This is my entry (entries) for the Kaitaka contest on deviantart. kaitaka . deviantart . com (Check it out people)
This was spell- and grammar-checked, however, there may still fbe errors as, well, this thing is freakin long. So let me know if you catch anything.
Remember, this is fanfiction, I make no monetary profit off this.
All basically Kai's experiences.
01. Introduction
Reds and oranges of a fading summer sun, and a firm scowl set upon his face. He was nothing but a little upstart. Nothing to concern himself with. He'd be beaten soon enough, and he would realize his inadequacy in comparison to his own skills. Nothing to concern himself with. Just another pathetic barely-even-worthy-to-be-called opponent. Eyes a deep blue burning with anger, and he wasn't worried.
Wasn't nervous. Nothing to concern himself with. Never thought about losing. Never thought about how he knew little of the determination that could be found in one little boy. Nothing to concern himself with.
Nothing. Nothing. Nothing…
02. Love
It was stupid. He didn't even like the bluenette. He was an opponent. A very confusing opponent, but still nothing more.
And yet…And yet, eyes as stormy as thunder, hair bluer than an ocean's darkest depths, and sheer unfaltering determination.
No, he didn't like the blunette, could never even think of another four-letter word. But he knew that somewhere, somewhere deep deep deep inside of him, it was possible. It was all possible. With the blunette, anything was possible. Even a complete turn-around in feelings, from hate to... to... well that.
That was what scared him.
03. Light
In all his life, he'd never met another so… carefree. So full of life. And in his darkest moments, the blunette was the leading light that brought him home.
04. Dark
So he met the boy. Then he left the boy, returned to the boy, and then repeated. Until one day he left, and didn't come back.
It wasn't until years later, when he saw that same boy again, now a man, with his own little boy, that he knew he'd been replaced.
He had lived his own life, true, but he had always thought… He had taken for granted how much forgiveness even the most forgiving person could give.
A heart he thought he'd locked away from all but his own son, shattered.
05. Seeking Solace
He was proud of his son; he didn't think he had ever felt prouder.
Then again, looking at his son's opponent, he was reminded of similar battles, from years long ago. Another dual-haired boy, another blunette boy.
He remembered one of the last battles, how the blunette had won against insurmountable odds. There was pride there too, just as great.
He hadn't planned on sticking around, had just wanted to grab Gou and go. But then he had bumped into a certain blunette. Saw the challenge in his eyes, and couldn't resist. After, he wanted to leave, but Gou had argued. He had been invited to dinner and "C'mon dad! Food! Home-cooked food!" Between his and the little blunette boy's impeaching looks he couldn't say no without feeling guilty. Especially since the pleading blue eyes that stared at him struck into his memories, and when he looked up and saw that shade of blue again but in an older face…
The blunette was trying not to show how much he wanted him to come, but underneath indifference that was obviously forced, lied hope.
So he agreed, and when he and Gou were invited to stay the night later on, he couldn't refuse that either.
He felt more at home that night then he had had since he left so many years ago, and he felt peace in his heart.
06. Break Away
He felt suffocated. Everything was too much. It wasn't possible for them to have truly forgiven him, and he would have to keep leaving until he was proven right. Especially since he was starting to feel things that he had never had to deal with before. Things that were only amplified around a certain bluenette.
If he left, maybe it would go away.
07. Heaven
He didn't believe in heaven. Bright lights and perfection all found up in the skies. He didn't want fluffy clouds floating in pale blue. He would rather have storms brewing in deep oceans.
No, he didn't believe in heaven, but he figured if there was one, it would be similar to how he felt around the blunette.
08. Innocence
He missed looking into blue eyes and seeing innocence and trust radiating from within. Now that purity was tempered with control, and forethought, and while he knew he would always be forgiven, he still missed the days when the blunette was still pure through and through.
He hadn't cherished those days until they were lost to him.
09. Drive
He was often asked what was his focus, why did he keep going. At first it was his grandfather, and the lessons he had learned since childhood. Afterwards, after his world had been thrown off-kilter by a cocky kid, his original purpose disappeared. It soon became to beat the kid, which somehow morphed into protecting him, and not long later, though it took him long to realize it, it turned to loving him.
10. Breathe Again
It was years later, seeing the blunette again, and still somehow finding that never-ending stream of forgiveness, that the tight feeling in his lungs that had plagued him for so long dissipated, and he felt like he could finally breathe freely.
11. Memory
He thought that leaving would mean he'd leave the feelings behind.
