A/N: Hey, guys! Some of your were mad about my other oneshot, in which I did Perachel. So here's some Percabeth goodness. :) Warning. Extreme sap/fluff. Like, a bunny covered in treesap. No liking, no reading. Enjoy!
Microwaves Explode
~ p e r c y
Beep. Beep. Beep. Grover, pick up the stinking phone! Annabeth, ever the little inventor, had created demigod-friendly phones that didn't send up signals to monsters. And Grover never picked up!
'Hello?' my best friend's sleepy voice came across the line.
'Grover! Buddy! Pal!' I resumed my pacing through the kitchen of my flat.
'What do you want?' he bleated. 'It's two a.m., for gods' sakes.'
'Dude! I don't know how to propose to Annabeth!' I said frantically, running my fingers through my hair. It was a nervous habit I'd picked up lately.
Silence.
'Percy, you're kidding.' Uh-oh, Grover was mad. He was usually pretty chill, in a hippie kind of way, but when he got mad, you better run for it.
'I mean, how did you ask Juniper?' I begged.
'Uh, I went up and said, "Juniper, marry me", and gave her a ring. It's a piece of cake.'
'Wait a second. A ring? OH MY GODS. I FORGOT THE RING. CRAP.'
'Percy, calm down. It's not like you have to do it tomorrow.'
'YES IT IS!'
'For the love of Pan, Percy, stop yelling!'
'Gah! I'm sorry man, I'm just so nervous about this. What if she says no?'
'Percy, it's been eleven years. You'd think she'd wanna get married by now.'
'She does,' another voice piped up. 'We've had enough slumber parties to confirm that notion.'
'Hi, Juniper.'
'You woke me up, you damn moron,' she grumped, then added, 'just relax, Percy. Trust me, she won't say no. Now go to sleep, you fool.'
'Yes, Mom,' I muttered, hanging up and putting the phone down. Juniper had reassured me a little, but there was still the concept of proposing that freaked me out. Should I bring flowers, or is that too cheesy? Should I go with being cliché or do something original? And why the Hades couldn't girls ask guys?
I tried to recall everything Grover had said … aha. He'd said: it's a piece of cake.
Hmm, cake. I like where this is going.
~ j u n i p e r
I flung open the door to find an extremely annoyed-looking Annabeth. Her hair was tucked up in a baseball cap and she was wearing a plain gray sweater with black sweatpants.
I tutted. 'Annabeth, do you want me to cry?' I said in a sad voice.
'No, there'd be chlorophyll all over the place,' she joked as I dragged her into my home with one arm. 'Why am I here again? Just a point of interest I thought I'd mention.'
'You're here for this,' I said dramatically, flinging open a door to reveal our bathroom, which I had completely renovated. The shelves, counter, sink and even bathtub were overflowing with beauty products. Annabeth paled visibly and collapsed into the red velvet chair I had put in the middle of the room precisely for that reason.
'Have you gone mad?' she squeaked.
'You're seeing Percy tonight, aren't you?' I asked matter-of-factly, plugging the blow-dryer into the wall and turning it on.
'YEAH,' she shouted to be heard over the roar.
'WELL, YOU HAVE TO LOOK YOUR BEST. TONIGHT WILL BE SPECIAL,' I promised as I began to blow-dry her hair, wet from a morning shower.
'WHY?'
'CUZ I SAID SO, AND I'M NEVER WRONG. NOW SHUT UP, MY THROAT IS GETTING SORE.'
'OKAY. JUST ONE MORE THING …'
'YEAH?'
'THIS TIME WHEN YOU COME TO CURL MY HAIR, DON'T PUT MY EAR INTO THE HAIR STRAIGHTENER!'
'IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!' I protested, wincing at the memory of the last time I tried to give Annabeth a makeover. Hopefully this time she'd look a little better.
In about three hours, Annabeth was staring disbelievingly at her reflection in the mirror. I had done her hair in waves and swept it in a bun, letting one loose curl (the gray one) frame her face. She was wearing charcoal-black waterproof mascara (I had a feeling she'd be crying of joy) to make her pretty gray eyes pop, and ruby red lip gloss. Obviously she had protested against the idea of wearing a dress/skirt of any sort whatsoever, so I had to stick with a funky navy-and-blue-striped strapless top, paired with stonewashed jeggings and navy-blue ballet pumps. Percy would barely be able to get the words out.
