Trish de la Rosa was a bright, confident, beautiful young woman. She held her own, got new jobs almost everyday, managed the pop star Austin Moon like a professional, and took bologna from no one. Her friends all admired her steadfast attitude and disregard for anyone's opinion of herself besides her own. If there was one word you'd never pair with Trish de la Rosa, it was insecure. In a room full of black and white, she would gladly wear bright pink.
Recently she had been even happier than normal. She had been dating a very special boy for a couple of weeks now, Damon. "Very special" were the words Trish's best friend Ally had been using, which Trish shrugged off but supposed they were somewhat true. For one thing, he was cute, and being cute never hurt anyone. He was also a complete Casanova. He was mischievously charming and had a similar sense of humor to Trish's, as in witty and harsh. He reminded one of a renegade thief. All these traits together meant Trish had fallen, and fallen hard. She'd not admit this to anyone but Ally, but Damon seemed to be her dream guy. Too good to be true, almost. And tonight she was going out to dinner with Damon and his friends for the first time.
Trish was spending her free time before the outing with her own friends, specifically by leaning against the counter of Sonic Boom texting Damon while watching Ally rush back and forth helping customers. It was a busy day in the Dawson's music store, and Ally's flowery skirt flowed as she hurried between locations. Huffing for breath she looked over to Trish "Hey Trish, you think you could give me a hand here?"
Trish glanced up at her phone "Um, I'm kind of busy here Ally."
Ally glanced at Trish's cellphone. "Texting Damon again?"
"Yup," Trish replied, looking back down at her hands. Ally sighed and rolled her eyes while smiling. She couldn't blame Trish for wanting to text her boyfriend, and this would just give Ally more to tease Trish about later when she had the time. Oh gosh time. Ally returned to the demanding customers.
A few minutes later the guys walked in, Austin and Dez. Well, Austin walked in, the tall ginger danced his way in energetically, bumping into quite a few people. Austin was humming music that wasn't his own. Both of them were dressed in work-out clothes and were dripping with sweat. Austin hoped up and sat on the counter. "Hey Ally, hey Trish!" Trish glanced up at Austin and Dez and nodded before returning to her world of messaging.
Ally approached in a panic. "Oh, Austin get off the counter! You're all gross and sweaty and I don't want to have to clean these counters a second time today!"
Austin slipped off the counter, pretending to be offended. "Aw, not even a 'hello' Als? I think someone needs a hug." Austin opened his arms and approached Ally, who pushed him away.
"Ew, Austin, stop! Go take a shower or something!" Ally squealed as Austin laughed and backed down, understanding Ally's hatred for sweaty hugs. "Besides, I don't need a hug, what I need is some help around the store! Ever since summer band camps started there have been floods of parents and kids needing instruments. I mean, I love that all these kids are getting into music, but if I have to carry one more tuba down from the store room I think my arms will pop." Ally held out her arms and let them dangle limply.
Austin frowned at Ally's spaghetti arms. He wished Mr. Dawson would hire someone to help out; it really was too much for just Ally. Then he grinned. "I'll help you out this week, Ally. This store could use the presence of a big, strong man anyway." Austin flexed his arms.
"I don't know about man," Ally teased and Austin stuck out his tongue "but thanks Austin. That would be amazing." Ally would have hugged him, but again, sweat. Ally felt a tug at her skirt. She looked down and saw a little girl.
"Um, excuse me miss. Can you show me the instruments? I want to be a magician!" the adorable five-year-old asked shyly.
"I got this one, Ally," Austin said, and then hoisted the girl onto his back who squealed and giggled and left the counter to give her a tour around the store.
Ally's attention was on the two long enough to hear Austin tell the girl what a musician was and then turned to Dez who was still dancing to himself. "So, what were you guys doing that made you sweat so much anyway?"
Dez's feet picked up tempo as he sang "Zumba!" he spun around. Trish laughed. "Hey, don't laugh at my dancing!"
Trish looked up "What? No I wasn't laughing at your dancing, though you do look like a complete goof ball. I was laughing at something Damon said. Geez freckles, you're not the center of the universe."
Dez stuck out his tongue while Ally peaked over Trish's shoulder to read the text. Her mouth gaped as she read it aloud. "'If Ally were any less cool she'd be hosting Wheel of Fortune?' What's that supposed to mean?" Ally even liked that show!
Trish put a reassuring hand on Ally's shoulder. "Oh Ally, it's just a joke." Ally mumbled something along the lines of "Yeah, okay.." while Trish added "Besides, you are uncool!"
