***AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hey guys! I've been writing this fic for a while now, and I'm both nervous and excited to begin publishing it. This is actually my first time ever publishing a story online. With that being said, I am VERY open to constructive criticism and other words-of-wisdom. I really want to improve my writing and I'm using this fic (and my obsessive love for FF7/CloTi) to practice. Also, this story is supposed to be sort of canon. As in, I wanted to keep it mostly canon to the actual events in the FF7 compilation, but I sort of went off on my own tangent because I'm not completely familiar with the events of Dirge of Cerberus. With that being said, please take these "canon" events with a grain of salt, but also do please tell me if something seems off, such as dates/background information/other details like that. I also tried my best to keep everyone in character, so please let me know if anyone seems "off". I am always open to opinions on things that I can improve! One final note, I'm not sure how quickly I will upload, but I will attempt to make some sort of schedule. I'm thinking once every two weeks, sometime on the weekend. Alright, without further ado, here is the prologue to Tired Eyes and Aching Hearts!

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"Cloud…" Tifa's voice shook as she murmured his name, hardly louder than a whisper. "…Words aren't the only thing that tell people what you're thinking…."

Cloud was silent, his back still turned to her, hiding the crease forming between the furrow of his brows as surprise and confusion assaulted him. The culmination of strange feelings and unfamiliar emotions he had experienced throughout the past few months was building up to a climax, and he felt like he might burst open - from his head or his chest, he wasn't sure. With a moment of tightly closed eyes, still images of Tifa raced through Cloud's mind - images of her standing in the bar, smiling brightly with twinkling eyes. Images of her fighting off infantrymen, a scowl on her face that could scare the strongest of men. Images of her touching his arm gently and asking if he was alright, concern marring her pretty features. Images of her that Cloud wasn't even sure were real, of her calling out to him in the Lifestream… His body buzzed with electricity as he racked his brain for some sort of response.

What does she mean? If she doesn't want to hear what I'm trying to say, then what does she want?

Slowly, he turned back to look at her, his gaze finding hers as he instantly felt a wave of emotion crash through him. His face was set in stone as he took a step towards her, mentally willing the tears that had begun streaming down Tifa's cheeks to stop falling.

Tifa… Stop crying… Please stop crying…

He didn't know what to do, but found his body moving on its own accord, taking him closer to her with slow, deliberate steps. His brain was jumbled and his body was humming, and before he could process his own actions, he found himself reaching out to her, placing a calloused hand on her cheek, and thumbing away a tear that fell from her ruby-colored eye.

"Tifa…"

Their eyes locked on each other's, and Tifa's trembling lips and flushed cheeks begged for Cloud to do something. Something, something... but what? He found himself frozen in her gaze, and slowly, hesitantly, Tifa closed the gap between them, and time came to a standstill.

At first, Cloud didn't react. His body was frozen and his mind went blank. But then, feeling seeped back into him as he felt a warmth radiating from his core, out to his fingertips.

Tifa… Tifa is… Kissing… Tifa…

In that moment, something came over Cloud, something he had never felt before. He didn't need his mind now, or his words; he didn't need his thoughts. He just needed this feeling, this feeling of kissing her, of cupping his hand on her feminine cheek, of responding to her lips as they softly played at his own.

Everything shut down completely as his body took over any sort of rational thought process he may have had left. His hand snaked its way into her hair as his other arm wrapped tightly around her waist, pulling her body flush against his own as he passionately kissed her back. She returned the kiss with equal fervor, wrapping her arms around him tightly and even daring to jump and wrap her legs around his waist, breaking the kiss for only a moment. Quickly, Cloud moved an arm down to hold onto her thigh, keeping his other hand tangled in her flowing hair. It was almost ridiculous, the way they began desperately pawing at each other. Tifa, with her legs still tightly wrapped around Cloud's waist, was trying to push up as much of his shirt as she could, despite several pieces of armor getting in the way. Cloud didn't know what was happening anymore; he wasn't thinking, he was just reacting, and he decided that Tifa needed to have her shirt pushed up as well if his was going to be in the same condition. Hazy minds filled with fear and sorrow faded away as a new feeling took over. Somehow, without ever breaking contact, Cloud fell onto his knees and hovered over Tifa, kissing her until she was pinned under him with her back lying flat on the grass.

