Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha nor do I own the song 'Built for Sin' – both belong to either Rumiko Takahashi or Framing Hanley. In short, I don't own shit.
Warnings: If you're squeamish in any way, Leave.
Notes: This takes place in England, like the 18th century maybe? So when I mention the Queen, it's Queen Elizabeth. (I think...I'm going off of Kuroshitsuji here) Oh and the ages—Rin is sixteen and Sesshoumaru (physically) is nineteen. Also, my apologies for Sesshoumaru. It will all be explained at the end. Don't kill me. It's not as bad as it looks... *is totally going to get some major hate*
& a little author suggestion here; listening to the song 'Built For Sin' by Framing Hanley would really help set the mood. c: Atmosphere.
Built For Sin
There's a train leaving town
The high-pitched blow of a train horn made the young girl nearly jump out of her skin. She had finally stopped running to take a breath when it announced its departing. Trying to still keep her burning tears at bay, she gripped the leather handle of her suitcase tighter and dashed towards the intimidating doors in hopes to catch it.
If you hurry up, I think you just might make it
She had barely made it; the train lurched forward suddenly, as soon as she regained her footing, causing her to stumble a bit on unstable feet.
'Ahh…I made it…' Soft dark hair brushed away from her face as she ran a hand through the long tresses, letting out a much needed sigh of relief. 'I'm safe.'
She walked into the passenger compartment, taking a seat near a window where no one lingered. She didn't trust anyone; she wanted to be left alone to wallow in the dark depths of her mind to search for something more than what these humans had.
In her pocket was a single, crumpled up piece of parchment with the words that gave her new meaning. Her hand slipped inside her coat and her fingers curled around it, pulling it out silently.
Damn it, I hope you make it
Her unnaturally bright blue eyes scanned over the scribbled tangles of letters, being sure to memorize it and take everything to heart. How thankful she was for this flimsy piece of paper; it had indeed saved her life. She sent silent thoughts of gratitude to the friends who took the time to send this to her, though it could have destroyed them.
Your conscious is a feign on present sound
She was saved; she was going to be okay. At least that was she believed. She wouldn't think negative thoughts because they would lead to her destruction. It was already hard enough to keep the harsh, psychotic sobs down. She wanted more than anything to just scream her heart out without anyone hearing, she wanted to get rid of this weight on her chest.
You've worried enough, but here's your chance so take it
The scenery flew by on the metal mechanism, blurring and creating such beautiful pictures that she couldn't wait to get where she was going. She'd love to paint such things, get her mind off of everything and just work on art for once. She had lost such leisurely time…
Damn it, I hope you take it
The sun lowered slowly in the sky, casting orange shadows over the mountains and trees. The glow warmed her face and she temporarily forgot everything except for how beautiful this world was. Such a messed up, twisted, sadistic world. How could such a place hold such beauty?
A heart attack is sleeping in your chest
But that beauty disappeared along with the sun. Once the moon and stars came out it was their time to reign. And these thoughts, this darkness, it brought back the terrifying reality in her mind. It made her shy uncomfortably away from the window and bring her knees to her chest, no matter how unladylike it was.
She had almost reprimanded herself, but then she realized…who cares? Before all of this she had been a regular peasant under the Queen. She had been able to do these sorts of things without being judged or glared at disapprovingly. In fact, she had ditched the heavy lace cloths for one of her old dresses.
It was good that she finally got rid of it all; she had realized that that sort of lifestyle wasn't for her a long time ago, unconsciously at least.
'It's…a good riddance.' The dark-haired girl tried assuring herself, but as it turns out she had actually been more assured before she told herself. It had brought forth the familiar throbbing, choking feeling in her chest. She winced and hugged herself tighter, hoping it would just leave.
Waiting until the timing's best
Every time she had been alone, from the past three years to now, she had this lingering feeling within her chest. It was as if it were suffocating her, squeezing the life out of her. Ever since he had taken her out of her small and modest town, bringing her into a whole new life of mystery and wonder, giving her new friends with idealistic traits and thoughts, showering her with gifts and love, she had had this feeling of suffering.
If had never been as strong as this before. She knew that the time when it would overpower her and break her was coming soon. But…when?