"Trish!"
"In the coolest way possible!" Trish assured her before reading another text from Damon and laughing again.
Ally turned her attention back to Dez, shaking of Damon and Trish and their mean sense of humor. "So, what's Zumba?"
Dez finally stopped dancing and wiped his forehead. "Phew! Okay, so Zumba is this crazy fun mix of Latin dance and aerobics. Everyone's shouting and clapping and there's an instructor but you can basically do whatever you want. I even got on stage next to the instructor in front of everyone! But then apparently you weren't allowed to do that and I was pulled off by a super nice cop named Steven!"
Ally furrowed her eyebrows. "Dancing?" Ally couldn't dance to save her life.
"Well, yeah, but no one's paying attention to anyone else anyway. The instructor doesn't even call people out. You can do whatever you want! And guess what! There's going to be a free Zumba-thon next Saturday at the gym! All day Zumba from 10 till 10!" Dez held up a crinkled flier and handed it to Ally. Ally took it hesitantly. "You guys should come with Austin and me! Team Austin would totally rock the gym."
"I don't know… Trish?" Ally turned to her friend for advice.
Trish didn't look away from her phone as she responded. "Yeah, sure, I love dancing."
"All right Trish!" Dez exclaimed and held up a hand for her to high-five. Trish just glared at him out of the corner of her eye. Dez pulled his hand away. "Come on Ally, will you please come? We can dance around you in a circle and no one would see how embarrassingly bad you are!"
Ally sighed. "Okay, if it'll make you happy, I'll come."
Dez cheered. "All right! I knew you'd come! Austin wasn't sure, considering how bad you are at dancing. I mean, you even broke Austin's foot with your dancing once, that's pretty bad. But I told him, I told him you'd put your friends above your own humiliation. Man, you're such a bad dan-"
"Okay, we get it Dez." Ally cut him off. She knew Dez didn't mean to be insulting so she just laughed it off. "I have to get back to working, there's a line at the cash register."
Trish closed her phone "Right, I have to go get ready for tonight. I have to do my hair still."
"Trish, you've only got three hours," Dez teased, connoting that Trish's hair would require much more time.
"You want to start that with me, carrot top?" Trish threatened, holding up a fist. Dez covered his face by instinct and shook his head. Trish cackled evilly. "Okay, cool, then I'm out of here." Trish waved to Ally, walked past Dez, and headed for home.
Trish grinned at her reflection in the mirror, turning to glance at herself from all angles. She was wearing her absolute favorite dress, a red and black number she had worn to Ally's sweet 16. Trish had debated whether Damon was worth the effort, but in the end she couldn't resist looking her best. Her makeup was careful. She highlighted all the curves and contours of her eyes to make them pop and wore the obvious red lipstick to match her dress. She even put a flower clip in her hair. "You look hot, Trish de la Rosa," she told herself proudly. Just then she heard honking from outside, that was her cue. Trish rushed to leave the house shouting "BYE EVERYONE!" behind her. She was met at the front door by her concerned mother.
"Trish, was that honking for you?" Mrs. De la Rosa crossed her arms in disapproval.
Trish nodded "Yeah, that's Damon."
"I wish he'd come to the door like a gentleman," Mrs. De la Rosa seemed cross.
"Mom, Damon's just chill. That door stuff is so formal," Trish defended.
Trish's mother sighed, looked her daughter up-and-down, and then smiled. "Well okay, you look beautiful. Have a good time. Be back by eleven," she kissed her daughter's forehead.
Trish scrunched her nose at the gesture, not enjoying the wet feeling of forehead kisses, but she smiled at the compliment. "Thanks, mom, can I go now?" Her mother nodded and Trish walked out the door to the sound of more impatient honking. She saw Damon's black convertible and hopped in the front seat.
"What took so long?" Damon asked, glancing behind him to back out of Trish's driveway.
Trish rolled her eyes "My mom was being old-fashioned."
Damon got onto the road and now driving was easy. "Well, whatever, as long as you're here, babe," he leant over and pecked Trish's cheek.
"Ew," she joked, smiling to herself. "Keep your eyes on the road."
Damon shrugged. "Oh, so Trish, these are my friends, Josh and Hannah." He gestured to the back seat and adjusted the mirror so he could see them "Josh, Hannah, Trish."
Trish turned to see the strangers. "Hello Josh and Hannah," she said.
