Auther's Notes: This story is a parody of bad fanfics and other things. Since so many fanfiction authers pointlessly bring in things from other films or anything else into there stories, I have decided to parody it. The parodies might be even stupider then most fanfics, though. Also the bad spelling and grammer in this story is also ment to parody bad fanfics. Even the the '( )' will be a parody.
Harry Potter was very happy, he was sixteen and that ment he could drive! (this story takes place instead of HBP, meaning Dombledore has NOT died) The Dursleys had let Harry get his lisense, so he could drive! It's my turn to drive! sang inside Harry's stupid head as he got ready to drive Uncle Vernin's car. "I'm warning you, boy!" said Uncle Vernin hand Harry the keys to his car. "One scratch, and youl never win again!" "Win, sir?" asked Harry to uncle Virnin's ugly face. "Lazy fanfiction writter didn't fix his typo!" explained Uncle Virnen hastely. "Live again" said Uncle Virnin. Harry still thought this threat didn't make much sense, but he didn't want Uncle vernin not to give him da car so he didn't push his temper cause that would be a bad idea caous Uncle vernin gets angrey really fast so he didn't push it because that wouldn't be cool and Harry was cool so he didn't push it because harry was smart and he wanted to drive the car and he thought he maybe in one of those long sentences that you may find in bad fanfictoin with bad gramr and silliiiiing. Uncle vernin gave Harry the keys and Harry jumped in the car like he was Neo from the Matrix (only not in slow-mow). He slamed the door and started the engine. He pulled all the switchs and started off. Harry stept on the accelerator, but he didn't pick up to well. When he got on the highway he was only going 25mph! "This car is junk!" Said Harry. "I need a new car!" So he drove back to vrinin and demaned a to buy a new car. "To it or I'll hex you! said Harry with a glair. "Fine! Fine!" said his ugly uncle with his ugly mustash that looked like ash. "Use my credit card!" "Cool!" said Harry. Before he drove to the car place he drove to the mall, because he had the Dursley's credit card so he could get what ever he wanted! He wnet to the clothing store and got a pair of jenes, a tee shirt witch showeda lot of Harry's chest, a gold chain around his neck, a sports cap that he wore backwerds couse he was awesome, basketball shoes, and a firebolt broom stick earing (he got his right ear persed earier that summer but had never gotten an earing to go withit) "I'm too sexy for my shirt!" sang harry, as hiphop music played in the backround. "TOo sexy for my shirt so sexy it herts!" Just then he saw someone else in the store as weel. A face, though he had never seen it before, he knew emetoitly. It was... MARY SUE! "Wow!" thought harry, he knew he loved he the instint he saw her, and she knew she loved him the instint she saw him!... ... But nether knew of each others feelings! (don't you just love tention?) "Nice pants." said Marry Sue, shyly. "Nice butt." said Harry. Wait, he hadn't ment to say that. "I, uh, mean, nice.." they imbraced and kissed and danced to "I've got the power!" together. Harry even did some mick jackson moves! When they left they had and arguement and left each other in tears. "Lazy auther!" muttered harry. Harry ate fries from mcdonalds and drove to the car place. He had completley forgotten about mary sue. "Uh, beeb beeb, beeb beeb, yea!" said harry to the way cool car dealer dude. "Sup?" said the way cool car dude in a way cool way. "I wanna fast car!" said harry. "Sure thing! Iv'e got just the thing!" said WCCD in a still cooler way. He flew harry over too some cars. "You can fly?" asked harry shocked. "Jetpacks the latest thing, Lightn' Man!" said WCCD eving cooler. Harry saw the car when he landed. It wasnt a coupe like harry wanted, it a way 4 door car. "The VW CTI" said WCCD (WCCD stands for Way cool car dude) coolly. "Itl' get you anyware in no time!" Harry thought the car didn't look very cool, but there was something he liked about the car, "looks cool" said harrie. "Biggest undestatement of the year!" said WCCD and he fliped out a digitle cell phone and marked a his calender on it really cooley! "Your really cool!" said harry impressed. "New biggest understate ment of the year!" said WCCD, marking his calender. He was so cool harry felt like dancing to "Lose yourself" but he knew dancing to music right now wouldn't be cool, and he wanted to seem as cool as ever in front of such coolness. "i'll take it!" said harry tosing him the credit card. "knw youd like it!" said WCCD catching the card without any trouble and without moving anything but his right hand slightly to catch it. He then threw harry the keys to the VW. Harry didn't catch them but he didn't care, all he wanted was to drive his knew car. He got his credit card back and flew on his firebolt into his car. He then made the fire bolt return to his house using magic. "Richess!" said WCCD giving a thumbs up. For since he was so cool, he knw all about magic and all that jazz. Harry turned one the ignition and drove offf. Harry went 40mph on the highway instintly. "You should be going faster!" said a voice. There, setting next to him was a little toy who had a sort of mean but very cool voice and look. Harry, when he looked into his eyes, was pessest. "Yes, master!" said Harry and went 60mph. Harry had made friends with his fast!