Her eyes drooped tiredly. 'Might as well get some sleep…I don't have to be on my guard all the time. We're in the mountains right now, far, far away from him.'
So make a move while you're still breathing
The train suddenly lurched to a stop, throwing her and several other unsuspecting people out of the seats and sprawled out on the floor.
Jumping back to her feet, the girl ran to the window and frantically looked out with wide eyes. 'No…NO!'
The screams in her head were silenced once one of the train conductors walked into the apartment looking incredibly confused.
"Settle down, settle down!" He called out lazily but with authority as he waved both arms for people to calm down and stop talking.
Soon the worried whispers and cries were hushed as everyone stared at the man in charge. The atmosphere was tense and eerie, as though something were to jump out of nowhere at any given moment and cause destruction.
"It appears that we have a little stowaway here." His voice ringed into the blue-eyed girl's head; it was the only thing echoing in her mind as the horror gripped her heart. She knew who the stowaway was, and she knew exactly how they had found out about it.
"…but don't worry," The conductor continued on with his speech once Rin tuned back in. "They sent someone to fetch her for everyone, so please calm down and exit the train in an orderly fashion an—"
"Oh, there's no need for that." A cool and sharp voice interrupted the conductor smoothly, violent amusement clear through its tone.
Gasps were heard through the crowd as the owner of the voice walked in, but the girl with the blue eyes couldn't even process it; she was too busy trying not to hyperventilate and just have a heart attack on the spot. She stepped back slowly and pressed her back up against the window.
The man had long silver hair neatly tied up in a ponytail (despite the fact that he was rather young), clothes that were fit for noble, and terrifying blood red eyes that seemed to be glowing. It was the red eyes that scared Rin the most, the ones that used to be such a soft and beautiful golden color.
The man turned his head and looked right at her predatorily. "Rin…"
Say so long to innocence
The color in Rin's face slowly drained as she tried swallowing the thick lump in her throat. She couldn't move, she couldn't think. How had he found her already..?
"Come here, Rin." He ordered smoothly, a torturous smile spreading across his perfect lips, showing pure white, razor-sharp canine teeth.
How had the man from before, the gentle and stoic one with golden eyes…turned into this? He had never showed so much emotion at once. It honestly scared her more to death than the thoughts of what would happen when he caught her.
Cautiously and submissively, Rin walked forward with her eyes trained on the ground for several reasons. Her hand found its way to her pocket and she brushed her fingertips across the parchment lightly, feeling like something inside her was swallowing her whole, inside-out.
Once she stopped at the edge of the walkway, he moved his arm to guide her the way out in front of him. She walked slowly a few steps before doing something so terrible, so completely awful, that she would surely go to hell because of it.
Her fingers has reached the smooth handle underneath the parchment and quickly slid out the dagger her brother had given her before she left. She stuck it into the man's stomach, pushing it in as hard as she could. Adrenaline pumped through her veins and at the sound of his sharp gasp, she turned heel and fled the other way in fear.
A faint 'tsk' was heard from the man; it wasn't in pain or agony though, it was as if it were a simple annoyance made by a childish teenager.
Hopefully that would stall him enough…her hands were shaking and a few drops of blood littered them, reminding her of the sin she had committed.
From underneath the other tense
People moved out of her way quickly in fear of being stabbed too, screaming in horror at the sight of the Lord Sesshoumaru being stabbed by a mere peasant girl. But that was a good thing for Rin because it helped her escape quicker.
She fully knew that she could never outrun him in a million years, even if he was injured with a wound that could kill a human. But he was very much the opposite of a human, as opposite as Heaven and Hell were. But it couldn't hurt to try; she wasn't going down without a fight.
Rin finally made it to the other end and yanked the door open with all her might, stepping out and slamming it shut behind her forcefully. The train wasn't moving so she got ready to jump off and sprint when…
"I believe I've taught you much better manners than that."
Rin cried out in surprised, stumbling back into the door. She looked up to the top of the next compartment to see glowing red eyes narrowing at her. She couldn't make out his features besides the eyes because the moon was set behind him eerily, showing his form but just that.
She could feel the smirk, though…she knew it was there.
"I-I…Ah!" Rin cried out again as Sesshoumaru dropped down in front of her so fast her hair swung back from force. He made sure to be close. She felt his ice-cold breath kissing her face as his amusement disappeared and a glare formed.
