Okay so this is a tester chapter to see how people react to this, please review and tell me what you think :)

Chapter One

Thranduil placed the steaming mug of hot tea on the counter for Lucius, who was busily snipping away at Mrs Figg's split ends. Arabella Figg visited the salon only once a year, and just looking at her mistreated hair made Thranduil cringe. Lucius, however, managed to gin and bare it somehow, wasting no time in making Mrs Figg's hair silky and fabulous.

Lucius mouthed Thanks at Thranduil with a pointed look at Mrs Figg and an eye roll. Thranduil gave a small smile in reply just as the bell rang and his next appointment came stumbling in.

"Hello Mr Parker. Take a seat, now, what are we doing today?" Thranduil asked with a genuine smile, Peter Parker's hair was beautiful. Almost flawless. His Aunt sent him every 7 weeks or so and whatever he was using for his hair agreed with his roots perfectly.

"Oh um, the er usual, I guess." However the poor dear had no idea when it came time for him to have it cut. But this wasn't necessarily a bad thing, Thranduil got to do pretty much whatever he wanted with Peter's hair.

Thranduil started washing Peter's chocolate brown hair and glanced up in time to see Lucius shoot him a jealous glare. Thranduil smirked and picked up conversation with one of his favourite customers.

An hour later Peter was rushing out the door mumbling something about a family emergency. Lucius, having finished Mrs Figg's hair was sat holding his empty tea cup and watching the boy stumble out.

"Strange boy." He and Thranduil said it at the same time and grinned at each other.

"Mmm, up to something that's for sure. Something about him is definitely off, though not necessarily in a bad way. How was Mrs Figg?" Thranduil smirked. Lucius groaned.

"DON'T even go there. She goes on and on about her bloody cats every time and I DON'T CARE! And I don't know WHAT she does to her hair during the year, but washing it certainly isn't it. Ironing it maybe, washing? No." Lucius shuddered before continuing. "Her hair is so not fabulous."

"Yes well at least you don't have to put up with that grumpy Thorin Oakenshield fellow. URGH! I've got him in about half an hour and omg he just does not understand the meaning of our policy 'People who are fabulous inside and out only'! He thinks it's a joke and, I quote, "Not a very good one either"! Bloody CHEEK!"

Lucius shook his sadly and tried to change the subject.

"How's Legolas?"

"His hair is nearly as fabulous as mine," Thranduil positively beamed with pride, "Of course he's still mooning after Tauriel even though she's taken. I told him you can't stand around and wait for women to come to you. Not that I approved of Tauriel mind you, her hair is simply not..." For a moment Thranduil was lost searching for a word to describe what Tauriel's hair lacked. "Fabulous enough. Beneath him, I told him. But no, Legolas doesn't listen. So now she's engaged to that Kili fellow." They shook their heads sadly.

"Draco doesn't listen either. He had a wonderful girlfriend, Pansy. From a good family, not a single squib, no muggle blood, but no. Not good enough for him, so now he's got his eye on some muggle-born called Hermione Granger. In the mean time he's with some tramp called Lavender Brown. Her hair makes me shudder, and not the good kind of shudder."

"Why can't children just accept that their parents know better?" Thranduil asked in exasperation.

Lucius wandered over to check the books, and much to Thranduil's alarm started choking rather violently.

"Water!" Lucius managed to choke out. Thranduil rushed to get him a glass of water. After a few gulps Lucius gasped out.

"The books, look..."

"Oh my glorious god of fabulousness."