A/N: This is a story about Courtney kinda growing up and dealing with certain things that children shouldn't need to at a young age. She's been exposed to a lot of shit and basically the shit she goes through, she over comes by being smart and proactive. But will she always know what to do when things are bad? Will she ever give up? Will she ever stand up to her mom.. Her dad? Or maybe her own sister? Courtney's getting older and as she ages her body changes as well as feelings, especially towards guys but she doesn't want to turn out like sister. She's going into a new school with a different kind of attitude. Please Read and Review by givin me ideas or constructive criticism.

Thx - Neen

Part 1: "Quarter" Home Secret

I knew my life would be different moving up a grade level and I knew my family would start to treat me different, but I never knew I would be changing too. Coming right out of elementary school into middle school was just a whole new story.

I always dreamed of going to the perfect private school with perfect boys and girls where there would be no drama or teasing. Everyone would move out of the way for miss Courtney and treat me like the beautiful princess I am.. A treatment I've never received from anyone, not even my own family. But now…

"COURTNEY!" I'm awaken from my day dreaming and brought back to the real world of my mother screaming, my older sister nagging and, my always gone father.

"Coming!" I hollered back. I roll off my thick bed and land onto the floor. My room is light pink and purple with flower borders and butterflies. I have a dresser with a huge mirror that is the color of peach and in good shape.. Well it hides the 'evidence' anyways. My room is probably the cleanest and organized in the house. I open my pink door and run down the stairs to the kitchen where my mother is braiding my sisters hair. The kitchen is actually clean for once, well after I cleaned it an hour ago, but I'm still surprised my mother hasn't broken or dirtied up anything.

"Yes mom?" I answer in a friendly voice.

"You know, school starts tomorrow." She looks up at me with her gorgeous light brown eyes and wavy thick brown hair that hasn't been brushed in over two days. Her cigarette fills the room with thick smoke and I cough.

"Yes…" I reply standing still and trying not to cough.

"Well, what are you going wear?" She asks taking a puff of her cigarette and takes a break from braiding. I look at my mother confused.

"What do you mean?" I ask walking closer to my mother.

"I swear little sisters can be so stupid!" Charity, my 16 year old sister, says under her breath. I stick my tongue out and pout.

"Stop it Charity before I give you something else that'll really hurt." My mom and sister share a staring silent moment, both with exaggerated looks. Mom's expression: "Don't make me get my belt and beat the shit out of you". Charity's Expression: "Bitch I wish you would." I stand their watching and finally my sister gets up cursing and walks out the door.

"SEE IF YOU GET BACK IN!" My mother jumps up after and locks the door. "I swear your sister is gonna get fucked up one day, you watch and see."

My family is very.. Odd from others. You'd expect it to be perfect, beautiful mansion house with a mom that works, cooks and cleans. A nice older sister who hasn't had 3 abortions and respects my mom. And a dad. A dad who…

"COURTNEY!" My mom smacks my rosy red cheek. I jump startled.

"Yes." I rub my cheek almost about to cry, however, I'm so used to it that it doesn't even throb anymore.

"What the fuck are you going to wear tomorrow! You're starting a new fuckin school with more bitches who ain't gon do shit but make fun of ya ass and yo brain." My mother walks back over to the counter and smokes her cigs. I look at her mad. I didn't even stop to notice her ugly attire she's wearing today. Booty shorts with a tube top with her saggy boobies just hanging down. Lookin like the sideline hoe she is.

"Well I guess that since daddy isn't here to dress me, then I'll choose something that's appropriate for the occasion." I smile and my mother instantly runs back over to me and doesn't hesitate to smack the shit out of me again. I fall back on my butt and look up at her about to start crying for real. I rub my cheek and that only makes her more mad. She grabs my arms and shakes me back and fourth with her cigarette only inches from my face.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID I TELL YOU ABOUT USING THAT GOD DAMN LANGUAGE IN MY FUCKING HOUSEHOLD!" She pulls me off the floor and spanks me with her bare hands, pulling up my poofy dress to expose the other bruises she's left there. I scream and cry trying to get out of her grip but fail. I finally give up and she throws me on the ground. "GET TO YOUR ROOM!" I flee away quickly and slam my door shut.

My mother hates me. Allow me to introduce her. Her name is Courtney Bianca Sterling. A 28 year old child who's been through more shit than babies sit in in their diapers. Yeah lame I know but it's true. She's been in and out of school throughout her life with multiple guys who just want to screw her. She's not the brightest marker in the box but surely beautiful. My mother is absolutely flawless on the outside, well when she wants to be. But in the past few years.. Hmm since I was born, from what my sister tells me, she's been different. Married my dad and ever since I've been born and 'stole' her name she's hated me. Apparently my mom didn't name me at birth, daddy did. Which is kinda odd but I don't know. It's funny how I know more about my mother than she probably didn't even know about herself. It's funny how I can know all of this and not walk one day beside her.

I keep everything to myself. Nothing will dare to cross or connect to my secrets. Nobody will know the secrets I have kept, the secrets I have done, or the secrets that lie in my own house. Nobody will know the inside. But people will believe the outside.

This is not the way an 11 year old should be treated, but yet nothing will tear me down.