Author's note: Happy anniversary to our Ls! This is a story I've been sitting on for about 18 months now and have decided to expand it from a one-shot to a full story. It starts shortly after "The Great Stink" in season 7 and, well, you will see how things progress from there.

Chapter 1: November 5, 2006

There was no reason ever to compare Stars Hollow with Outlander, unless one was a member of the Black, White & Read's book club and happened to read the novel because it was Miss Patty's pick for the month. Actually, reading meant a six-week-long commentary on how hot Jamie was and an intricate breakdown of the sex scenes. Miss Patty just happened to lead that discussion in the middle of the diner, which turned Luke at least six shades of red before ordering the erstwhile book club out and back to the bookstore where it belonged.

Had things been different, Lorelai would have done dramatic readings and did her very best to tease Luke into wearing a kilt, all in the name of mortifying her fiancé. But things were different, and she only heard about what happened secondhand through Babette while drinking subpar coffee and watching Christopher and G.G. play in the yard with Paul Anka.

"You should join the club," Babette said, patting Lorelai's knee when the conversation stilted. These days, that really didn't take long. "Get your mind off of things."

"I think I'll go for a walk," Lorelai replied, setting the coffee cup aside. She managed a smile for Babette, waved to Christopher and G.G., and ducked back in the house for her purse.

She had gone walking a lot in the days since the ultimatum, when a woman she didn't even recognize had driven to Boston and had done the one thing that would drive the love of her life away from her forever. Walking was the only thing that kept her reasonably sane as she gave in and decided to try a real relationship with Christopher. She wasn't going to get the man she really wanted, and it was her fault. Well, his as well, but still. She had been the one to fire the final bullet into the ashes of their engagement.

Why not settle for what she could actually have?

Part of her knew she needed to break it off with Christopher, but she just didn't think she had enough inner strength to give him that final shove. When she was around him, she was happy. Ish. More accurately, she was forgetting the chasm of pain that seemed to crack open every time Lorelai was alone and was confronted with all of her mistakes. So she made sure to surround herself with people, because then she could pretend to be the normal Lorelai. The more she pretended, the more she could avoid everything that she had lost. Hell, she was willing to put up with the town reeking of pickles just to avoid having to face Luke.

More signs that a long-term relationship with Chris was a bad idea were emerging with each day they spent as a couple. Sherry had written that she regretted leaving G.G. behind, and she urged Chris to bring her to France for a visit. He in turn had invited Lorelai to go with him. Running away to France sounded appealing. Too appealing.

But her problems would still be there when she got back, something that Rory had learned the hard way after sleeping with Dean two years earlier. There was no "getting out of jail free" cards in real life, no reboots. Lorelai's life was in shambles, and her attempts to pick up the pieces were feeble at best. It was a patchwork job that was fooling no one, except maybe Chris.

Lorelai wandered away from the center of town. She took care on her sojourns to avoid anywhere near the square. Anywhere that would put her in seeing-eye distance of a certain diner. Her heart just couldn't take it. So she went in the opposite direction, pacing up and down the sidewalks on the outskirts of Stars Hollow that seemed to escape Taylor Doose's meticulous eye. She speed-walked past the Twickham House, managing to keep the tears in check.

Not far past the house, a dirt trail caught her eye, and Lorelai paused. She'd lived in Stars Hollow for more than 20 years and had spent the past six months making regular circuits of the outskirts, and this was the first time she'd seen this particular path. Curious, she veered off the sidewalk.

The shaded trees cooled the air by a good 10 degrees, and Lorelai closed her eyes to enjoy the breeze as she walked. Her internal compass wasn't that bad, and she estimated she was wandering toward the Independence Inn property. Going there would be good for her soul, remembering when things had been so simple.

She would have to bring Rory here the next time she was home. Had things turned out the way she wanted, she would have run back to the diner and coaxed April to come exploring with her. But that was a thing of the past. Lorelai had well and truly ruined any chances she had of even interacting with Luke's daughter. Anna Nardini made it very clear that she didn't find Lorelai worthy of being around April, and if she knew what Lorelai had done with Christopher … a wave of nausea swept over her, and she pushed it away.

She emerged from the path into a clearing, a ring of circular stones in the center. It almost looked like someone intended to lay a campfire there. Lorelai had gained a little knowledge from Luke about the basics of camping. That first fall they dated, he had taken her up to the cabin his family had owned, and they had huddled together outside before a fire as she made s'mores and enticed him to eat one. He had done so, only mildly grumbling as she reminded him that eating small amounts of chocolate was healthy. He corrected her that it was actually dark chocolate, and their banter had culminated in him tumbling her onto the blanket and …

Lorelai blinked when her eyes watered, and she took a deep breath. No thinking about Luke. She couldn't do that. Right. Weird circle of stones. She squinted at them. They were spaced too far apart to be a fire circle.