My vision was blurred green as tears welled up in my eyes. 'I'm so proud!' I sniffled.
'Aw, don't cry,' Annabeth hugged me. 'I really do appreciate it. Although I don't know why you get the feeling tonight's going to be so special. I'm just going round for dinner.'
I laughed. Loudly.
'Juniper, is there something you know that I don't?' she asked suspiciously.
'Um. Of course not, dear!' I pushed her through the door hurriedly. 'Go wow 'em!'
'You do know the date's in two hours, right?'
'Oh.' I started to drag her to the TV room. 'In that case … chick flick time!'
She groaned in protest.
'Don't worry,' I said kindly, laying a comforting hand on her arm. 'We'll only watch Made of Honor twice.'
~ k a t i e g a r d n e r
Guess what? Percy Jackson shops at Tiffany's. I couldn't wait to tell Travis. He'd be taunting for weeks ("Got your anklets fitted, Percy?" "That bracelet would, like, totally go with your eyes").
But when I figured his actual motivation for coming, I decided to keep it to myself. It was just so sweet! Travis didn't shop here for my wedding ring. He gave me his mom's.
'Hi, Katie,' Percy said nervously, walking through the glass doors of the Tiffany's I worked at. He looked like he'd rather be doing laps in the Styx than be here.
'Hi.' I was wondering what the Hades he was doing here. 'So, what brings you here?'
He blushed bright red. 'Um, do you know where I can get … a wedding ring?' he said meekly.
Biting back the coos, I gave a professional smile. 'Sure thing,' I said, walking out from behind the desk and leading him to the ring aisle. 'I'm pretty sure I can give you a discount if you keep it on the DL.'
'Thanks, Katie,' he said, sounding relieved.
That look vanished however as I talked him through our rings – gold, silver, bronze, platinum, diamonds, rubies, emeralds, sapphires – we had it all.
'Oh gods,' he mumbled, burying his face in his hands when I was done talking. 'I'm never gonna be able to do this!'
'Trust me, it's not that hard,' I said nicely. The truth was, most of the other men had fled and never looked back after the tour.
'Just look through them. When you find the right ring, well … you'll know. Good luck.' I waggled my fingers at him and walked back to the desk, going back to price-stamping new shipments.
I tell you, all that drama was for nothing. in about a half hour, he came up, his eyes shining with excitement, and put a ring in front of me. 'This one,' he said. 'That's the one.'
I looked at the ring more closely. It was a simple platinum band with a tiny, gorgeously-carved silver owl on the front. Its eyes were made of miniscule glimmering topaz beads.
'It's beautiful!' I exclaimed. 'I wish Travis had the same style as you. But no.'
Strangely enough, when I took the ring into further consideration, it had no price tag on it. 'I don't think we even stocked these,' I said slowly. 'Percy, where'd you find this?'
'Well, I was looking at the rings and it just … fell onto my head,' he explained. 'I was thinking maybe it fell off one of the higher shelves.'
'Huh. That's funny.' I gave it another once-over. 'Well, since you're a special customer – a.k.a., you saved our butts from Kronos – you can have this for … four hundred?'
'Phew.' He pulled out four hundred-dollar bills and handed them to me. 'Thanks, Katie,' he said happily.
'You don't want that gift-wrapped?' I asked.
'I have my own wrapping in mind,' he said slyly. 'Thanks anyways.'
'Bye! Good luck!' I called, waving as he walked through the door. As soon as he was gone, I bolted out of the shop and looked around.
Surely enough, there they were. A woman dressed in jeans and a white blouse was standing outside the shop, smiling after the direction Percy had gone. She had elegant features, dark brown hair in a braid, and … storm gray eyes. Beside her was a man in Bermuda shorts and a blue t-shirt, with green eyes and black hair.
I smiled and ducked back into the shop. Who would've guessed they'd actually get along, for once?
~ a n n a b e t h
I hopped out of Juniper's car, suddenly nervous. Juniper had been prep-talking me all evening – how I should sit, how I should walk, how I should talk – she even made me walk around with a book on my head. And the thing is, I didn't even know the Hades why.
'You'll do great,' Juniper assured me before driving off in her eco-friendly car (green, of course).
