Chapter 1

I know this is an unusual pairing for me to write based on what I've written in the past but well … not only is this a Twilight fanfiction but it is also an Alice x Bella pairing affectionately known as Bellice. I recently read a certain fanfiction (Age Doesn't Matter In Love) that really caught my eyes to this coupling so I couldn't help but love these two in a pairing and that was the end of it. I had to write a fanfiction with their couple pairing! Throughout it will only be Bella's thoughts by the way because like this author I think it's a good idea for everybody to have to agonize with not knowing how Alice feels. Oh and as a warning Bella's slightly OOC and swears, not a whole light but she does, and this is an AU story.

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, Stephanie Meyers does.

The Beginning

Finally I had made it here, I finally made it through my dreaded senior year at Phoenix High School and now it was time to face my last years of schooling … college. I was several states away from home now in Seattle, Washington but I felt some comfort in not having to deal with bad memories there. I was more than a little anxious as to who my new roommate would be, I sincerely hoped it would be Angela since she had been my best friend since middle school in seventh grade when we first met. This kid knocked my books all over the floor and she had been the only person kind enough to help me pick them all up since that jerk face just left me to look like a fool. Since then we were the best of friends and had yet to get sick of each other since all those years ago and I was glad to have a constant best friend in my life.

We only went to the same college through pure luck and coincidence that the college had the majors we both wanted to get into, Angela wanted to become a world famous Psychologist and I wanted to get to travel the world with language interpretation. I could almost speak Italian and French as well as English. I also wanted to tack on an Asian language just in case but I was hard pressed to actually pick one because they all seemed so hard due to the difference in language structure. I knew this from an Asian friend I'd made in high school, Thao Mi, I was sad when she had to leave to go back to Vietnam because she was only coming as a temporary transfer student to see what schooling was like in America and how different it was from what she was used to. To be honest I often felt ashamed with how short the school year was here in comparison to what she was used to, 180 days versus 240 at least each year.

The building anticipation was driving me crazy as each step I took brought me closer and closer to the room I would be staying in for a semester. I could feel my heart pounding, hear it drumming wildly in my head, and when I finally reached room number 246 on the second floor of the freshman dorms I took a deep breath to calm my nerves. Finally gathering my courage I placed my hand on the doorknob to open the door but before I could turn it in my hand the door opened suddenly and startled me and I let out a startled gasp. My hand felt something soft but hard, toned muscles rippled under my hand, I blinked before I felt a blush envelop my face, covering my cheeks fiercely, and I heard a beautiful laughter accompany my blunder rather then the angry reaction I had expected. I blinked for a moment, again fumbling before realization of what I'd done set in, and I jumped back and tripped to find a hard wall to bang my skull against, ignoring the evident pain throbbing in my head, I apologized profusely, mortified by my clumsiness. The girl panicked upon seeing me hit my head against the wall, after I managed to trip oh so gracefully on the carpet, with an audibly loud thud and asked with an angelic voice if I was all right.

I only felt a slight throbbing sensation but what caught my attention more was the warm hand on the back of my head and another taking hold of my arm gently, carefully. Not quite understanding why I found myself leaning into her caring touch but I felt myself flinch away as I felt her hand graze a tender part of my flesh and she frowned, the frown marred her beautiful features but somehow did not deter her beauty. I finally took note of her appearance and I could not help the blush that stained my cheeks painfully as I noticed how beautiful and adorable her face was. Her hair was a stylish disarray of raven strands, she had magnificent topaz eyes that seemed to peer into my soul effortlessly, she had the most adorable little button nose, her face was flawless and pale, her cheeks were accompanied by dimples, and her lips were full and a pale pink color. The thing that struck me the most about her though was an intoxicating scent I couldn't quite place. It reminded me of Jasmine, Thao Mi smelled like that, too.

I knew I would have a good friend in her as she helped me stand up and carried all of my things in as I stood dumbly where she had placed me, I felt like I was in a haze as her angelic voice called out to me. I shook my head and immediately regretted it because the throb that had become dull suddenly came back with a fierce vengeance and I had to place my hand against a wall to support myself because of the pain it caused me. Before I could even utter a curse I felt an arm wrap around my waist and another was placed gently on my warm hand as I was guided into the room with utmost care and I could feel my cheeks heat up yet again.

