In Service of a Vision
Disclaimer: Kyou Kara Maou is the property of creator Tomo Takabayashi and licensor Geneon Entertainment, Inc.
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There was no greater challenge that Cheri von Spitzweg faced as the Maou than leading her kingdom through the aftermath of Suzanna Julia's death. Knowing that Julia's death was Shinou's will and that they would one day see her again in another form was of little comfort to the people of Shin Makoku. Even Conrart, the person who Cheri had always counted on to be the steadfast anchor in her life, was forever changed. He had returned from Rutenberg barely alive and, when he had found out that Julia had been lost to them, Cheri had feared that she might lose him, as well.
There were days when Cheri wanted nothing more than to retire to her room and weep for what she had lost and for what she had allowed to happen, but she knew that she couldn't. If there was one thing that Cheri had known about Julia, it was that she would never have wanted that for her.
So Cheri continued being her playful self; if possible, she was even more gregarious and brazen than ever before. She knew that some people found such mannerisms unbecoming for someone such as the Maou; but that was who she was, and she was proud of that. All that she wanted was to cheer everyone up; to make them forget, even for a moment, the tragedy that had befallen their country. Maybe she couldn't make it so that things were different, but this was one gift that she could give her people.
This tended to make meetings with her advisors very interesting; and never was this more the case then when the advisor happened to be Gwendal.
"Gwen!" Cheri exclaimed, bouncing up from her throne and hurrying over to where her eldest son stood before her, "you look so handsome today! Have you been using that special, scented shampoo I recommended?" She slipped her arm through his and leaned heavily against him, ignoring Gwendal's discomfited squirming as she did so. "It's good for the libido," she added, giving Gwendal a saucy wink.
"Mother," Gwendal scolded as he extracted his arm from her grip, "must you insist upon greeting me in such a manner?"
Cheri stuck her index finger in the air in front of her son's face and shook it emphatically. "Now, Gwen, if you worry too much you'll get even more wrinkles," she cooed, giving his cheek a pinch for good measure.
"Mother!" Gwendal said, a nearly imperceptible flush rising on his face as the guards were heard snickering just a bit. He sighed, apparently resigning himself to being toyed with yet again.
Cheri flashed Gwendal a charming smile. Her sons might be proficient with swords, but they had never once bested her in this manner of combat.
"Mother, I have come because we are having some…difficulties with the healers," Gwendal said as he escorted his mother back to her throne.
"Oh?" Cheri asked as she sat down and cradled her chin in her hand. "A bit lacking in their knowledge of anatomy, are they?"
Gwendal gave a soft grunt, but then continued as if he hadn't heard her. "It seems that they are taking Lady von Wincott's death particularly hard. The newly appointed leader is having a difficult time getting them to follow instructions."
"Oh, really? Gisela is?" Cheri sat up a little straighter, somewhat surprised by this news. She had known Gisela since Julia had taken her as an apprentice, which was very shortly after Günter had adopted her. Cheri didn't know Gisela as well as Julia did, but Julia had spoken very highly of her; both of her healing capabilities and her leadership.
Cheri fought the urge to frown. Gisela and Julia were quite close; they might have been lovers if not for Julia's relationship with Adelbert von Grantz. More than likely, whatever was troubling Gisela had something to do with Julia's death. It made Cheri feel…responsible, in a way.
Well, there was only one thing to do – Cheri would have to take Gisela under her wing and help her in whatever way she could. It was the least that she could do to honor Julia's memory. Not to mention that Gisela had grown into a lovely young woman, with a butt to die for. And by time Cheri was through, she'd have an attitude to match.
"Not to worry, Gwen dear," Cheri announced. "I'll personally see to it that this issue is addressed."
Gwendal swallowed nervously, in a way that Cheri always found so completely adorable. "Personally?" he asked tensely.
"Personally," she replied, a winning smile on her face. "Not to worry, darling, Mother will take care of everything."