But memories overwhelmed him, and it seemed like the farther he went, the more couldn't help but feel… Everything.
12. Insanity
Looking into Brooklyn's eyes, he saw what being alone and controlled by others did. He saw the splintered remains of sanity and knew that he had once been very close to that. And it scared him to know how close he had come to being like the redhead. He had never felt more grateful to the blunette who he now knew had saved him.
He hoped Hiroshi could do the same for Brooklyn.
13. Misfortune
He felt no greater pain then watching from the sidelines, unnoticed – and it would stay that way. He once thought that leaving him hurt, but that was nothing compared to this…Watching familiar blue eyes light up as a woman in white walked up to him. An ache started in his heart as his stomach churned, but he never turned away. This was his choice. He had created his own misfortunes.
14. Smile
It was hard when, even years later, he could still remember his smile, full of trust.
It wasn't until even longer that he realized that smile also encompassed love.
But by then, it was too late.
15. Silence
When he left, for what he thought would be the last time, he was met with only silence, and left in silence. When they met again, completely unexpected, there was silence.
But nothing was quiet for long with the bluenette, and it didn't long before they were beybattling again, and it was just like when they were kids. Loud crashes and booms like thunder.
And in the aftermath, they laid on the grass, and it was silent, like the calm after a storm, and comfortable.
16. Questioning
"I didn't care about you leaving. I even think I understood it." The blunette told him. "But I have to ask. Did you feel anything? Anything at all for me?"
It was a question he didn't think he could answer. But he had to try his best.
17. Blood
He thought everything would return to normal. He had been forgiven, something he'd never thought possible. It wasn't until he came home one day to Gou, frantic and crying, and Makoto telling him to calm down, "It… It happens a lot lately.", that he learned.
He walked into the kitchen to see his blunette coughing and blood dripping from the hand covering his mouth. "Takao…"
"Heh. S-Sorry Kai. I-I just…" He gave him a sad smile...
He felt his world splinter.
18. Rainbow
Reds, oranges, yellows, greens, blues, and purples. Takao had loved rainbows. Takao loved a lot of things. Now that he was gone, it was his job to love those things for him.
19. Gray
His past was darkness: his grandfather, the Abbey, the torture rooms.
His future, as the blunette kept telling him, was light: friends, freedom, and though he'd never admitted it, Takao.
With his grandfather gone, and now, Takao as well. He was left with not quite dark, and not quite light…It was more of a gray area.
20. Fortitude
It was a miracle, the doctors said, that he had lived as long as he had. He had such strength, had never given up, almost as though he had been waiting for something. It didn't feel like a miracle to him when he knew what the blunette had been waiting for, and how now that he knew he would never leave Takao again, Takao left him.
21. Vacation
Max and Rei laughing, Hilary giggling, Daichi shouting, Kenny sighing, and Takao, well Takao was hysterical, laughs exploded from him as tears streamed down his face.
He himself couldn't help but let a small smile grace his features, and when he met the blunette's happy gaze, he knew he'd never admit it, but this vacation wasn't a bad idea.
22. Mother Nature
Rain rain, go away, come again another day.
He hated the rain. Especially when he was stuck in it, and getting more and more wet by the minute. But when he looked over, he saw the happy grin on the blunette's face, and he just couldn't stop the rush of warmth that flowed through him, even through the frigid cold of the rain.
Rain rain, stay today, and come again another day.
23. Cat
No-one knew about her. Well, except maybe Takao, but other than that she was his little secret. He fed her, and occasionally she decided to invade his house. It was a welcome agreement; she didn't ask anything of him he wasn't willing to give. She reminded him of himself: cool and aloof.
It was a few months after meeting her that he found out where she kept disappearing to.
He watched as his cat was tackled by a mangy dog. Frisky and hyperactive, it was missing an ear, and his girl growled at the mutt. Chastised, the dog backed off, tongue waggling, and a stupid silly look on its face. It lay down and reached out a paw, pulling his girl into the curl of its body. Looking somewhat grumpy, but in a strange way content, the cat curled into a ball and slept, the dog soon following.
He shook his head. Animals emulating people? Or people emulating animals? Thinking of the group's last sleepover, he wasn't too sure. Especially when more joined them: a gold retriever, a black cat, a scruffy red-orange puppy, a golden-brown cocker spaniel, and a stumbling brown lab.
24. No Time
Time: It was hard, knowing how little Takao had left, especially when he thought about all that he had wasted in fights and fear.
25. Trouble Lurking
He had been on edge all day. He almost knew something was going to happen.