I was placed on a bed gently, still feeling light headed from the throbbing pain, and I could see how close her face was to mine as she checked the back of my head yet again and I felt flushed and heated everywhere her body met mine. "Are you okay now?" Her voice was soft and I could hear the worry and concern as I attempted to nod my head but remembered the pain from earlier and stopped abruptly and mumbled a 'yes' hesitantly. I heard her laughter again and I wondered numbly if I had died and gone to heaven because her laughter was the most mesmerizing and beautiful sound I had ever heard in my life. "I won't bite, I promise."

"I-I … I'm not scared of you!" I was mortified with how I was acting after she had been so kind to me already and I tried to utter an apology when her laughter interrupted me.

"I didn't mean that silly! So anyway I'm your roommate, I'm guessing, and my name is Alice Brandon! And if you're not 'scared' of me would you mind telling me your name?"

Her words echoed in my head as I tried to think of a response despite the heat that her touch caused me, the feeling of butterflies flying around my stomach, and this … prickling sensation, it felt like goose bumps were popping up all over my arms from the heat she caused. It burned everywhere she touched me and sent tingles and throbs throughout my body but I couldn't tell why.

"I-I … I'm Bella. Bella Swan." My voice quivered and I couldn't believe how stupid I was being and I felt a strong urge to slap myself in the face to get out of this … state of mind. What the hell was wrong with me? I was acting like a stupid idiot who couldn't think! I felt the urge to slap myself and nearly did so if I didn't notice her hand was still on my head and I nearly sighed but then she would have caught it being as close as she was to me. I couldn't concentrate on anything with her hand on my head first of all, secondly her being this close was distracting me, and thirdly I took notice of her fragrant breath and I felt intoxicated by the scent coming from her. What kind of gum was she chewing to smell so amazing? Or maybe it was the mouth wash or toothpaste she used?

Oh my god I just realized that I had been sitting there and staring at her for at least five minutes after I spoke and I was being an idiot, a complete grade A idiot! I took a deep breath before releasing it to try and calm myself down but it wasn't working out as I had planned because I could feel how close she was because it bounced back at me. I tried to move my head away but to no avail as she kept her hand firmly where it was on the back of my head and I resigned myself to being an idiot around her. My mind just completely shut down on me again until I felt her move away from me and I felt cold where her body heat had been surrounding me previously. What was this feeling? Why was it consuming me and sending aching throbs throughout my entire body?

"I'll go grab an ice pack for you since you seem to be in a bit of a daze and the ice pack will help the swelling go down a bit. I'll be right back ok?" She spoke without any hesitation and she walked with an amazing grace, such agility from her nimble limbs and I couldn't help but notice how lithesome her body was. I found myself staring at her butt and I finally noticed her attire, she was dressed in a white button down shirt and simple jeans.

Before I could stop my body from reacting, or rather my big mouth, a shout poured forth from my mouth, "NO!" I yelled. I blinked in surprise and covered my mouth with my hands realizing what I had just said.

I heard a quiet giggle and I could almost feel my face just cooking from the heat that had enveloped them. It was so embarrassing that I couldn't control my body all of a sudden and what I said and what my body did was completely out of my power. "I will be back soon you silly goose!" she didn't seem to be mocking me in anyway and for that I was immensely thankful for. "I'm just going to go down to the kitchen area and grab an ice pack so I'll be back in five minutes tops." She seemed to be more amused than confused by my actions than anything. Maybe she thought I was being loopy and weird because I had jumbled up my brain earlier? Who knows but I was being weirder than I could ever remember being.

"I, uh, yeah, right." I hated stuttering and stumbling all over my words like that but I couldn't help it. I was making more of a fool of myself than I imagined possible and I resolved to never speak to her unless it was absolutely necessary. Everything was just so confusing now and all I wanted was Angela by my side so we could talk and I could figure this thing out. No, it would be better if I got to talk to Angela I could forget about what an idiot I was being around this stranger, my roommate. I heard another giggle before she smiled and left the room. Her smile made my heart skip a beat and I felt hot all over, not just my cheeks but everywhere and I knew I had to get out of here and find Angela.

