He wakes with a start to the howling wind outside the window and rolls over, pulling the covers over his head in a desperate attempt to block the noise out. It's when he turns to face the other way that his ears register another sound, chattering teeth. His wife's chattering teeth.
She had woken a few minutes earlier and had briefly contemplated snuggling up next to Robert but she had quickly dismissed the idea, unsure that her present marital situation would allow such intimate activities. It would cause far too many awkward looks and questions in the morning. So instead she had let her teeth chatter and her mind wander over all the things that had happened over the past few weeks. Did Robert still love her? Still need her? And as for Bricker she was in some ways pleased that Robert had hit him, he'd taken it one step too far coming to her bedroom the other night.
"Cora?" He tentatively speaks her name not wanting to distress her. But her can't, he absolutely can't let her lie there freezing. "Come and lie in my arms to warm up." She doesn't move and he almost moves towards her but his subconscious stops him. Somehow he knows that being forward with her will give the wrong impression, it would insinuate he wants to hold her body and perhaps take advantage of her, he doesn't want to do that because they've hardly been on the best terms recently. He's blamed Bricker for the whole situation but he's not oblivious to the fact that it takes two people to make a marriage work, and it takes two people to ruin one. He's been doing something wrong, something to make Cora feel insecure in herself and unwanted by him. My goodness he wants her, not just as a possession but as his wife, the wonderful Cora that stands by his side and listens and loves him no matter what. But that is the Cora he hasn't seen in a while, that is the Cora he's determined to get back.
She hesitates, is it really a good idea to let herself be enveloped in his arms like the old days, to feel his breath on the back of her neck and the rise and fall of his chest against her back? She'd be gone, taken in, ready to give him everything before he's so much as uttered a word let alone apologised for his neglect. She pauses in her thoughts unwilling to go on without first remembering that it take two people to make a marriage work, therefore it takes two people to ruin one. She is the second person and it's not just his neglect that's lead to their present rather tattered understanding. She has a part to play too; Bricker and his casual yet spellbinding flattery accompanied with looks that she used to receive from Robert but no longer does. She knows she had been tempted by the worst kind of man, the kind of man that uses a woman only for his pleasure and then disposes of her soon after. A man that simpers and smirks until he gets what he wants. She'd been stupid to let his attentions continue but then she'd known that from the very beginning. She'd ended it the night after their dinner in London only to come home to a fuming Robert who made her feel a million times more neglected and like his possession than she already felt. She'd pretended not to understand his meaning about Bricker not really wanting to talk about art, she knew Robert meant he wanted to gaze at her but she'd refused to admit it, instead seeing the harshness of Robert's words, the underlying theme of her intelligence, or lack of.
"It's alright, I'll warm up soon enough." Her words pierce his heart, it appears she doesn't want to fix their marriage, just when he was beginning to realise what she wants. His love. That's what she wants, she wants him to flirt with her and flatter her as Bricker did. She wants to lie in his arms at night and fall asleep to him whispering sweet nothing's in her ear, his lips against her neck. She wants him to set aside a few hours of each day to spend with her and her alone. She wants to go on holiday with him, just him. She also wants something to do on the estate, he realises now she doesn't question him about the running of the estate because she's worried about the finances but because she wants to know, she wants something to talk about together, something to offer her opinions on. Her opinions, always valued to him, always, but she doesn't think so, not now anyway.
"Cora, please, you'll freeze. I won't take advantage of you if that's what's worrying you. I just want to make sure you're alright. You are my wife and I promised your father I'd take good care of you. If he knew I was letting you lie less than an arm's length away from me shivering he'd hunt me down." She smiles, a laugh bubbles in her throat but she keeps it down. No way is she going to pretend her resistance is breaking, he has to apologise, at the very least say he still loves her, if he does that is, before she lets her walls down.
"Only if you promise not to place your hands any higher than my waist." The words tumble from her mouth before she thinks them through and she immediately regrets them, it's not her place to tell him what to do, it was she who promised to obey him after all. "Sorry, that was silly I-"
"It's alright. I understand. But I promise I won't take advantage of you. As much as our society is fairly patriarchy I believe women should have rights, and I certainly think they have every right to refuse a man's advances and be listened to. Now, come here before your fingers drop off." In truth her comment hurt, it proved just how far their marriage had fallen, to the point she didn't totally trust him anymore. She shuffles over to him and lies her back against his chest, his arms envelope her waist. He gulps as her hair brushes under his nose and her familiar washing products wash over his senses. As his hands slide effortlessly around her waist he tries to remember the last time he held her like this, the last time he showed his love in such a simple gesture. He can't. He wraps his arms tighter around her waist. "Cora darling, put your hands in mine so we can warm your fingers up."
