I don't have much to say about it other than the fact that this is going to be awesome~!

Disclaimer: South Park Belongs to Trey Parker and Matt Stone

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Chapter 1

- One Crappy Town to Another Where Humanity Sucks Just as Bad

"Sister~! Help me~!" A four year old African-American boy exclaimed, attempting to buckle up his seatbelt whilst he sat in the back of a rusted Toyota.

He had short, messy dark hair that was much darker than his chocolate skin. Around his neck was a golden dogtag with the name 'Ivan' engraved upon it.

The eleven year old girl beside him, a Caucasian, sighed and undid her own seatbelt before reaching over and snapping the belt of Ivan tightly shut. As she did this, her own black hair fell loose from her ponytail and hung messily in her pale face.

"There you go, Ivan."

"Lili! Get back in your seatbelt!" A Hispanic woman, heavy Spanish accent included, shouted from the passenger seat.

"I was just-!"

"Listen to your mother!" The Hispanic male driver, also with a heavy Spanish accent, interrupted sternly, glaring into the back seat through the rear-view mirror.

Lili huffed, knowing she wouldn't get in a single word, and re-buckled herself in. Ivan looked towards her apologetically and she smiled softly at him to let him know it was okay.

For a four year old, he was certainly better than most. He didn't like getting his beloved sister into trouble.

As you might have guessed, both Lili and her "brother" were adopted by the two Hispanics in the front seats of the old, rusty vehicle. Ivan, when he was just a newborn baby of three days. Lili, when she was three and a half. It was why she had always felt she didn't really fit-in with this "family" .

She was sure Ivan would eventually feel the same, but at the moment he was just too young to understand the difference in skin-color. For that, she was glad. Ivan didn't need to understand that yet. He was African-American after all. They always seemed to get the brute of the racist comments.

Speaking of which-

"Hey, where exactly are we going anyways?"

"South Park, Colorado, Lili." The said nine year old frowned at this.

"So, crappy New Mexico to some crappy town in Colorado?"

"Do not insult your old and new home!"

"Why not? At the moment, we don't exactly live anywhere except in this crappy, old car." To emphasize that point, Lili kicked the back of the seat in front of her.

It was her "mother", Rosetta's. The said victim of this act shot the girl an annoyed glare.

"Lili!" The eleven year old reached up and fixed her ponytail, shaking her head in annoyance afterwards.

"Ironic though. I didn't fit in back "home", but Ivan won't fit in when we get wherever the hell we're going." Lili glanced out the window.

"You guys never pick places we can both fit in." Her comments went ignored, as Rosetta had turned the music up louder.

Clavo, Lili and Ivan's "father", then began tapping his fingers to the beat of whatever was playing (though to Lili it sounded a lot like some sort of Spanish alternative) which only further annoyed her.

"We don't even fit in here. Stupid adoption process." Lili Rodriguez had never felt welcome in her so-called "family".

She had never felt wanted. She figured that the only reason she was a member of the family in the first place because there were no Hispanics in the orphanage which she was adopted from. She supposed Ivan would soon feel the same, once he realized how different the Rodriguez's were from one another.

Really, two Hispanic adults, a white girl, and a black boy- it wasn't really an average family. Judgement was everywhere they went. Everywhere. In New Mexico, it was because of the color of the skin of both herself and her brother. In this new town they were supposedly going to, it would be everyone in her family. Her "parents" and her brother.

Yes, the only person out of the entire group she considered family was Ivan. He loved her unconditionally and she felt the same for him. As strange as it seemed, it was the truth. He accepted her. Then again, she was the one who generally raised him.

Clavo was a mortician. He cut dead people open in order to figure out how they died. Rosetta was a doctor. Or, more specifically, a psychiatrist.

The main reason for this stupid move, actually, was because of their jobs. Apparently, this crappy town in Colorado needed a doctor who cut up dead people and a doctor who delved into the crazed minds of humanity.

Really, they were stupid jobs. Who wanted to cut up dead people? Who wanted to attempt to read human minds?

It was just plain creepy in her opinion.

Well, at least Lili would get a chance to not fit in somewhere else because if anyone said something about Ivan, she would personally kick their ass.

"One crappy town to another." She grumbled, shaking her head.

It was bad enough that her "family" was blended and weird, but Lili wasn't exactly the stereotypical girl herself. It probably was part of the reason she was judged.

