My eyes fluttered open when the sunlight hit my eyes. It was Saturday, a day to just relax, and not worry about school.

I got up and put my robe on. I walked over to my calendar to see what was planned for today, and the date from a couple of days back was circled.

I was supposed to start my period the a few days ago, but it never started. In fact, the period probably would have ended by now.

I sighed and laid on the bed.

Have you ever had that feeling that you just knew something that you couldn't prove? Or that feeling when you know you need to know the truth, but your too scared to be told what it is? That's how I felt.

A few weeks back, about a month or so, Eli had a break in his schedule at NYU. He was able to come and see his family and friends, and me of course. While he was here, we weren't totally safe. I don't know why. Maybe we just got caught up in the moment?

I don't know, it just happened, and now, I just know the worst has happened.

I'm pregnant.

I laid there for a while staring at my ceiling, when the familiar feeling of nausea hit.

This wasn't technically a sign of pregnancy for me though. After chemo, my body has been totally messed up, and I'm still on medication.

I sat there, hoping it would go away, but the feeling just got worst and worst, so I headed to the bathroom. I tried to hold it all down, but I couldn't.

Whether or not I just threw up because of chemo or because of a pregnancy, I was sick and tired of being worried and not being totally certain about what was going on with my body.

I got up, got dressed, got something to eat, and went to the store. I just prayed that I wouldn't get sick while shopping.

When I walked up to the aisle, I didn't really know what I wanted. I just wanted to know if I was pregnant. I got a popular brand that wasn't special, and headed home.

When I came back, everyone was still asleep. At this point, I was used to waking up early for school, but nobody else woke up as early as I did on a regular basis.

I slid into the bathroom and took the pregnancy test of the box. I read the instructions, and it was a good thing I didn't pee yet.

I carefully followed all the instructions, and I sat the pregnancy test out on the sink to, I don't know, set?

When you have three minutes to find out if your going to be a teen mom or not, you get to thinking about a lot of things.

How would my parents react? There so overly religious and anal, they would probably freak out, and might kick me out of the house. I hope they will be supportive of me.

How about Eli? How would he react? Will he be upset? Mad? Disappointed? Will he blame me? Will he come back from New York? If he comes back from New York, that means he has to give up his dreams of NYU. If he comes back here, then the closest school, besides a community college, is still an hour away. Will we have to move somewhere else? If so, where would I go to school to finish high school? Or would Eli stay in NYU and me and the baby move into an apartment with him? Studio apartment in New York are already so expensive, how much would a two bedroom cost?!

How can we afford a baby, or even a pregnancy? How was this all going to happen?

By the time I looked at my watch, it was already past the waiting time bi a few minutes.

I walked up to the sink and took a deep breath before grabbing the test, and bringing it to eye level.

There it was.

Proof.

That little extra line sealed the deal, and sealed my fate.

I'm going to be a mom.

How the hell am I going to tell that to my mom?

I walked out of the bathroom and sat on my bed with my pregnancy test still in my hand. I had already hid all the other things in the trash can so that no one would see it.

"Okay, so I'm pregnant," I said to myself.

"Now I need to tell everyone... I'll tell Eli soon, I'll talk to him and we'll decide when to tell our parents, probably within a few weeks, and once I start to show, I'll tell everyone else. But what if I don't show till later in the pregnancy? Okay, never mind, I'll tell them... when I'm three-months pregnant," I said quietly to myself.

I'm not sure how I'm going to tell them. It might not be fun... It might be. I don't know.

I'm also not sure about who I want as a doctor. Or do I want a midwife? What's the difference?

I don't know... I'm going to need help.

I pulled my computer into my lab and searched "pregnancy help newsletters". A website pulled up that I already knew about. I had used the site for advice many times before, I knew I could trust it. I signed up for an online newsletter that would send emails right to my inbox.

Hopefully it will cover all my questions.

I closed the computer and decided that I should at least see somebody to get some help.

I got my phone and called my OBGYN. I had her as my gynecologist for about a year now, and hopefully she will be useful and good as an obstetrician.

We set an appointment for next month, once I had missed a second period.

Once I hung up, I realized how depressed I was. One thing I didn't understand was, why?

Why was I so depressed about having my baby? There's nothing wrong with having a child. I always wanted to be a mom. It might not be how I wanted it to be, but there still should be no reason that I feel any shame in my baby. My baby didn't do anything wrong. In fact, its my job to be a good mom now, so that the baby is never in harm's way.

That's it! I was not going to be depressed or sad or upset or mad about this. Maybe it's weird for a teen girl to be happy that she is pregnant, but I was going to be. My life wasn't ruined because I was having a baby. What kind of person and mom would I be if I resented my baby?

As a matter of fact, I know exactly what to do... I'm going to tell Eli tonight! We have a Skype date planned, mom and Glenn have their own date night planned, and Jake will probably be up in his room, so why don't we have a nice dinner, to celebrate?

Perfect!

Waiting for 7:00 to roll around was no easy task. I had already texted Eli to order Chinese food. Being in New York, I knew it was impossible to Eli to have an excuse for not ordering Chinese food, plus we both LOVED Chinese food, even though we still argue whether rice or low mein was better.

I searched through the cabinets and through the fridge and found a bottle of sparkling cider. I giggled at how cheesy it was to have cider instead of champagne when your pregnant, but I realized we had champagne flutes in the cabinets. How would Eli react if he though I was getting drunk during our video date? It would be even better if I kept refilling my drink, and even drank from the bottle. I might have to pee a lot, but who cares, right?

I grabbed the champagne flute and sat it on the table.