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Gisela never thought all that much of the current Maou. Lady Cheri was a lovely hostess and friendly enough, but she wasn't what Gisela would call "leadership material." Still, she had, presumably, been chosen by Shinou for a reason; and there was the not insignificant fact that Julia had believed in Lady Cheri. Gisela didn't understand why Julia had so much respect for the Maou, because whenever she asked, Julia would simply smile and say that faith is as easy as you allow it to be. So Gisela, and many others, had respected Lady Cheri for the simple reason that they loved Julia.
Since Julia's death, though, Lady Cheri had changed, in Gisela's eyes, from a misguided yet well intentioned woman to the cause of the downfall of their country. No matter how pure her intentions, Lady Cheri had allowed Julia to die, and now everything felt constricting and oppressive. The kingdom that had once shone so brightly was dark; and the art of healing, in which Gisela had once been able to seek solace and peace, was now only a painful reminder of what she had lost.
Gisela was a failure at leading her fellow healers. She had tried to be fair and compassionate, but had found that the healers didn't want a replacement for Julia; they wanted Julia. And that was something that, no matter how Gisela wished that she could give that to them, she simply wasn't able to. The healers didn't believe in her, and that meant that they didn't listen to her. If something didn't change soon, Gisela was worried that Lord von Voltaire would assign someone else to her duties, and Gisela did not want to shame Julia's memory in that way.
So here she sat, going over the requests on her desk for what must have been the fifth time, trying to figure out which healer she was going to assign to which patient and hoping that her supervisees would be more receptive to her orders this time. It was early and she'd much rather still be in her bed, but Gisela was determined that she would find a way to manage this situation.
"Gisela!" called a voice from the doorway of her office. "Good morning, sweetie!"
Gisela looked over to the door, shocked to see Her Majesty standing there. She had never figured Lady Cheri for an early riser, let alone someone who would make the effort to look so perfect at this hour of the morning. And yet there she stood, her hair flowing down her back and her makeup flawless, her black dress hugging her curves in all the right places.
Then again, when did Lady Cheri not look perfect? Gisela couldn't help but feel underdressed, in her nightgown and a threadbare yet extremely comfortable robe, her hair still disheveled from sleep.
Gisela rose, and bowed respectfully to the Maou. "Yes, Your Majesty? How might I be of service?" she asked.
Cheri crossed the room in a few casual strides and placed a finger under Gisela's chin, forcing her to lift her head until their eyes met. "There's no need for such formality among friends, my dear," Cheri said, not removing her finger from Gisela's chin.
"Friends?" Gisela asked. She did not look away from Cheri; she had only been trying to show the proper respect by bowing, but she would be damned if she would avert her eyes from anyone.
"Yes, friends! Surely, the concept is not foreign to such a beautiful woman," Cheri said breathily, making no move to step back. "And my friends," she purred, "call me Cheri." The finger that was still resting under Gisela's chin moved to trace along her jawline before retracting with a playful swipe.
Gisela took a step backwards, trying to get a bit of personal space – something which Lady Cheri seemed to have no concept of. "Thank you..." Gisela offered, somehow not able to manage calling the Maou by her first name.
Cheri smiled warmly. "Well, now that we're friends, I'd love it if you'd join me for dinner tonight."
Gisela blinked, not having expected that. "I…I don't…"
"So it's settled, then," Cheri interrupted, never one to wait for an answer. "Six o'clock, sharp! See you tonight," Cheri said as she turned and left, a relaxed sway in her hips. She looked over her shoulder and gave one last delicate wave before she disappeared into the corridor, her fingers slowly curling into her palm in a manner that was both casual and utterly deliberate.
Gisela stared after the Maou, wondering what in the world had just happened. Had she been issuing an order, or an invitation…with someone like Cheri, it was often difficult to tell the difference.