And when he heard the splash, and Daichi's screams and Takao laughing, he sighed.
'Trouble-maker.'
26. Tears
He ignored him. If he couldn't see the tears, couldn't see the blunette's pain, then he could convince himself that he didn't feel the same pain.
27. Foreign
Japan was strange, so different from Russia. Warmer, for one. And all the people here seemed to suffer from bouts of insanity. But Max and Rei were just as odd, so maybe everywhere but Russia was crazy.
Takao was the worst, but even at his strangest, there was that feeling of familiarity. It was like a small piece of home found so far from his own…
Which was ridiculous, because he had never had a real home, Takao was not pleasant company, and he sure as hell didn't like this place, or the blunette.
He didn't. He didn't…
28. Sorrow
Walking away, bag in hand, and the blunette never said a word, just stood there, and he pretended like he couldn't feel the hurt intertwining their hearts.
29. Happiness
He found no greater happiness, then watching him smile, and laugh, and cry. Because when he saw him feel, he could learn how to feel himself, and maybe then he could understand just what this all was.
30. Under The Rain
Still unbelievably wet, and it was showing no signs of stopping, and under normal circumstances, he would be completely irritated.
Then Takao pulled him back into the cold, wet, wet and when he started to complain, the bluenette kissed him gently, and he felt warm somehow even under the rain.
31. Flowers
It was stupid, it was mushy, it was… their first date, and he had to admit – to himself, not to anyone else – that maybe Hilary had had a good idea, when he saw Takao's face light up at the sight of flowers.
32. Night
He had a tendency to leave at night. It was easier, with fewer questions asked.
He never realized until later that he had inadvertently turned the bluenette into an insomniac.
33. Expectations
The thing with Takao was, he never asked for more than you could give. Even if you didn't realize you could give so much, he knew. His judgment of people was rarely questioned, which was probably why, though it took years for him to come to his senses, he never gave up on him.
34. Stars
He spent many nights alone in Russia, staring at the stars, the bright sparkles reminding him of their place.
And when he slept, their light followed into his dreams, blinding him just as much as the accusing blue eyes.
35. Hold My Hand
Abandoned them, betrayed them, hurt them, basically was an all around ass and yet he still… He still held out his hand.
And when he grabbed it, he felt as though everything would be alright, for the first time.
It was trust, it was a promise.
And it wasn't the last time.
36. Precious Treasure
Takao said they were looking for an artifact of some sort. They didn't mind Kai tagging along, though Mr. Kinomiya was slightly confused about his son's choice of accompaniment, and Hiroshi would give him glaring but contemplative looks every now and again.
To be honest, he and Takao didn't search too hard for the artifact after the first day, because the first night they both found an even better treasure when Takao kissed him softly and he kissed back.
37. Eyes
It was an odd feeling, when Takao told his friends he knew he had changed because of the different look in his eyes.
38. Abandoned
He had always had a reason for leaving Takao, even if the reasons weren't always good.
But it struck a chord when Rei accused him of abandoning the bluenette, and though he had denied it, something inside him, something that would twinge at the thought of hurting Takao, knew he was right.
39. Dreams
He had never dreamt much. When he did it was mostly of glorious battles and victory.
It wasn't too long after Takao saved him on the ice that he started to dream frequently, and the dreams were all of Takao.
40. Rated
Proof of Takao's immaturity: with the exception of samurai ones, he never watched a movie rated higher than PG 13.
In the lull of their competition, the group watched a lot of Disney movies, but Max and Hilary loved them too, Kenny had his laptop, Rei would watch anything, Daichi was a kid so he loved them too, though he was a guy and would therefore never admit it, and Kai… Well Kai was rather apathetic about the whole thing.
Plus it made Takao happy, so he could deal with it.
41. Teamwork
When he became captain he pushed the team to its limits, again and again, day after day.
They trained as a team, battled as a team, and complained as a team about the training… Loudly.
But they were still a team, through and through. Which was what Takao kept telling him.
"No matter how many times you leave, you're still a part of us all."
42. Standing Still
In their created world of galaxies and stars, looking into Takao's eyes, it seemed as though everything stood still, and when they returned to their world where little time had passed, he knew that it somehow had.
43. Dying
"You're… crying. You… never c-cry."
"It's nothing. I just… Takao… I… You can't…"
"Everyone… and everything… has a time to go Kai."
"…"
"I just… wish we could've… h-had a little more… time y'know? Wanted to… even our beybattling score.
"…"
"You gonna… say… anything?"
"… I love you."
