Massive Effect: The Tale of the Shepard Family
Disclaimer: I don't own Mass Effect
Cast
Commander Shepard: Nicholas Cage
Kaiden Alenko: Keaanu Reeves
Garrus Vakarian: Bruce Willis
Wrex: Steve Austin
Udina: Arnold Schwarzenegger
Captain Anderson: Keith David
Liara: Emma Watson
Tali:
Benezia: Jennifer Lawrence
Saren: Jim Carry
Sovereign: Snoop Dogg
Background info
Commander Shepard is Vanguard and Chinese and french and British like me...so Cool. First part is written by me Alex. Second part will be written by Sarah.
Chapter 1: A New beginning
It was a dark and stormy and rainy night out in space. In space, the spaceship Normandy was floating in space. It was stealth ship and could turn invisible and go sub-zero. It had missiles, rockets, bombs, bullets, lasers, mines, missile rockets, rocket bombs, laser bullets and land-mines that came out from the guns on the ship.
Commander Shepard stood out on the balcony, his black hair which was all animey was flowing through the wind. He was wearing his Black with Red and strips N7 armor without the helmet. He had a shotgun on his right hip and a desert eagle on the other.
He then got hungry and backflipped inside the spaceship. He walked into kitchen and had breakfeast. He had toast, eggs, an omlette, waffles, captain crunch, orange juice, milk, bacon, sausuges, apple juice, muffins, english muffins, pancakes, lucky charms, frosted flakes and just bread.
He then finished eating and went over to the Cockpit, where Kaiden and Joker where.
"Sup Kai-dawg and Joker." Commander Shepard said as he walked into the Cockpit where they were.
"Not Much Commander." he said flying the spaceship in space. "You know why a Turian Spectre is on bored.
"Science of course!" Kaiden replied. "There's a bacon on the planet which is Eden Prime."
"I know that Kaiden. But something going on here. It's something big, like a conspuracey or something." Joker said.
The telephone started to ring, so Commander Shepard picked it up. "Commander, get your ass over here in the war room. We need you for the mission at hand." Captain Anderson said on the other line in his deep black voice.
Commander Shepard hanged up phone walked fastly to the war room where Captain Anderson and Spectre Nihlus where waiting.
"hello Captain Anderson, hello Spectre Nihlus. How's it going?" he asked.
"Good, but what no we need your help in retrieving a prothean bacon." Nihlus said.
"Plus, where testing you too see if your ready to be the first human spectre." Anderson finshed.
Just then...the TV turned on. There was video playing. A chick was shooting at robots and then it all staticy. "Wait go to 2.77.5335.5t5335.332244.455443 of the video." Anderson said and saw Geth. "Its the geth!" Anderson gasped shockingly.
"Wat r Geth?" Commander Shepard asked corious having never heard of this Geth.
"They are robots built by the koreans, but they accidently made them evil by mistake." Nihlus said. "The Geth and Koreans fought a big war and the Koreans lost. So now they live in spaceships strolling the galaxy for booty, booze and treasure living the pirate life." Commander Shepard felt sorry for the Koreans and how lost to robots.
"So if the Geth have back. What does that me?" Commander Shepard asked courageously with fear.
"The Geth have been hiding for 300 years. Who knows what kind of technonology they now possesse." Captain Anderson with dread in his deep black voice.
"Commander, we have to stop them from getting the Prothean Bacon. Who knows what they can do with that kind of power." Nihlus said shockingly at the top of his manly lungs..
"I guess we have to stop them then." Commander Shepard said manily.
Commander Shepard, Private Jenkins, Kaiden Alenko and Nihlus all went inside a shuttle and flew to Eden Prime. They landed on planet and jumped out. They walked long time, but no bad guys were attacking them.
"Huh, I thought we would have been attacked by now." Nihlus asked shockingly confused. "I'm going to scout ahead." He said, but was stopped by Commander Shepard.
"Hang on, Nihlus it may be a trap. We have to stick together." He warned and they continued marching until they saw a dead body.
"Hang on you guys, I need to investigate." Private Jenkins said walking over to body, but it was trap.
"JENKINS NO." Kaiden warned, but it was too late and Jenkins was dead.
Kaiden, Commander Shepard and Nihlus all looked at Jenkins body. It was sad. "Commander, What should we do about Jenkin's body?" Asked Kaiden.
