Hey, guys! New fic! Actually, I wrote it special for my bestest best bestedy best bestest friend in the whole wide world's birthday. Happy birthday, softie! This one-shot is dedicated to you.
"Okay, we've finished spring cleaning on Naruto's apartment, Sakura's apartment, and my apartment. All that's left is your house, Sasuke," Kakashi smiled cheerfully under his mask.
"Sensei, how is cleaning our homes a direly important mission?" Naruto whined, lugging some flat cardboard boxes down the street, that were really starting to get on his nerves.
"It's not... you guys are just slobs! Bwa ha haa!" Kakashi laughed, slapping his knee as he cracked up. No one else laughed.
"Hey! My house was fine!" muttered Sakura darkly in a take-it-back-or-you-shall-feel-the-awesome-strength-of-haruno-sakura voice, dragging a broom and dustpan. In the background, Naruto growled, threw the boxes, and wrestled them on the ground.
"True," Kakashi said.
"-hiss- STUPID CARDBOARD!!"
"Naruto's house was the worst. All the ramen," the silver-haired man shuddered, "And why did you have a punching bag that looked like me? That was very worn with use?"
"Uh... I just hope Sasuke's neat!" Naruto nervous-laughed, wiped at the newly-acquired scratches all over his face, kicked the boxes one last time (they put up a good fight, huh?) and walked faster to stand alongside his teammate. Way to avoid a question, Naruto. Bravo.
"Please tell me you're neat," Naruto begged, throwing an arm across Sasuke's shoulders.
"Don't touch me."
They all reached the Uchiha compound.
Feeling really awkward, Sasuke unlocked the door and led them into his very messy house.
"AWW!!" Naruto moaned, "Sensei, do we have to?"
Kakashi had left. Very quietly. That's how messy it was.
"HE DITCHED US!! HE DITCHED US!!"
"Calm down, Naruto. We're friends - we help each other. Come on, let's get to work," Sakura said, putting a hand on Naruto's shoulder.
"Sure thing, Sakura!" Naruto said, instantly cheerful, "Let's do this!!" (what?) He ran off to find a corner as Sakura pulled out a drawer. Sasuke sighed and claimed his underwear drawer, before someone else got to it first.
An hour later, he had to admit, his house was looking good and his dignity had so far remained intact (yup, it even survived a close call where Naruto started folding laundry and attempted to do the boxers right next to Sakura; Sasuke managed to tackle him to the floor before it was too late.)
Sasuke wrenched open a new drawer and started throwing things into the piles they had set up. The last thing in the drawer was one of his blue shirts. He fished it out and prepared to put it in the 'keep' pile, wondering why it had been stuffed at the bottom of that drawer. He found his answer; there were about three or so holes in it. He shrugged. He couldn't really wear it anymore, but it wasn't bad enough to throw away.
"Hey, anyone want this shirt?" he called holding it up.
Naruto poked his head around the corner, "No way! I don't want your gross, old shirt!" he yelled, immaturely putting a finger down his throat and gagging. Sasuke rolled his eyes.
"I'll take it," said Sakura, getting up out of the corner of the room she was arranging scrolls and books in.
Naruto and Sasuke looked at her blankly, "Why?" Naruto grabbed the shirt and held it up, "It's too big for you."
Sakura shrugged, "I was thinking I could wear it as pajamas. I like wearing shirts that are too big for me to bed, and I was actually looking for a new one recently." She folded the shirt neatly and put it on the bed.
"I mean, if it's okay with you," she added after one look at Sasuke's face.
'What the hell? Why does she want my shirt? Omigod, it's not for a shrine or something? She used to be a fan girl. What, is she going to sleep in it because it's like the next best thing or something? Is she going to use as a scent for dogs to find me with?!Holy crap! Is she going to clone me?! No, don't be stupid, Sasuke. (seriously, 'clone'?) She's over that. Actually, Sakura's been kind of ignoring you lately, so it's probably fine. Just give her the damn shirt and forget about it.'
Sasuke looked into her eyes, searching for signs of her former craziness, or giveaways to some secret plan involving incense. Finding nothing, he sighed.
"Whatever. Just take it."
"Thank you, Sasuke-kun!" she smiled up at him brilliantly.
Naruto rolled his eyes, "Whatever. Let's just hurry up and finish before, gee, midnight?"