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If there was one thing that Lady Cheri excelled at, it was keeping her advisors on their toes. Whether they were planning her elaborate parties with only a day's notice, or trying to fend off her boredom long enough to explain a tactical situation, or just trying to fend her off, Günter and the rest of the staff certainly had their work cut out for them. And that was on a quiet day – the more…exciting ones were a different matter altogether.
Today, for good or ill, was one of the latter. Each time Günter began to hope that things were finally beginning to calm down after the war, some situation or another would crop up again and send everyone into a fit. Most recently, it was a group of humans who were reported to be lurking around the city. Their intentions were unknown as of yet, but Günter suspected that they weren't planning to invite the Maou for tea and dumplings. All of Gwendal's information was pointing to the fact that they were survivors from the war, and that meant that they probably had their sights set on only one thing: revenge.
Lady Cheri had been informed of this, of course. Her response had been to nod gravely and order that security be increased, and then to wink and suggest that Günter might try seducing the humans' ringleader in order to "pump him for information." Günter strongly suspected that she had thrown that last bit in because she enjoyed seeing Gwendal blush, which was something that Günter could hardly disagree with. It was just like Lady Cheri to try and diffuse a tense situation with a joke or two.
Unfortunately, things seemed to be deteriorating by the hour; this latest communiqué that Günter had only just received was no joke at all. Unless something drastic changed very soon, the potential for an attack on Covenant Castle was very high. Defending the castle would be no problem at all; it was designed specifically to protect the Maou. More the issue was that the chances of civilian casualties were high – if the attack didn't cause injuries, the subsequent panic surely would. And the infirmaries...or, more specifically, the healers...were in no shape to manage a crisis of that nature right now.
Günter was proud of his daughter for taking on the job of leading the healers, but things were not going well for her. The healers had not accepted her as their leader, and Günter knew exactly why…it was because Gisela was trying to be someone who she was not. Gisela was trying too hard to replace Julia, both for those under her command and for herself, and it was backfiring horribly. One of the many things that Günter had learned during the course of his life was that people responded to a contrived persona with anything but acceptance, no matter how good the intention behind it.
And that was why, as Günter stood before Gisela and informed her of the potential threat of attack, he was far more concerned about her mental state than her healing abilities.
"I understand," Gisela said with a curt nod. Günter could see that her determination was laced with wariness.
"Then I'll wait for your report on your preparations this evening," Günter said, his tone entirely official even though he wanted to be more compassionate. But Gisela had insisted, when she first joined the service, that he treat her as a subordinate rather than a family member, and Günter respected that. It was for that reason that he had not approached her about her reaction to Julia's death.
"Certainly, I'll have it to you after dinner," Gisela acknowledged.
Günter paused, a bit startled. Gisela usually spent the dinner hour locked away in her office doing paperwork or working in whichever ward of the infirmary happened to be short-handed. "Dinner?"
"Yes," Gisela replied, "with Her Majesty."
"I…see," Günter replied, trying to hide his surprise. Although Gisela had been appropriately respectful in her dealings with the Maou, she had never been especially fond of Lady Cheri; and since Julia's death, Gisela's opinion of Cheri had lowered dramatically. Sharing a meal together was probably not something Gisela would agree to easily.
However, knowing Lady Cheri as he did, Günter suspected that she probably hadn't given Gisela a chance to say no.
"Very well, then I'll expect your report after dinner," Günter revised, keeping his amusement well hidden. Gisela nodded her assent, giving no indication what she thought about her dinner plans.
As Günter left Gisela's office, he couldn't help smiling. If there was any time to be concerned about his daughter's innocence, this was probably it – but, although Lady Cheri might not be the most reliable person when it came to military strategy, but she was kindhearted and nurturing and, above all, genuine. If anyone should show Gisela the value in being true to yourself, it was Lady Cheri.
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Even though Gisela had no idea what to expect from dinner with Cheri, she still managed to be surprised. Rather than the long, formal dining table adorned with branching candelabras that she had assumed they would be sitting at, Cheri had presented her with an intimate table for two, set with casual but tasteful decorations. A single candlestick sat in the center, providing a dim and romantic glow.