She walked into the center of the circle and turned slowly around. Some sort mini-Stonehenge project? Rory had attempted that in the diner when she was 10, grabbing every single napkin holder and ketchup bottle and arranging them in a circle in one corner. She proceeded to give every customer a lecture about Stonehenge for the next three hours until Lorelai realized where she was and had rushed in to save her from Luke. She had expected him to be angry, but instead, he'd been amused.

"She's great," he had boasted as Rory gravely informed Kirk, Gypsy, and Taylor about Stonehenge. "She keeps Kirk outta my hair, and what she's got to say is really interesting. If there weren't child labor laws involved, I'd hire her to do this permanently."

Lorelai closed her eyes and willed away her memories once again. That was the whole problem. Trying to forget Luke was literally cutting away a third of her life and shoving it in a box in the attic, not to be opened until Christmas 2018. She could barely remember the date she had gone on with Chris a week earlier, but she remembered with crystal clarity every moment of her first date with Luke — from when she met him behind the diner to escape in the truck before everyone could notice to when he shyly asked if she wanted coffee and she had grabbed his shirt and pushed him against the door to kiss the daylights out of him.

She hugged herself. Sex. Oh, there was a barrel of worms right there. A couple of weeks ago, she had leaped back into that area for the first time since the night of the ultimatum, and it had been … muted. She knew herself, knew her body's responses, and that she was pretending again. It was like part of herself was standing behind a glass wall, watching the people move on the other side and barely feeling anything. She did and said what was expected and pretended at exactly the right moment to make Chris think that she had gotten something out of it.

Sex had been good with Chris once upon a time. That time being in the pre-Luke era, when she hadn't known the depths to which she could actually feel. As the weeks went by, her desire for sex with Chris was diminishing to the point that during the pickle debacle, she begged off and claimed she was having her period.

"Oh honey," Miss Patty's voice echoed in her head. "Life is too short for bad sex."

Lorelai sighed. This wasn't fair. It wasn't fair to herself, Rory, Chris, or G.G. It was time. She had given it a shot with Chris, and she just couldn't see him in her Stars Hollow world. Nor was she a fit for his Hartford one. She would tell him he was going to Paris alone, and she would finally figure out what to do next. Maybe one day in the remote future, Luke would actually work his way around to forgiving her. Maybe.

She closed her eyes and allowed herself to miss Luke for one solid minute. Sixty seconds of love and memories and piles upon piles of regret. Then she took a deep breath, stepped out of the circle, and started her way home to face the future.

OK. Something was different.

Lorelai emerged from the path back onto the street, a few paces away from the Twickham House. She scanned the block, and everything seemed normal. But there was a difference too. It was something in the air. It made her feel antsy, and before she realized what she was doing, Lorelai was making her way to the town square. Yes, it was the last place she was trying to avoid, but something in her gut said she had to check out the heart of Stars Hollow.

Maybe it was because she was finally making a decision, a real decision to move on with her life. She would get herself sorted out before dating anyone. Four months was simply not enough time to recover from an intense 2-year relationship and engagement with the man she loved more than anyone else except her daughter. Hell, it had only been three weeks since the breakup that she even began dating Chris. It would involve the stickiest of emotions, but she refused to run away any longer. She wanted some semblance of her old life back. She owed it to Rory, she owed it to her friends, and most of all, she owed it to herself.

Lorelai was out of breath by the time she reached the square, carefully inspecting the buildings as she walked by them. They all appeared absolutely normal: the gazebo, the market, the dance studio, the bookstore, the bakery, Al's Pancake World, the diner … Her stomach knotted with fear when she realized where she was. No, no, she wasn't prepared to handle a cool glare from Luke, that mixture of indifference and fury he sent her way every time they had the unfortunate luck to run into each other in the days since the ultimatum.

Instinct had her glancing through the diner windows, hoping for one peek of him at work. A junkie needing her fix, she realized with great irony. But instead of coffee she craved, it was the angel who served the life-giving beverage. His back was to her, and he was wearing a different baseball cap. Not the black one he'd donned in the days since they ended things for good, but an old, old one. I thought I burned that one, Lorelai thought absently, so caught up in her own thoughts that she forgot to move before he turned and looked out the window, straight at her.

Lorelai sucked in a deep breath, bracing for whatever scathing look Luke was sure to send her way. Instead, he looked vaguely puzzled. Then he shook his head and turned back to take someone's order.

Well. That was weird. Puzzled was definitely higher up on the scale than pure and utter loathing. Lorelai frowned and took in the town once more. No, it wasn't her imagination. Something really was off, like everything was slightly out of tune. She knew the melody but was a couple notes behind. Maybe she needed more sleep. Maybe …

"Are you gonna stand there scaring away everyone or come in here and get some coffee?"

