Happy Birthday, Wombat Boy…
Disclaimer: I do not own House, M.D., Fox does. If I owned it, they would immediately cancel the show because I would totally mess up the show with my ideas.
Ok, this is my first fanfic, so take it easy on me!! I came up with this idea when I was taking a shower, and I don't know if it's stupid or if it's decent. Anyway, tell me what you think!!
Chapter 1: The Wombat HatRobert Chase awoke to the sound of his shrill alarm clock. He reached to turn it off and in the process swept some things off his nightstand. He groaned as he heard a glass shatter. He could already tell this was going to be a not so great day.
He heaved himself out of bed, and being in the half asleep state he was in, he had already forgotten about the broken glass, and stepped right onto a particularly large piece. He yelled in pain as the glass embedded itself into the bottom of his foot. He swore and fell back into his bed.
He inspected his foot. It wasn't that bad, but wasn't that good, either. He cautiously hobbled to the bathroom, carefully removed the glass, cleaned the wound, and wrapped some gauze around it. It wasn't that deep, so he figured that it would be okay.
He realized that taking a shower while standing on his left foot with gauze on his right wasn't really a good idea. So he sighed and headed to his closet. As he was sifting through his shirts trying to find something decent to wear, a thought hit him.
It's my birthday today, he realized. Not surprisingly, it didn't really seem like a big deal. He had learned back in his childhood that while other children's birthdays were special days for them, his weren't. Because of his family, his birthdays were never special, never meant anything to him, just that he was another year older.
He finally finished getting dressed, then limped to the kitchen to grab himself a quick breakfast of a bagel and some coffee. He glanced at the clock. He would be a bit early, but he loved being early-it was so peaceful without House there. House was never there when Chase came in. Chase could count on one hand (without even using all five fingers, mind you) the times that House had come in on time. And that was pretty amazing, considering Chase had been working there for a couple years now.
He headed out of his small apartment complex and made his way to his car. As he tried to open the car door, he sloshed his coffee all over his hands. He swore for the twentieth time that morning, then got into his car. He put the key in the ignition, turned it, and… nothing. He banged his head against the steering wheel in frustration. His foot was throbbing, his left hand was throbbing, half of his coffee was gone, and now his car wouldn't start and he would be late for work.
He got out of his car and tried to figure out what was wrong with it. He eventually fixed it…twenty minutes later. He looked at his watch and groaned. He had to get to the hospital in five minutes…it wasn't happening.
Twenty minutes later, he limped into the glass walled Diagnostics lounge. Cameron and Foreman were there.
"Happy birthday, Chase," Cameron said, smiling. Foreman greeted him also.
"How did you know it was my birthday?" Chase asked, astonished. He had never told anyone it was his birthday…or at least he thought so.
"Here you go," she said, grinning even wider. She handed him a medium sized box with a girly, curlicue ribbon on top. He raised his eyebrows, but just silently took the box and opened it. Inside were a couple ties.
"I figured you could use some good looking ties for once," she said. He rolled his eyes, but thanked her. It was the first time he had gotten a gift in a long time…a long time.
Just then, the door of the lounge flew open, and House limped in.
"Hey, gimpy," he said, looking at the way Chase favored his left foot when he got up to get coffee. "What did you do? Want to become like me? It's okay, you can admit it. Everyone wants to be like me. I'm an excellent role model. And why aren't you wearing your birthday suit? Come on, you know Cameron would like it."
Chase rolled his eyes. "I stepped on some glass this morning," he muttered. "And how did you know it's my birthday?"
"Because I'm God, and I know everything," House replied, tossing a pink box with a purple ribbon his way. Chase caught it and eyed it nervously. He didn't know what to expect. What would House buy Chase that wouldn't spray acid, explode in his face or blow up the entire hospital?
"Open it. You'll love it," House said, gesturing at the hideous box.
"What's with the pink and purple?"
"I thought it was pretty. Open the stupid box."
Holding his breath, Chase lifted the top off the box. He saw tons of pink (with purple flowers) tissue paper inside. He ripped away all the tissue paper.
"What the-what in the world is this?" Chase asked, curious and repulsed at the same time. Inside the box was a fuzzy, animal shaped hat.
"It's a wombat hat, of course. Put it on!" House said gleefully, grabbing the hat from the box and jamming it on Chase's head. Cameron and Foreman stared at the hideous, fuzzy thing sitting on top of Chase's head. No doubt about it-it was a wombat.
"Look!" House cried, obviously having way too much fun with this. He squeezed one of it's ears, and it responded with a "Crikey, mate!"
"Oh, my lord," muttered Chase, his face turning a dark red. Cameron started to giggle, and Foreman was trying to hold back his laughter, but was starting to fail.
"But wait! There's more!" House said, squeezing it's other ear. Immediately, the Australian anthem filled the room. Chase slid farther down into his seat, and Cameron and Foreman exploded with laughter. As soon as the song was over, Chase ripped the hat off of his head and stuffed it back into the box.
"That's the stupidest gift I've ever gotten..." he muttered.
"Okay, people. Let's get to work. We've got a fifteen year old female…"
Chase tuned out House's voice. He looked at House's gift. He supposed that this...this thing was better than no gift at all. It was definitely better than the "gift" he had woken up to on his thirteenth birthday. A gift that involved his mother, some alcohol, and a temper tantrum. A tantrum that ended up being quite painful for him.
Hi, sorry if that wasn't a great ending, I'm having a total brainfart here. Anyways, please review, I don't mind contructive criticism, as long as it isn't flamey! I need to know what I need to work on!