All right, she had expected that much. Cheri's reputation was common knowledge in the castle, and so Gisela hadn't thought for a moment that she'd be dining in any sort of decent lighting.
The thing that Cheri's reputation had neglected to mention was how effortlessly she could make someone feel comfortable. Gisela wasn't sure if it was the excellent food or the red wine or the way that Cheri's eyes glinted in the candlelight, but she felt more relaxed than she could recall being since…in quite awhile. Gisela inhaled heavily, feeling the tension flow from her muscles as a pleasant scent engulfed her.
"Oh, you've noticed my perfume?" Cheri asked. She gazed at Gisela across the table, her chin resting on the back of her slender wrist, looking every bit as lovely as she had that morning. More so, actually, because there was something about the candlelight or the atmosphere or the moonlight in the window that made Cheri more alluring than Gisela could ever remember seeing her.
"It's lovely," Gisela said, feeling a bit off balance. She didn't normally appreciate perfume, but this one was…nice. Gisela's mind swam with a thick feeling, whispering to her that it was okay to relax and let herself be free.
Cheri favored Gisela with a wink and an impish smile. "It's lavender; my own special concoction. I only wear it on special occasions." Gisela swallowed as she looked into Cheri's eyes and felt as if they were drinking her in. Everything from Cheri's graceful neckline to her casual yet elegant poise was just so lovely, so entrancing. It made her feel...at ease, yet lacking. Knowing that there was something she wanted, a hunger that no amount of food could satiate. She hadn't felt this way in a long time.
Gisela blinked, realizing what she was thinking, and how wrong it was. It was wrong of her to feel this way, to have this appealing feeling of desire inside her when Julia was lost.
"If I might ask, Lady Cheri, why did you invite me for dinner?" Gisela blurted out. She was briefly embarrassed by her statement, but forced herself to hold Cheri's gaze and wait for her answer. As of yet, they hadn't spoken about anything of importance, and although she wouldn't put it past Cheri to invite her to dinner simply for small talk, if there was a larger reason for the invitation she wanted to know about it.
Cheri smiled that bewitching smile. "Because I would love to get to know one another better."
"Forgive me, Lady Cheri, but...why now? I've been a healer for nearly 40 years of your reign."
"Well, it's never too late to remedy old mistakes, my dear."
Gisela's body tensed at Cheri's words. "Sometimes it is," she said softly, knowing that her eyes revealed more than she wished, yet unable to look away from Cheri.
Cheri's grin faded into a wistful half-smile. "No, it's not. It's never too late as long as we're here. It's simply a matter of being strong enough to move forward." Gisela almost choked as she saw the light change in Cheri's eyes - she had seen a similar look too many times in her vanity mirror to mistake it for anything other than what it was. The difference between Cheri's eyes and those in her reflection was small, nearly imperceptible...but it also meant everything.
"I see," Gisela said, her voice firm and hard as she swallowed the flood of emotions that was threatening to surface.
Cheri's smile vanished, and her eyes filled with sympathy. "Oh...I'm sorry, dear. I didn't mean..."
Gisela looked away as she abruptly stood; she didn't need anyone's pity, and she needed it least of all from the Maou. "I should return to my duties; I have reports to prepare. Thank you for the meal, Your Majesty."
With that, Gisela took her leave, trying to ignore the way her head swam with heady sensations that made her want to forget - forget everything and give in to that feeling of longing that was forcing its way into her. She couldn't forget; she didn't want to forget. She wanted to feel that pain...it was all that she had left. What she did want to forget was the look in Lady Cheri's eyes as she had spoken about being "strong enough." It wasn't right that Cheri felt that pain too, and yet was able to go on and be happy and flirtatious all the same. It just wasn't fair.
It had been so much easier to think of Cheri as a bimbo who cared about nothing but her next escapade. It was easier to hate her for her indifference than to accept that she had that same pain, but was able to rise above it. It wasn't fair that she was strong enough, and Gisela wasn't.