"Is that champagne?" Jake asked. I hardly even noticed he standing by the stairs.

"Maybe," I said, but I couldn't keep a straight face.

Jake cocked his eyebrow.

"Fine, it's cider, but Eli won't know that when he sees it in this champagne flute," I said.

"Is Eli pressuring you to drink?" he asked.

"No, of course not! I just want to play a joke on him," I said.

"Are you sure, because when a guy pressures you, it can be subtle. He might try to get you drunk so you will take your top off while you're chatting online," Jake said.

I giggled at how innocent people think I am...

"Well, he wouldn't need to get me drunk to do that," I said honestly.

"Oh, Clare, I don't need to know about that," he said.

"Hey, you brought it up! Now go, he's trying to massage me," I said, walking to the front of the computer.

"Go to your room or something," I said.

"I'm going out with friends. I won't be back till tomorrow," he replied. He headed to the door.

"Wait, what about mom and dad?" I asked.

"They won't be back till tomorrow either, and they said it was fine," he said.

"One more question," I said.

"What?" he asked. I could tell he was getting annoyed.

"You have friends?" I said.

"Screw you," Jake said with a smirk on his face before leaving.

I went back to my date with Eli. I clicked accept on the video request and his face popped up.

"Hey sexy," he said.

"Hey yourself," I said.

"Wow, you look fancy," he said.

I was wearing a tight black dress, a black headband with a flower on it, and some basic jewelry.

"Well, I wanted to look good for our date," I said.

"Well now I feel like a slob," Eli replied.

"Oh quit it. You look great," I said.

"Thanks," he said.

There was short silence between us.

"I've waited all day to talk to you," I said.

"Really? Special occasion?" he asked.

"Yeah, actually," I said.

"What is the special occasion? I didn't forget anything, did I?" he asked.

"No, no you didn't," I said, giggling.

"Then what's up?" he asked.

"Well, before I tell you... I just... I want it to be a happy occasion. I want us to be happy about this," I said.

"Uh... okay," he said. He waited for me to tell him.

I had tried to get myself excited about this moment, about telling Eli, about celebrating the baby, but I honestly didn't know how he was going to react.

"I'm pregnant."

There. Like a Band-Aid.

"Wait, what?" he asked.

"I took a pregnancy test today. It's positive. We're having a baby," I said.

His face showed how stressed out he was.

"You want us to be happy about having a baby?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"H-how?" he asked.

"If we were 30 and married, we would be so happy. Why should it be any different?" I asked.

"I know. It's just, having a baby, costs a lot, and what about future?" he asked.

"We can still do everything we want. In fact, we should have more motivation now that were parents. Money might be tight, but we can make this work," I said.

"What about me being in New York?" he asked.

"Why are you making it such an unpleasant thing?" I asked.

"Because I have a lot of questions on my mind and... I don't know what to do," he said.

"I have a lot of questions too, and I don't know what I'm doing either, but, I'm not going to look down on this. I don't want to resent my baby. There's not reason too," I said.

Eli held his head in his hand.

"I didn't mean it that way," he said.

"I'm not mad or upset about having the baby, it's just... I don't know how to be a dad, or what to do, or anything," he said.

"We'll figure it out," I said.

He sighed.

"I'm sorry Clare. I know you want to be happy, and I do too," he said.

I tried to think of what do say at this moment, so I could make things better.

"Then let's be happy," I said.

We both finally smiled, and I leaned over to pour my glass of cider.

I started drinking it without even remembering that I was supposed to play a joke on Eli.

"Is that champagne?" Eli asked with a seriously confused look and I looked at my drink and busted out laughing.

"I totally forgot. I was going to let you believe this was champagne, but it's really cider," I explained.

"That's cruel!" Eli said.

"Why is it cruel?" I asked.

"Because you were going to let me believe you were harming our baby!" he said. I just smiled.

Eli grabbed his Chinese food.

"So have you told anyone else?" he asked.

"No, not yet," I said.

"I think we should wait till you a few months pregnant," he said.

"That's a good idea. My mom will think I'm sick because of the medicine, and I might be able to play off seeing my OBGYN," I said.

"I think we'll figure out how to tell them later," he said.

"Your right, we'll worry about it later," I said.

We had a great meal, and we talked details about the baby.

The next day, I headed over to the hospital. I signed up for an early pregnancy class. I had to drop some money on it, but I knew it would be worth it. I didn't want to go through this mindlessly. Another girl was there signing up.

"Are you signing up for the early pregnancy class?" she asked.

"Yeah, I guess I am," I replied.

I was still really anxious.

"You look pretty young," she said.

This coming from a girl who looked like she was in college.

"So do you," I said.

"19," she replied.

"17," I said.

"Wow, still in high school. I remember my senior year was awesome. Looks like your will be filled with baby," she said.

"That's a great way of looking at it," I said sarcastically.

"Susan," she said, holding her hand out. I shook it.

"Clare," I replied.

"Look for me at the classes," she said before leaving.

Humph. Well, okay then...

I also stopped by a book store to get some pregnancy, breastfeeding, and parenting books.

A constant theme reoccurring in the books was that I supposed to eat healthy, exercise, and all that. I had already started doing that because of the cancer. It talked about prenatal pills, so I figured I should go get some. I went to the store and got some prenatal vitamins.

When I came home, I took my vitamins and I got sick. I ate some food to calm my stomach, and after that, I got tired. I took a nap and calmed down.

This pregnancy is already taking a toll on me...

So, first chapter. I know this is really long. :P So, leave some suggestions in the reviews. Do you want it to be a boy or girl? Do you want it to be twins? Leave any other suggestions in the reviews!