Her breath catches, did he just say "darling?" She doesn't know, she can't remember. Whether he did or not didn't really matter. She was too busy trying to distract herself from the very pleasant feeling of his chest, she can feel his muscles on her back as well as his heartbeat. His breathing on her neck is the hardest thing to block out though, it's so repetitive and an aching reminder of times gone by when she would fall asleep with his breath on her neck, his arms wrapped around her naked form. The muscular arms that she loves so much wrapped so snugly around her waist only manage to continue to remind her of times gone by, times that she so desperately wants back. Bricker doesn't matter, he never has, it's Robert that matters. She'd known that when she had written inviting him for the dinner the week before, pretending she wanted him to come to look at more paintings or at least that was what she told herself. But the real reason was to make Robert jealous and to see if he would finally wake up and quit taking her for granted. What she hadn't expected was for Bricker to stay a further few nights, so much so that the time had arisen for him to try his next move on her. She'd never forget how he'd come to her room and attempted to seduce her. In goodness knows how many weeks she had never been so happy to see Robert's fuming face as he walked in to save her from something she was not only unable to stop but that she would regret until the day she died. No doubt similar thoughts had been circling in Robert's mind when he had mentioned women's rights a moment earlier.
"My god, my darling, your fingers are like icicles. Why didn't you wake me or at least move closer when you woke up this cold?" He regrets these words seconds after they leave his mouth, she didn't think she could, is the truth of the matter. "Sorry, ignore that, I hadn't thought that through. Are you feeling warmer?" He accompanies his apology, the first of many this evening he decides, with a kiss to the spot just below her ear. A kiss he doesn't think through, a kiss based on pure habit. He doesn't realise his mistake until a mini growl erupts from her throat.
"Robert, you promised not to take advantage of me." In truth, she felt positively naked now his lips had left her skin after leaving the most tingling sensation on the favourite place on her neck. "As to your other question, yes I am much warmer, thank you."
"I'm pleased I could be of service." That's not what he wants to say, he doesn't want to be of service to her, he wants to be the first person she thinks of when she has a problem, the only person she trusts enough to tell her secrets to. He wants to be her only one. "Cora-"
"Not now Robert, please." But he's heard that one before, every time they put it off it only makes the grudge greater, it's like giving a fire more oxygen, it only makes it burn harder.
"Yes Cora, now. We need to sort this out. I've neglected you and for that I'm more sorry than I can possibly express. I guess everything with the new government, and the worry about Tom leaving and Mary remarrying and moving somewhere else has taken its toll. And then there's Edith, I mean who know what's happening with her. In the mist of all that I forgot about where my loyalties lie Cora, they lie with you. They have since the moment I said 'I do'. I love you. I'll always love you. I just fail to remember that sometimes. I fail to remember what you deserve." Tears slip silently down her face onto the pillow and in the dim light of the moon he catches them with his finger and tastes them as he did the first night she cried in his arms. They're still as sweet, still as perfect as they always were, but then, so is she he thinks. "You're beautiful Cora, you're wonderful and beautiful and I couldn't ask for a better, more perfect wife."
She shakes against him, tears streaming like rivers down her face, she turns her head a little to look into his eyes and she sees love, she sees the love she's been longing for. But she can't give in just yet, she has to tell him she's sorry too. She gulps a few times to steady her tears.
"Darling, I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have led Bricker on like that. I knew what he was. I knew he was only being how he was because he wanted, well you know. It's just he noticed me at a time I wasn't being noticed by anyone, not even you. I'm used to being overlooked but the others, but by you darling, that really hurt. I only ask that you tell me about all the estate things. They do say that a problem shared is a problem halved, well I'm your other half, here to share your problems. I love you too, darling. So much." He kisses the top of her head.
"How about tomorrow you come with Tom, Mary and I too look at the new housing plans? And then I think we should go to London for a few nights, just the two of us, and I can spoil you as you deserve to be spoiled. Does that sound alright?"
"Yes, darling, perfect. I do have one problem at this moment though." Robert detects the teasing note in her voice and can't help but smile, she's coming back. His Cora is making a return.
"Pray tell, what is the problem?"
"My lips are still cold." She rolls over so her chest lies against his and puts her hands onto his chest, her fingers absentmindedly tracing his torso through his shirt.
"Your lips you say? I think I know a way to solve that. But first I think I should tell you that this time next year you will not be waking up cold in bed because I have just decided I think we should spend our anniversary abroad, what do you think? I thought perhaps Venice?" Tears spring to her eyes again and she twirls her hands into his hair in a desperate attempt to bring his lips to hers but he resists. "Well, Cora, what do you say?"
"Yes, yes, a million times yes. Now kiss me, my lips are going blue." He wishes to tell her they're not blue yet, in actual fact they are the rosiest pink but he doesn't, instead he kisses her, like he's never kissed her before.