Josh lifted his chin as if to say "Sup" without using the word. He was a relatively tall boy who dressed a bit like Austin, only darker. His black bangs covered half his face. Hannah was a tall, skinny girl with fake blonde hair, a fake tan, fake eyelashes, just everything fake. She was sporting a skin-tight pink dress. Trish wondered if she was in the presence of a Barbie doll. "I like your flower," Hannah said with a fake smile.
"Oh, thanks," Trish said, almost feeling bad for instantly disliking the girl.
Hannah nodded "It really distracts from the rest of your face." Josh and Damon laughed.
"Hey! You want to take that back or-" Trish began angrily, but Damon used one hand to calm her down.
"Trish, calm down, it's just a joke. She's not serious."
Trish frowned and turned back around in her seat to face front. "Yeah, sure." She muttered to herself, mocking the blonde privately. She didn't want to make too bad of an impression in front of Damon's friends.
The restaurant was nice and hip. The atmosphere was intriguing, as the whole building was lit by black lights. Trish had made the right choice in dress, as while the place wasn't casual, it also wasn't terribly formal. It apparently served tapas, which as Trish understood, was a series of appetizer sized dishes, as well as salads. It was just the type of place she expected Damon to like, classy but edgy.
The group eased into a booth, Trish and Damon across Hannah and Josh. A waitress came by, handed them menus, and took their drink orders. Damon decided to speak for everyone due to his intense machismo. "Right, um, Josh and I like Mountain Dew, and the girls will have water."
The waitress nodded but Trish stopped her "Um, I'm sorry, I want a coke please."
Hannah looked at Trish disgusted "Are you sure? That's a lot of empty calories."
Trish gave the girl a quick glare "Well, I don't drink coke everyday, but considering I want to actually have fun tonight, yes I'm sure." The waitress smiled at Trish and assured everyone she'd be back to take their food orders shortly.
Hannah placed her hands in her lap. "Well, I for one haven't had any calories today, and don't intend to waste them on soda."
Trish's mouth dropped. "You haven't eaten today? No wonder you're so transparent."
Hannah snarled. "Weight control is all about calorie intake. When you learn to control that, you have control over your entire image."
"You do this everyday? That can't be safe. You look like a skeleton. Doesn't she Damon?" Trish turned to her boyfriend, who looked at his very offended friend.
"Hannah's a beautiful girl, Trish. Maybe you could learn a thing or two from her."
Trish's expression hardened. "What does that mean?" Damon rolled his eyes and ignored Trish's question. Was he implying Trish needed to lose weight? Trish was perfectly healthy. Sure she wasn't the tiniest individual, but she was just as athletic as anyone, even more so than Ally who was the tiniest person she knew before this Hannah girl. She could dance and play sports with the best of them. Health and control wasn't about numbers like weight, it was about confidence and activity. Trish decided to push the comment to the back of her head; she was probably looking too much into it. Damon was just defending his friend, instead of helping her for some reason.
The conversation transitioned into something about Josh and Damon's band. Music, this was a topic Trish could get into. She mentioned that she was currently Austin Moon's manager, and everyone seemed surprised, but not really. They asked if she could maybe manage them, too, and Trish said she'd have to hear them play first, but knew she would as long as she was dating Damon. Besides, she liked being a manager. Damon and Josh high-fived.
The waitress returned, this time for food orders. Josh and Damon both got five dishes each. Hannah ordered just a salad.
"Really? A salad? That's all you're going to get?" Trish asked "After not eating all day?"
"With dressing on the side," Hannah added, almost as if she were ashamed of her "indulging."
"Oh, wow, praise the lord. Barbie's living it up. Maybe you'll put some Crystal Lite in your water, live on the edge."
Damon interrupted Trish, his machismo getting the better of him again "She'll have the salad, too."
"What?" Trish looked at him like he was crazy "The deal here says two tapas dishes and a salad," she pointed to the menu as if it weren't in huge bold letters on the front.
"Well, I already ordered your tapas for myself. I'm just looking out for you, babe."
"Don't 'babe' me," Trish frowned. Looking out for her? Was he seriously making another comment about her size? Trish sighed and grunted "Fine, whatever, yeah I'll have the house salad." The waitress gave Trish a sympathetic look as she wrote down the order, then left with a smile.