In the elevator, I looked in the floor-to-ceiling mirror, hopping with jitters. The ADHD was acting up – should I tuck my gray curl behind my ear? Should I hitch my jeans up a little? Should I take off my charm bracelet, or should I keep it?
Before I could make any of those wild decisions, the elevator dinged for the 3rd floor. This was it.
I walked to Percy's door, and with a deep breath, knocked – five, seven, five. It was a special knock, mocking Apollo's dreadful haikus.
Percy flung open the door almost instantly with a breathless smile. His hair was completely untamable, as per usual, and he was wearing his trademark ripped jeans and a pale green t-shirt. I immediately felt too dressy. Darn you, Juniper, I cursed silently.
'Hi,' Percy said. 'Come on in.' I stepped into his homey apartment, and he instantly put his hands over my eyes.
'Not another surprise,' I begged. The last time he ever had a surprise for me was my birthday party, which turned out to be a total flop since Mrs. O'Leary ate the birthday cake and ripped down the decorations to play with.
'You'll like this one,' he promised. 'Now walk.'
'If I bump into a pole and die, I'm gonna slap you,' I warned.
He just laughed. After a couple minutes walking, I heard a door opening and Percy removed his hands with a flourish. 'Ta-da!' he announced dramatically.
I looked at him, eyebrows raised. 'Percy, this is your kitchen,' I deadpanned.
'Ah, but lookie here,' he said, putting his hands on my shoulders and spinning me around. His counter was laden with kitchen supplies.
I perked up immediately. He knew I loved to cook, especially in his state-of-the-art kitchen. 'Yay!' I squealed, running over and inspecting the ingredients – flour, sugar, eggs, etc. 'We're making pancakes, right?' I asked.
'Correct,' he said, 'but on one condition.'
'Mm-hmm.' I wasn't even really listening as I measured out two cups of flour into the blender.
'I'm helping!'
'Nuh-uh!' I instantly dropped the task at hand and looked him straight in the eye with the Athena-death-glare. 'Percy Jackson, you are not, under any circumstances, "helping". Remember when we tried to bake Nico's thirteenth birthday cake?'
'Um … no?'
'Yes, yes you do. You made it pink. YOU MADE IT PINK.'
'Okay, that was an honest mi –'
'Oh, I'm not done!' I was on a roll here. I started to count things off on my fingers. 'When we tried to make bread, you put in like five packets of yeast and I was scraping dough off the inside of my oven for weeks. When we tried to make cookies, you used hard-boiled eggs. Hades, when we invited our parents for coffee, you put in two spoons of salt into each cup!'
He pouted. 'And I thought Nico's fatal flaw was holding grudges.'
'I'm about to strangle you!' I turned around and cracked two eggs expertly, dropping the yolks into the blender. I'm usually pretty stubborn – don't get me wrong – but my resolve wavered just a tiny little bit when Percy wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my cheek. 'Pleeeease?'
I sighed. 'I'm gonna regret this, aren't I?'
'Of course.'
'In that case … grab an apron.'
Surprisingly enough, Percy didn't make a huge mess out of everything in sight. Well … maybe he did kinda break three eggs on the floor, but as long as I didn't have to clean it up, I was happy.
I flipped the last pancake from the pan onto the plate and took off my apron. 'Thanks for not breaking anything,' I said.
He rolled his eyes. 'Thanks for dinner,' he replied, getting two plates from a cupboard. 'You go ahead and get the television – Ares and Aphrodite are being busted again on Hephaestus TV, and I wanna get it on tape.'
'So you can torture Clarisse with it?' I laughed, going into his comfy TV room.
'Well … duh!' he yelled back.
I retrieved the little golden remote from under the sofa, which had only one button. I clicked it, and the TV switched on with a magical glow. The buttons multiplied into those of a normal remote.
I flicked through Aeolus announcing the weather, Demeter's cooking with vegetables show and Aphrodite's soap operas before settling on Hephaestus TV. The cameras were focused on the Thrill Ride O'Love … again.
Percy walked in with a huge grin on his face. I wondered exactly what about making pancakes could make him so happy.
'Hey, look where they are again!' I said, gesturing towards the TV.
