed one of his chilled hands inside his father's big, warm one.
The king looked down and smiled, squeezing his son's hand tightly. Suddenly he stiffened. Across the Rammas, coming north from Lossarnach was the day scout. He strode as if under strict orders and following close behind was a man cloaked and hooded. Aragorn lifted his small son onto his shoulders and strode swiftly from the Citadel. In the stables he placed Eldarion on Brego's withers without bothering to saddle the stallion. Leaping up behind his son, he sent the horse down through the levels of the city, hooves clattering on the cobblestones. As he rode, he called the soldiers to arms. By the time he reached the huge mithril gates, he had a score of mounted and foot-soldiers in his wake. When he reached the two walkers, he reined Brego in and stared sternly at the scout.
"What is the meaning of leaving your post?" The scout looked up with a slightly dazed expression and fumbled for an answer under the king's harsh gaze.
"It was on my account, Sire." The hooded stranger bowed slightly and gently pushed back his hood. "Greetings King Elessar Telcontar."
Aragorn urged Brego closer to the newcomer. "How do you know me, when I do not know you?" He asked gruffly.
"I know your many names, Sire, surely you don't require that I use all of them." His eyes twinkled merrily.
Aragorn grinned. "You have yet to answer my question. How do you know me, and my names?"
"I am Obi-Wan Kenobi. You, Lord, are well known where I come from."
"And where would that be? You come on foot and unarmed, even in this time of peace, that invites trouble. Is your land peaceful?"
"My land is riven with strife. That is why I am here on my errand. It is a complicated matter for you to understand."
"Let's try to make it less complicated so I am more inclined to trust you."
Obi-Wan grinned and nodded. "I suppose we should at that. I am from beyond your planet." He paused to let that penetrate. The soldiers shifted uneasily. Aragorn looked at him with brief disbelief.
"Go on." He managed, still willing to try to understand.
"I am part of an Order of beings called Jedi. We are the guards of planets and recruit young people from them to join our Order. Several Elves from this planet have joined our ranks over the years."
"How do you watch us? How do you travel?" The king's eyes shone with interest.
"The instruments we use to survey your planet are beyond your grasp of knowledge." Before Aragorn could become angry, he went on. "We travel in starships like the one left in the valley this scout was patrolling. We are able to cover huge distances in very little time."
"Do you have any proof of your words to show us, Lord Kenobi." The Jedi's eyes widened.
"Please call me Master Kenobi, or simply Obi-Wan. 'Lord' holds a very different meaning among the stars. In answer to your question: no. I don't truly have proof of my words. Only my transport on its landing site. What does your heart tell you?"
Elessar nodded. "You speak the truth. Now, why are you here?"
"Why else? To recruit more younglings to the Jedi Order." He held up a hand. "Before you protest or ask anything else, allow me to explain a bit more. We search for younglings who use the Force without any knowledge of it. It is a trait essential to a Jedi." He noted the questions in the eyes of his audience. "Ah yes, the Force. It is a power that flows in everything in the universe. It sharpens reflexes and gives strength to those who know how to use it."
"So, you came here to wrest our young from us? You will meet strong opposition, I assure you." He brandished Anduril subtly.
"Not so! I came to search for the Force. If it is found among any of the younglings, consent will be asked before taking the child anywhere."
"And how do you find this 'Force'?" Aragorn was still doubtful and wary.
"Usually it has been found among those with Elvish blood, yet we have been informed that most of the Elves have left Middle-Earth. It is a mystery as to where they have gone." He shook his head.
Eldarion grasped the silky mane in front of him and gazed at the man. His light brown hair was clipped short, but his beard was fuller than Aragorn's. His eyes gleamed piercingly blue. His face was kind, yet worn with some past struggle. He spoke with a very precise Gondorian accent.
"You have not told me how you find the Force in people." Aragorn's voice carried an edge of authority and the stranger met his eyes in silence for a few seconds.
"Indeed, I have not. It is truly very hard to explain. I, as a Jedi, can feel the Force flow through others. There are also certain tests that can be carried out involving a few drops of blood. Also one can be tested for outstanding reflexes."
"Enough of standing uncomfortably. Come to the Citadel." At his glance one of the soldiers quickly dismounted and led his horse to the newcomer. The Jedi mounted smoothly and the mighty war-steed was calm at his touch. The cavalcade trotted back across the field and through the gates, leaving the bewildered scout to walk back to his post.
As they passed upward through the city, the soldiers began dropping off until, at the seventh level it was only King Elessar, Eldarion and the Jedi.
When they were properly seated and drinks were placed before them, Aragorn insisted that Obi-Wan tell him more of his errand.
"There have been Jedi from this planet before," the corner of his mouth crinkled, "from Middle-Earth. They were Elves mostly and one Vala, long ago."
"Wow! Which one?" Eldarion's eyes were large in amazement.
Obi-Wan turned his kind eyes on the boy and addressed him. "The Vala was Tulkas. He was a very mighty Jedi, but he left the Order and returned. He loved this land too much. And, I think, he enjoyed tormenting Melkor." All three of them grinned at that. "As I said before, there is turmoil in the galaxy and the few remaining Jedi have been sent to the far planets in search of more apprentices. I knew that Jedi had been Elves of Middle-Earth, and I knew, also, before I came, that most of the Elves have disappeared. However, it is rumored that many Elves have interbred with humans." He grimaced a bit at the touchy wording. "I am here to observe the offspring of such unions."
Aragorn and Eldarion exchanged glances.