For an eleven year old, she was boyish with a dark green-grey hoodie and baggy blue jeans. She liked her hair long, which was probably the only girly part of her appearance, but kept it tied back in a messy ponytail. On her hands, she wore thin, black and fingerless gloves. Around her neck, there tended to be a red-plaid kerchief also accompanied with a digital camera.

Lili liked taking photographs of the scenery around her. When she was in a good mood, that is. In any normal situation, she'd probably be snapping pictures like crazy from inside the rusty Toyota. Yet, this was not a normal situation.

Lili Rodriguez was moving to Colorado. South Park, Colorado.

Well, on the bright side, she didn't have any friends to leave behind and it was almost Christmas break too. More time for her to get used to her surroundings after the first few days at her new school, she supposed. Then again, she'd probably be in that town for years, since her "parents" probably wouldn't move again. That gave her plenty of time to get used to it.

Plenty of time to get used to everything.

"Crap. We're screwed, Ivan." Lili stated, turning to her brother.

Ivan peered up at her, confused.

"Screwed?" She smiled and shook her head at his innocence.

"Nevermind."

--

Lili stared blankly at the small house in front of her. Her feet were ankle deep in snow, but she ignored it. They weren't cold anyway.

She allowed her eyes to scan the rest of the houses beside the one in front of her, her expression remaining as stoic as ever.

They all looked the same.

"Lili! Get your ass inside! Ivan won't come in unless you do and you need to start unpacking!" Clavo shouted from the doorway.

Lili's stoic expression quickly turned into a scowl before she glanced down at her brother. Ivan stood beside her, staring up at his precious big sister. A large red and white lollipop in his little hand that he was licking every few minutes.

"C'mon, Ivan. Dad's being more of a bitch than usual." Both herself and Ivan limbered inside where Rosetta pointed to the stairs.

Lili sighed and made her way up the stairs, her brother trailing close behind. The girl and the four year old entered the upstairs hallway, scanning the walls which were already decorated with photos of "family".

Also along the walls were several unpacked boxes, each labelled with either Lili's name or Ivan's in messy red marker. It was the eleven year old's messy scrawl.

"Bah. Bitches. Move us here against our will, then expect us to do all this stupid shit. Didn't even tell us which room is ours. There's like, three of them up here. Ah, whatever. I'll pick a stupid room for myself and if they don't like it, they can shove it up their asses. You do the same, Ivan."

"No~! I wanna stay in a room with you~!" Her face was expressionless as she stared blankly at her brother.

--

Simply put, unpacking those damn boxes was pretty easy. Probably because Lili didn't have very many in the first place. I mean, really, how much stuff does an eleven year old need anyway?

All together, Lili had maybe three boxes full of stuff. Hell, Ivan had more than that. Then again, four year olds did rather enjoy their toys and Lili preferred to play with her camera.

Speaking of which-

"Hey, can I go scout the area? You know, for geological purposes?" The girl asked as she made her way to the living room with Ivan following close behind.

Rosetta and Clavo Rodriguez were too engrossed in the wonders of television. Obviously, they hadn't had that much stuff either. They had finished unpacking a long time ago.

Clavo waved his hand and mumbled some things in Spanish, obviously finding the television more important.

"Go ahead. Take Ivan with you." Rosetta stated, still distracted with the television.

Lili rolled her eyes.

"Whatever. C'mon, Ivan, we don't need to take this crap. Let's go exploring and get this shit over with." And she slipped out the door of her house.

Yes. It was just a house. Not exactly a home, yet. Then again, she doubted this place would ever be home to her. She didn't even feel at home in New Mexico and she had actually lived there for her entire life.

Her feet stopped moving as soon as she stepped outside and Ivan stopped beside her. Lili then reached for her camera and snapped a quick picture of the house. This way she'd at least have some way of locating the craphole whenever she decided to come back. It's not like her "parents" would go looking for her anyway.

They got distracted by the most ridiculous things. Today, it was television. Tomorrow morning and afternoon, work, shiny things, and colourful fish.

For once in her life, Lili was glad both herself and her brother were adopted. At least they weren't genetically related to idiots. She truly wondered how they got through university like that.

"C'mon, Ivan. Maybe if we go far enough, we'll ditch this hellhole. Or at least find a good spot to take pictures." Ivan nodded his head, which was covered by a dark blue and yellow hat.