The conversation then returned to Josh and Damon's band, which was called something stupid that Trish snickered at and didn't even bother to remember. They asked about working for Austin Moon, and even inquired whether they could practice with him sometime. They talked about needing background dancers, and Trish told them that she was a good dancer; she even danced on stage with Shiny Money! They didn't believe her though and proceeded to ask Hannah if she knew how to dance. Trish grew suspicious of their motives. And why did they dismiss her as a dancer? Trish squeezed her arms to her side to appear smaller, and then realized what she was doing and stopped. Trish de la Rosa is perfect she forced herself to remember.
The food came, and the house salad that went with the two tapas dishes that Eric ordered was smaller than the appetizer plates. And it was mostly cucumber. She picked them out. She hated cucumber. Damon gladly swallowed them almost whole. She picked at her salad while Josh, Hannah, and Damon were gossiping meanly about someone she didn't know. At one point Damon squeezed Trish's "adorable, chubby cheeks" then told her to chill, he was just joking. Her stomach growled and she was tempted to drink Barbie's untouched side dressing in one shot. She didn't for fear of more snarky comments. She had to tip the waitress because Damon paid for her meal, which was really 75% his. The waitress slipped her an extra handful of mints, so Trish tipped her well. Damon went on the rounds and dropped his friends off first. Then Trish and Damon talked about her friends, but mostly Austin, and Trish noticed that what she had thought was harsh humor was just insults followed by "just kidding." They arrived at her drive way and Damon put the car in park. Trish climbed out of the car, then waited for Damon.
"What?" Damon asked.
"Aren't you going to walk me up to the door?" Trish asked. What she had defended at the beginning of the evening as modern now seemed simply ungentlemanly.
"Um, the car's still running," Damon gestured to the keys he hadn't pulled out of the ignition.
"Right," Trish said, calmly before boiling over. "We're over. Bye asshole." She slammed the car door shut before Damon could say anything and stomped into her house. Damon rolled down the window and yelled something about not slamming the doors of his very expensive car and then some beginning for her to still be his band's manager, but Trish didn't pay attention.
Trish walked straight past her mother, who was reading in the living room as she waited up for her daughter, and headed directly for her room. She grabbed a pillow and screamed into it. What had she seen in that guy? He had obviously just been using her for Austin. Trish was prepared to rip off what had once been her favorite dress and to hide it in the back of her closet, but then she walked past her mirror.
Trish stopped. She stood staring at her reflection, which a few hours ago she had been so happy to see. All those side comments made at dinner flooded her head. She sucked in her stomach as much as she could and squished her sides together as much as possible. She hid her cheeks in her mouth, pulled loose skin from her neck back. She looked at her beautiful, tan legs, but only saw thighs and skin. Maybe that Hannah girl had a point, maybe it was self control. Trish shook her head trying to banish those thoughts and turned from the mirror. She was just overly upset because it was late and she just broke up with a jerk. She'd feel better in the morning.
The following day Trish headed to Sonic Boom for her lunch break. She had gotten a new job at a sports store, which she was excited to tell her friends about since she could now get them a discount on workout clothes for Saturday. What a good friend she was, they would owe her big time for this later. "Guess who got a job at The Penalty Box!" she announced walking in, but no one was paying attention. Middle schoolers were running back and forth looking at all the instruments and arguing, and Ally was even more flustered than the day before. Austin was stacking boxes and carrying around heavy instruments, looking very fatigued. Trish was glad he was there to help Ally, this before school rush tired her out every year.
Trish walked behind the counter and waited for Ally. She took the moment to delete Damon from her contacts and clear out her inbox. Ally then ran over punching numbers into the cash register. As she rung up a bassoon for a boy who had graduated from the oboe she noticed her friend. "Oh, hey Trish! You didn't text me last night. How'd your date with Damon go?"
Trish shrugged "I dumped him."
Ally handed the bassoon over to it's new owner and closed the cash register for a moment. "What? Trish I'm so sor-" Trish shook her head to signal that Ally was free to tell the truth "relieved. Oh my gosh, that guy was a jerk. I know you thought he was funny, but there's a difference between funny and mean."
Trish nodded "Yeah, yeah I know. He was a total butthead. I'm sorry I ever thought he was cool."
Ally smiled at her friend reassuringly "Well, it's over now. Hey, Dez is bringing us all sandwiches from Sub Shack for lunch." Ally rung up more customers as she spoke, smiling at each of them.
Trish gasped. "Ally? Letting us eat in the store?" She exaggerated her shock.
Ally rolled her eyes. "I know, I know, I'm breaking my own rules, but it's so busy here, and Austin's being such a big help, I wouldn't want to starve him. So, I figured we could bend the rules just this week. Provided we are very, very careful." Trish laughed, right, Dez would be careful.