"…"
"…"
"Took you… long enough. Ass, heh… L-love you too."
"Takao, please… You can't."
"Don't have much… of a c-choice do I? Sorry Kai… I really… I really wish… really… wish… hah…"
"…"
"…"
"Takao…"
44. Two Roads
It seemed as though his life was made of choices. He had always had a say in the decisions of his life. He just for the longest time took the wrong road. Usually the wrong road was the easier one.
Take the road less travelled on.
When he was older, he started taking the right roads, because in the end, those led him back to where he truly wanted to be.
'Takao.'
45. Illusion
He didn't know what their world was: hallucination, or real. But he had Takao with him, and if the bluenette was with him, then everything must be all right.
46. Family
He had never truly had a real family, and it had never concerned him.
Now, with Gou, Makoto, and Takao, he was glad he was given the chance to experience it.
47. Creation
This world full of bright stars and brighter planets, where everything was perfect and both of them content, had to have been created all from Takao's imagination, because never in his wildest dreams (which weren't all that wild, but more so after extensive periods of time spent in the blunette presence) could he have made this.
48. Childhood
People often look back on their childhood with fond memories and regrets. He was no different, especially when he looked into those deep blue eyes, and was reminded of his past.
So when he was asked to beybattle, he couldn't refuse, because he hadn't realized until then how much he had ached for the familiarity the two shared.
49. Stripes
It was an ugly, ugly, ugly shirt. Stripes don't look good on most people.
And yet somehow the stupid idiot made it look good.
But his opinion was just slightly biased.
But really, only slightly… Honest.
50. Breaking the Rules
"Geez Kai, do you ever let loose and have some fun?"
"…No."
"Y'know, you don't always have to follow the rules. Throw the rulebook away sometimes!"
"And what good would that do?"
"It's fun!"
"…Right."
"Oh c'mon! I'm serious! Let's go somewhere! Let's do something!"
"…Like what?"
"Like… Like swimming! Or getting ice cream!"
"…Alright."
"…Really?! I-I mean- Freakin' sweet! Yes! Whoop! Hey guys! No practice today where going to the beach! Thanks Kai."
"Sigh, uh-huh."
51. Sport
"Ha ha! I am the volleyball master!"
"What about Kai? He's on your team too. I think he's better. Wouldn't you agree Rei."
"Heh, I sure would Maxie."
"Hush you two! I say I'm the volleyball master and therefore I am!"
"Not everything you say is true Takao."
"Whatever! Having fun Kai?"
"…Sure."
"Told ya the beach'd be fun."
"Mmmhmm…… I am the better player."
"Whaaa? Kai!! You are not! I'll prove you wrong! I'll prove you all wrong!"
"…Sure you will."
"…Bastard."
52. Deep in Thought
The blade of grass was plucked from his mouth and a face leaned over his. "Y'know, you keep frowning like that and your face'll stick like that."
"…"
Takao sighed beside him. "Whatever. What were you thinking about?"
He shrugged, leaned over a bit, and kissed the blunette. Who blushed even as he grinned. "Oh." He murmured.
53. Keeping A Secret
"Friggin Maxie, can't keep a secret to save his life."
"If you knew that then why'd you tell him?"
"Well because I had to tell someone and I sure as hell wasn't telling you, then again I guess it doesn't matter since you know now anyways."
"…"
"…"
"I like you too."
"…Oh… Well… That's… That's alright then."
"Idiot."
54. Tower
"That's a screwed up fairy tale. I mean, was she really that vain that she just couldn't cut her hair off and get herself out of the tower on her own? I mean, why would you wait around for someone you're not sure will even show up?"
55. Waiting
"You waited for me."
"That's different. I always knew you were coming back. Just wasn't too sure when."
56. Danger Ahead
"Y'know Takao, usually if a sign says 'Danger' you don't ignore it."
"Yeah yeah I know. Now gimme your hand and help me up."
"Tch, fine."
"…Heh, bit of a role-reversal this huh?"
"…"
"But I know just like I grabbed your hand to help you, you'll always do the same, just like now!"
"… Thanks."
"Hmm? For what? I meant it."
"For saving me that day."
"Well of course! I'd never leave anyone, friend or enemy, in danger."
"And what am I?"
"Idiot. Friend of course."
57. Sacrifice
"Stupid stupid stupid! Why would you do that?"
"Would you rather I let you get hit by the car? Then again your head's so damn thick you probably wouldn't have even got a concussion."
"Screw you Kai! I didn't ask for you to do it! Why… Why would you… You idiot!"