His lips finally released Tifa's as he propped himself up to drink in the sight of the beautiful woman. He wanted to see her expression, needed to see it, more than anything else in the world. He wanted to etch every detail of her face into his mind. The way her lips were plump and red now, the way her cheeks were flushed rouge, the way she heaved her chest breathily and looked up at him with misty eyes full of desire. Those deep, wine-colored eyes that spoke volumes when Tifa's words failed her, those eyes that could hold a man captive with their loving gaze. Those eyes were held by the most beautiful face of the most beautiful woman in the world; the face of the woman who had stayed by him through everything, through every battle, even through a time when Cloud didn't know who he was anymore. The face of the woman who helped him find himself, and whom he had loved for many years. The face of-

…Aerith?

Aerith was lying there in Tifa's place, with tears welled up in the emerald pools of her eyes. She looked up at Cloud meekly, her lips quivering. Her skin was paler than normal, almost so much that she looked ill. The primal, needy feelings that had taken over Cloud's fragile mind were swiftly replaced with utter confusion as he tried to make sense of what was happening.

Aerith? No… No, this isn't right. Tifa. Tifa is supposed to be here.

Cloud scrambled to get up, but found he was somehow already standing. The backdrop of the watercolored sunset faded away along with the hum of the Highwind's engine. In its wake, a blackness surrounded him, and there kneeled Aerith, with her hands clasped in prayer. An incredible fear washed over Cloud as the familiarity of the situation wiped away the pleasant feelings he had been experiencing only moments ago. He tried yelling to Aerith and moved to lunge forward, for he knew what was coming, but his lips uttered no sound and his body stood frozen. Aerith didn't move from her position, her face contorted in concentration, as Cloud desperately pleaded for his body to react.

With one smooth motion, a cloaked figure came soaring down from the sky, its silver blade piercing Aerith's body cleanly. Her body slumped forward as blood rushed from her mortal wound, and finally, Cloud was able to run forward to catch her as Sephiroth jumped away and escaped. He began to cry, shouting Aerith's name, willing her to look up at him and return to consciousness. But as he pulled her up and looked into her lifeless eyes, bright emerald was replaced with sparkling ruby. Tifa lay lifeless in his arms and Cloud lost all rational thought. He wailed her name as he clutched her limp body, blood still surging from her form. White noise replaced the sound of Cloud's voice as he laid Tifa's body down and began thrashing his sword about uselessly. The only word he could hear was 'Sephiroth' as he demanded the man to come back and show himself.

Suddenly, a figure appeared in the distance, the shadow of a human form cloaked in darkness. Cloud charged at the figure, ready to murder Sephiroth once and for all, but stopped dead in his tracks when the form became visible. Denzel, with Marlene hiding behind him, stood in horror as Cloud held his sword up dangerously. Another figure emerged from the darkness, wrapping her arms around both of the children protectively. Dumbfounded, Cloud looked back to where Tifa's body had lain, and saw that she was no longer there. He tried to calling to her, but no sound came out. The white noise was unbearable, and a searing pain abruptly shot through his head like a white-hot knife boring into his brain. Cloud dropped his sword and clutched at his cranium, dragging his fingers through his hair, willing the stinging and throbbing to stop. Blinded by the intensity of the excruciating pain, his body convulsed and the world dissolved away, leaving only the miserable torment in its wake. It seemed like it would never end, and existence would be solely comprised of the hurt forever, until finally, everything stopped. From complete nothingness emerged quiet, sardonic laughter.

"I could make you kill them, you know."

Cloud's chest heaved wearily as he tried to regain his composure. He was sure he had yelled something in response, but he couldn't hear it. He couldn't hear anything but the voice that was attacking his mind.