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Gisela stood before the assembled group of healers, trying, for the third time that morning, to get everyone to quiet down and listen to her orders.
"Please, everyone! I only need a few moments," she called out, biting back her temper. Were she not focusing so intently upon keeping her anger at bay, she might have gotten a bit frightening by this point…but she knew that wouldn't do at all. Julia never lost her temper, not ever.
She waited a few moments, but the constant murmur of voices did not quiet in the slightest. "Everyone!" Gisela tried again, "please, I have urgent news! There have been rumors that the humans may be planning to attack the castle, and we must be ready to handle any casualties."
At that, the group did fall silent, but they also turned to glare at her; some in annoyance, and some with outright contempt. Then, they all seemed to speak at once.
"Why should we help?"
"I never agreed with the war, why am I being forced into it?"
"How many more of us will be sacrificed for Her Majesty's cause?"
Gisela sighed; she'd heard all of these arguments countless times in the last months. And the worst part was that she couldn't find it within herself to counter them…she'd even said some of those same things to herself. Gisela felt an odd sense of guilt rush through her as she remembered that. Lady Cheri had made some mistakes, but she felt that pain as much as any of them. Gisela had seen it, only last evening. And Cheri had been so beautiful, even with that hurt in her eyes; she had held her head up with dignity rather that let that pain bring her down.
Part of Gisela wanted to give the healers a healthy lecture on how things weren't always as black and white as the gossip made them seem. But the rest of her, the part that was always in the back of her mind, reminding her that Julia was gone and that it was Gisela's responsibility to act in her stead, convinced her to remain silent.
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Cheri turned to one side, admiring her profile in the wall of full-length mirrors. Anissina had really outdone herself this time; this outfit was nothing short of amazing. Everything was perfect, from the way the red leather hugged her curves like a second skin, to the way the hem of the cape billowed around her hips, to the black choker that was just the perfect final touch. Even the way that the red of the mask perfectly complimented her green eyes!
She wasn't surprised that Anissina's design also included thigh-high red boots and showed a substantial amount of cleavage – they often saw eye to eye in matters such as this. After all, what was the point of a battle outfit if one had to look frumpy in it? As far as Cheri was concerned, strength and beauty were two halves of the same whole; like berries and cream, they complimented each other perfectly.
Julia had taught her that.
Cheri sighed, remembering what had happened during dinner last night. She should have known better than to try and use her special perfume to make Gisela relax; all it had done was confuse her and bring up feelings that she wasn't ready to cope with. Instead of putting her at ease, the perfume had made Gisela even more uncomfortable.
"Voilà!" Anissina exclaimed, standing and gesturing to the mirror with a flourish. "What do you think?"
Cheri blinked, bringing herself out of her heavy thoughts. "Oh! Yes, it's wonderful! What do you call it?"
Anissina smirked at Cheri's reflection. "'Enemy-Of-Chauvinist-Men-On-A-Power-Trip-kun.' Long overdue, wouldn't you say?"
Cheri giggled a bit and she twirled around girlishly, admiring every inch of herself. "I can't argue with that. Although some of those men are rather intriguing…"
Anissina scoffed. "That doesn't mean they still couldn't stand to be punished."
"How true." Cheri didn't understand why a woman as sensual and captivating as Anissina was so down on men, but she could at least appreciate the sentiment that a strong woman was indeed a positive thing. Cheri much preferred to be leading a handsome paramour by the arm rather than at the helm of some machine made to torture said unsuspecting man, but she supposed that either way got the message across nicely. Anissina simply preferred a more...direct method of proving her point.
Cheri couldn't help chuckling to herself; it seemed that her eldest son would have his hands full for the foreseeable future.