Lili just allowed her fingerless gloved hands to fall to her sides as she limbered aimlessly through the streets with her little brother close behind.

Her eyes scanned her surroundings and Ivan's head turned with utmost curiosity.

The town was indeed small and, though she'd never actually admit it because Lili was a stubborn idiot at times, she found the white snow which decorated the tiny down rather pretty.

But, as was mentioned, the girl would not admit that. For one, it would make her contradict herself. For two, well, it would ruin her tomboy image. Her image was truly all she had. The tougher she looked, the better. She doubted that there were a lot of girls who'd go near a tomboy at this age and boys? They just stayed away from girls in general.

Though Lili hated to be judged, she was not going to change herself to make friends. If no one liked her because of her personality, her unusual boyish attire, or female mind- well, that was their loss.

Screw them, if that was the case. Who the hell needed friends who'd judge anyways? Besides, it wasn't as if Lili expected to make friends in this stupid town. She didn't have friends in New Mexico either.

Then again, Lili wasn't a people person.

People person: someone who gets along with humanity.

Humanity: It sucks horribly.

Oh, what a wonderful outlook on life. Not. Lili needed a better hobby. Photography and complaining internally definitely wasn't doing it for her.

Ivan suddenly called out to her as the two reached the edge of town. They stood by a large wooden sign that simply stated the town's name.

South Park.

Lili turned her attention to Ivan, who was jumping up and down like an idiot. Well, he was four.

"Eh, what is it, Ivan?"

"Look~!" He pointed and Lili followed his finger, seeing a figure run across the street on fire with two boys following close behind him.

On the sidewalk, a fourth boy laughed like an idiot. She couldn't help, but notice he was a large boy- not height wise either.

Lili simply blinked before she calmly raised her camera and snapped a quick picture of the one on fire just before he collapsed into the snow. The other two boys, who seemed to actually care about the now motionless body, proceeded to kick cold snow over the body.

Ivan hid behind Lili, who merely acted indifferent to the fact that the body on the ground was indeed dead.

Well, this was different. It's not every day that you see a boy running through the streets on fire. It just didn't happen. Often.

"You killed Kenny!"

"You bastard!" The boys shouted pointedly to the fat one on the sidewalk, who merely wiped a tear from his eye and grinned like an idiot.

"I just knew you could light farts on fire!" Lili's lips twitched into an extremely rare smile.

Well, as evil as the act was- it was also pretty cool.

"Dude, that was totally uncalled for!"

"Stan's right, Cartman. I mean, couldn't you have actually hit the target instead?"

"Gah! Kenny's dead, Kyle! Who cares about those stupid ass targets?!"

"Dude, calm down. We'll just deal with this in a calm and mature manner." Meanwhile, the fat one, Cartman, he was called retorted in a whiny voice.

"There's no way in hell that I'm cleaning this up!" Kyle then proceeded to glare at Cartman.

"Dude! This is your fault!"

"Yeah, Cartman! This is your mess!" Stan added.

Cartman stared, then turned.

"Screw you guys, I'm goin' home!" And- he left down the sidewalk.

Lili turned her attention back to Kyle and Stan, who rolled their eyes promptly and turned their own attention back to the body of the boy that was once proclaimed Kenny.

A gentle tug called to her, ripping her attention from the scene. Ivan stared up, confused expression on his young and innocent face.

"Big Sister? We go home now?"

"Home, Ivan? We have no home. It's just a house. But, yeah. We'll leave." And she also left, ignoring the fact that she'd probably just witnessed a murder.

It wasn't her problem. She hadn't been the one who killed the kid. She'd just watched him run around screaming through the streets- on fire. Well, maybe she should've done something, but that would have caused her to make an impression on somebody.

As was stated earlier, the definition of humanity is simple. It just plain sucks.

"I've said it once and I'll say it again, Ivan. We went from one crappy town- to another. Remember that." Ivan somehow pulled a notepad and pen from his light brown winter coat and jotted this information down.

For a four year old, it was certainly something for being able to write at all before even going to school. He was to start the next day with his beloved big sister at the elementary school. Kindergarten.

"Oh, and one more thing, before you put that away."

"Yes?"

"Humanity, It sucks. End of story."

"Got it~! Can I have candy when we get home?"