"You always were a puppet. What makes you think anything has changed?"

A… puppet? No… No, that's a lie. That's a lie!

"You're lying!" Cloud scrambled to his feet and spun around, searching desperately for the man, before another, different voice filled his head.

"Cloud…finish Sephiroth off…"

...Zack?

Cloud's head was swimming, his body turning frantically, looking for both the man he most hated, and the man he loved the most. Another blinding pain shot through his head, rendering him incapable of doing anything as he disgracefully fell back to his knees.

"…Pathetic."

Slowly, Cloud pulled himself to his feet once more, continuing the shameful dance of falling and climbing back up, but his body was moving forward of its own accord now. He felt his arms rise powerfully, poising the heavy Buster Sword high above his head, ready to come slicing down on Denzel and Marlene. Cloud thought he might have yelled 'no', but he still couldn't hear anything but Sephiroth's tortuous laughter, as Zack's voice had left him completely. He fought back, willing himself to stop moving forward, but his body kept going. Denzel and Marlene stood terrified and Tifa held her silent, unwavering position as Cloud's sword prepared to strike. He knew he was yelling a million things, but no words came out. He had to stop. He had to. With the last ounce of his strength and willpower, he brought the Buster Sword down, cleanly slicing into his own body.

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Cloud's eyes flew open and he sat up instinctually from his lying position on the sweat-drenched sheets. His body was tense, ready for battle, and it took a few moments of stiff and heavy breathing to slowly piece back the reality of his current situation.

Another dream?

It had been almost two months since he had defeated Sephiroth and his remnants, and nearly every night since then, the same nightmare had haunted his already uneasy sleep. Sometimes, little details would change, but it would always end the same way. Purposefully taking in several deep breaths, he tried to clear the images out of his mind.

I'm so tired of this…

Cloud's room was dark and quiet, but he could see everything with his Mako-enhaced eyes. He heard muffled shuffling in the room down the hall, and he was sure it wasn't coming from Denzel or Marlene.

She's awake again too…

As he suspected, quiet footsteps made their way towards his room, and a soft knock played at his door a few moments later.

"Come in, Tifa."

She would have come in anyway, even without his invitation. She already knew he was awake as well. The door cracked open slowly as Tifa quietly padded inside his room.

"You awake again, Cloud?" she whispered.

He nodded silently in response. She made her way over to his bed and gently settled herself on the edge of it.

"Did you have another bad dream?"

Cloud slowly leaned back, propping himself against the wall. His head was pounding.

"…Yeah."

Tifa looked down at her lap, fiddling with the Fenrir ring that Cloud had given her some time ago; she never took it off. "I had a bad dream again too…" She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and turned to meet his eyes, smiling gently. "You wanna talk about it?"

Cloud kept his eyes averted from hers. It was always the same dream, and as always, he didn't want to talk about it. He just wanted to erase it from his mind completely and forget it ever happened, even though he knew it would inevitably happen again the very next night.

"No, I'm fine. I'm just gonna try to fall back asleep before it's time to get up."

Tifa was still smiling at him gently, but there was another expression pulling at her features as well.

"Cloud… I'm worried about you."

He sighed quietly in return to her statement. She was always worried about him, and he was fed up with being the source of her worry. Tifa worried about everyone – the kids, Barrett, her bar patrons, Yuffie, Cid, Nanaki, Reeve, and even Vincent. She even worried about the Turks from time to time, but she worried about Cloud the most. It was obvious to him now, though it hadn't been in the past. He could tell by the barely-there, pained expression that would contort her face at times, and he could notice the nervous little habits she had formed. Was there anything he could do to make her relax? He would always say the same comforting things, like 'I'm fine' or 'Don't worry about me', but they never seemed to help. It was like Tifa could see right through him.

"Tifa, you know you don't have to worry about me. I'm fine. It was just a bad dream. Everyone has them."