"Leave it here. We'll come for it later." Shepard said and they continued walking, but faster. They saw geth and a firefight started. Commander and Kaiden started to shot at them with bullets from their guns until they were all dead.
Shepard saw a chick in pink and white armour walking up to them. "Hey! I'm Ashley Williams. How's it going?"
"I'm Commander Shepard. Want to join my team?"
"Sure!" And Commander and Kaiden and Ashley walked fastly to bacon.
Nihlus was up ahead, but still in view and went on hill and saw Saren, who was his best buddy in the all the rule.
"Hang on Shepard, I see someone I know. I'm going to go investigate." Nihlus said, but was stopped by Commander Shepard's extremely manly voice.
"Hold on, Nihlus, bad guys might be close by." Commander warned.
"Fuck that Shit! I'm going straight in!" Nihlus shouted like mad and back flipped down to the floor. Saren who was typing stuff on the computer that was evil. He got scared and turned around and pointed gun at Nihlus.
Nihlus raised up his hands and said. "Don't rob me bro." Saren put down gun. "Thanks and Hello and Saren." Nihlus said as he fisted his best friend.
"What are you doing here Nihlus?" Saren said trying not sound evil. I'll have to kill him soon or I risk the chance of the plan failing! "Nihlus! Behind you! Bad guys!" Saren said and Nihlus turned around.
He tried to shot his buddy, but Nihlus ducked and kicked him face.
"Ouch!" Saren yelped like mad. "You'll pay for that!" And Saren space boosted towards Nihlus, but Nihlus put up shield and blocked attack.
"Saren! Why R U working for Geth?" Nihlus asked. "They are the ones who caused the death of paradise!" Nihlus shouted in agony as he tried incinrate Saren, but the former spectre side stepped out of the way.
He then threw a shockwave towards Nihlus. He brought his shield up, but it was trick! Saren side stepped to the side and spaced boost towards Nihlus. He fell down and was stunned. Saren then pulled out his pistol and popped a cap in his ass.
Nihlus was now dead. "ha ha ha. Now nobody knows that I'm evil." Saren laughed like a crazy person.
"EXCEPT US!" Yelled a mysterious voice from above. Saren told around and saw Team!Eden.
"Commander Shepard. What's a human like you doing here?" He said racistly.
Commander got really mad and space boosted towards Saren. But Saren space boosted away from Commander. "Damn it! His out of range of my space boost." Shepard shouted angrily. He looked at Nihlus were he was dead. "Saren! He thought of you as a hero, but died thinking of you as killer!" Shepard shouted like mad into the sky.
"We have to keep moving or will never get to that beacon!" Kaiden exclaimed out loud
"Oh my god! Kaiden! Commander! Bombs!" Ashley said.
"Bombs?" Kaiden and Commander asked.
"There remote detonated. I'm going to see if I can disarm." Ashley said and bought out laptop and started hacking. "Hang on...Done. We can drop them in the ocean." They pushed the bombs into the ocean and started to walk towards bacon.
They walked really fast towards bacon, but had to fight geth along the way so it slowed them down. After an hour of walking fast, they made it to the bacon.
"Is that the Bacon?" Ashley asked pointing at the bacon. BUT IT WAS TRAP! A bunch of Geth jumped out of christmas presents and started shooting.
Commander, Ashley and Kaiden took cover behind some cover. Ashley threw grenades and shot at them with her assault rifle and soldier powers. Kaiden used his sentinel powers to weaken them and Commander used his vanguard powers to kill a lot of Geth. After a while, they killed all the geth.
Ashley walked up to bacon and was going to touch it but was stopped. "Ash! No." Shepard said and tackled her to ground. The bacon floated Shepard from the ground and put visions of the rappers and the cycle into his brain. Everything went black and he fell asleep.
Back at the Normandy.
Ash, kaidan, Joker and Anderson were all in the Medbay with Dr. Chawkwas. Commander Shepard was on medicine bed and was in coma.
"Doc, how long is the Commander gonna be asleep?" Kaiden asked.
"2 to 3 weeks." She answered.
"Wat!" Ashley exclaimed shockingly. "We have to stop Saren! There's no time to wait!" She shouted like mad.
"Saren? On Eden Prime? What was he doing there?" Anderson asked.
"He killed Nihlus and took control of Geth." Kaiden warned.
"I see." Anderson asked calmly shocked as he walked away. "Hang on, I need to make a call." Anderson walked towards the telephone and called Shepard's twin sister.
Commanda Shepard.
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