Solona huffed, annoyed at her short height as she stood on her tip toes, stretching for the tome on the top of the shelf. The tips of her fingers barely grazed the bottom of the tome, the thick leather whispering mockingly against her fingertips. She scowled, considering if she should attempt jumping up to pull the book down.
Maker damn her short height. She was going to need a chair to climb on top of.
She gave up with another frustrated huff, dropping back down onto the heels of her feet. She looked about the huge library, searching for one of those horrendously uncomfortable chairs to drag over.
Something clamped down hard over her mouth, while an arm whipped around her midsection tightly. She blinked, shocked, and then someone was dragging her in between the shelves into the deeper shadows.
Solona bit down hard, but her teeth only found cold metal. Gauntleted hand, then. Shit, a Templar. She fought, kicking out with her legs but the attacker was so much stronger than she was. The iron grip on her body tightened, and the gauntleted hand over her lips stopped even the tiniest noise from leaking out.
Andraste preserve her, she's heard of the whispered rumors of Templars abusing the Tranquils and even some weak mages, but her? She'd thought herself safe! She was Irving's apprentice, for Maker's sake!
"Stop squirming! It's me." A low voice hissed into her ear, a familiar voice she hasn't heard for at least past two weeks despite seeing the owner of it every day.
She stilled in his grasp and after a moment he hesitantly lifted the hand covering her mouth. She did not scream.
"Cullen? Maker's breath, what are you doing here? You scared me!" She hissed, her quiet voice barely audible even in the silent library. He gently lowered her down onto the floor.
"What are you doing here?" He hissed back, eyes darting nervously to the huge doors of the library. "You are supposed to be in bed!"
She twisted her hands nervously, unable to look into his eyes.
"Maker's breath, you gave me a death scare when I saw your empty bed! I searched everywhere for you. What would you have done if you'd gotten caught in the library at this time of the night? And this is the Enchanters' library! You aren't supposed to be here even during the normal hours!"
"I haven't been caught yet." She poked her tongue out at him, though it did not stop her stomach from twisting guiltily.
"You've been here before?" He gaped at her, and Solona mentally slapped herself.
"You're mad. Solona Amell, you've gone completely mad." He muttered, eyes flashing angrily.
"Cullen…"
"Don't 'Cullen' me! Maker watch over us, you know how wary the Knight Commander has gotten lately, what with your crazy magic surges! He barely allows me to give you privacy for using chamber pots, and you thought it'd be a good idea to waltz into a restricted library by yourself at night? If anybody saw you, the Chantry will turn you Tranquil!"
She flinched at that, knowing he was completely right. She stayed mute, unable to meet his gaze. If she'd been caught he would have been punished severely too, for letting her wander off by herself. She knew she'd been reckless, selfish.
"I'm sorry." She mumbled.
He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.
"So what were you doing here? What's worth risking Tranquility?" He asked, peering down at her.
"I really am sorry, Cullen." She whispered. He stared at her for a moment before stepping around the shelf. He easily pulled out the tome she'd been reaching for earlier and flipped through the pages.
"This is what you were looking for?" He mumbled, coming back around into the dark shadows between the shelves where they hid. His eyes scored over the dusty pages quickly. She nodded.
"Maker's beard, this is the tome for master-level spells and glyphs for elemental magic! This is fifth-year Enchanter spells, Solona. What could you possibly want this for?"
"I've been studying it. I can almost do it perfectly now. Almost."
His attention snapped onto her, his golden eyes wide.
"You can perform master-level elemental spells?" His voice rose, though he lowered it quickly once he noticed. "How? Since when? Why didn't you tell me? What else have you been doing?"
"I can also do master-level creation spells. Healing spells." She mumbled, looking at her feet as she confessed.
"Solona! Maker's breath, what… how… Andraste preserve me, is this why you are always exhausted in the mornings? You are studying and practicing at night?" He demanded, though he was keeping himself quiet with effort.
She nodded again, watching him snap the tome shut.
"Why didn't you tell me?" He hissed.
"You weren't supposed to find out!"
"I'm your Templar! You get that, right? What if this spell blew up in your face? What if you got one arcane word wrong, and accidentally ripped apart the library? I'm supposed to keep you safe! How can I do that when I don't know you're performing master-level spells? The normal Cleansing for apprentices wouldn't be able to Cleanse spells this powerful!"
She shrank back. Cullen was, of course, right on every point.
He swiped a hand over his eyes, pressing lightly. "Why? Sol, you're an apprentice! You're a sixteen year old apprentice! You don't need to know these spells for another fifteen years at least."
"No, I need to know them now." She whispered.
"Why?"
"Because! Because I am Solona Amell, the most powerful mage ever in the Ferelden Circle!" She hissed, swiping out a hand angrily.
"Because I am the most talented apprentice in the Kinloch Hold! Because I am the First Enchanter Irving's star student! Because, the amazing, smart, powerful Solona Amell doesn't ever get anything wrong! I have to be perfect, and I have to know things I'm supposed to learn way later. Because Solona Amell doesn't ever not know things." She almost sneered the last words, tears welling up in her eyes.
He looked at her quietly before he handed her the tome. She accepted it wordlessly.
"You know, it's okay for you to not know things you haven't been taught. You don't need to sneak out at night to study." He said quietly, his voice a gentle caress.
She shook her head.
"No, I need to know. Cullen, you've been here barely few months. I've lived here almost my entire life. When I was young and the things we learned weren't that difficult, I could get by without studying. Magic came to me more naturally than to other children. And they all said, wow that girl is amazingly talented.
And then things started to get hard. The spells we learned were difficult, and I needed time to study. I made mistakes, just like other students. How could I not? I'm human too! But then the whispers started, the rumors.
They said behind my back; look, Solona isn't that special after all. Poor Irving, his apprentice isn't as talented as they initially thought. What a waste of his precious time."
She shivered, clutching the book tightly to his chest.
"Sol…"
"I could have lived with that. I could have endured the whispers. But that wasn't all. You know how the mages have different factions within the Circle, right? The ones with more radical views want Irving gone. They want a new First Enchanter who will speak out against the Templars more. They started to use me to wear down his reputation, his skills to judge people correctly. I was going to make Irving lose his title!"
She sighed, tilting her head back.
"So I started to study in secret. I get the normal lessons during the day with others, and the special lessons with Irving. And during the night I go and read and practice the advanced spells and pray to the Maker that I don't accidentally blow up the entire tower. Because if I don't, I can't stay ahead of everyone else, and if I am 'normal', it harms Irving and the other mages who just want to stay safe in the tower."
He stood wordlessly for a while, then opened his mouth.
"You still should have told me."
"Yeah, I know. I am sorry Cullen."
"So where should I meet you, and where?"
She blinked.
"What?"
"When and where should I meet up with you for these nightly visits to the libraries? You don't think I'm going to let you go by yourself now that I know?" He grinned, his golden eyes soft and sweet like honey.
"But, but you need to sleep! And if we ever get caught you're going to get in so much trouble…"
"Or we could just lie and say that I was in middle of taking you back to your apprentice quarters. Plus, you don't seem to be able to even reach half of these books on their tall shelves. Someone needs to help you actually get the books you need." He smiled cheekily, eyes bright and playful.
"As much as I want to hit you for that height comment, you really shouldn't. We'd be breaking the rules! I am used to it, but you…?"
"I am your Templar." He shrugged and smiled. As if that explained everything.
"And I am your Mage." She replied, and sighed.
Andraste preserve her, she was beginning to fall in love with her Templar.