Ally went back to working, and Trish even helped out with the cash register for a few minutes until Dez arrived, proudly carrying a box of sandwiches and placing it on the counter. "ORDER UP!" he yelled, as if he were a chef or waiter. Everyone rushed over.
"Okay, so I got an Italian-sans-turkey for Austin, chicken and veggies for Ally, anchovy and bacon for me, and turkey with swiss for Trish." Dez announced in the order he pulled out the sandwiches. He was surprisingly reliable for the task, remembering everyone's favorite sub.
Austin almost drooled all over himself. "Wow, thanks man! My favorite!" he what-uped his buddy before taking a huge bite into his sandwich.
"Yeah, nice job Dez!" Ally said gratefully while handing everyone napkins. Already a few people were queued up behind Austin and Ally requesting assistant, so they took their food and multitasked.
Trish looked at the sandwich, her stomach growled and she gladly picked it up. "Yeah, nice job not messing things up for once."
"Hey! I don't always mess things up!" Dez protested. "I mean, like, there was only that time where I ordered a kangaroo for Austin's music video, or the time I lured Baby Alligator into Shiny Money's boat, oh, hah, and that time where I gave up the world record for Austin after he had given it up to me, oh or how about…"
Dez continued, counting his mess-ups on two hands, while Trish ignored him and reached for her food. Looking at the pile of bread and meat in her hand she suddenly remembered all the insults and advice from her group date again. Was it really about control? Control could be empowering… No, that's ridiculous. Trish was fine the way she was… wasn't she? She went ahead and took a bite of her sandwich. Immediately afterward she started to feel sick and disgusted with herself. She looked down at her stomach, her thighs, her know, it wouldn't hurt just to skip one lunch. Lots of people live with hunger around the world. She put the food down. Dez was just about take off his shoes to count with his toes when Trish began to leave.
"Hey Trish, you barely touched your sandwich," Dez cocked his head in confusion.
"I'm not hungry," Trish lied. "Besides, my break's almost over. I should head back to work."
Dez shrugged and waved to Trish as she left, then grabbed her sandwich, paired it with his, and stuffed both in his mouth.
For Trish, skipping lunch lead to skipping dinner. She had controlled herself for that long, might as well not give up now. She'd had a big breakfast, an entire yogurt with some banana slices. She drooled a bit from her bedroom when the smell of tomato sauce reached her, but the idea of eating revolted her. Trish was confused and upset, not understanding where all this internal conflict was coming from. But... that Hannah girl was okay, and Trish wasn't going to let herself get a skeleton. She just wanted to quickly shed a few pounds. That's all. She'd go back to normal soon.
Trish didn't tell anyone about her eating habits, or lack-there-of, which continued through the week. She was scared, and Ally was too busy anyway, better to not worry her. In fact, Ally and Austin were so busy it was easy to hide. There were even a couple days where they were so busy that Trish couldn't come by. On those days Dez still dutifully delivered lunch to Trish's work. He rather enjoyed being a delivery boy for his friends. Friday was one of these days.
Trish had been relieved to receive the text from Ally saying that it would be best if Trish didn't come by. She wouldn't have to make up excuses. She began organizing some tennis rackets by size, when she cringed at the sound of an all too familiar voice.
"Hey Trish!" Dez jumped behind her. Trish screamed and dropped the rackets she was holding. She turned to hit Dez, but then noticed her boss standing nearby and sighed. She'd kept the job for this long, using her employment to distract her from other things, no use in losing it today. This was her longest running job.
Trish groaned and leant down to pick up the rackets. "What do you want, Freakoid?"
Dez held up a box from sub shack. "Delivery!"
Trish closed her eyes and took a deep breathe. Great, more lying. She grabbed her sandwich from the bag. "Uh, thanks or whatever. I'll eat it on break." She walked to put the sandwich out of sight, planning to throw it away later.
Dez frowned as he watched Trish hide the meal he'd delivered. "Why aren't you eating anything?"
"What?" Trish asked, alarmed. Her heart skipped a beat in terror.
"I haven't seen you eat anything all week. Are you sick? Does Ally know? Does Austin? Are you guys hiding something from me? Oh god, you're dying aren't you! NO TRISH! WE ONLY JUST BECAME FRIENDS! YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME!" He flung his arms around Trish and began sobbing.
"Get off of me, Doodlehead! I'm not dying!" Trish forcefully pushed Dez away and he wiped his face. "Now will you just leave me alone?"
