A/N: I got the idea for this while trying to teach my daughter. Had loads of fun writing it too.

All characters are sole property of JKR, I write to learn.


Sometimes teaching a toddler can be a lot of fun. Ron and Hermione find that out for themselves when Hermione decides to teach a year and a half old Rose to speak their names after Rose had learned her own.

Day 1

Hermione: Sweetheart, what is your name baby?

Rose: Ose

Hermione *beams up at Ron: See? Now baby what is Dada's name?

Rose: Dada

*Ron chuckles and is shushed with a glare from his wife

Hermione: No baby, Dada's name is Ron

Rose: Lon?

*Ron swoops down to cuddle his daughter but is soon swatted off by his wife. 'No disturbing while I'm teaching her Ron!'

Hermione: That's very good honey. Now what is Mamma's name?

Rose: Mamma

Hermione *smiles at her little one: Yes that too. But Mamma's name is Her-my-o-nee (She articulates clearly)

Rose *Looks up with round eyes

Ron: You really expect her to be able to say that?!

Hermione: Ok, alright… Mamma's name is Mione

Rose: Mini

Hermione: Great! Now tell me, what is Dada's name?

Rose: Lon.

Hermione *claps: Yes! And what is your name?

Rose: Lon

Ron: Congratulations Sweetheart, Mission Confuse Rose is accomplished!

Hermione *groan

Day 2

10:00am

Hermione: Baby what is your name?

Rose: Lon

Hermione: What is Dada's name then?

Rose: Ose

Hermione: And Mamma's name?

Rose: Lon

2:00pm

Hermione: Let's do this again. Baby what is your name?

Rose: Ose

Hermione: Thank goodness! What is Mamma's name?

Rose: Ose

Hermione *wearily: And Dada's name?

Rose: Ose

6:00pm

Hermione: What is your name honey?

Rose: Lon

Hermione: Not again! What is Dada's name then?

Rose: Ose

Hermione: And Mamma's name?

Rose: Pig


*Pig: Pigwidgeon, Ron's Owl