"Reflect! Cure! Cure! Cure yourself, Lassie! Now REFLECT!" The disgruntled wizard hollered over and over and over again. Axel, still disabled from using his fire magic, had given up his composure moments earlier, savagely attacking one of the five giant ice crystals that had encircled them with all his might.
"Not the wisest choice, Lea." Merlin shook his head and folded his arms. The dissatisfaction was plain on his face today as it had been yesterday and the day before.
The clatter of steel on ice rang louder with each blow. The light blue glow emitting from the center of the crystal darkened and swelled, encompassing the entire orb and growing larger with each strike. Shards of shattered ice rained down everywhere as the orb spun faster. I must be faster. Kairi lept forward out of the center of the training field towards her classmate.
"Axel! Stop!" She screamed, encapsulating them in her barrier a moment too late. With one last frustrated strike the crystal burst, sending a blinding beam onto Axel. Kairi shielded her eyes and jumped out of the way. When she looked back his arm and keyblade coated in a thick layer of ice.
The crystal detonated a chain reaction, rapidly growing into the next one. A blistering freeze burned her skin as each crystal burst with ice and water. The water was worse. Kairi closed her eyes to the light and put up another barrier. If she could at least get her shield back up as soon as it faded, she could perhaps time it again to save herself from the onslaught of frozen knives. Unfortunately, her timing had never been good under pressure- which was always. She didn't try to block when one large cold hit finally paralyzed her joints. Kairi collapsed, effectively yielding.
Then the haze cleared and the violet summer sky opened up to her. Kairi stared up blankly, motionless as Merlin's advance cure spells coated her body in warmth.
"Reflect!" Merlin waved his hands in the air and hurried towards them frantically. "How many times do I have to tell the two of you? Whatever is the point of my being here?"
"That," groaned Axel, "is a good question." He flipped over onto his stomach and pushed himself from the ground. Kairi remained, staring at the sky, trying to figure out how exactly she ended up here.
"Now don't start getting wise with me, boy, I won't always be here to break the ice. Kairi dear, are you alright?" Kairi rose deadweight like at zombie, looked at Merlin and nodded. "Good." Merlin turned on his heels and began marching up the stone steps out of the courtyard. "Now wash up and come inside. Be happy these aren't real heartless, else likely you'd be dead thanks to Lea here. And work on your timing. And, for the love of all that is wizardly, reflect!"
I did- she thought as the master disappeared, quite literally, before the entrance of the manor. Kairi wondered how many years it had been since he'd last used a doorknob. She dropped her head back down onto the grass and felt blood rushing to her face.
She fought the urge to unabashedly sob, and not for the first time. Lea stopped in his tracks and Kairi held her breath. He waited a few seconds before continuing on.
Permitting the exhale, she pushed herself up, her arms still trembling, and carefully got to her fighting stance. She stood on a jagged patch of ice that led all the way to the house. She took two steps, her body aching and tennis shoes soaked, before slipping and falling back down on her stomach, her hands catching the wet ground as the ice abruptly melted into a puddle of cold water that rose up to meet her. She wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. What resulted was an odd combination of the two that manifested itself from the pit of her stomach.
"Hey! Easy there!" Axel shouted, splashing over in his combat boots. "Are you okay?" He asked, holding his hand out.
"Thank you." Kairi sniffled, letting Axel awkwardly pull her up by the elbow. "Yes, I'm fine."
"You need better shoes." Axel stood in front of her and scratched his head. His hair was drenched and clung to his face. "Sorry, that was my fault. He shouldn't have blamed it on you like that."
"No, it's alright." Kairi choked. "He's not bad, and he's right. My timing is still off, I've only successfully reflected anything once and it was an accident." She gave a half-truthful little laugh. "This is… this is all I've ever wanted. To be out here training to fight so I, I'm not..." she looked at her shoes sinking in the mud, "I should be happy." She pressed her cold hands into her hot cheekbones. "I don't know- when are you supposed to stop feeling like a failure?"
"Gee, I, uh.."
"I'm sorry. I'm being so silly. Forget I said anything." She turned away from her former abductor and started sloshing towards the mansion.
"Hey, I'm a failure too!" He called out from behind her. "I mean... I didn't mean that. You're not a failure. And you're not in over your head. The keyblade chose you right?" He took off his glove and wrapped an arm around her, rubbing her bare arm to give them warmth. Kairi stiffened before instinctively stepping away. Axel raised both hands over his head defensively.
"Sorry! Sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I won't touch you. I'm sorry."
"No, it's okay! I just- didn't see you there." She gave him a tiny, hesitant punch to the bicep then turned away and took a few heavy steps, finally arriving at the gate which thankfully swung open without prompting.