Dez shook his head "Not until I see you eat something."
Trish rolled her eyes, wishing he would just go away. "Look, I just haven't been hungry lately because my dad's been making pancakes every morning. Nothing major," she lied. Dez walked over and grabbed the sandwich she hid. "Dez! Stop it!"
"Take it," Dez ordered, forcing it into Trish's hand.
Trish tried to hit the sub away, but Dez stood firmly. "FINE! You want me to eat it? Then will you leave?" Dez nodded. Trish glared and looked down at the sandwich. Just do this Trish, to get him off your tail. It did look good. Dez had gotten her favorite, as usual. She closed her eyes.
Dez watched Trish take a bite and grinned. "Happy?" she asked, mouth full.
"Yup! Okay, now to deliver to Austin and Ally! Woot woot! The people can't live without their deliveries!" Dez spun, complete mood swing. He was so easily distracted. "Bye Trish! See you tomorrow at Zumba!"
Trish said nothing as Dez left. She sucked on the food in her mouth. She wanted to swallow. Oh, how she wanted to swallow. It tasted so good. But she couldn't… it wasn't like she had control. Trish walked over to a trashcan, spitting out the food and throwing away the rest of her lunch. She then continued working until her shift was over and then went home to go straight to her bedroom and lie on her bed. She had a terrible headache.
Saturday morning the group met up at the gym, dressed for the workout they were promised to get. "Woo! I'm pumped!" Ally declared, pumping her fists in the air.
"Whoa, what's gotten into you Ally?" Austin asked. Not that Ally wasn't always energetic, but she was about to dance in front of a bunch of people.
"I'm just super glad to be doing anything but working in the music store. This'll be a great way to end band camp week," Austin quickly nodded in agreement, rubbing the sore muscles in his arms that came from all that heavy lifting. "What about you, Trish? You excited?"
"What? Oh, um, yeah, whatever." Trish hadn't been paying attention, she felt a little weaker than normal. A little nauseous.
Before Ally could be concerned for her friend, Dez impatiently pulled everyone into the room. It was apparently time to start. The gym was somewhat organized in rows of people, but mostly it was a jumbled mess of people who took whatever space they could fit comfortably in. Team Austin took their own row just as the instructor was stepping up onto a semi-elevated platform. Ally nudged Trish and they both giggled over the good-looking buff man standing in front of them wearing skin-tight athletic clothes.
He gave a short speech about what Zumba was for new comers and said how happy he was that so many people were willing to try. Then he talked about healthy, how it was important to drink lots of water and make sure you eat healthily before and after.
"Most importantly, this is for having fun! If you feel you need to sit out at any point to take a break, go ahead and do it. Don't push yourself too hard. Just try your best and own yourself!" Everyone cheered at the final words of his speech, ready to get started. Music started and they were talked through a quick warm up before launching into full-on Zumba.
The way Zumba worked was the instructor danced to high-temp music, yelling out what to do and how to do it as it was done, and you simply followed. Some people got it immediately; some people took a bit longer. In any song the same movements would be repeated many times, so there was time to learn and become comfortable. The thing was, the instructor was so positive and energetic and fun that after a few minutes of feeling awkward, everyone let loose and stopped caring about correctness. It really was just about moving in rhythm with your body.
There were also very few breaks. It was just straight dancing, one song would merge straight into another. Everyone had to decide for themselves when to go get water or stand to the side for a moment. Ally was probably flailing a bit more than the average person, but she didn't really care. She secretly loved dancing, but just never would in public. She heard Austin yell "Go Ally!" a couple times as she whipped her hair back and forth and thrust her hips to the side. She laughed and then cheered on Dez, who was very flamboyant in his dancing, probably something that comes with being so tall and skinny. After about six songs Ally felt dehydrated. "Hey, guys, let's go get water." Everyone agreed and quickly followed her to their bags.
They all took a swig from their water bottles and prepared to run back in, when Ally noticed Trish, who was leaning against the wall. "Hey, Trish, maybe you should sit out for a little bit longer, you don't look so good."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Trish yelled defensively, even though she really did feel awful. She felt dizzy and like she'd throw up—not that she had anything to throw-up.
Ally frowned. "It means you look pale and woozy. I'll sit out with you if you want."
Trish shook her head. She could do this, she would not let her body get the best of her. She had the control. She had the control. "I'm fine, let's go back."
Austin reached into his bag and pulled out a granola bar. "Maybe you'd feel better if you ate something."