Tifa didn't look convinced, but she still held the same gentle smile. She found Cloud's eyes and held his gaze for a moment, maybe a moment too long, because she flushed slightly and awkwardly looked away.

"It was a little different this time, Cloud… You were… Muttering."

Cloud's eyebrows raised slightly in surprise. Muttering? Muttering what, exactly?

"What are you talking about, Tifa?" Cloud had almost gotten used to waking up with tense muscles that were soaked in sweat, but he didn't think he had muttered during his sleep before… At least… Not since back then…

"Well… I was already awake, and I heard talking, so I checked on the kids and made sure they were asleep, and then I realized it was coming from your room… And you were kind of loud, so I could hear what you were saying…" She suddenly stopped talking and smiled brightly, as if nothing were wrong. "D-Don't worry, you didn't wake the kids or anything. It's really no big deal."

Cloud rubbed his eyes tiredly, looking back at Tifa and noticing that her fake smile was slowly turning into a frown.

"What did I say, Tifa?"

She looked down at her lap, resuming her nervous habit of twisting her ring.

"Um…" She sighed. "First you were saying you were going to kill someone, and you were cussing a lot. You said you were going to murder them, and you were going to… rip their insides out." She shook her head. "Then you just kept saying 'no', and you said, 'I can't kill them, I can't kill them', and that's when I noticed you started tossing and turning a lot, because the bed kept squeaking, and then you said..." She flinched, before looking back up to Cloud. "You said, 'I'll kill myself before I hurt my family'. You stopped after that, so I guess that was when you woke up…"

Cloud stared at her, dumbfounded, as visions from the nightmare flashed through his mind. He had been trying for the past two months to keep it to himself, always brushing Tifa off and asserting that he was fine, but now she knew. Or, at least, she knew part of it. He didn't know which was worse, the fact that she knew he had dreamt about trying to kill her and the children, and himself as well, or the idea of her discovering that his nightmare always began with the pleasant memory from that night under the Highwind. Cloud regained his composure and sat up straight, looking at Tifa with serious eyes.

"Tifa, no matter what dreams I have, I promise you that I would never hurt you or Marlene and Denzel." Cloud's eyes shone brightly with the severity of his statement, remnants of the Mako that tainted him surging throughout his irises. Tifa smiled gently in return.

"I know that, Cloud. Don't be silly… I'm just worried about you." Her pretty lips drooped downward again. "Everything that happened… That's all in the past now. You have to move on and live in the present. You can't let anything hold you back anymore."

Cloud averted his gaze again. "I'm trying," he uttered softly.

Tifa reached out and softly patted him on the arm, still smiling gently. "I know you are. Just… don't go off on your own again. You don't have to deal with your problems by yourself anymore." Tifa's tender expression revealed how honestly she meant those words.

"I know... I have you now, Teef. And the kids." Cloud gave her a wan smile. He did have her... sort of. "Try and get some sleep, ok?"

Tifa stood up slowly, looking down and studying Cloud's expression carefully. "Only if you do the same."

"Of course."

"Alright…" Tifa made her way over to the door quietly, pausing before opening it. "See you in the morning."

"'Night, Teef."

"Goodnight, Cloud."

She closed the door and crept back to her room, stopping by Marlene and Denzel's room to undoubtedly poke her head in and check on them again. Cloud was left to toss and turn for a while, trying his damndest to erase the nightmare from his head. The images were clear enough, but Sephiroth's voice rang through his mind like a wailing siren. It was so loud, just like he was in his head again… Every night, Cloud tried to convince himself that the nightmares were just that – nightmares. But he couldn't help but take heed to the uneasy feeling that had crawled it's way into his stomach and settled there ever since he had fought Sephiroth for the second time. You couldn't kill a man twice, and Cloud couldn't deny the strong similarities between the nightmares and what had actually happened to him just two years ago. He finally managed to quell his racing thoughts after an hour or so by ruminating over the beginning of his dream, rather than the end. At least that part was pleasant.

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1-16-17 Update: Did some grammar editing and added in a bit more detail/revisions.