"You're the one yelling at someone who just saved your ass."
"You shouldn't have done it! Dammit Kai you could've… I mean, you… Goddammit Kai, if you died, I…"
"…Me too… That's why I did it."
58. Kick in the Head
Kai sat there, with the blunette's head in his lap, and tried not to fret, because that would be completely out of character and probably give the others the heart attack they had only just avoided earlier.
"See this is why I said soccer was a bad idea!" Kenny said wringing his hands.
Hilary sighed. "Kenny, you just don't like sports."
"Because they're dangerous!"
"Because you suck at them." The girl muttered.
"Mmmaa?" Takao shifted in his lap, and he subtly brushed bangs from the blunette's face.
"Takao?" Daichi asked.
"Takao!" Max said. "Takao's awake!"
Takao sat up slowly, holding his head. "Owwww, anyone get the license plate of that truck? Ah, I think I'm bleeding."
"Oh!" Max said. "I'll get the first-aid kit!" He ran off.
"He doesn't even know where it is." Rei sighed, and followed the blond.
"Now we can get back to the game. Jeez, can't believe you got knocked out by a soccer ball." Daichi said and went to get the ball.
"Little brat." Takao shouted after him.
"I-I think I'll sit out for now." Kenny said and sat on the grass outside of the field.
Takao shook his head slightly, and he saw him wince.
"You alright?" He asked quietly.
The blunette turned and gave him a small smile. "Yeah, just a bit of a headache."
He felt around at the sluggishly bleeding lump on Takao's head and apologized as it made the other teen hiss in pain.
"S'not your fault." Takao muttered and then gave him puppy eyes. "Kiss it better?" He asked.
Kai sighed, but gave it a small peck before the others came over and tended to the wound, asking questions: was he alright, how badly did it hurt, why was he grinning?
Takao just shook the queries off, bandaged his cut, and after some consideration they continued the game, two of the players sending each other hidden smiles.
59. No Way Out
When he was younger and in the abbey, he always felt suffocated, as if he was trapped in a deep, dark box with no exit in sight. He never left for fear of losing the power and praise they gave him. When he was older, and realized something called freedom, he never wanted to let it go. Which was why he always left them. He never wanted to feel trapped again. So anytime he felt comfortable, like he was becoming a part of the group, he was scared that he wouldn't be able to leave without losing something important.
It was Takao's unrelenting forgiveness that made him notice there was a difference in not be able to leave, and never wanting to go.
60. Rejection
His best dreams and worst nightmares involved Takao. The nightmares were of death, and the reeking stench of blood, and accusing eyes. But even those couldn't compare to the dreams when all he saw was disgust in the blunette's face as he confessed.
So he kept silent, and never let anything show, because even though he knew his nightmares were just that, nightmares, he couldn't bring himself to say anything that might cause him to lose the greatest thing that had happened to him, ever.
61. Fairy Tale
"Seriously, what's with these Fairy Tale girls? Can't they save themselves? I mean, half of them got themselves into their situations because they're so damn stupid in the first place, you'd think the writers would allow them to redeem themselves by saving themselves. Don't you agree Kai?"
"You just said 'themselves' four times in the last minute."
"…Oh shut up."
62. Magic
"The magic's the only cool part of these stories. Wish we had magic."
"…We have spirits."
"Yeah I know, but I just think it'd be sweet to set someone on fire just by glaring at them. Then again, your glare is almost that potent. Heh."
"Hnn."
63. Do Not Disturb
He never saw the point of 'Do Not Disturb' signs; no-one ever paid attention to the damn things. It wasn't until Takao suggested a sock on the door that they stopped being interrupted.
Though he was eternally grateful for the universal sign, he wondered why a sock was chosen of all things.
Though he supposed it was better than his boxer shorts.
64. Multitasking
Book in one hand turning pages periodically (still with only one hand somehow), spoon in the other stirring the brownie mix for dessert tonight, not one drop spilling on the floor, managing to keep their two kids (and every once in a while, him) from sneaking tastes of it, roast in the oven that he knows won't burn, vegetables boiling in a pot but never boiling over, and a phone tucked between shoulder and ear as he chatted with Max.
Kai had never seen such extensive amounts of multitasking, ever, until he started living with Takao.
65. Horror
Crack of whips, blood oozing and spurting, screams of terror and bright hurt eyes. Even years later, the abbey haunted him.
Sometimes, in his worst moments, even Takao couldn't help him.
