Prologue
Bella and Edward are happy together or so Bella thought and then Edward leaves suddenly and without saying a word. Bella is broken more than anyone knows more than she even realizes as time passes and as a new love interest appears will she be able to handle the changes. Edward comes back after 3 years but is Bella happy everything tells him she is. Then why outside her room did he hear her muffled sobs and her call his name. Is she really as happy as she seems and should he let her know he is back did she finally do what he always hoped she would has she moved on to a real human life?
Bella's POV
"Bella" Charlie said and looked over at me with a worried expression I hadn't been the same since he left. I slept for the first month cried the second and now I was what Charlie called a zombie. Maybe he was right I felt numb all over except for the huge rip in my in the middle of my chest where my heart should have been but it was ripped out and crushed three years ago. I couldn't breath sometimes the pain was to unbearable like right now was one of those times. I sighed how many times had he called my name this time I thought and then said "Yes, Dad sorry" I looked up from my school book I had my ipod earphones in so I lifted them up saying "I didn't hear you." I lied I wasn't listening to anything I was trying to think about nothing because I had to write a paper for English Lit class and I absolutely hated the topic: Romeo and Juliet. He once said as we were in high school that He envied Romeo. I thought it was because Juliet was so beautiful but that was not it He was said it was so easy for human to kill themselves. I had to wonder if it was so easy then why had I not been able too I guess in the first couple for months I hadn't had the courage and now three years later I still didn't. Charlie had wanted to send me to Renee in Florida but I refused to leave Charlie had thought it was because of him but it wasn't I really loved being with my dad I just wished he picked somewhere else to live. It was cold and rainy and green and so weird here in Forks Washington, I was used to dry dust I always lived with my mom in Arizona that had been so long ago now. I looked up and Charlie was starring at me so I took out one of my earphones and said "Dad did you ask me a question?" "Yes, Bells are you going out with Jake tonight?" "Yes Dad as soon as I get this paper semi done I have to turn it in on Monday. Why did Jake call?" "Yea, about twenty minutes ago asked if you were ready to go" "Ok I'll call when I am done" "OK" Charlie said going back to watching his sports channel. I finished the paper without to much more trouble and when upstairs into the bathroom looking in the mirror I said to the image I saw there "Boy do you need to get a life and your own place" I had thought about moving on campus I was attending the community college in Port Angeles which so only about a half an hours drive from Forks but I worried who would take care of Charlie that was a year and a half ago and now him and Sue Clearwater were dating and almost every night since then he would go to her house for supper just like he was later tonight. I knew he would now be ok I just had to break the news to him I would be leaving in a couple of weeks I already had a room mate lined up and I had a job waiting for me when the semester ended. I needed this I kept telling myself I needed to move on to be on my own so to speak to try to start breathing again it had been three years enough time I told myself but I really didn't believe it I would never be able to love someone else I was ruined completely. When I finally realized it I had decided to talk to Jacob he was my best friend but he loved me in a way I couldn't love him back, I need to fair to him and let him go, so he could find someone who would love him the way he needed to be loved. I was twenty-one years old it was time for me to grow up and to move on with my life no matter how hard it might be. By the time I got downstairs Jacob was in the living room talking to Charlie I smiled at him when he said "Hey, Bells you look beautiful tonight were are we going" "Twisted is that cool" "Heck yeah I love that place" "Great are you ready?" "Yep see you Charlie" Jacob said standing up and shaking Charlie's hand. I had met Jake through Sue when Charlie and her started dating I went for a dinner with them and Sue invited him to come also. We hit it off fine I always thought Jake was a great friend he knew my past I could talk to him about anything so I hoped I wouldn't loss that after tonight but only time would tell him. "Bye dad see you in the morning I guess" "OK Bella be careful tonight" "Thanks I will" I said walking out the door and getting into my truck and waiting for Jake to get in and he said "We could take my car this time you know" "Yeah but I like to drive so it's cool" Jacob was nineteen and every part of him loved to drive but I need my truck tonight just in case things didn't go as I hoped I would hate to have to call Charlie to come and get me in the police cruiser how completely pathetic do you have to be to be picked up outside a club by your dad in a cop car no less.