You taste like Heaven
She felt dread for something she somehow knew would happen, just by the look in his eyes. And not a second later, their lips met in a flurry of emotions.
Rin tried to pull away, her tears finally breaking free from her checked hold on them and streaming wildly down her cheeks. They felt like they were burning through her skin, but it was nothing compared to the burning feeling of Sesshoumaru's lips on hers, trying to coax her to open her mouth.
He wasn't doing this out of love; it was a selfish reason and she would never give in. She knew everything. The letter from her noble friends, the one that warned her to get away and leave, the one that told her what the Lord's true intentions were, was utter proof of it.
He pried her mouth open finally with his tongue and in fear Rin bit down in it hard enough to draw blood. Snarls were heard as he pulled back and slapped her across the face, but it was enough to give her the chance to break free.
Holding her throbbing cheek with one hand, the peasant girl jumped off the train and began sprinting, feeling disoriented. He caught up within seconds, though, now facing in the direction of the brightly lit moon so she could see all of his features.
The anger was gone and back was the sadistic smile that screamed 'torture' and 'murder'. She ran into him again and while stumbling back was slapped across the other cheek hard enough to fall to the ground and slide several feet back.
But God knows you're built for sin
Pain was throbbing in both cheeks, as well as her neck from snapping to the side so quickly; it was a miracle her head didn't fly off, but he wouldn't want that now would he? He needed her body, because without it these ministrations would be pointless.
The irony taste of blood seeped from her cheeks in the inside of her mouth from where she had accidently bit and ripped the skin.
"It appears that a little birdie, or quite a few, has leaked to you my intentions." Sesshoumaru taunted, walking over to her spot on the ground in a slow and predator-like pace.
Rin spit blood out of her mouth but the bleeding in her cheeks kept flowing. Her head was pulsing with white-hot pain and her neck protested angrily when she tried to move it straight again, but the pain from her neck-up was nothing compared to the amount of fear she had held in her.
With a quick glance she saw the people from her compartment pressing up against the windows to watch in terror at the monstrosity happening before them. Either their memories would be wiped or they would die—but seeing Sesshoumaru in such a devilish way, she was betting on their murder.
Sesshoumaru finally kneeled before her, grabbing her chin with his long, cool fingers and yanking her head to face him. A distinct cracking noise made her cry out in pain as well as the fresh wave of throbbing in her head, but he had made sure to not break anything.
You're built for sin.
He was handsome—most definitely so. There was no doubt about it. Even with such bright red eyes, he has easily the most handsome man she had ever come across. And in the end, it would be the last thing she'd ever see in her current mindset—or as who she was, right then and before then.
His fingers gently squeezed as he brought his face closer to hers, smiling cruelly with great amusement.
"This is for my best interests." He drawled, reaching into her coat pocket and pulling out the crumbled piece and parchment. He examined it with disinterest for a moment before tossing it to the side. "I'll deal with that and them later."
…You're built for sin…
"Se…Sessho—"
"Silence." He hissed, snapping his eyes back to hers with such intensity she cringed and lost her voice from fear. "You insolent little girl, how dare you show such disrespect when I was the one who saved your life?"
Rin couldn't answer, partly because of his hold on her face tightening again, but also from fear. 'You're also the one ending it…' She thought sadly.
Using his free hand, his smirk quirked his face again as he lazily reached into his back pocket and pulled out an intricate-looking dagger.
"Please…" Rin's pleads were completely futile, but she hoped to reach even just a little inside him. His hard look back gave her the answer.
He forced her to the ground, laying her out perfectly. Using the dagger he drew a circle around her body. She made no move to escape, it was too late. Her heart was pounding in anticipation as he brought the dagger to the center of her chest, slicing her just a little bit to form a thin cut.
You're Built For Sin
The pain was nothing to Rin; it stung like it should, but it was the horrific thoughts of what he was about to attempt. Forbidden curses, magic, ancient Japanese remedies. Just how much had the event so many years ago warp his mind?
But her thoughts were interrupted as he tilted a tiny hidden flask forward. A bead of dark red dropped onto her cut, and as her body sucked it inside, the real pain began.
