Prompt: Holly finds out about Gail's kidnapping.
Gail had never done anything remotely adventurous in the bedroom. That was, until she started sleeping with Holly. There was an entire drawer of the forensic pathologists dresser dedicated solely to various types of sex toys, mostly strap ons, which had freaked Gail out a little the first time Holly opted to keep her mouth free for kissing and her hands free to roam. The more time they spent together, the more open Gail had become to trying new things. She had taken to sliding on a harness quite happily once she discovered how it made Holly moan as if a July first fireworks show was being ignited within her. All of it was fairly standard from what she knew of girl on girl lovemaking.
There was little to no warning when in the midst of their foreplay, Holly dug out a blindfold and a pair of handcuffs.
"I thought I was the one who carried handcuffs." Gail joked as Holly returned to kissing her neck with the bondage in hand.
"Are you okay with this?" Holly asked between kisses.
"If it was anyone but you asking that question, I might consider saying no. But you just look so hot holding those cuffs." She smirked at her girlfriend, enjoying the thought of Holly arresting criminals and throwing them behind bars.
"If you don't like it, just say so. I don't expect you to do anything that makes you uncomfortable." Holly promised as she bound pale, thin wrists to slats of her headboard and slipped the blindfold over Gail's piercing blue eyes.
"I'm fine." The blonde nodded as the beautiful sight of long dark hair hanging over the soft tan swell of Holly's breasts disappeared from above her. She quickly felt the warmth of a soft mouth on her breasts and fought the need to hold onto Holly.
She tried to focus on the sensations of the here and now as her breath quickened in the darkness, but all she could think about was the clicking of wing-tipped dress shoes on concrete cellar floors and the feeling of firm hands inside nitrile gloves gripping her arm as a needle was shoved into her vein. The worst came when she stopped feeling Holly touching her altogether. She thought she was losing it when she could actually feel the sensation of hands gripping her shoulders, but Holly quickly reaffirmed that they were her hands by speaking.
"Gail? Are you alright?" She wondered, realizing that the quick shallow breathing and tense muscles were not the result of pleasure or excitement.
She gulped and tried to get rid of the swollen feeling in her throat so she could speak to tell Holly she needed to see her face, but it wouldn't go away, which only made her panic more.
"Gail, Honey, I think you're having a panic attack," Holly explained, swiftly removing the blindfold and grabbing the key to the cuffs off the nightstand. "Relax. Breathe. It's okay. I'm right here."
Gail tried her best to sit up on her own and felt around for Holly's embrace through vision that was thickly clouded with tears. It took only seconds for Holly to move from in front of her to next to her on the bed, where she could support Gail's upper body as she gasped and tried not to pass out.
"I'm sorry." Gail choked out as she buried her face in Holly's shoulder.
"You have nothing to apologize for. Try to take some deep breaths or you're going to faint. It's alright. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I should have given you more warning." She reassured, kissing Gail on the head as she pulled her tighter against her body.
"It wasn't your fault. It was my stupid brain." She explained, blinking away tears and lifting her head to meet Holly's gaze.
"Hey, hey. Just give yourself a minute to calm down. Just focus on me. I promise it's gonna be okay." Holly watched Gail's eyes dart in and out of contact with hers as she cradled her face gently.
"Uhm, water. Can you get me some water?" The blonde asked, still trying to catch her breath.
"Of course. Are you okay while I go get it?"
"Yeah. I just need a minute to catch my breath." She nodded.
"I'll be right back. Just shout if you need me." Holly pressed a firm kiss on Gail's forehead as she detangled herself from her arms.
Gail nodded and took a deep breath, trying to hold it together as the body that was anchoring her to reality disappeared.
"Do you want to talk about what happened?" Holly asked as she handed a glass of water to a now semi-calm Gail.
"I didn't think I was gonna freak out like that... It didn't even occur to me that the last time someone restrained me, I was fighting for my life." She shook her head and sipped from the glass, glad Holly had taken the time to remember that Gail preferred her water with ice in it.
"You know you can talk to me about anything." Holly reminded her.
"A few years ago, the same day Jerry Barber died, a killer named Ross Perik abducted me from Andy McNally's apartment and tied me up in his cellar." Gail explained.
"I can't imagine how terrifying that must have been for you."
"Yeah. It took me a long time to feel safe again. I'm sorry you had to see me go back to that place." She met Holly's sympathetic eyes, looking for the judgement, for her to see Gail as a victim.
"You don't have to apologize, Gail. You can't control things like that. I'm just glad I know what triggers you now. You never have to do that again. I want you to feel safe with me," The brunette placed a hand comfortingly on Gail's outer thigh. "I'll get rid of the handcuffs and blindfold. You're the only person I'm sleeping with, so there's no reason for me to keep them."
"I'm messed up, Holly."
"We're all a little messed up, Gail. Have you forgotten? I cut up dead people for a living." She smiled honestly at her girlfriend.
"Thank you for not treating me like I'm broken." Gail placed the glass on the nightstand and laid back with her head on Holly's lap.
"You're the strongest person I know." She stroked Gail's hair affectionately, glad that she was finally relaxing again.
"Hol?" The blonde took Holly's hand in her own and kissed it softly.
"Yeah?"
"I love you." Gail admitted, sleepy now more than anything, she figured that if she was being honest about everything else, she might as well say it aloud.
"I love you, too. You should get some sleep. I'll be here when you wake up." Holly promised.
The next morning when Gail woke up, she found a smiling Holly watching over her.