When we finally got there and when inside I ordered us two beers and we sat down at a table close to the dance floor and I smiled as Jake took a drink and looked at the dance floor then back at me and said "Hey do you want to dance" "Yeah why not" I said putting off the talk I need to have with him for a little longer. As we dance to some weird techno music I thought about what I was going to say when the song ended and we walked back over to the table I said "Jake I need to talk to you ok?" He looked at me and said "I am not going to like this am I?" I smiled a little smile and shook my head no and said "I need to be fair to you I need to stop being selfish. Jake I can't love you the way you love me don't misunderstand me I love you but like you would love a best friend and that is what you are to me Jake my best friend I need for you to understand I can't give my heart to you like you can to me because I don't have a heart to give it shattered into millions of different little pieces three years ago and I will never be able to put it back together." I stop and looked up at his sad eyes and continued "So I need to be fair and let you go to find someone who will love you the way you need to be love Jake" I looked at the floor and then up at him and he said "Bells, I understand but can you just try for me please" "Oh Jake I have been for the last year I have been trying I just cant and you have been more than patient I know your just dieing to kiss me but Jake I cant I am so sorry I thought I could but I cant and I also wanted to tell you I am moving to Port Angeles after the semester is over I am moving in the dorms with a roommate I need to try to start breathing again Jake and I cant do it here." "Have you told Charlie?" "No not yet" "Bella" He started I could tell he was trying to control his temper because when he turned around and looked at me his eyes were black as midnight and his voice was hard as steel when he said "Well I hope you have a nice life Bella" He started to walk away and I caught is arm and said "Jacob I am so very sorry I didn't do any of this on purpose you understand that right" "Whatever Bella I have to go" He spat angrily at me and I called to him "Jake wait please" "What the hell for Bella you already said I was not Edward so therefore you couldn't love me so forget it and let me go then" and he walked out the door he knew exactly what to say to kill me where I stood. I stumble back to the table and put some money on it for the drinks and left once I walked outside and got into my truck I couldn't hold the tears back anymore the rip in my chest was back and worse than ever so I laid over in the seat and cried until I thought I couldn't cry anymore I had lost the last bit of sun shine left in my life my Jacob he had once promised to never say his name but when I had made him angry enough he did it I hurt him so he hurt me back when I was finally able to drive home I drove slowly and when I finally did make it home it was after two in the morning and I walked in and went upstairs and called Jake and got his voice mail and asked him to call me I told him I was sorry again I wanted to make sure he had got home ok I laid down on the bed with my clothes from the club still on and I didn't care I just wanted to get away I just wanted to not feel the pain anymore so I cried myself to sleep and I dreamed of Edward once again he was standing in my room and I opened my eyes and saw him and said "Why? Why Edward why did you leave I need you! I can't breathe unless you're here. I feel like I am dead but I can't die. I feel like I can't breathe but I can. Where are you?" I woke up then screaming his name and started sobbing again when I realized that he wasn't there it was just a dream once again. I had dreamed of Him almost every night since he left what were once pleasant dreams turned to nightmares in the last three years. I tried but I couldn't go back to sleep and I looked over at my clock it read 7:30am. Charlie had gone fishing this weekend with some friends so the house was empty by now so I got up went downstairs and found that he had left me some coffee and I pour a cup and sat down and sighed. I was going to like not have to pretend to be happy for a while since no one was here but me I smiled despite my pain over losing Jake.
After I ate breakfast I pulled my ipod out of my backpack and turned it on and washed the dishes, straighten up the house, did all the laundry and when I was finally done I collapsed in to bed at 10pm I was exhausted I quickly fell asleep and like every other night I dreamt of Him I woke up with a scream lodged in my throat and I laid there sobbing like always I must have fallen asleep again because I woke up at one to the sound of Charlie coming in the house I sighed and rolled over and closed my eyes as my door opened he said "Bells you ok?" "Yeah dad I'm fine didn't sleep well that's all how was the trip?" "Ok got some fish" "cool" "Get some rest Bells I see you in the morning" "Yeah ok dad thanks" I fell asleep again and slept soundly until 5 the next morning I rolled out of bed and went to the bathroom and then walk into the kitchen Charlie was up and I said "Good Morning Dad" "Morning Bella did you sleep well last night" "Yeah I did I guess I just woke up. Hey dad I want to talk to you for a minute you have time" "Yeah sure what's up" "I am moving out in a couple of weeks I got a dorm room at school and I will be sharing with someone I also got a job waiting for me at a little book store by the school" "Really?" "Yeah I know Sue cooks for you most of the time and well dad I am really old enough to set out on my own and I am only 30 minutes away if you need me but dad I really need this" Charlie looked at me and then walked over and gave me a hug this was one of the few times where we actually touched we both felt strange about it but this time it was nice and then he said "I proud of you kiddo that takes a lot of courage what your doing I am glad you are trying to do something different" "Yeah I am really looking forward to it" "Good so when is the move date" "The week after school is out" "Alright well Bells I will miss you but I am happy for you and I need to go I have to be at the station early today" "OK I will miss you too dad but I will be good for me and be careful today" "I will see ya" "See ya" I said as he walked out the door.
