Jace sighed. He'd been planeswalking for the past – what was it – thousand years? He'd gone so long without blowing his load in anything other than Ravnican stable-boys. He longed for the days before he came a planeswalker – days when he partook in the excess of sex, drugs and black magic. "God," thought Jace, though there many in the Multiverse, "if only I had some hot pussy to feast on right now."

Speaking of hot pussy, Chandra was on the other side of the mountain where Jace was. By the way, Jace was on a mountain, and Chandra was too. Chandra was also feeling super horny, and the only time she was ever satisfied was when she was burning villages to the ground. The pleasure of incineration made her wet with pleasure, but the flames always put out her moisture so no one ever noticed. "Ugh! I'm so horny! I'd even settle for some Goblin dick right about now..."

Just there, an explosion happened somewhere. Jace and Chandra stopped thinking about sex and sex things and ran to it. By the time they both got there, the person (or Nicol Bolas) who made the explosion was gone. Their eyes then met each other, and their relationship was reignited. It was almost as intense as the Sam and Diane reunion on Cheers.

"Funny to see you here, blue mage," said Chandra, hornily.

"Likewise, red wizard," replied Jace, confusedily. He had fought with Chandra in the past, but he was so horny that it felt like cum was going to burst from his eyes and nose. He had to do something, and it was something that no Magic could solve.

Chandra was also feeling super horny. Despite her hatred for Jace, he did have a dick, and she wagered it was a good one. There was a rumor that the bigger a guy's hair is, the bigger his dick is – and Jace had a really stupid haircut with lots of hair. She slid coyly over to Jace, trying her best to make him aroused.

"What are you doing, Nalaar?" asked Jace, super hornily. He didn't want to let it slip that his cock was now throbbing; harder than a Calcite Snapper. He needed to take away the shroud so he could get his rocks off, however, and Chandra was kinda hot, in both sense of the word.

"Please, Beleren. You and I have both been searching The Amulet of Harbingers for ages now, and we both know that we have urges. Urges that we can't settle with Magic."

Jace was hornier than he'd ever been before, and in high school he won the award for Most Horny. As his sense of reason went away and his primal instincts kicked in, he decided to curb his logical thought processes... just for a little while.

Within seconds, the two powerful wizards had taken off their robes and wizard hats, and were pouncing on each other like Kavus. Chandra started by lighting Jace's hard dick on fire with special Sex Magic, which made Jace even hornier. Jace was so horny that he ignited another spark, and became not only a Planeswalker, but a Fuckwalker as well. Chandra was astounded – she couldn't lose to Jace! So she also got super horny and became a Fuckwalker.

The two then started fucking, and it was like the Big Bang was occuring on this very mountain. Their sounds of ecstasy resounded through the entire world like sonic booms, and it's said that some of them even crossed through to other dimensions. The sounds were apparently so erotic that everyone else in the world became instantly horny as well. Soon enough, everyone in the world was fucking as a result of Jace and Chandra's fabulous fuck fest.

Jace came with the force of a million suns, and Chandra also did. Their combined orgasms ripped a hole in the Multiverse, and Eldrazi arrived after demolishing Zendikar. As the two magicians regained their senses, they noticed the alien menaces approaching and turned back to each other.
"You're not bad, blue mage," said Chandra.

Jace nodded back. "Likewise. But we've got a bigger problem on our hands now."

The two buried their long history of hatred that day, and planeswalked off into the sunset to fuck up some Eldrazi – and then, possibly, each other.