If Obi-Wan caught the glance, he did not show it. "I understand that you, Lord Aragorn, are a descendant of an Elf union." He gaze strayed to Eldarion and back. "And that you married an Elf."
Aragorn shifted uncomfortably, but was unable to bring himself to dislike the stranger. "You speak the truth."
Obi-Wan nodded deeply. "Will you allow me to study this young Prince and other young children of this city?" His eyes were wells of honesty, radiating calm and reassurance.
"You may, though I know of no other young people with the blood of Elves." Aragorn briefly thought of the Hobbits, but decided not to mention them to the Jedi.
Obi-Wan nodded eagerly and rose from his seat.
"I shall assign you a guide as you wander about the city." Elessar glanced at his son. "Eldarion will lead you. He knows the ways and has access." Eldarion grinned: his father knew his desires so well! Obi-Wan grinned as well and placed a hand on the boy's shoulder. "I will converse with the Queen." The king strode from the room and his footfalls dissipated along the paved corridor.
"Were would you like to go?" Eldarion asked, straining his neck to look the tall man in the face.
"Lead me wherever you please, young one." Eldarion found that the merry twinkle in the blue eyes never left, nor did the wry grin. He nodded and quickly thought aloud of the places to visit.
"Well, there's the Citadel itself, the first beacon, the sixth level smithy, the third level bakery, the guard house, the gate house…" He trailed off. "Any of that sound good?"
The Jedi nodded. "Each and every." As they started off, Obi-Wan voiced an observation. "You speak very well for one so young."
"Well, yeah! I'm the Prince, and as such I am well educated. I speak Sindarin too, and Legolas and Mama are teaching me Quenya. And I keep asking Gimli to teach me words in Dwarvish, but he's stubborn. Dwarves don't like to tell about their speech."
"Do you like learning languages?"
"Oh yes, very much. It's easy, and then I can talk to more people. Do you know many languages?"
"A few." The Jedi said. Young as he was, Eldarion sensed the understatement.
It became increasingly clear to the four-year-old that the stranger was less interested in Minas Tirith than he was in asking Eldarion questions. The questions came thick and fast. Questions that, to Eldarion, had nothing to do with anything. Instead of making him angry as they might have an adult, Eldarion enjoyed answering and asking questions of his own. He found that his audience was very willing to listen to what he had to say. So Eldarion told Obi-Wan all about how Legolas had made him a small bow of yew and taught him how to shoot it. And how he was now quite able to hit anything he aimed at. When he was asked, he excitedly told the Jedi about his experience with animals. How he had a pony of his own from Eomer King of Rohan. How he could sense the pony's moods and soothe him. And also how he could help with the mighty war horses, calming them with softly-spoken Elvish and a gentle touch. The Jedi would nod and his eyes gleamed with interest as he listened intently.
"Eldarion, would you like to know about where I come from?" The man had seated himself on a stone bench overlooking the Rammas.
"I would!" Eldarion glanced at the clear blue sky. "Did you really come from the stars?"
"Indeed. I came from a star very far away. From a world called Coroscant where the rest of my Order resides. There was a great war and many Jedi were killed while trying to bring peace to the galaxy."
"So you fight with bows and swords?"
"Well, in a way. The weapons we use are very much more powerful than any here in Middle-Earth. The weapon of the Jedi is a saber made of light. It can cut though anything but another saber. Many others use what ate called blasters." He shifted. "They can be likened to bows. One holds a blaster in one hand and it fires a bolt of energy that can burn through a man."
Eldarion was wide-eyes. "Not made of wood and metal?"
"No. As I said it is very different from anything you have ever heard of."
"So where is your sword of light? I don't see any weapons." Eldarion, puzzled, glanced over Obi-Wan in case he had originally missed something. His eyes followed the Jedi's right hand as it came to rest on that peculiar rod of shiny metal.
"This is my lightsaber. I will not light it here and now. It is dangerous and fearsome. Soon, when your father is present, I will show you."
They were interrupted by the clatter of quickly approaching hooves. Turning they could see a young horse careening down the narrow lane, several mounted stablemen in pursuit. As the horse neared, it shouldered aside a tall cart, sending it flipping toward the ledge where Eldarion and the Jedi were seated. Both leapt up and the Jedi executed a neat front flip over the shattered wheels, landing lightly on the ledge. Eldarion, however, ducked before Obi-Wan could snatch him out of the way. He ran straight for the rampaging horse. Quicker than the normal human eye could see, the boy was upon the horse's withers, leaning up the neck and whispering into its ears. Obi-Wan was not, however, and normal human. His Jedi abilities allowed him to see exactly how the boy had managed to gain the horse's back. Placing one foot on a spinning wheel of the cart and using that flimsy support for leverage, he had pushed himself up toward where the horse was soon to be. Snagging a strand of mane and using the churning near front leg he had swung astride.
Obi-Wan jumped the crushed cart and placed a hand on the now-settled beast's neck. He gazed at Eldarion, still not quite believing what he saw. By this time the stablemen had caught up and were thanking Eldarion and Obi-Wan profusely. Eldarion grinned at the praise.
"Will you be nice to her?" He asked, fingers still twined in the flaxen mane.
"Yes of course, Prince. No harm has come of her and none will come to her." He bowed slightly and fastened a lead about her head.
Obi-Wan lifted Eldarion from his perch and they watched as the man led her back toward the stables. The other two began to help the owner of the cart pick up the mess. Discretely, Obi-Wan added his Force powers to aid them in lifting the awkward bulk even as he lent his own muscles.
When the street was properly cleared again, Eldarion and Obi-Wan headed back to the Citadel.