"NO!" Trish yelled, annoyed. "Come on," she lead the way back to their places, while the rest of the team shrugged at each other in confusion before following.
They started dancing again at full blast, but after only a few minutes Trish had to stop again. She held her pounding head and covered her ears so all the jumping and yelling around her would hurt less. The ground was shaking, she was shaking, and everything around her was spinning. She saw red, and then somehow heard a concerned Ally saying her name before she collapsed to the ground.
Trish opened her eyes to see Austin and Ally hovering above her. She found herself lying on the couch in Ally's practice room, upstairs from Sonic Boom. She tried to sit up but her head felt so heavy. "Ah!" she let out in discomfort. "What's going on..?"
"You fainted during the Zumbathon," Ally explained, helping Trish sit up a bit more by putting more pillows behind her.
"I carried you here," Austin added, to help further orient Trish into reality.
"I did?" Trish asked in disbelief. She had never fainted before, ever. Fainting was for the weak and the sick. Her friends nodded in confirmation. "Whoa…" was all Trish could say. How surreal and… scary.
"We would have taken you home, but, um, Dez told us something we wanted to confirm before telling your parents or not." Austin looked at Ally as he spoke to Trish to make sure he was saying the right thing. Trish's interest peaked immediately.
"Dez!" she exclaimed as she sat up. Dez was hiding in the back of the room, tangling and untangling his fingers nervously. He looked pretty upset and guilty, as if he blamed himself for Trish fainting.
Ally put a hand on Trish's shoulder to get her to lie down again. "Um, yeah. He said that you haven't been eating," Ally stated nervously, as if she were confused by her own words. "Is that true, Trish?"
Trish looked away from her friends, whose eyes had grown wider with concern. She considered lying again, but what would that help now? She… she didn't have the control she thought she had. She realized now that this had gotten out of hand, and she couldn't keep the burden to herself anymore. She was sick and weak. Trish sighed, closed her eyes, but her lip, and then responded "Yes."
Ally gasped, her jaw dropping in shock and sadness. She honestly hadn't believed Dez, or hadn't wanted to. It didn't seem like something Trish would do. Her friend had always been so strong and confident, why would she do something so dangerous? Austin's mouth also hung open, and his eyes grew sad. Dez curled up and hid in his knees.
Ally composed herself, realizing Trish looking away, ashamed. "Trish, that's terribly unhealthy. Not at all?"
Trish gulped and shook her head.
"Oh Trish…" Ally reached out to take her friend's hands.
"How long has this been going on?" Austin asked, only not reaching out to touch Trish's shoulder because the last time he did such a thing she almost bit him.
"Since Sunday…" Trish muttered, looking down at her an Ally's hands because she couldn't stand seeing her friends' sad faces. "The day after my group date with Damon."
Suddenly angry expressions flashed onto the faces of all three of Trish's friends. "What did that jerk do?" Ally asked, clenching her hands into a fist. Trish winced; her fingers were still trapped there.
"Yeah, tell us Trish! Whatever he did, I bet Dez and I could take him!" Austin jumped up and started hopping, jabbing the air.
"Yeah!" Dez joined in, coming out from his dark corner of the room and fake punching Austin.
Trish pulled her hands forcefully from Ally tight grip and leant her forehead into her palm. "He just… he kept making snide side-comments about my appearance and size. I know I shouldn't have let them get to me, and I don't know why I did. I mean, at first I didn't, but the more I heard them the more they got inside my head… I guess I put too much stock in his opinion because I thought he was cool or something. Something stupid like that. God, I was stupid. And there was this girl, one of his friends, Hannah, and she talked about how weight was all about self-control and all she was eating all day was a side salad without dressing, and at first I thought it was crazy. But then it got in my head… she managed to make it sound like a good thing to do. Like, every diet is just about self control, right? They say indulgence is a sin. And I came home from the dinner and just felt really bad about myself. I looked in the mirror and, I don't know, I seem distorted and strange… So the next day I just… I just decided to try it. You know, portion control. Skipping lunch, and that was it, but…" Trish was sitting up now, so Austin and Ally crowded the seats on either side of her, providing support and listening intently. Which was good. Trish sniffed and wiped her face, her eyes were watering.
"But skipping lunch lead to skipping dinner and then I convinced myself if I ate I would be giving into weakness. Suddenly it became a struggle with myself and my stomach and my reflection in the mirror. I was… I was really confused and upset about nothing and everything. I mean, like, you don't get it. The thought of eating made me feel sick. And I couldn't... I just... I'm sorry, I've let you all down. Trish de la Rosa is a pathetic human being." Trish looked forward, still not daring to look at anyone. She suddenly felt arms around her back. Austin and Ally held her securely.