Lorelai yelped at the sound of Luke's voice, nearly tripping over her feet and running into the lamp post. He stood in the diner's doorway, eyebrows arched with half-amusement, half-annoyance. "What?" she squeaked.

Luke sighed. "I hate to say this, especially to you, but you look like you need some coffee. Are you gonna come in or just stand there until Taylor comes out and hounds you for loitering?"

"Coffee," Lorelai managed. "Definitely coffee." She sped toward the diner as if the hounds of hell were at her feet, or rather Taylor's OCD regarding Stars Hollow. She nearly collided with Luke as he took a step back to give her leeway. He shrugged and let the door close as Lorelai took a good look around the diner for the first time in months. It too seemed like something was off, and she bit her lip as she studied her home away from home. Suddenly, she felt large, familiar hands on her shoulders and found herself being propelled toward the stools at the counter.

"Sit down, you're gonna to scare everyone in here. Except maybe Kirk." Luke all but pushed Lorelai onto a stool, and she gripped the counter as he walked around it and pulled down a mug. "What's gotten into you?"

"Nothing! Nothing, I just went for a walk. You know, fresh air, sunshine, exercise. Toning up the muscles, but not in the Richard Simmons way. That would involve way too much aerobics, leg warmers and 80s hair, and there's a reason we're no longer in the 80s."

Luke sighed and placed the mug in front of her, pouring the coffee that she craved. "Shouldn't be giving this to you at all," he muttered.

No, Lorelai agreed, you shouldn't be. But you are. She pulled the mug to her and inhaled deeply.

"At least you haven't broken your leg like the time you tried yoga," Luke groused.

"Well, walking is safer. One foot in front of the other. I could take up running."

"I hope your health insurance is paid up before you do that."

"Rude!" Lorelai sniffed, relieved that they were bantering. If they were bantering, then maybe, just maybe Luke had figured out how to forgive her. Her heart soared, and she took a sip of coffee. She closed her eyes and hummed with pleasure, then took another sip. She opened her eyes in time to see Luke staring at her, a dark and intense in his eyes that she recognized. He quickly startled and turned away, grabbing an order as Cesar pushed it through the window. Her toes curled. He once confessed that watching her drink coffee was highly erotic for him, and it served to explain some of the times he abruptly pulled her into the storeroom and kissed her within an inch of her life. If she was turning him on, it meant he wasn't repulsed by her presence.

"So," Lorelai asked casually, absently picking up the menu she knew by heart. "How's April?"

"Huh?" Luke turned back to her and gave her another of those puzzled looks. "Who's April?"

Lorelai laughed. "Who's April? OK, Jerry Seinfeld, everyone knows she's your …" Her voice trailed away as she stared at the menu in her hands, one she hadn't seen in nearly four years. "What happened to your new menus?"

"What new menus?"

"The ones Nicole talked you into doing."

Luke just stared at her for a long moment. Then he took her coffee away.

"Hey!"

"I was wrong. You don't need this. You need a shrink."

"Hello pot, meet kettle!" Lorelai shot back and lunged for the coffee mug. Luke set it out of reach. As she flailed for it, she caught sight of the walls. The walls she had painted after talking Luke into doing so, then accidentally skipped out on it thanks to Christopher. Everything looked the way it was the year that Rory started Chilton, the year their lives began to change as she dated Max. For the first time, Lorelai studied Luke closely. He hadn't changed that much in the past few years, but she knew him so well that she recognized the subtle signs of aging that happened thanks to trying to raise Jess and deal with April. Those were all gone. He looked the same as he did when Rory started high school.

She found herself staring at her hands, then gasped. The tan line on her ring finger from where she had worn Luke's ring for a year was gone. It looked like nothing had ever rested there. The tiny scar she'd gotten at the base of her thumb while making costumes for the Festival of Living Art during Rory's first year in Yale was also gone.

"Luke," Lorelai asked a bit shakily, "what's today's date?"

"Forget to look at a calendar this morning?"

"Just tell me!"

Luke rolled his eyes and snagged a newspaper from the far side of the counter where a customer had left it. "Here, see for yourself."

Lorelai shook out the paper and studied the masthead, dropping the paper in shock. "No, it can't be! That just doesn't happen! This can't be real! Is this real?" She gestured at the paper.

He leaned on the counter. "You see, when mommy paper and daddy ink have a date inside of a printing press …"

"Luke." Actually, that hadn't been half bad.

Lorelai's gaze fell to the paper, to the masthead that read October 11, 2000, roughly a week after Rory had started Chilton. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she felt the universe shift, then click, and she knew she was in deep trouble.