"Still scared of me, huh?" Merlin had usually cut in through any of this unwanted tension before too long. Kairi couldn't remember the last time she had been completely alone with him.
Oh right.
"It's okay. I'm scared of me sometimes too." Kairi had nothing more to add.
"Sit down, dear laddies. Do warm yourselves."
A blink of the eye and the Library was illuminated by a soft, golden hue. The fireplace Merlin had pulled out from his magic bag was positioned in the center of the room, providing the dusty, forgotten setting some much-needed warmth. Kairi approached the mantel and was immediately swept off her feet and into an old wooden chair with a red plaid cushion. A kindly blanket tapped her on the shoulder before taking its position snug around her shoulders. She looked to Axel, whose blanket was wrapped tightly around his face and gripped desperately over his chest. He seemed to be having a rougher time than she was shaking off the cold. His body was hunched towards the fire and his face was still red.
"Splendid jobs today! Both of you!" Kairi and Axel looked up in confusion. Master Merlin was a drill master by day, but by evening he was a jovial old bed and breakfast host, full of stories and compliments, but he had never brought up training in his more cheerful persona, much less complimented either of them on their skill.
"What do you mean? You completely wiped the floor with us!" Axel said.
"Precisely. I never expected either of you to be triumphant. Now you understand." Axel looked to Kairi for answers.
"We... do?" Asked Kairi.
"Here my dear, would you like a spot of tea?" He flicked his wrist and a full, proper tea set appeared before her, the teapot already pouring steaming tea into one of the two teacups.
"Yes! Thank you." As she reached to take the saucer, a bracelet materialized on her wrist. It was a plain silver band inlaid with three small stones; ruby, sapphire, and emerald.
"That will increase all your elemental defenses by about twenty percent, ehrm, give or take. Now you don't have to wear it, so long as you carry it with you, it should be helpful."
"What in the name of- well why didn't you give this to us before I almost died from hypothermia?" Axel exclaimed as he jumped from his seat, raising teacup and saucer in each hand. Kairi smiled, his black coat contrasted against the pink, floral porcelain.
"Because then you wouldn't have understood."
"Understood what?"
"If that bracelet had lessened the severity of the damage, you wouldn't have experienced first hand how it feels when all else fails."
"What do you mean?" Kairi interjected, put off by the assumption. "I know at least how it feels when the worst happens."
"Yes, but did you ever give up? Did you ever force yourself to accept defeat?"
"No! I.. I couldn't…"
"Precisely. Your determined spirit is a strong quality within your heart. Both of you." Merlin looked to Axel, who was still standing there holding his arms up. His brow furrowed deeper in confusion "But failure isn't something to be despised. Failure makes us grow and move forward. You mustn't be so anxious and afraid to fail. Now that you've faced a little slice of it, you will be better prepared for the multitude of unsuccessful endeavors that lie ahead."
"Fantastic!" said Axel with a dramatic flourish as he slumped back into his chair.
"You mock me, Lea, but in time I'm certain you'll come to understand what I mean."
"Is there something I missed? because…" Kairi interjected. She took a deep breath and tamed the anxiety in her voice. "With all due respect, Master, I didn't come here to fail."
"I didn't say you would continue to fail, I said you will fail. Not here, not necessarily, but throughout the entirety of your lives. You carry those lessons with you, improving upon your mistakes without letting them drag you down. Confidence, my dear. You shall have confidence. In fact, I already gave you the pathway. I cast a little of my magic on that bracelet there that will give you all the confidence you will need to succeed, so long as you also believe it within your heart."
Kairi held her hand up and examined the bracelet skeptically. "Did you really?" She asked flatly.
"Hmph." Axel sighed, sipping his tea. The handle on his cup was too small for his grip and his pinky lifted on its own accord.
"Well, why don't we test it out? Stand up." As he spoke, the chair levitated slightly and tilted downwards, placing Kairi firmly on her feet. The blanket danced away from her, taking her teacup and saucer with it. Her training clothes had dried completely. "Now, count. How long does your barrier stay up?"
Kairi summoned her keyblade and did as instructed. "1.. 2.. 3.. 4.." Her barrier faded.
"Now try again. Focus. Try to make it to five." Kairi put her barrier back up.
"1.. 2.. 3.. 4… 5!" Her barrier went down.
"Excellent work! Now do it again, and just as you get to five, put another one up." Kairi nodded and guarded herself once again. With a wave of his wrist, Merlin sent one of the many books from the surrounding shelves towards her at count four. She dropped her barrier and took it in the shoulder. Kairi let out a yelp, crumpling as she clutched her tingling arm at the elbow.