You can scream out loud
It was the pain of feeling your soul get sucked out of your body. The very same soul he wanted. It was in his grasp now; she was at his mercy so he could conduct whatever experiments he wanted on her.
Her ear-splitting screams could be heard for miles as he held her down, flicking a silver power on her. Her cut soaked that up as well. It was like metal shavings were running rampant through her bloodstream; they balled together and a searing pain at her chest caused her eyes to nearly roll to the back of her head.
But your panic falls on deaf ears
The passengers on the train didn't even flinch as they watched; in fact, whatever Lord Sesshoumaru was doing was most fit. She had attempted to murder him; she, a mere peasant girl! She outright deserved what was happening to her. It was for their protection and for his protection.
They watched on, some of the men even chuckling at her obvious agony. A few women sat back down, shaking their heads and resuming their knitting or reading, forcing the children away. But most still watched, anticipating for what would happen in the end.
They watched as Lord Sesshoumaru placed the tip of his sharp nail on the cut he made and begin to draw something out, something glowing and fluttery, very slowly.
This is what you brought yourself
That silly little girl clad in orange and prancing around barefoot through fields of flowers all those years ago, the one who eventually grew up with the elegance of a true demoness complete with the right humor and knowledge, the one who drew herself madder every year she got older because mating doesn't stop aging, the one who submersed herself with the knowledge of witchcraft and ancient magic until she grew sick…he had promise her to find out the safest way to bring her back permanently on her death bed.
And he found a way. It was the only way that could guarantee no soul-splitting or damnation. And he was ever so excited when he came across the reincarnation of his beloved Rin; a mature, quiet child who constantly smiled through everything. She was certainly much stronger mentally and emotionally than his mate, but would she ever hold the same memories and forgiveness his Rin did? No. Which was why he was doing what he was doing.
Her shrieks increased as her soul was pulled out more from his fingertips; it was almost time to conduct the final part of the ceremony. It was finally almost time to get his Rin back.
This is what you always feared
The beautiful paintings of Rin's life flashed by her wet eyelids, causing a build-up of emotions make her body tremble from its force. All her regrets, all her pain, love, happiness, sadness, everything up until then was being lived a second and final time.
She lived the part of her life when her parents died in a house fire that she and her siblings escaped. She escaped the wrath of many demons and witches, protecting her brother through it all. She moved to her aunt's house in a different town, closer to the castle. She met Sesshoumaru one day in town and was brought to the palace to live there.
All the love her gave her, all the friendship…everything had seemed off from the beginning. She had always known a day like this would come; the end of them. The end of the couple that had struck England by surprise.
This was what she had been afraid of; this was what she had never wanted.
There's a faceless crowd
With no sympathy
The pain was searing in her chest, but the rest of her felt dead. Her body was slowly shutting itself down and her memories were running out fast. The light her soul gave off was blinding. But the only thing she could think of was how much the betrayal hurt.
It was ironic; the only person who had ever cared for her that much betraying her in the end. She had gone through endless pain and torture in her past. This was the way it had to end?
The people on the train shielded their eyes from the light as well, but their nervous laughter kept up. It was strange what their lord was doing to her, but she deserved it. Even if every single one of them silently agreed it was the worst and most tortured sound they had ever heard in their lives.
So you can scream out loud
It was the final seconds of her life and her memories were gone. She couldn't hear anything, feel anything…she wasn't sure if she was screaming anymore but she was damn sure she wanted to. She saw the random flashes in Sesshoumaru's eyes; she knew he hated the noise. Let him hear it, let it haunt him for the rest of his life.
Her fear was strong, but she had given up. It was like she was watching life through someone else's eyes; like she wasn't there physically but mentally. No more memories or feelings were left. All she could think about was 'You betrayed me'.
And then her soul exited her body.
But there's no one listening
Smiling in triumph at the soul in his hands, Sesshoumaru reached in his pocket to bring out a tiny flask of blood; the past Rin's blood. The present one had already escaped his mind, he had already forgotten about her.
Just a few drops would do it. Tilting the flask forward, he watched as a couple dark red drops flew into the soul and dissolved. He wasn't sure how this exactly worked, but he had a certain ally who told him it would.
