Day 17! I can't believe it either.

Today is Valka/Hiccup/Astrid

Kinks are incest (obvs), public, dirty talk. Pregnancy, voyeurism, threesome-ish? And a complete disregard for reality. Seriously, don't take anything in this fic seriously.

This is like, ultimate in "I picked this cus I ship the fuck out of it, not because it makes any sense other than for smut". I don't think I've done these three properly (aside from Primal, ofc) since The Things We Do For Love!

Post HTTYD2.

-HTTYD-

The murmurs and mutters still ran rampant, but Hiccup ignored them. He had more important matters on his mind.

Like his mother, panting, twisting, moaning beneath him. Gods, she was glorious like that, hands above her head pinned beneath Astrid's knees, preventing Valka from touching Hiccup or herself, nothing for her to focus on but Hiccup inside her, biting her lip to quiet the sounds of pleasure she wanted to let out. But they had to wait. At least for now.

"Hiccup- son... please..."

Her pleading only made Hiccup want to draw it out further, to hear the merciless need in her voice. Gripping her thigh, he lifted it up against his chest, sliding deeper inside and Valka pitched, letting out a sound Astrid had to clamp a hand over her mouth to muffle.

"Shh! Nobody can overhear, remember?"

Strictly speaking, Hiccup wasn't supposed to touch her. Yet. Though he wondered what anybody thought he was claiming his mother for if they didn't already know it included explosive sex between the three of them. His main argument was that, as she was beyong child-bearing age and he was not in need of child-rearing by her, Hiccup was protecting his mother from being expected to wed again.

He reckoned nobody expected him to agree when they said he had to have sex with her to do it. But if he was going to be chief? Hiccup was damn well going to get something out of it, and breaking the rules here was what he wanted.

"So close- ah, please baby!"

Hiccup could barely hold himself back when she made those impassioned pleas, nodding to Astrid to cover his mothers mouth again. Valka protested initially, only to arch and moan against Astrid's hand when Hiccup fucked her harder, felt her seize and spasm around him before falling limp to the bed, still shaking and panting when Astrid lifted her hand. Joining his mother in the blissful realms of post-orgasm high, Hiccup felt his cock slip free of her as he leant over to kiss her, then Astrid. Oh, his wife.

Gorgeous, swollen with their baby, hair a tumbled golden curtain over one shoulder... and welcoming of Hiccup's mother in their bed. Hel, the two fucked each other when Hiccup was out chief-ing. And when he was there too, but it meant he knew they weren't just doing it for his sake. Leg twinging in protest of the awkward position he'd been in, Hiccup slumped gracelessly onto his backside, reaching first for Astrid's belly, then her face.

"What would milady like?"

Astrid didn't tolerate penetration especially well lately - not uncommon for her third stage of pregnancy, but Hiccup was quite adept at satisfying his wife in other ways and gave her the choice.

"On your back."

Hiccup laid down, shifting so his head and neck were supported by the pillow, creating a better angle for when Astrid straddled his face. One hand rested on her lower back, supporting Astrid's weight; the other went to her front, caressing her belly again. Hiccup confessed himself fascinated, drawn to the swell and would touch it as much as Astrid let him. Which, luckily, was quite a lot.

His tongue slipped out to taste his wife, familiar by now but addictive as ever. Astrid mewled happily, encouraging Hiccup to continue. It took little to have Astrid in a fit of fervent heat these days; the limitations didn't stop her wanting to be pleasured, and Hiccup was oh so very willing. Especially when he got to hear her all but sobbing in pleasure, riding his tongue like she couldn't get enough, like she couldn't bear Hiccup to stop for even a second.

"Don't stop babe, gods you feel good."

Hiccup relished every response, loved how Astrid became almost hedonistic in the heat of the moment, craving the high and fisting Hiccups hair, pulling his face tighter against her and cursing when his mouth suckled her clit, tongue tracing nonsense shapes in her wetness. He kept his pace, drank down Astrid's musky flavour and felt the gratifying tremors wrack her body as his work came to fruition, Astrid crying out in raptured bliss and twisting fingers so tight in his hair it was almost cruelly painful.

"Mmm. I love how good you are at that."

Astrid stretched, hands in front of her as she cracked her knuckles, shoulders and back all at once before carefully dismounting his face, turning until she could flop down and nuzzle in to Hiccup's side. It took little time for Valka to join them, long arm slung across Hiccup's narrow self to reach for Astrid's belly herself, equally fascinated by her own childs progeny developing. Truthfully, Hiccup couldn't imagine feeling for his own child what he felt for his mother, but then he reasoned that the situations were incredibly different - Hiccup wasn't going to be taken for two decades, come back and find an adult in their place.

He occasionally wondered what might have happened if they hadn't been apart so long, but Hiccup was so deliriously happy here and now, the two women he loved burrowing in close to him, that the will to change anything was effectively nonexistent.

"You guys nervous?"

Astrid asked, hand splayed over her bump.

"About?"

"Having to do the whole consumnation thing."

Hiccup shared a look with his mother, who shook her head.

"Not really. Nothing either of us haven't done before."

His wedding night to Astrid, Valka's to Stoick... Hiccup swallowed a lump in his throat. He dared not dwell on his father too much, lest questions of what he would think of what they were doing came to mind.

Not an easy ignorance when there was a massive statue of the man on Berk, but still.

They didn't say they were going to dress her up.