I texted Angela quickly asking what dorm room she was in and it turned out she was only down the hall a few rooms. I left the room without thinking and immediately felt the dizziness from my throbbing head but I ignored it and walked with my hand against a wall until room 258 came into view and I knocked hesitantly. I felt a rush of air and soon enough I saw Angela's face come into view and I smiled happily at her.

"Whoa what happened to you Bella?" she asked in a concerned voice and I shot her a confused look and she indicated my stance. I was still using the wall to support most of my weight, which didn't go unnoticed by Angela because she was way too observant. I only smiled in response before another voice caught my attention.

Soon enough Alice came running down the hall from our room to stand next to me "what do you think you're doing? Bella you probably have a concussion and that's why you need to stay in the room and put this ice pack on your head! My goodness gracious when I got back and saw you standing here I thought you'd gone mad or maybe hit your head a little too hard! Come on we have to get back! Oh and your friend can come too." She seemed to add the last part as an after thought.

Angela wrapped an arm around my waist and gently led me down the hallway to my room and soon enough we were sitting on my bed with Angela to my right and Alice to my left. I was sandwiched between them but I didn't mind at all and Alice's movement was gentle and careful as she put the ice pack on my head. "Do you want to lie down so it's a little easier for you? I mean we still have a whole week ahead for you to unpack and settle down so you can just relax for today. My father is a doctor so I know it would be best for you to relax the rest of the day and your friend can stay with you the entire time if you want. I really don't mind." She flashed me another brilliant smile that left me dazed again and I felt Angela moving beside me and her movement seemed to snap me out of my daze.

I could already tell from Angela's look that she was being her observant self about something and it caused curiosity to flood my mind. What was that look on her face for? I really wanted to know what she was thinking at that moment and to be honest sometimes I wish I could read minds, especially Angela's mind, but then other times I knew for sure I would not want to know what was going on in her head. I sighed as I lay down with the ice pack under my head and Alice moved away, and I immediately felt at a loss without her warmth for some odd reason, and sat on her own bed looking around carefully. She seemed to have made her mind up about whatever it was and moved to her luggage and I saw that she had barely anything left in it, most of everything was already in place suggesting she had gotten here very early considering I made it here around 11 this morning.

Angela lay next to me comfortably and I automatically cuddled with her, something I had a habit of doing because when I was younger I would always cuddle with a little husky I had (1). It was an unconscious action I was used to and Angela never seemed to mind and so we were cuddling on my bed. I raised my upper body for a second to adjust myself a little, noticing Alice staring over in our direction. I wondered what she was staring at when she seemed to jerk out of it and looked away. The look on her face, before she noticed my staring, was thoughtful almost in the same way Angela's were when she was being attentive.

Again I felt that want inside me for the ability to read minds because of the thoughtful look on Alice's face and the burning in her eyes. Her eyes were so intense and mesmerizing, realizing where my thoughts were headed I clenched my eyes closed and that's when I felt myself shake a little. I was remembering something from my childhood, a memory that seemed to scorn me always, never leaving me for a moment, always, always in the dark recesses of my mind.

I jumped up realizing that I had fallen asleep while I was thinking earlier and I looked down at my wrist watch to see that it was already three in the afternoon. I sat up slowly and hugged my knees and rested my head against my arms, it was a position of defeat for me, one of utter hopelessness and despair. My thoughts, when they strayed, always came back to that memory, that day that changed me completely from a child to … whatever the hell it is I am now. I felt arms softly wrap around me and knew instinctively that Angela was the one holding me and I turned so I could wrap my arms around her and nuzzle into her neck as I felt tears brimming in my eyes. I felt my utter despair and sorrow dissipate only very slightly from her comforting, warm embrace and I sighed.

"Bella … is it better now? Are you better now?" Angela's voice was soft and gentle. She always spoke the softest and gentlest during these moments of agonizing pain for me. I nodded my head slowly knowing I couldn't speak quite yet.