And then he pressed the soul back into her chest, watching with wide eyes as the cut and the rest of the bruises and damage he had given her disappear.
Say so long to innocence
The new Rin disappeared in a forgotten flash as the old Rin moved in. She slowly awakened as the past filled her new mind.
Nothing had changed except her appearance and age; her mind was still corrupt with silly thoughts of magic and witchcraft. The insanity that developed over the years, the one that had saddened everyone in the Western lands, the one that had made Lord Sesshoumaru and Master Jaken send her pitiful looks when they passed, was still there.
Her obsession and undying thirst for life was still there. As her love for Sesshoumaru was as well. This was all for him; her insanity was worth his love.
From underneath the other tense
The memories of her family's death and her first two deaths were lived through again. The memories of her savior always taking care of her, coming back for her when she turned eighteen, mating with years after that. She had always loved him. When was she denied the life she wanted, she had been devastated. Why wasn't her love strong enough to help them be together forever? That's all she ever wanted. She was incredibly selfish and childish from being pampered since she was eight; she would find a way to stay, even if it killed her in the process.
She would always come back.
You taste like Heaven
When she was young, Rin had always been one of the most delightful people anyone had ever met. She was as sweet as could be; strong in her heart, cheery and hopeful, optimistic…she was the exact opposite of Lord Sesshoumaru. She understood him like no other, and with a few years of persistence he had fallen for her. She had studied hard to make him proud, trained, and developed refined elegance that would make him proud.
Why didn't it ever work?
But God knows you're built for sin
She had begged him to do what he had done. He didn't want to harm her soul. He wanted to wait and love all of her reincarnations, but Rin would have none of it. She wanted to be the same person, understand him the same way she did now. He would be incredibly lonely if she was gone; she knew everything about him so she knew this had been true.
Sesshoumaru watched as the color returned in her cheeks, watching as her breathing evened out again. He was so anxious it hurt; had this experiment worked? Would he have his Rin back?
You're built for sin…you're built for sin…
Rin stirred, and finally her eyes opened. The entrancing bright blue depths were gone, replaced by a muddy chocolate color. The girl sat up, blinking a few times in disorientation.
Then she smiled slowly, letting it build up to a smile that stretched from ear-to-ear. It was a smile that was once filled with innocence and happiness; the same innocence and happiness that reflected in it now like a shadow. The one now was slightly insane.
She was even more naïve than her reincarnation was; she didn't realize how much pain her lord had gone through to bring her back from the dead. This wasn't the past, and the one fact that escaped her stood; she wasn't fit to understand him anymore. Not with her current state of mind, not with his new lifestyle.
But…in the end, none of that mattered. Not to her, anyways. He would always be seeking more and she would be right by his side for eternity. Nothing would stop her now.
So, taking a quick breath, she prepared herself for the first thing she would say in centuries.
"You did it, my lord! You brought me back!"
You're built for sin.
A/N: Oh god what did I even write. /headdesk I'm sorry for any confusion or fast-paced parts. This entire idea was crazy. Ahh...and yeah I didn't make whatever method that shit was up...just sayin'. I thought it was a little silly, but it fit the lyrics better than anything else so why not! I've been reading too much Kuroshitsuji LOL. And Pandora Hearts…that's probably where I got the insanity idea from. My fandoms, guys! They must mix. Anyways…this was kind of made to get my inspiration back for LWWCT. I don't even know what to write for it anymore, even though I have everything planned out for it.
And if some of you hate me for what I did in this story, I'm not really that sorry. I don't particularly like happy endings. I mean, I do, it's just every single damn story for Rin/Sesshoumaru is so…fluffy and…ack, happy. I can't stand it, I need angst and tragedy. So I'm kind of wary to post this. Anyways, any questions; ask away! I understand if you feel confused. It was meant to be a little mindfuck. If you want me to get back fast, shooting me an ask on Tumblr is always the best way to reach me. (I basically live there) It also works to remind my ass to finish a chapter or update. Go to: yukiriin [dot] tumblr [dot] com
Review to tell me your thoughts? I won't make it required, but I'm really curious on what you guys think. Should I continue this and make it a full fic starting from the beginning or just leave it be? Until next time, my toilets! :D (Youko x Boku SS reference LOL)