I can't help but be amazed by the pretty little blonde next to me. She smells like cinnamon and pine needles and I can't help but lean a little to my left so that I'm closer towards her. She's probably from Port Angeles, because I've never seen her in Forks and she definitely doesn't live on the Res. There aren't any blondes on the Res, if there was I probably would have already found them anyways.
She sighs audibly and I glance at her, she leans to her left a little bit and then to her right, trying to see around the guy that had just sat down in front of her. She sighs again and looks around the classroom, the only other open seat is a few rows away from me and I don't want her to move that far away. I had to at least talk to her a little bit.
"You want to switch me spots?" I ask her and she looks at me, her wide blue eyes meeting my brown ones and I feel absolutely nothing. Well I do feel the butterflies that erupt in my stomach when she looks at me, but I don't feel anything else. I didn't imprint on her and I feel the anger bubble inside me. It was bad enough that practically the idea packed imprinted but it seemed like I couldn't imprint at all.
"Are you sure?" She questions and I stand up, her eyes widen as she takes in my six foot frame and I nod.
"I'm sure." She gets up, her cheeks tingeing a pinkish color as we awakwardly shuffle around each other. She's very petite compared to me, she couldn't be more than 5'6" and had toned body, like she ran a lot.
"I'm Ruthie by the way." She says with soft smile in my direction.
"Embry," I say, not reaching out my hand to shake hers, I didn't want her to feel how absolutely warm I was.
"Embry," she says and I love the way the sound seems to just roll off her tongue. I swallow and bite my lip, quickly running my eyes up her body again. "You're Quileute aren't you?"
"Yeah, how'd you know?" I ask and she leans back in her chair, her body relaxing as she becomes more comfortable with me.
"Just a lucky guess, it was either Makah or Quileute and the Quileute Reservation's closer." She runs a hand through her blonde hair and the cinnamon smell intensifies.
"Well I'm Makah too." I reply and she lifts her brows up.
"So I guess I would have been a lucky guesser either way, huh?" She shakes her head and looks down at her notebook. There are photographs taped to the cover, I look at them carefully and almost pass out when I find a picture of a large, very large, grey wolf with a whiter face looking straight at the camera. It was me, but how could she get a picture of me as a wolf without me realizing.
"The wolf." I say evenly and she looks up, her hand instinctively covering the picture.
"What about it?" She asks, her voice almost defensive as she pulls her notebook closer to herself.
"How'd you get a picture of it without it seeing or smelling you?" She licks her lips and stares at me, her eyes meeting mine and she squints, like she recognizes me.
"16.7x zoom lens and I stood down wind. I thought he saw me because he looked right at me but I guess he didn't because he walked away from me after I got that shot." She explains as she lifts her hand up carefully, she studies it and then looks at me again. Her eyes are on my eyes and I look away from her quickly.
"Where was his pack?" I ask her, trying to get a good idea when she could have possibly taken the photo. Surely one of us would have seen or smelt her.
"I don't know, I think he's rogue. He was completely alone when I saw him two weeks ago. I think he left his pack." She says, before opening her notebook and pulling the pencil out of her backpack. Our Marine Biology class was just starting and I found myself annoyed. It didn't seem like she knew very much but I was still curious.
I wanted to tell her that the wolf didn't leave his pack. The pack left him, after everything that happened with the Cullen's Jacob left and is somewhere in Alaska with Renesmee, Quil decided to go to school to be closer to Claire, Sam and Emily got married, Paul gave up his wolf form entirely and lives in Seattle with Rachel, Jared went to school in California with Kim, Leah moved to Oregon and works in a bookstore, and Seth imprinted. None of them had any reasons to be wolves anymore, so I found myself alone, trying to find a reason for myself to stop phasing and deep down I wished I would just imprint so I would find it.
The class drones on for the next two hours but I'm happy to finally be taking college courses. I was tired of high school and the drama, mostly vampire drama, which came along with it. When the class finishes, Ruthie seems to take her time packing up her backpack, like she's waiting for me to say something else to her.
I pick up my backpack and stand up, my hulking frame towering over her and she looks up at me. She smiles and then stand up, turning away from me as she heads towards the door. I wanted to stop her and say something, maybe ask her to get coffee with me, but I don't so I walk out the door and off campus of the little Port Angeles community college.