A few hours later (but yeah, before midnight) they finally finished, gathered up the cleaning supplies, and said goodbye. (yeah, no thanks to Kakashi… ditcher)
Sasuke couldn't help it; he started getting all paranoid again when Sakura left with the shirt.
'Dammit! Leave it alone, Sasuke. Stop it... stop it. Don't do it, Sasuke, don't do it.'
Two minutes and fifteen seconds later he was trailing Sakura. She walked briskly along the street, ignoring wolf-whistles from drunken men outside the bars, seeing as it was getting dark. Sasuke jumped from bush to tree to pole outside a tavern, to go-kart (?), masking his chakra.
She wasn't stopping anywhere. Sasuke kept following her, and sensed a few people behind him. He stopped and turned around.
About five guys were standing behind him, glaring, "What are you doing, following our girl Sakura?" one of them shouted out obnoxiously. Sasuke smirked. Oh, yeah, Sakura's fan club. Hey, they'd gotten older, right? More mature? Heh, these guys weren't even ninja.
"Well, punk, what's your answer? Or should we beat it out of you?" the leader yelled, smacking his fist into the palm of his hand enthusiastically. Oooo, scary.
Two more minutes and fifteen seconds and five crap-beaten-out-of-them guys later, Sasuke jumped in the tree just outside Sakura's home as she unlocked the door and walked inside.
'This had better not take long.'
-one hour later-
'DAMN! How long is this going to take?! Does she even sleep?' he thought, looking tiredly through the lit-up windows from his tree. Boring. Sasuke blinked his eyes tiredly and smoothed out his messed up hair. He tensed. Someone was coming. He jumped higher into the tree right between a bunch of scratchy, leafy branches.
He watched Yamanako Ino walk up and let herself in. Sasuke watched through the windows, bored again, as they laughed and hugged and talked in the living room. Suddenly the door banged open.
"Sure we can practice chakra control for the mission tomorrow, Ino-chan," Sakura said, walking outside, "This tree is perfect."
'CRAP!!'
"I don't know, Sakura-chan. Walking on water exercises are more fun," Ino giggled, "If you know what I mean."
Sakura smiled and rolled her eyes, "You just like seeing Shikamaru with his shirt off."
"You're damn right. Seeing Choji kinda evens out the pleasure thing, though," Ino shuddered, "What about your team?" she asked, "Naruto's pretty good looking. And THE Sasuke," she teased, bumping Sakura's hip with her own.
"We've actually never done that drill together," Sakura said casually.
"Fun sucker."
"Ino-chan, you're just boy-crazy."
"You're damn right."
"Is that your new weekly catch-phrase?"
"You're damn right."
"Uh huh."
Sasuke tailed them as the two girls set off in the moon light to the Nakano River. He was almost too tired to have a nosebleed, but not quite tired enough, and literally paid for his spying in blood (fyi, they have bathing suits, okay? Sasuke's no perv… unless I decide to make him one.)
Pinching his nose, Sasuke followed Sakura back to her house. Finally, she got ready for bed. Sasuke watched as she did normal stuff like brush her teeth and wash her face. She came out of the closet wearing the blue shirt. He watched from his tree again as she got in bed and fell asleep. Wow, boring. You know, aside from watching Sakura train in a bathing suit and then watch her sleep in just his shirt. Why was it he never did reconnaissance work again?
After another half hour, he fell asleep too.
"What are you doing?"
"AARGHH!!"
Sasuke screamed and fell out of the tree.
It was only about an hour after he'd fallen asleep, and Sakura was sitting on the tree branch beside him, asking him what the hell he was doing.
"Uh, Sasuke?" Sakura asked, jumping out of the tree and landing in front of him.
The Uchiha groaned and looked up at her concerned face, wide, green eyes staring at him and slightly messy pink hair as her face glowed softly in the moonlight. Wow, she really was pretty. He shook his head. Cut it out.
Sasuke flushed slightly and jumped to his feet.
"Uh… uh…" he started backing away from her nervously.
Sakura looked at him questioningly. "Uh?"
"LEMONS!!" he blurted and made a run for it.
" 'Lemons'? What kind of retard are you?"
Poor Sasuke.
Hope you enjoyed that; happy birthday, Laurie; and please read and review! I've got birthday cake!!