Anissina placed a finger to her pursed lips in a pensive expression as she studied Cheri's reflection. "Hmm…it's missing something," she decided. After a moment's consideration, Anissina's face lit up and she gave a sharp snap of her fingers, and then rushed over to a nearby storage cabinet. After a few minutes of rummaging, she made a triumphant noise and hurried back to Cheri, handing her a long, black object and nodding at her appreciatively. "There! Perfect," Anissina declared with a grin.
Cheri looked down at the single-tailed whip she now held. "And what do you call this?" she asked cheekily, unable to resist.
"'Stop-Asking-Stupid-Questions-Or-I'll-Shove-It-Up-Your-Ass-kun.'"
Cheri laughed a bit, not knowing whether it was a joke but intrigued all the same. "Really?"
"No. Now what's bothering you?" Anissina asked. She reached down and fingered the hem of Cheri's cape, examining it for loose threads.
Cheri sighed at her reflection. "You won't happen to have anything in your workroom that can cure a broken heart, would you?"
Anissina looked up at Cheri, her expression somewhere between a glare and a snicker. "I don't have a cure for insanity, no. But I do have some gags, that may at least help with the symptoms…"
"Not with this one. She needs to talk more, not less." Cheri remembered how Gisela had closed off completely when Cheri had mentioned it never being too late to fix things. She hadn't intended to force the subject; she was merely going with the flow, as she always did - but apparently it had been ill-timed.
"Am I to understand that dinner didn't go as well has you had hoped?" Anissina knelt down and pulled out the needle that was tucked behind her ear, and then began to stitch up a piece of the cape that had unraveled a bit.
"It was…fine. Cordial, stiff, and utterly unproductive, but fine. I wonder if I might be the wrong person to help her through this…"
Anissina made a disapproving noise, but didn't pause in her stitching. "Nonsense. Gisela is a lovely girl, but she needs to see that her perpetual mourning does nothing but dishonor Julia's memory. Julia was able to stand by her beliefs to the very end, and we should be proud of her."
Cheri nodded her assent. "I am. But not everyone is able to see it that way. Gisela is afraid that if she lets go of her pain, it means that she will forget Julia."
"Then you'll just have to show her how not to let fear control you." Anissina wound a knot in the thread and stepped back, examining her work with an pleased look.
"So, I guess the correct question is, do you have anything that will help Gisela to find her confidence again?" Cheri asked.
Anissina smirked. "Of course I do. You're wearing it."
Cheri was about to give Anissina a grateful grin and thank her for all her help when she heard shouting outside. She rushed to the open window, her whip falling to the floor as she saw smoke wafting upwards, coming from the outer wall of the Castle.
The door slammed open behind her, and she turned - a messenger stumbled into the room, hunched over as he panted for breath. "Your Majesty," he addressed her gravely, "the humans have attacked."
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Gisela had never felt so helpless in all her life. She couldn't catch her breath, couldn't do anything but watch in horror as stretcher after stretcher came into the infirmary carrying Mazoku and human alike, their bodies burned and broken. She had tried to organize the healers, to prepare them for this, to spread them out among the injured - but they hadn't listened. There were too many patients and too few healers, and no matter what order she gave or how loudly she shouted it, her healers were ignoring the humans in favor of healing the Mazoku.
She knelt at the bedside of one of the more severely injured human soldiers, her hands glowing with healing power as she tried to focus on the task of saving his life. But there were so many human casualties, and if she went one by one, she would never save them all in time. She had to do something; she had to save them.
Gisela took a deep breath, trying to keep her desperation at bay. She reached out and grabbed a passing healer by the shoulder. "You must treat this man," Gisela ordered, trying to keep her voice steady and calm as she pointed at a man who had just come in and had burns all over his body. "He won't live long without treatment."
The healer shrugged out of her grip. "Let the humans treat themselves," he spat, his tone rife with bitterness. Then he was gone, moving to the end of the infirmary where his countrymen were being taken, barely sparing a glance at the rows of beds that held the human soldiers.