66. Traps
There were so many different kinds of traps in the world, and Kai had experienced many through his grandfather and the abbey. So many different ways to snare a person so successfully.
He supposed it was ironic that the one that never tried to trap him had succeeded, where his grandfather and many others had failed.
Then again, he'd never met a person like Takao before, and no one else had ever tried friendship and love.
67. Playing the Melody
It was haunting and memorable, sad and happy, heart-wrenching and beautiful. It was the first time he had ever heard Takao play the piano, he never knew the blunette had the skill.
It was pain and healing, abandonment and forgiveness, shackles and freedom.
It was their song.
68. Hero
He had scoffed at fantasy novels that depicted the valiant hero that managed to somehow save even the cruellest of villains. It was stupid and impossible for everyone to have a happy ending.
Then a blue-eyed, blue-haired, ignorant little child, had taken the hand of a drowning boy, and everything changed.
Because he had never considered the hero being a kid.
69. Annoyance
He was a childish, immature, annoying idiot, and yet he found himself drawn in more and more every day. Because behind the irritating behaviour, was the most fascinating person he had ever known.
70. 67 Percent
"Why can't I get the right number?"
"You're not entering it in your calculator correctly."
"Yes I am! See?"
"Takao, it's two-thirds, therefore, it's 66.66 percent, not 67."
"What difference should it make?"
"Because if you want an accurate answer in algebra, you can't round. Even the smallest decimal makes a difference. In fact, you really should use as many sixes as possible."
"… I freakin' hate math."
71. Obsession
It started as anger mixed with confusion and a need to know. Know how a pathetic headstrong beginner had managed to beat him. Know how an idiot had beaten him. It wasn't possible. He had to have cheated, but he hadn't.
It changed to curiosity, and a burning want to defeat him. Study him, his lifestyle, find what made him so good, and when he had collected enough information, leave and ponder over what he had learned.
Soon it was grudging respect. Never wanting to see him lose, because if he lost, he himself would look bad for losing to him before. Competition as well, the only one who could challenge him, make him work for what had just been handed to him before. Being given something he had never had before.
Then it was love, though never admitted. Tucked away in a small corner of his heart, and maybe always there but never realized until now. The one who could give him everything he had ever needed: a challenge, fun, and forgiveness. Unrelenting forgiveness that so long ago had had him reaching out his hand to a stranger who had done nothing but scoff at his talents and just him in general.
Then it was needing to see him every day, hurting when he didn't, knowing where he was every minute, angry when he didn't, knowing all his favourite foods and movies and how he'd always wanted a puppy, getting him said-puppy, training, the rush and exhilaration every time they battled or touched, the flip-flop of his stomach when he smiled or laughed, the pain when he cried, the pure desperation and need.
And he realized that the love he had always denied in his heart had quickly turned into obsession.
And there was nothing he could do about it.
72. Mischief Managed
"I would love to have a map like that."
"You don't need any help with your mischief."
"Nah, I was thinking it would make it easier to find you after you leave."
"...T-Takao."
"I'm not that stupid Kai, I know you're going again. And I wouldn't need a magic map if you would start telling me where you go."
"…"
"…"
"I'm sorry."
"I know. I just wish you would tell me so I could help."
"Some things... must be done alone."
"And those are usually the things that push someone to their limits. And that's when they need friends the most."
"I'll tell you..."
"Someday?"
"Yeah."
"...Good enough for me then."
73. I Can't
"Is it really that difficult?"
"I'm sorry Takao, I just… I can't."
"I know. It's just after all these years, I thought you would've figured it all out by now."
"It's not that I didn't. It's just that it's been so long, I thought…"
"You're an idiot. It doesn't matter how many years pass, I could wait for you all my life, and never stop loving you."
"…L-loving… me… Takao, how-?"
"It's love Kai, it's suppose to be boundless and never-ending right? So… Can't you stay?"
"Gou…"
"Oh for… It's not that difficult y'know. I have room enough for all of us and more. Kai… Please."
"…"
"I can wait forever Kai, I just… We only have so much time y'know? So if I don't have to spend one more minute without you, I don't want to."
"I have to go back to Russia… So, for now, I can't… But… I'll come back. I promise. As soon as-"
"As soon as you're ready… Well, I can live with that. Just… Don't take so long this time alright?"
"I promise."
74. Are You Challenging Me?
"Are you challenging me Takao?"
"Tch, when am I ever not?"
"True."
75. Mirror
Every morning from the time he met Takao, he would wake in the morning, and put on his face-paint with help of various mirrors, and never be able to look himself in the eyes.