"Trish, you are not a pathetic human being," Austin said firmly.
Ally nodded. "Everyone deals with insecurities, Trish. It's not a weakness. I mean, just look at me! I'm insecure about everything. You don't have to keep things like this secret. We could have helped you through, instead of this getting out of hand." She spoke calmly, even though Trish could see Ally's eyes were also wet with uncried tears. That's Ally, so loving and empathetic.
Dez was pacing in the middle of the room. "Wait, I'm confused." Everyone looked up. "So you did all that because some guy said bad things about you?"
"Uh, yeah…" This wasn't helping. Trish was tempted to walk over and punch Dez.
"But, you're like… beautiful. Why would you want to change?" Dez seemed sincerely confused. The situation couldn't be simplified, yet he was trying to. But he did help, a little bit.
"He's right," Ally agreed. "Normally, when you haven't been starving yourself, you look so bright and healthy. You're the most gorgeous person I know."
Austin nodded. "I agree with all of this. You're perfect just the way you are, Trish."
Trish let herself smile a bit. Hearing Ally say these things was one thing, hearing Austin and Dez say them was another. "Thanks guys…"
"And if you're honestly concerned about your weight, which you shouldn't be, there are far better ways to go about losing a few pounds. The most important thing is being healthy. Crash dieting will just hurt you. Please promise me you'll nev-"
Trish cut Ally off there. "No, I've learned my lesson, honestly. I never want to faint or feel that out of control again. It was terrifying." Trish was indeed smiling again, it was god to have such supportive friends.
"Okay, I'm glad. But you still need to talk to your parents about this, just in case." Trish groaned, but knew Ally was right. She also knew that Ally would personally drag Trish to her house if she didn't agree. "Okay?"
"Okay," Trish agreed before she was squished by hugs from Team Austin. "Okay, okay, guys, this was nice but I need some space. I still feel a little dizzy. Let's go get some lunch."
The next day Sonic Boom was finally relaxed. Ally had time to greet Trish the moment she walked in. Austin and Dez were looking at the previous year's school yearbook on the counter.
"Hey Trish! How are you?" Ally asked, concerned.
Trish smiled. "I'm feeling way better. I talked to my parents yesterday like I promised, and I got my favorite dinner AND breakfast out of it! Score!"
"Trish!" Ally scolded.
"Oh, right, I also got their support and yada yada. There's nothing more beautiful than family, or whatever you say." Trish was messing with Ally. She honestly was glad she had told her parents. They had been worried about her all week, and as soon as she opened up they stopped being angry and started listening. And, again, the favorite meals didn't hurt.
"Hey, look Trish! We found that Hannah girl in the yearbook!" Austin called out. Trish walked over.
"Whoa, that's Barbie?" The picture was of a tanner girl, with fuller cheeks, flushed with natural pink. She looked happier and prettier, and not like a skeleton.
"Yeah, she was hot!" Dez said. Trish hit him. "What, what did I say?"
At that moment, who else would walk into the store but Hannah and Josh. Josh needed a new guitar pick. Trish was tempted to hide, but then something stopped her. She stole the yearbook from Dez, who protested until she glared, scribbled something on the front page, and then walked over to Hannah the moment Josh was busy.
"Hey, Barbie!" she called.
Hannah looked over. "Oh, uh, hi…" she didn't seem thrilled to see Trish.
"So, I just saw this picture of you," she held up the book. Hannah looked away embarrassed. "You looked pretty, so I thought I'd tell you."
"Oh... thank you…"
Trish closed the book and handed it to Hannah. "Look, I know it's not my business, but my mom and I did some research last night about eating disorders. There are eight different self-help groups in the Miami area that deal with teens alone. There's even one at our school."
"What?" Hannah took the book hesitantly.
"I wrote them all on the front page here. I think you should check them out. Just a meeting or two. You can learn how to have control again, because I'm fairly sure you're out of control right now." Hannah was about to say something, but then Josh walked back over and she looked down, ashamed. "See you, Hannah." Trish said, not hostile, but not implying she actually would.
When Trish returned to the counter, Dez was upset over the loss of his beloved yearbook. Trish argued that the only signature in it was Austin's. Dez still insisted it was special, but Trish didn't listen. She watched Hannah walk out of the store with Josh, and then stop to read the inside cover of the book.