Gisela looked around frantically, at the patients who all needed her help. If she kept on at the pace she was going, she'd never make it in time and they would all die, all these people that she had sworn to protect - the people Julia had died to protect. She couldn't let that happen. But what could she possibly do, all on her own?
The answer came to her so simply, and Gisela wondered why she hadn't thought of it before. There was only one thing she could do.
Focusing her magic was easier than she thought it would be, because she was calmed by the knowledge that all the pain would soon be gone. There was no room in her mind for doubt or regret...this was the only way. Perhaps she would provide a better example for her healers in death than she had in life.
Perhaps...she could see Julia again.
"Gisela!"
Her eyes snapped open at the sound of a familiar voice, one that disrupted her concentration enough to give her pause. Gisela looked to the entrance of the infirmary and saw Lady Cheri standing in the doorway, silhouetted by the sunlight that streamed in all around her. She looked like an angel...how fitting. Gisela couldn't see Cheri's face, but she imagined the proud smile that she knew must be there, letting Gisela know that her sacrifice would be remembered as an act of honor.
The illusion faded as Cheri took a few steps into the room, and the light behind her faded enough for Gisela to see the look in her eyes. Gisela blinked as she recognized that Cheri's expression was not one of pride, but one of fear and shock.
"Guards, hold her!" Cheri shouted, pointing at Gisela.
To Gisela, the words sounded far away, and it took a short moment for her to understand what Cheri was doing...that Cheri intended to stop her. Her concentration was broken as her arms were grabbed and held by one of Cheri's guards. She fought back, trying to twist her way out of his grip. "What are you doing?" she shouted. "No! Let me do this...I have to do this!" Gisela struggled against the guard, but it was no use. She stilled herself and shut her eyes again, trying to concentrate over the noise and confusion in the room so she could use her magic regardless...
"Knock her unconscious if you must!" Cheri ordered, "but do not allow her to exhaust her magic!"
Gisela opened her eyes and glared at Cheri, an overwhelming feeling of bitterness consuming her. It wasn't fair - Cheri had found her peace, and yet she sought to keep Gisela from hers. "Why won't you let me save them?" she demanded, her tone rough and accusing as she tried again to shrug out of the guard's grip. "What right do you have to condemn them to die?"
Cheri's expression softened, but her eyes still held their resolve. "I won't allow it - it wouldn't be right. This is not your destiny."
Gisela's eyes narrowed...how dare Cheri deny her choice, the choice she had made in honor of her dearest friend? Who was she to speak of right and wrong; the very person who would let dozens die uselessly? "How would you know?" Gisela shouted. "Your destiny is to bring pain and death, and so you believe you are justified to keep me from mine?"
"I can't let you do this. I'm sorry," Cheri said softy, not averting her eyes in spite of the sadness in her voice.
"Sorry?" Gisela said contemptuously through gritted teeth. "If you were sorry, you'd let me go! You owe it to Julia!"
Cheri's eyes flickered with pain, but she did not relent. "The only thing I owe Julia is to save your life."
Gisela swallowed hard, her throat burning with shame as she realized that she had failed Julia yet again. She glared at Cheri, wanting so badly to hate her for this...for making Gisela believe in her and then letting her down. She wanted to hate Cheri for being able to stand there and look so regal and beautiful as she denied Gisela her right to honor Julia as she saw fit. She wanted to hate that pain in Cheri's eyes that she knew was for her.
She couldn't hate Cheri, though, no matter how she tried. So instead Gisela shoved the man who held her, twisting out of his grip, and then she rushed over to the bedside of the man with the worst injuries. She concentrated on helping him with her powers, trying not to let her anger interfere with her duty and trying not to notice as Cheri closed the door behind her as she left.