I pulled back slowly, not wanting to leave her embrace quite yet but knowing I had to eventually, I took a quick peek around the room to see Alice was sitting on her bed reading something, I noticed that her eyes had been on me but then she glanced away quickly. Maybe she didn't want to make it seem like she was intruding? "Yeah, I'll be okay … I think. It … will it always be this way? Will I always have to remember it?" I paused, feeling my emotions in disarray yet again and I took a deep shuddering breath to calm down. "Will … will this … will it always haunt me so much? Can't I forget that it ever happened for at least one day?" I felt the tears in my eyes again but I held them back until eventually they faded away into nearly nothingness.

Angela held me even tighter and I felt myself relax against her a little bit, a faint sigh escaped her lips. I knew why she wanted to be a psychologist, I was her reason and in some ways I felt happy and in others I just wondered. "You know Bella … I think … I will have an answer for you when I'm a world famous psychologist and I can analyze you even better!" She said this part jokingly but there was an underlying seriousness in her eyes I knew so well, I laughed lightly though because of her dramatic face. "I know though that for now, my answer is going to be no because this is something deeply rooted in your mind and it's not something you can forget so easily and you know it wasn't your fault!" She sighed, it was a withering sound, and I pulled back entirely nodding my head.

I gave her the look and she knew that I was going to go for a walk to clear my head and to be alone so I could think. The thing with Angela was I always knew I could depend on her no matter what and that I could count on her to keep my secrets safe. I looked over in Alice's direction to see that she, once again, was looking in my direction over her book I gave her a nod in acknowledgment before walking out the door. It was something that happened to me so long ago but still, it haunted me, stayed in the recesses of my mind waiting to attack me with the memory again and again when I was too relaxed. I always had to keep my guard up somehow but it wasn't happening now, I couldn't bring my guard up for some reason. I sighed as I exited the freshman dorms and headed outside and took in a deep, refreshing, breath of air and broke out into an easy and relaxed jog.

Ten minutes into my jog I realized that my stomach was yelling at me for food, screaming really quite loudly and I stopped mid-step in realization. Calm down you, you're going to embarrass me if I happen to walk by someone! And I ran to the cafeteria they called the 'Wisteria Wing' for some reason, I couldn't be sure since I wasn't really a flower person but it could be because of the purple-blue flowers surrounding the building. I wasn't 100% sure since I was only vaguely aware that the term Wisteria was the name of some kind of flower. I checked my pockets quickly to feel for some form of money or a meal card for my meal plans for this semester. I felt victorious when I took out a slightly bent card.

I walked around aimlessly, having given the cashier my meal card to get it punched, looking at all of the different foods they had on display and something caught my eyes. It looked like an Asian dish that my friend had talked about before being one of her favorite foods from her culture. I tried recalling the name before it hit me, it was one of the simplest names of the foods she had introduced me to, Phơ! I recalled it being very delicious and filling and so I asked for a medium sized bowl of it and walked to an empty table before I heard someone call out my name. I looked around until I saw Angela and Alice along with someone I didn't recognize all sitting at a table for four. Angela sat next to the girl I didn't know, leaving me to sit next to Alice, and so I walked over to them with a smile and sat down easily.

Looking at Angela's dish I noticed that we had gotten the same thing and I smiled wider at that, it seemed that we also had the same taste in foods often. Angela smiled back at me and I felt nostalgia hit me as Angela spoke up "yeah I remember how Thao Mi's mom used to cook this all the time for us and I still can't believe it really took 5 whole hours to make the broth! Oh how I wish we could've spent more time with her or see her one last time before she had to leave and go back you know?" I nodded in agreement before I gave her a look and she knew instantly what I had asked her silently, she gave me a knowing look. "Oh this is my roommate, Bella. Her name is Jessica. Bella is my best friend Jessica and we've been best friends since we were in middle school." Angela finished with a satisfied smile. I returned the look.

Jessica was a brunette but there was something I didn't like about her at first glance but I tried to play nice anyways and shook the hand she put out hesitantly. "Like, oh my god it is like, so nice to meet you!" I knew what it was now, oh my god her voice sounded like nails on a chalk board and her tone was so valley girl I wanted to find a gun and shoot myself in the head to get rid of her annoying voice. Maybe earplugs would work out just as nicely?

