I'm Not Stephenie Meyer!
A/N: Sorry about the last story! This one will should stay fine! Hope you like it!
"Nessie!!" I rolled out of bed too see that is was eleven. Groggily I took a brush through my bronze curls, brushed me teeth and walked down the stairs.
"Rose? Alice? What do you need?" I loved them too death, but they know weekends I sleep in. They both had huge tacky grins on their faces; no good can come of this.
"Well," Rose began, "we made you a profile on this dating site!" No way!!
"Nessie, don't worry, it's a site that Rose put up! Most of the pack is logged in to. All we have to do is get your description of the perfect guy." Alice tried to explain.
"You both know what Jacob looks like! Just put that in!" I moaned. "No, we're not describing Jacob!" Rose cried.
"Ok, someone tall, sweet, and funny. Can stand the smell of my family. Oh and keeps me on my toes." I was describing Jake, but everybody-except Seth- was at least 6'1.
"Ok, done!" Alice cheered.
"What now?"
"We wait a week and see who you're matched up with!" Alice explained.
One week later…"NESSIE!!!!!!" Today we would see whom I was matched with.
"Ok," I winced, "who did I get matched with?" Alice and Rose were cracking up.
"Well," Rose had to stop because she was laughing, "it says your 56% compatible with Seth, -"
"God no! I will not go out with Seth!" I shrieked.
"Chill, Nessie! 14% with Embry, and only 30% with Jacob!" Rose was bubbling with delight.
"I'm not going out with Seth!" I cried.
"Well, we told Seth you would!" Alice giggled.
"Fine! Where are we going?" I demanded.
"Oh, I know that!" Emmett boomed. I dashed over there.
"Where?!"
"Sworn to secrecy!" Emmett chuckled. I could kick him but I won't.
"Dudes! Just tell her!" Jasper shouted.
"Ok, he's taking you to see Elmo!" Alice and Rose laughed.
"I'm not going!!!!!!!!!!" I shouted.
Why not?" Emmett chuckled.
"Because Elmo is a stalker!!!!" {A/N: this is a big inside joke!}
"How is that?" my Dad was here, now, too.
"Because! He talks to a flippen fish! He kisses random babies!! And he can always talk to that weird dude!"
Then knock, knock; Seth was here! Curse my Aunt's.
"Dad? Make Seth leave!" I begged
"Sorry, Nessie, I can't." he said sympathetically.
"Can you stall, while I change?" I asked.
"Yes."
"Thanks." I ran upstairs and found my dark denim jeans and a black top. And black ballet flats.
"You look happy!" Emmett joked.
"Just giddy!" I retorted.
I walked outside, "Hey Seth."
"Hi." He mumbled.
The car ride was quiet and boring; Seth rambled on about school; "Mr. Blah blah, detention…. Weeks." Seth said.
So it seemed like I was paying attention I occasionally I gave a "Hmmm" or "Really?"
"We're here!" Ms. Clearwater announced, oh joy.
Seth finally found our seats and I was prepared for the worst.
"Seth I'm not feeling well I'm gonna go to the restroom. " please don't figure out that I'm avoiding you.
"Ok." Yes!! I ran down to the restrooms and called Jake.
Ring, ring, ring…."Hey, Ness! What're up to?" he didn't seemed concerned.
"My aunts' set me up on a date with Seth!" I cried. "They told him to take me to see Elmo live!"
"Wow," Jacob sighed, "how long is the show?" he cares!
"I don't know!" I wailed. "How long do you think I can stay in the bathroom?" I wondered.
"Well, if you told him you don't feel good an hour." Jacob admitted. "Don't ask how I know. Oh, I have to go; good luck, Ness!"
"Thanks, Jake." I sighed. Finally I realized how dumb it was to avoid Seth in a restroom that smelled awful!
Reluctantly I made my way back to my seat. Sadly the thing hadn't even started. Crap.
"Feeling better?" Seth asked truly concerned.
"Yeah." I lied.
Then he came out! And Seth went wild.
Oh, God, Seth loves Elmo!
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