Time flew by and before I knew it the first day of school was upon me. My roommate Amy and I were getting along great actually we were great friends and I was soon telling her about everything I had been through and we were taking most of the same classes so a couple of weeks after school started on Friday night as we were chillin on the couch in our dorm I said "Amy do you want to check out this club called Twisted I haven't been there since the thing with Jake but I could really use a night out" "Awesome let's see if Brandi and Shawn want to go with us" "Cool" Amy and I had a few classes with Brandi she was one of the few married students but she was still awesome to hang out with. Amy came back a few seconds later and said "Brandi said Shawn had to work but she would love to come she said she would meet us there in about an hour is that good with you" "Yea that's great" I said getting off the couch and getting ready and we were out the door in 30 minutes and on our way to the club once we arrived and got inside we found Brandi sitting at a table looking bored as this guys started talking to her she smiled politely at him and then said something and lifted her hand and then the guys walked off she then caught me looking at her and smiled sliding her small frame of the chair. She was a short little thing I think she was five foot and maybe weight 100 pounds soaking wet she had long black silky hair blueish green eyes and the sweetest smile and a heart of gold no wonder people were instantly drawn to her like I was and when she finally made it over to us she hugged me and said "Hey Bella how are you" "I am good Brandi! How is Shawn?" "Being a husband I guess" She laughed and hugged Amy and said "Hey did you know my parents are coming for Christmas they wanted to see you do you think you could come by the house then or are you going home?" "NO I will be there I am not going home Sarah and Beth are going to be in Hawaii with their husbands so I am just staying here mom said it was ok if I did want to come home" I sat down at the table and look on the dance floor I hadn't danced since Jake and I were here and I don't think I was going to tonight. I looked up and Amy and Brandi were sitting down when Brandi said "Bella I am so sorry that was really rude of me are you going to Charlie's for Christmas because if not I would love to have you come over to" "Oh Brandi you're the farthest thing from rude in the world I don't know what I am going to do yet but I will let you know ok" "Cool you girls want something to drink?" "Yeah beer please" I said and Amy shook her ahead then Brandi disappeared and a few minutes later came back with three Corona's "Ah perfect my favorite" I said smiling at her "Yeah mine to" she said with a little blush appeared on her face and I turned around and watched the different couple dance and after a couple more beers I was ready to dance so Amy went out on the floor with me and I laughed and said "why doesn't Brandi dance" Amy smiled and said "Hmm you don't want to see her dance by herself it is kinda embarrassing" "Can't be any worse than me" "Yes it can Shawn is the only one who can keep that in rhythm" Amy said laughing and after the song ended and we walked back to the table Brandi laughed and said "Amy told you my dirty little secret didn't she" I smile and she said "Yep I prefer to look like I know what I am doing and I cant if Shawn isn't here" I laughed again grabbed the next round of beers and turned to watch the floor again. I was about half way done with my drink when I noticed a wonderful smell in the air I cringed that smell reminded me of him and the rip in my heart busted opened and I down the last bit of my drink and said good night to Brandi and Amy and asked if Amy wanted to go but Brandi said she would drop her off and that I didn't look like I felt well at all and asked if I could make it home ok and I smiled and said "Yea I will be great I just need some air be careful you guys ok" After I said goodbye I walked out of the club and around the corner to my truck when I came face to face with the someone I hadn't thought of in three years and my heart skipped a beat. Victoria.
"Bella" she hissed "You look well I haven't had this pleasure in a while I have been stopped every time I try to get close to you finally I will get the revenge I have sought for so long" Maybe it was the beer in my systems that made me misunderstand what she said "Had she said something about being stopped every time she got close to me? I know now I had way to much to drink and I said "Victoria what are you doing here?" she smiled at me and said "Bella, I thought with all the classes you have been taking that you would have gotten a little smarter" "What" I asked and saw Victoria crouch in to an attack stance and I froze as she said "I am finally going to make Edward suffer as much as I have since he killed James" a sick smile crossed her face and I said "He wont suffer, he left, he didn't want me, he wont care what you do to me now he doesn't love me anyway" I said getting ready for her to pounce when I felt a breeze and a intoxicating and familiar scent fill the air and a angelic voice I would know anywhere and after three years say "Bella, Love you are very much mistaken" I was stunned because right behind Victoria stood Edward and I gasped and everything went black.