I glanced around for a napkin since I knew it would be messy and I saw Angela was prepared with a good amount of napkins at her side and I snatched a few causing a 'hey!' response and I only smiled at her fake glare. She gave up trying to be mad at me and the corners of her lips turned up into an understanding smile. I had almost a year to practice using chopsticks but I could barely handle them still with my innate clumsiness. I gave a quick glance over to Alice to see her eyes dart away from mine quickly and I felt the confusing feelings bubbling in my stomach again and the tingling sensation running up my spine and all over my body. It was just so odd, confusion ran through me again.

The look on Angela's face gave away that she wanted to ask me how I was doing now after a quick jog and I reached out for her hand, feeling the familiar warmth, and I smiled at her and nodded. "How do you do that Bella?" I gave her a questioning look, raised eyebrows and all, and her response was to roll her eyes at me and give my hand a playful smack causing me to laugh. "You know what I mean Bella! You always seem like … its like you can read my mind sometimes and well … I'll admit it's just the tiniest bit freaky."

I gave a theatrical gasp before pulling my hand out of hers and swatting at her hand playfully before saying with as much dramatics as I could "how dare you say such a thing to me! We were friends for all of these years and you insult me so! Well I know where to never place my trust again! Never again shall I speak to you on nights where cold haunting dreams disturb my sleep! We shall never speak again of this and never shall I entrust with you anything again! Be still my lonely breaking heart! Oh how you hath betrayed me, my friend! This ache you have caused, this deep sorrow, cannot be forgotten nor forgiven! Be still as Angela tears us apart! Goodbye Angela, for parting is such sweet sorrow!" I had taken a theater class in high school and this was the outcome. I looked at Angela and we both burst out into laughter just as I finished the very last word and I heard a giggle to my right accompany us and I looked over to see Alice also laughing. Her head was thrown back as laughter erupted from her and a hand covered her stomach before she dropped her head and covered her smiling mouth.

Her laughter was so musical and beautiful that I stopped to listen to her laughter and I felt an urge, no a great need to pull her hand down so she wasn't covering her smile. I shook my head at my own melodramatics and looked over to Angela seeing that perceptive look in her eyes again but she quickly covered it up by shaking her head at me. I smiled sheepishly at her and even brought a hand up to rub the back of my neck, remembering at the last second that running my fingers on the back of my head wouldn't be such a good idea. We gave each other knowing smiles yet again.

Our moment was broken however by that whiny, high pitched squeal of a voice yet again, "you are like, so funny and melodramatic!" I felt my hand clench just a bit but my mouth was a different story, I could feel my teeth gritting almost painfully to try and hold back my urge to just punch her. God I hated her voice! I looked over at Angela just in time to see her cringe at the sound of her roommate's voice and I gave her a knowing, sympathetic look and tried to relax myself again. My jaw became unhinged and finally I stopped gritting my teeth until she spoke up again, everything went undone and I was tense again, clenching and gritting with a locked jaw. "So like, what are we going to do after this? Anybody, like, up for some shopping?" Oh how I wished to punch her or at least tell her to shut up because she squealed when she said 'shopping' and I wished, for a moment, that I had some duck tape so I could just tape that mouth shut.

"You know what, I think it would be better to just head back to our dorm rooms and get everything unpacked since we need to settle in first. I know I do after my exciting morning," I paused and looked over at Alice I noticed that she had indeed been staring again, "right Alice?" My voice softened as I said her name for some reason. I didn't understand what she made me feel and I most certainly didn't understand why I was acting the way I was either. She nodded and replied with a very soft 'yes' and had I not been listening for her response as intently as I was I knew I would not have heard it otherwise.

Silently I wondered what it was about her that just called out to me so strongly, maybe I was going to be really, really good friends with her? That could just be it. I hoped that throughout the semester we would become good friends.

(1) – I actually do this until this day because I've had the little guy since I was 4 years old! Yeah, yeah, yeah, I cuddle with my baby! ^^

Well so there's the first chapter! More will ensue soon enough! ^^ A good start for this story I hope! ^^ Oh and I just realized now today on, 12/13/10, that I titled this chapter after my favorite band JYJ's/TVXQ, international album The Beginning! I am such a TVXQ/JYJ geek! Not that I mind when they're the world's number one, not my biased, and their The Beginning album is currently number 5 in America!^^

姫宮光る