It took many conversations and finally a calloused hand under his chin for him to finally look.
He still didn't like what he saw in his eyes, but everything in Takao's made up for it.
76. Broken Pieces
He started to notice that every time he left, his stomach felt on fire. With his levels of denial it took him a while to realize it was the shards of his heart shredding his insides. It was that same denial that made it take longer for him to realize why his heart was breaking.
77. Test
"Is this still good?"
"…"
"Well you should know, you made it… I think. I'm not too sure. It doesn't really look like anything."
"…"
"It's not a stupid statement! Just cause it doesn't look right doesn't mean it doesn't still taste right."
"…"
"Well, I'm gonna test it. If I die, then it's bad."
"…"
"I'm not throwing it out if it's still good Kai! Now… Let's see, here's a spoon and… Blech! Okay bad, very very very bad. Ewwww! Disgusting. I'm gonna gargle Draino, that would be better than this. Yuck!"
"… Idiot."
78. Drink
Glug glug glug.
"Yuck! Good chocolate milk, banish the gross taste of unknown food from my mouth! Eck, working, but still aftertastes. Blech. I need something stronger than milk."
"…I'm hiding the Draino."
"Screw you Kai!"
79. Starvation
"Kay, let's see: no food, water but damned if it doesn't look foul, no shelter, not much for firewood. Yeah we're screwed."
"…They'll come dig us out."
"Trapped in a little cave covered in snow and freezing to death, I hope they hurry up."
"…"
"Kai. I'm hungry."
"…"
"No really Kai, I'm freakin' starving. And cold, really really cold."
"…"
"Need to find some way to warm… up… Heh. Hey Kai?"
"…"
"Kaaaiiii."
"…What? Mmmph!"
"Mmm."
"Takao… W-what are you doing."
"I'm cold, and this is warm. I'm solving a problem. You can figure out the food problem later."
"…Yeah, later."
"Mmm."
80. Words
Unspoken apologies, and unspoken forgiveness, understanding without one utterance… They never needed words, because they could say so much more with their bodies.
So when he finally got up the nerve, he just kissed him. 'I love you.'
And he kissed back. 'I love you too.'
81. Pen and Paper
So many scribbles and crumpled paper and one pen out of ink already, and damn who would figure it would be so difficult to write a confession?
The pen is mightier than the sword… Maybe, but with him and Takao, swords, or in their case beyblades, often worked better.
Their next battle spoke more of his feelings than any words, because in their world, every star was ten times brighter and more beautiful as they spelt it out for him.
I love you.
82. Can You Hear Me?
Do you get what I'm saying?
Are you listening?
I'll always forgive you.
I'll always be here for you.
I'll wait as long as it takes.
I'll wait forever.
I love you.
I always will.
It took him years to finally hear what Takao had been telling him all along. And when he finally clued in, he was told one more thing:
Life is too short for regrets.
83. Heal
He left for one final time, and even though he knew he couldn't stay, his breaking heart told him he was making a big mistake.
He hurt for a long time after. A wound that never fully healed.
It ached all the more when he saw him again. Sharp pangs that he thought had mostly dissipated pulsed through him. He hadn't planned on seeing anyone, especially him. Especially when they both had children, and who knew what sort of life Takao had made… Without him.
He hoped it was happy, will someone who was full of the life and vivacity that made Takao such an amazing person. He hoped he had received everything he deserved, which was everything… He deserved anything and everything.
After their sons' beybattle, and theirs', when they were talking as they lay on the grass, he heard something he never expected to hear: "I just… Missed you, y'know? It was never really the same. And she… She knew. She knew she couldn't replace you, and she was fine with it. She was amazing, understanding and open and willing to stay with me despite… Well…"
"…Well?"
"…I still love you Kai."
And he felt every hurt he had ever had, the pain and guilt he had harboured for so long, instantly heal with those words.
84. Out Cold
It was the most frightening time of his life when Takao lay motionless in his lap.
'He'll wake up. He has too. And then he'll laugh it off, and everything will be fine again... He has to wake up... Wake up Takao. Wake up and smile at me. Please.'
85. Spiral
He often felt like he was spiralling out of control, and the only time his world stopped spinning and his feet were firmly planted was when he was with Takao.
Maybe it was his control over wind that overrode the swirls of chaos that had taken hold of him. Whatever it was, he never felt more in control of his future than with the blunette by his side.
86. Seeing Red
Takao told him once that he had never seen someone with such an amazing shade of colour in their eyes. But every time he looked in the mirror, all he saw was the bright red of blood, and betrayal, and an inherited evil that he just couldn't seem to escape.