Hiccup had to fight not to visibly react to the sight of his mother, clad in that soft yellow gown that barely hid a thing. This was meant to be new and awkward and a little bit wrong to them. To her credit, Valka looked shy, a little uncertain, almost submissive in the way she'd not meet Hiccup's eye.

He approached her slowly, careful not to rush. Closer, with firelight casting the shadows, Hiccup spared a look around - attempting to look chiefly, checking all were present. In reality, he was looking for Astrid, who gave him her most reassuring smile as he took the next steps closer.

"Hey. Relax" Hiccup took her hand, pulled his mother close so she could hear his whisper "we're good at this."

The faint flush on her cheeks could be mistaken for embarrassment; Hiccup knew it was arousal. Bracing himself for the shocked gasps of those who didn't really expect him to go through with it, Hiccup leant in. They moved slow, lips barely brushing at first before neither could deny need for a firmer kiss. Sure enough, there were noises, but once fingers were stroking his neck and her tongue was in his mouth...

Hiccup didn't care.

Astrid had already taken him aside, biting his mouth as she pressed against him with wicked whispers of how he had better show his mother a good time. Who was Hiccup to argue with his wife?

Getting naked in front of everyone wasn't as big a deal as it had been last time - everyone had seen him, and Astrid had loudly informed them Hiccup's size was more than adequate post-consummation. His mother didn't shy away either, laying back on the furs laid out for them, pulling at the fastening of her gown to reveal her body to Hiccup. Even prepared, knowing what he'd see, Hiccup was still captivated by how beautiful she was. They both fumbled at his groin, as though checking Hiccup was able to complete the act - as though he would struggle to do this.

There was probably concern for Valka from the other women, thinking she'd be unaroused and uncomfortable at best. Hiccup knew different, could taste her arousal on the air so close. They kissed, fairly tame for the two, and then Hiccup was murmuring an apology that they ought to get this over with as he pressed inside her with little more preamble. Valka sucked in a sharp breath, fingers gripping at Hiccup's upper arms, a conscious effort he'd bet - his mother usually threw her arms around his neck and shoulders, crushed Hiccup to her chest.

But they needed to be novices here in front of everyone.

Hiccup's only option was to rely on his words instead of his body, the way they were entwined meaning he could murmur in her ear and nobody would really know any better.

"I bet everyone watching is jealous. Wishing they were in my place."

The sooner this was over, the sooner they could all go home and Hiccup could be with his mother and his wife properly. But that didn't mean he'd stint on his mothers pleasure, dropping a kiss to her neck as he thrust, trying not to look like he was so intimately familiar with the way his cock fit so perfectly inside his mother, that Valka didn't know exactly how to shift to get Hiccup pressing against all the right places.

"He's much smaller than Stoick."

"That might not be a bad thing."

Hiccup heard voices, ignored them and refocused on Valka. She was trying not to respond too much, he knew, and that only made it more fun to try and make her crack.

"You feel so good mom. I can't wait to take you home and have you again."

He changed his pace on an impulsive whim, thrusts now longer, slower, drawing out those seconds where they were pressed flush, where she clenched around Hiccup as though she desperately wanted to keep her son inside her. That thought affected him on a primal level, right there with the feel of her wetness coating his cock on each thrust. He knew it wouldn't happen, and Hiccup accepted it, but that didn't mean they weren't aroused by the thought...

"I wish I could put a baby in you. I'd love to know you walk around full of me in front of everyone, constantly."

Valka moaned, clamping her lips together to silence it, both moving slightly until Hiccup knew by the way her eyes went hazy that he he was pressing just right against that swollen little nub on each thrust. He wanted to use his hands, his mouth, squeeze her breast or suck at her nipple, but that could wait until nobody had eyes on them. Just because they got to watch this didn't mean they got to know exactly what his mother liked.

"Hiccup... don't..."

Her eyes were wide, muscles started to tighten on him and Hiccup knew she'd been trying not to climax in public, but there was only so much he could do about the intense heat between them if he was supposed to come himself to end this.

"Just hold on. Think of how much better it will be back home, Astrid and I both touching you, kissing you all over-" Hiccup felt ridiculous saying it in public, but nobody could really hear them and it was working "I'm gonna fuck you so many times you won't feel whole without me inside you."

Where did that come from? Hiccup scarcely had time to think about it before Valka was gone, arching hips pinned down by him and the fingers on his arms gripping tighter. She bit her lip to keep from crying out so loud, but the muffled whimpers probably still reached some of the audience. Hiccup didn't care, not with the slick, clenching muscles pulsing around his shaft, beckoning him to join her there in ecstasy. He let his head drop, breathing in her scent, potent on flushed skin as Hiccup felt his hips jerk, pumping a few more times before he spilled deep into her.

He wanted to kiss her properly, to bask in their soft, intimate post-coital connection, but more than that Hiccup wanted to take both she and Astrid home where they could be together properly. So he pecked one kiss on her lips, murmured "soon" against them and stood up, pulling up his trousers as she did her gown back up.

"Satisfied?"

Those who doubted he would really do it clearly were still stunned into silence. Hiccup pulled on his tunic, wrapping his heavy chiefs cloak around his mother to protect prying eyes - the show was over now. Astrid was fighting a beaming grin, but Hiccup could see her rosy cheeks were pinker than earlier, could see the heat in her eyes when he reached her on the way to their home. She fell into step with the mother-and-son, taking Hiccups hand with no notice taken of anyone else.

"You know, people will talk."

Astrid glanced back, shrugged and turned to beam at the two of them, hand on her rounded stomach.

"Let them."

-HTTYD-

And to nobodies great surprise I really love Valcup.