Title: Than heaven more remote
Pairing: slightly there, potentially implied Kurogane x Fai
Words: 450
Genre: Angst? Pseudo-angst?
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I own nothing; CLAMP does. Isn't that lovely?
Summary/Excerpt/Hint: Fai's thoughts wander away in the grey mist
Notes: Post-Outo, pre-Shura. Title is taken from that of an Emily Dickinson poem, which has very little to do with the fic; but said title fit the mood of the story, so I shamelessly helped myself
They are walking sometime in the early hours, and just a pale sliver of light stretches out to their left. There are no shadows on the ground they walk on. The sky is crowded, purple and green.
The five of them are looking for the feather here on this plain, casting their eyes over ditches and shrubs, because they have been told that it might well appear to them, here on this plain, here at this hour, if they would only look.
Fai's thoughts wander away in the grey mist. The grass is wet and cool and the ends of his trousers and long coat are damp. He feels cold and misplaced and remembers a dream, a sweet dream of warm fires, the Great Hall filled with songs and laughter, families safe, and his kind king content. He recalls waking up with his face buried in the pillows, clutching the sheets and hoping he'd been quiet. He remembers remembering water and ice, the stillness of his body stretched on his narrow bed, and how he'd needed someone's touch to tether him.
That need for touch is aching now and weighing in his chest, pulling forward from him in tangling threads. He can almost see them stretch out, feeble strands and frayed twines, and Fai would like to rip them all apart but he can't stretch his arms because the sky is bearing down on him, and his shoulders are heavy; and Fai would like to falter, to crash against the ground, crawling and clawing, to have something near him and keep the cold distance away.
He wants to hide.
He stumbles – a wrong step on a slippery rock hidden in the wet grass. He gets back to his feet and someone reaches out a hand – it's Kurogane, dark shaped, solid and there. His fingers clamp down on Fai's arm, and Fai can feel their pressure through his coat. He feels their warmth as well, though he knows that he shouldn't; they don't linger, and Fai is glad. He wants to smile and tease, relieved, but he can't move with Kurogane watching, and Kurogane reaches out again, and everything Fai is just wants to move away but can't ---
Fai wakes up staring in the darkness.
A dream.
He hopes he hasn't woken anybody – they five of them are all sharing a room again, all nestled into blankets on the floor.
A long, strange dream.
He shifts onto his stomach and carefully slows down his breathing. Morning will come in a few hours and he needs to be rested – they have another day ahead of them.
When he wakes up he can't remember dreaming; his smile slides easily in place.
Notes 2: "[Kurogane's] fingers clamp down on Fai's arm" *snickers inanely* sorry, couldn't resist :D