"It may surprise you that a barrier is actually meant to prevent that from happening." Said Merlin with a bit of mirth. He waved his wand and her shoulder pain melted away instantaneously. "Now- try again!"
She saw one coming in her peripheral and didn't take her focus off the barrier, getting the next up in the nick of time. The book deflected away from her and went soaring towards Axel's head. Kairi's hands flew to her mouth, but Axel, in turn, held up his palms defensively. The cup and saucer shattered on the floor and the book was set ablaze before dropping at his feet.
"How? What..?" Axel was incredulous.
"We did it!" Kairi clapped her hands and bounced on the balls of her feet gleefully.
"Indeed, you both trusted your instincts. Well done."
"But I thought you said I wouldn't be able to use my fire magic."
"I did say that, yes."
"So you're allowing me now? I can use fire?"
"My boy, I never did anything to inhibit your natural magic abilities. I simply told you the truth, which is that you wouldn't be able to use them. Not until you relearned them instinctually with the keyblade. You are always on the offensive. It's what you're accustomed to. But the keyblade is a mysterious weapon which requires balance. One cannot simply attack at all times."
"So.. you're saying my mind wasn't in the right place?" Said Axel.
"I'm saying your heart wasn't in the right place." Said the wizard. Axel summoned his keyblade and gazed at it with a newfound curiosity. Merlin beamed at him for a moment before his eyes filled sorrow. "I worry for you young key bearers and the weight that you must carry for the sake of the worlds." The wizard reclined into his chair with a spot of tea. "Master Yen Sid has expressed to me similar concerns, especially in regards to your friend, Sora."
"Sora?" That certainly stole all of her attention. "What do you mean?"
"Well, it's his heart, having been injured by the confrontation with Xehanort. And besides that, no doubt he carries an emotional burden having failed his exam and all. I just wish Yen Sid had..." the wizard trailed off, either out of self-censorship or distraction.
Her head was spinning from the influx of information. She silently begged the wizard for more.
"Yet the boy just smiles and sets off on yet another quest to bear the weight of all worlds. It's... it's much, too much, especially for a young lad."
Kairi hadn't seen Sora since he left for the tower. She had thought she would see him when Yen Sid summoned her, but her arrival and departure had been arranged while Sora was gone. She often found herself wondering if that was intentional on Yen Sid's part, or perhaps even Sora's.
"You didn't know any of that, did you?" Axel asked, the concern on his face matching her own. Kairi shook her head.
"Oh!" Merlin said. "Oh.. oh dear. I'm terribly sorry."
"No, please, don't be. I'm glad I know." All of the attention was on her now. "I better get to bed. It's been a long day."
"I understand, sleep well my dear, and don't lose heart! You're progressing wonderfully."
"Really?" Kairi asked. Master Merlin had never said any such thing to her. Her ears burned for the encouragement.
"Yes, really. You have excellent natural resources which you work hard on. Your barrier is as powerful as a full-fledged keyblade master, so long as you can stay focused and keep a handle over it."
"I don't know what to say. Thank you." Kairi beamed with enthusiasm.
"Hey! What about me?" Axel, never one to be ignored, waved his hands in the air emphatically as if he wasn't the most conspicuous man in the universe. "I didn't get the luxury of the pretty pink light shield!" Kairi rolled her eyes. Nothing was ever fair enough for Axel.
"You, Lea, will be able to practice your fire magic." Axel was about to speak, but Merlin wasn't done. "Only under my supervision and ONLY within designated trials. I'll need to protect this manor from stray flames. We must remember we are guests here."
Kairi left the door open behind her as she disappeared into the foyer.
"Say, Master, why are we guests here? Don't you have a house in Radiant Garden?" Kairi stopped and listened just out of their eye line.
"Yes, what of it?"
"Well, ya know, I'm from Radiant Garden, and so is Kairi, and so are you, so what are we doing here? I mean don't get me wrong, this town's nice and all, I have some rather fond memories, but it would be nice to talk to some people for a change. Real people, I mean."
"Yes, let's simply parade a pure light around in a world where one would expect to find her, keyblade in hand. Don't you remember what Master Yen Sid told you?"
"Yeah, yeah… protect the Princess first." Kairi balled her fists and bit her lip. Thoughts of frustration, helplessness, and guilt over the matter of her safety plagued her and followed her wherever she went. Her pride would have to take the hit, she knew, because she did need protection. Outside of her own life, there were the lives of billions to consider.
So what if she could only talk to two real people. Her and Axel would simply have to accept that. Unless, of course, Axel left.
Then it would just be her again.