'Uncreative much?' he said with disdain, plopping down next to me. The camera zeroed in on Aphrodite's scarf.
'Ah, gonna get it themselves this time, and not make a couple demigods do it?' he muttered.
'And you say I hold a grudge?' I snorted.
'Yup!'
'No!'
'Yeah!'
'Nuh-uh!'
'Yuh-huh!'
It was just about to turn into a full-fledged tickle fight when I heard a faint beeping noise. 'Hey, what's that?' I asked, mentally panicking.
'Oh, the microwave,' Percy said, rubbing his hands together gleefully.
'What? Oh, for the love of Zeus, don't just sit there!' I jumped up and sprinted for the kitchen, Percy on my tail. The microwave was billowing black smoke.
I ripped the door open, and it literally exploded, sending splatters of gooey pancake all over me.
I spun around and stuck a finger accusingly into Percy's chest. 'Perseus. Jackson,' I said through clenched teeth.
He raised his hands, smiling. 'Okay, I can explain.'
'Grr! You ruin everything! Things get ruined with you just being in the same room! I don't even know how the Hades it's possible for you to make stuff go kapoof by just touching them! It's like the freakin' Midas touch!'
'Annabeth –'
'And there I was, skipping around the kitchen, tra-la-la-la-la, thinking we'd actually make it through cooking something without it exploding, getting burnt, or being raw and inedible! Gods, Percy, this is the bread incident all over again!'
'Annabeth, just –'
'Can I help? Pleeeease?' I said, in a very bad imitation of his voice, then in my own, 'oh of course you can, Percy. I know you're just gonna break another thing, or cause a huge problem, but okay! You can help anyway! What have I got to lose? I have nothing to lose, sure, but you, Percy Jackson – I know where your Achilles spot is!'
'Annabeth.'
'WHAT?'
'Don't you even wanna know why it exploded?'
'CUZ YOU'RE A MORON.'
He stifled laughter. 'No.' He took the still-steaming plate out of the oven and prodded at it with a fork. 'There was metal in it,' he explained.
'You put metal in it. On purpose.'
'Uh-huh.'
I buried my face in my hands. 'Mother of Zeus,' I mumbled, my voice muffled.
'Ah! Here it is,' Percy said, darting over to the sink to wash something. After he'd wiped it off, he came back. 'This is what caused the explosion,' Percy said, opening up his hand. In his palm lay a beautiful ring with a silver owl on the front, its yellow-brown eyes gleaming gorgeously.
My anger dissolved as I put a hand to my mouth. 'It's stunning, Percy,' I squeaked, taking it from him and turning it over in my hands.
'Annabeth.' I looked up at him. His eyes were sparkling, but his expression was serious. 'Will you marry me?' he asked firmly.
I blinked a couple times, like I was paralyzed. Then I exploded enough to put Percy's microwave to shame.
'Yes!' I squealed, leaping at him. He caught me (thankfully), and I hugged him tight enough that if he was a normal person he'd probably die. 'Yes, yes, yes! A billion times yes!'
I was giddy with excitement and happiness. And when he cupped my face to kiss me, I felt a sense of completion.
~ a t h e n a
Aphrodite gave an extremely loud scream as Percy Jackson proposed to my daughter. Hephaestus's camera zoomed in on the ring, and I couldn't help but smile proudly.
Poseidon smiled and said to me, 'Perhaps we can get along for our children's sake?' he said.
'Okay, Uncle. But no more people in my temple,' I cautioned. He ducked his head in embarrassment.
Meanwhile, Ares was trying to comfort Aphrodite, but she was in hysterics. 'Just – so – adorable!' she sobbed. 'Must make a – hic – soap opera about it.'
I suddenly remembered another little thing including Aphrodite and our children. 'Um, so I'll be going!' I said quickly, edging towards the doors.
Aphrodite flicked her wrists, and they slammed shut.
'Here goes – I TOLD YOU SO!' she crowed, apparently having recovered from her fit. 'Pay up, nonbelievers!'
I sighed and rooted around inside my bag for the drachmas I owed her. Remind me never to bet against Aphrodite again.
Whew, that's done. Now, here's a test to see how smart you are: if you're the smartest person on earth, and want a cookie, you'll click that little Review button and make my day. C'mon, it's begging! It's challenging you! Dooo iiiiittt!