My black pickup isn't hard to locate in the parking lot and I'm out of Port Angeles before I know it. I don't know why I'm in such a hurry to get home, it wasn't like I had any friend waiting there for me. I park the tuck in front of my mom's gift shop when I get back on the Res and sigh, loudly when I get inside. My mom smiles at me from behind the counter and I kick over the doorstop as I walk by.
"Embry," my mom says and I sigh again, turning around to sit it back up, "what's wrong?"
"Nothing mom," I say as I sit on the stool next to the counter. My mom eyes me and then puts a hand on my shoulder.
"Why don't you call Jacob or Quil? I'm sure they would love to hear from you." My mom says and I shrug my shoulders, I knew they really didn't care if they heard from me or not. I think of that girl again and how she probably has a ton of friends, a pretty blonde like that probably has a boyfriend too. The thought riles me and I slap my hand on the counter.
"I'm going to go for a walk," I snap at my mom before walking out through the back door and towards the forest. I phase as soon as I hit the deepest part of the woods.
"Embry?" Jacob says as soon as I phase, the great thing about being a wolf is that no matter how far you were, you could still talk to you best friend.
"Hey Jake," I say as I stretch out and trot through the forest. I start making my way towards Port Angeles, picturing the blonde again.
"She's pretty, who is she?" Jacob asks and I stop, sniffing the air before heading towards the creek.
"Some girl in my Marine Biology class, her names Ruthie. She has a picture of me on her notebook." I say before explaining the entire story to Jacob, he listens intently and when I finish he chuckles.
"And you're sure you didn't imprint on this girl?" Jacob asks and I sigh in response, "Alright so you didn't imprint, but what if you never imprint Embry? Are you just going to let this girl go?"
"What if I do imprint while I'm seeing her? I can't break a girls heart like how Sam broke Leah's." Jacob stays silent, thinking about it.
"I still think you should go for it Embry, this girl has a picture off you as a would taped to her notebook. This could be your chance Embry, to find something that doesn't keep you tied to being a wolf. She lives in Port Angeles, she doesn't even need to know you're a wolf, the two of you if this works out can go anywhere in the world together and she would love you for you and not because you imprinted on her Embry. You have the shot of having a real life and I think that's what you need, so you should take it." Jacob says but I can't bring myself to agree with him.
"I don't know Jacob." I reply as I stop short, I was about to cross over to the Port Angeles side of the forest.
"Don't wait forever to imprint Embry; this girl just might be the one who saves you. I've got to go, but keep me posted." Before I can even say goodbye, I'm left to my own thoughts.
I dip my head low and stare at my furry grey feet. I think of a life without me imprinting, a life where I have to get a girl to fall in love with me and stay in love with me. I think of that pretty blonde and me in ten years living anywhere we wanted, with our kids and me never having to worry about imprinting because I gave up phasing for a girl I wanted to fall in love with. The idea sounds amazing, that life looks amazing, and I feel like I can reach out and grab. I could live that life, I could start controlling it from here on out. I didn't need to be a wolf anymore, there were phones to keep in touch with my friends, I could finally be normal.
The idea of normality scares me though and I growl, walking back to the creek to the creek. I dip my head to drink some of the cold water and find my reflection looking back at me. As a wolf I felt invincible but there's this part of me that feels so alone. As a human I feel angry but I know I wouldn't have to be alone. There were people out there that could help me chase the anger away. I could finally have the life I always wanted, so why couldn't I just give up on being a wolf right now.
It was because I didn't know if any girl could ever love me without imprinting on me. I wasn't anything special, I wasn't exceptionally smart, or funny, nor did I have a lot to give a girl. She would really have to get to know me to fall in love with me and I don't know if I was prepared for countless rejection from all these different girls that I would have to date to find the right one.
But there was Ruthie. We seemed to connect today; maybe I could ask her out to coffee and see where we can go from there. I could just be her friend at first see if we had any chemistry, maybe she could help me try and be normal or maybe she knew a girl in Port Angeles that I could just imprint on and not have to deal with any of this.
I picture Ruthie in my head again. Her blonde hair just barely reached the middle of her back, she seemed to know what she was talking about in class, and she was afraid of wolf me. She was absolutely fantastic from what I could pick up today and perhaps she would be worth it.
I shake my head and let out a long lonely howl. Both wolf and human me are scared and confused and I don't even know what to think anymore.
Here's an Embry story I've been working on. My sister isn't taking any part in this one.
Can I have some feedback? I know this chapter isn't that good but I have some plans for this story.