87. Food
He had never met someone who could eat as much as Takao, it was nice to know after all the time that had passed, nothing had changed.
88. Pain
He wasn't a stranger to pain, but this was so foreign that he couldn't stop the hiss of pain as his muscles clenched.
He forced himself to relax. It was still uncomfortable, but the noises and the gasps from Takao above him were worth every minute of it.
89. Through The Fire
He spent his life building walls of bright blinding fire, so hot no one could walk through them and so high no one could climb them, enclosing himself and hiding away from the hurt and pain of life.
With wind and water, Takao not only flew over them, but every time he passed, more of the walls were quenched. Time after time he passed over and through the fires. When he was nothing else but himself, open and vulnerable, Takao protected him until he could handle the world alone. But when he could, and no longer needed Takao's help, he found he still couldn't let the blunette go.
90. Triangle
Takao asked him later why he didn't wear the face paint anymore, and after he kissed him softly, he murmured that he had no need to hide anything anymore.
91. Drowning
Falling, choking, water suffocating his lungs and he was drowning drowning drowning, losing, dying.
And a bright glowing hand grabbed his, saving him once more, and he could breathe again.
92. All That I Have
The blunette would've given him everything… Anything at all… All that he was… All that he had…
And that scared him so much - to know that there was nothing he could do that Takao wouldn't forgive him for - because he had never been given that kind of trust before.
93. Give Up
He had given up on his quest for power, on the abbey, on his grandfather, on becoming the best beyblader… He had given up on a lot of things.
Most things really.
But not Takao… Never Takao.
94. Last Hope
He never had much hope; he truly was a pessimist at heart. Meeting Takao gave him a belief for a future he didn't know he had, making the blunette his first, last, and only hope.
95. Advertisement
Unlike most people, Takao didn't buy things because advertising told him too. In fact, he seemed to avoid most things with strong persuading commercials, and just buy what he needed or wanted, regardless of other's thoughts.
He was different, that was for sure. Really, really different... But it wasn't a bad thing. Actually, it was useful when shopping, because the blunette was rarely distracted by useless things.
Unfortunately, this didn't pertain to food. So really, any time gained by not browsing, was lost in Takao's need for any tasty food that caught his eye.
96. In the Storm
He was fire, the embodiment of the phoenix he bladed with. He burned and smoked and flared.
He was fire, and fire was life.
But he never felt more exhilarated, more alive, had never felt anything like being in the wake of Takao's attacks.
And being inside the storm was like falling into the blunette's eyes.
97. Roses
Roses were the image of love. Bright red and beautiful.
But the red reminded him of blood and pain, and Takao liked irises better anyways.
98. Puzzle
"Here piecey, here piece piece piece piece piece."
"What are you doing?" He asked and he winced slightly as he saw Takao lift his head quickly and smash it against the underside of the table.
"Owww. Umm, looking for the last puzzle piece?" The blunette said.
"Did you try under the puzzle?"
"…" Takao sat there silently for a moment, then got up and slowly lifted the edge of the puzzle on the table. "Huh. Well I'll be damned." He said as he pulled a tiny piece from under the almost complete picture. Then placed it in the last empty slot. Turning the bluenette grinned at him, and his stomach flopped. "Thanks Kai!" Takao said as he admired his work. "Yay! All done!"
"…You're welcome."
Takao turned to him and hugged him. "Thanks sooo much. I was looking for that piece for… forever! Hey Maxie!" He shouted as he let Kai go and walked away to the kitchen. "Finished it!"
Whoops of glee met his ears as he stood in the living room and took a shaky breath.
It happened every time they touched... Another piece fitted into a slot in his heart. He was slowly completing his own puzzle, one he wasn't sure he wanted finished, because he didn't know what the final picture would be...
99. Solitude
He was often alone because he liked to be alone. But he was never more alone than when he was without Takao, and those were times he could do without. Because those times were, somehow strangely, too quiet.
100. Relaxation
Lying on his grassy hill, calm breeze ruffling his hair, and that of the blunette in his arms. Takao tilted his head up and gave him a small smile. He kissed him softly, languidly, and when Takao settled back into his embrace, nuzzling his neck, he felt every bone, every muscle, in his body relax.
He sighed at the perfection of sunny afternoons.
If you made it this far, I applaud you.
Anyways, let me know if there are errors. But kindly please, criticism is only worthwhile when constructive. Thank you.
Hope you enjoyed it.
