They named the sea a goddess for a reason. The Izabella could lift you up or drag you down in accordance with her own will just like the gods could give him hope and life and just as quickly tear it away again.

The goddess pulled him down and held him and swirled and confused him until he couldn't hold his breath for a moment more, then she would throw him up, gasping. Again and again. Yet continuously swept him along on her currents.

He passed hours swiftly (and it had been hours) and he shivered uncontrollably (because she was cold cold cold) and he had a few good curses in his repertoire that he had strung together in prison, but he kept them to himself. Partially because he was underwater a majority of the time…but mostly because she kept the beasts of the deep from eating him like carrion.

There was about three seconds (while he was sucking in lungfuls of air) where he noticed the rapidly fading stars and constellations (he'd made them up himself of course) and figured he was passing the Twilight Palace and Babilonium. Immediately and completely on accident he thought we do seem to be swimming along speedily. I hope we don't crash land. And despite his best efforts, he laughed.

And then she struck his head against a rock, thoroughly unpleased.

What seemed a second later he was washed up on a beach (and he was for certain he had never been there before) because he could see the sun.

His first thought was that it was yellower then he had imagined.

His second was that he was starving and thirsty and exhausted, and that there was nowhere to go because what was the point? It wouldn't be long until the sickness took him over again anyway, and this was as good a place as any for his last memories to be.

So he spent his time in awe of the daylight half of the Abarat. Nobody had ever told him the sun was warm (or was that the sand?) and when did clouds get so white? The moon was white, the stars were white, and clouds were grey. This was just surreal.

He made a point to notice that he hadn't moved and yet the goddess washed over only his feet. (Were there tides in the Abarat?) Of course not.

"Thank you" he said aloud, "for crash landing me here." She didn't answer of course.

He wondered if the Izabella could truly pass judgment on someone as she seemed to. Had he passed some test—was this daylight island a gift? Or was a slow and agonizing fall into his personal beast the Izabella's version of 'just desserts'?

Perhaps so. He had witnessed the terrible end of Carrion as the goddess ocean choked the life out him. (But he preferred not to recall the image)

And he had (maybe) witnessed as Candy Quakenbush was buoyed away on a bubble of water. When he thought harder he realized she had definitely been buoyed away from him. And this sentiment was not good for his morale (because, truly, there was no one in all of the Abarat that he could trust, and Candy was the only one who (possibly) trusted him (maaaybe).

He had kidnapped her twice and delivered her into the waiting arms of Christopher Carrion the Lord of Midnight.

He reworded it to make him feel better. "I am Letheo, assassin-in-training and the former favorite of the nightmare king. And I captured Candy twice when Otto Houlihan could not!"

That definitely made him feel better. And there was also the fact that she was very forgiving. She had forgiven him once. She really had no business saving him from a beast of Efreet (now that was just plain crazyness). She would probably forgive him again.

But (really) he had no business stepping between her and Carrion. Or her and that tiny yellow crazy guy. "That was pure stupidity."

…But she was so kind, and true, and a whole bunch of other words that he wasn't allowed to say (or feel).

"But I can say them now, can't I?" He took a deep breath. "She's beautiful." The word sounded so malformed coming from his undeserving lips. He almost didn't continue.

"She's beautiful. And she makes me happy. And she gives me hope." He didn't dare say the last unspeakable because the fear of getting his lips stitched together was still too real.

Then it happened. It was inevitable. It felt like someone were branding him, and his heart seared and scarred and beat fire, and his skin purpled and melted and reformed into white hot scales, and the first onslaught of the pain shuddered through him.

Unbuttoning his soldier's jacket, he watched as more of his skin bruised and morphed. He pressed his fingers lightly to the newly formed scales, barely feeling his heart beat hollowly beneath them. Then he cursed.

He let out every curse he'd ever heard in every tongue he knew and then he repeated them in different strings. He cursed Carrion and the Hag and the damned green thuaz and the fucking pain and the god forsaken beast he carried around inside of him. But most of all most of all he cursed the scales.

She had knelt beside him, and for a split second had cared about him, and because of his scales he had not felt the soft skin of her hand. As she had stroked his face he could not feel her.

And he never ever ever would.

I disclaim any rights at all to Abarat and its characters. They belong to Clive Barker who I wish would hurry up and finish writing the series.

So. This was definitely not supposed to be a sad oneshot. This was supposed to add a little LetheoCandy to the fanfiction archive. This was supposed to end happily. I don't know what went on when I was writing this.

Also, I didn't edit it at all. Just straight up wrote it. So if it sounds choppy, oh well. Chalk it up to artist's subconscious intent.

Background stuff: I wrote "gods" at the beginning because I was confused as to what the people of Abarat believed. I thought "gods" was the safest way. (I know at one point Carrion mentions a heaven)

2. Not sure if Carrion is dead or not, but whatever. I have assumed.

3. The fourth "unspeakable" is love. Carrion got his lips stitched up for saying it. Anyway, I don't think Letheo is in love with Candy at the moment, but he must like her to some extent, right?

4. I'm going off the idea that Letheo needs his medicine for life, and that a swig from the bottle won't cure him forever. I also assumed the bottle got lost somewhere when the Wormwood exploded or it's with Carrion or something.

5. The book says Letheo goes "mindless" when he's fully bestial, but he also tells Candy that when "it takes over completely, it's horrible." So I'm guessing that the battle with Wolfswinkle shows that he can toggle the mindlessness and the rational thought. In this oneshot I think Letheo's going to give in so he's not in terrible pain until he starves to death or whatnot.

Anyway. I guess I'm having an unneeded rant here, but I am truly annoyed that Barker won't get on with publishing the third book. I'm also annoyed because I have a feeling Letheo will have a backseat role in the third book, regardless. Barker brought him in with Carrion this book, and now Carrion's gone. Letheo will be a troubling character to keep around unless he has his medicine and joins the group. And having all that take place will be troublesome, so I have this feeling that Letheo might pull a John Mischief and disappear for awhile (though I sincerely hope I'm wrong, Letheo is definitely my favorite character).

Bah.