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Most of the human soldiers had died in Gisela's infirmary, some of them as her hands were hovering over their wounds, lit with healing power. In the end, she was useless. They had slipped though her fingers, one after the other - it had filled her with seething anger at first, but soon it faded. By the time the few survivors had been stabilized, all Gisela felt was numbness. So she had washed the blood from her hands and sought the only refuge she could think of...but even here, sitting before Julia's final resting place, she felt no peace. She had thought to explain and then thought to apologize, but in the end she had just sat there, waiting, not even knowing what it was she was seeking anymore.
Gisela wasn't surprised when she heard a slight rustling in the brush behind her. She pretended not to hear the tentative steps of her visitor and continued picking off the twigs and fallen leaves that were littering Julia's headstone. The footsteps came to a stop just behind her, and of course she knew who it was without turning. She had known that Cheri would probably come looking for her here, but she'd had to come anyway.
"Why did you stop me?" Gisela asked as she fingered some of the fresh flowers that rested on the ground before the headstone that bore only Julia's name - it was simple but beautiful, just as Julia would have wanted it.
Cheri knelt beside Gisela and placed a small bundle of blue flowers on top of the rest. "Because you were going to throw your life away." Cheri's voice was so gentle; she made it seem so reasonable. What was it about the way Cheri spoke and moved and smiled that made Gisela question herself?
Gisela stared straight ahead, not daring to look at Cheri. "At least it would have saved them! It would have been better than doing nothing…I could have helped them all." Those words felt empty now, meaningless, as if she were too exhausted to feel how she knew she should feel.
"Giving up your life won't bring her back, Gisela."
"I know that!" she insisted, her fists clenching in frustration. "But at least it would have been something…something I could do to honor her."
Cheri gave a resigned sigh. "I understand how you feel, but…"
Gisela scoffed. "How could you understand? You, of all people…the one who…"
"The one who killed her?"
For a second, Gisela was certain that she'd heard wrong - how could Cheri have just said it, spoken those words so easily even when her voice was full of pain? The shock lasted only a fleeting moment, and as Cheri's words sunk in Gisela felt a twinge of shame for disregarding Cheri's feelings. "I didn't say that," she said softly; it was the closest to an apology that she could come.
Cheri sighed. "You didn't have to. I said it to myself often enough to not need anyone else to say it for me." She paused briefly, and Gisela could feel Cheri's green eyes on her, but she stared straight ahead.
"I know how it feels to be powerless," Cheri continued, "I felt it when I watched Conrart ride off to Rutenburg; I felt it when Ulrike told me that it was Shinou's will that I become the Maou; and I feel it now, as I sit before Julia's grave knowing that I cannot help her dearest friend to overcome her grief. But even faced with that, I am able to find solace in knowing that even though I cannot change the past, I am able to act for the future."
Gisela wasn't sure what response she should give, but she didn't get the chance to give one. Slim arms wrapped around her shoulders and a warm body pressed against her from behind, and for a moment she couldn't breathe.
"The best way to honor Julia is by being true to yourself," Cheri said, her breath whispering against Gisela's ear as she spoke. "That is the most important gift you can give her. There is so much strength inside you, Gisela...you just have to open yourself up to finding it."
As Cheri held her, Gisela didn't know what to think. Cheri's embrace was sheltering and comfortable...too comfortable. Where did Cheri find all this strength, so much of it that her very touch made Gisela feel more alive than she'd felt in months? Was it out of desperation to feel some piece of that strength that Gisela wished this embrace would never end?
"How can I do that?" she asked quietly, somehow not feeling weak in asking that of Cheri. It was the first time she hadn't felt weak in months.
The arms around her tightened a bit. "The power inside yourself can be found in some very unique places." Gisela could hear the half-smile in Cheri's voice.
"What does that mean?"
Cheri's arms slipped away from her, and Gisela couldn't help but feel a hint of regret as the warmth against her back was suddenly gone. When Cheri spoke again, the playful tone in her voice had returned. "Meet me in the throne room tomorrow after your morning training, and I'll show you."
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The throne room was empty when Gisela got there. She was actually glad that she'd have a moment to collect herself, because she had been embarrassingly on edge since yesterday when Cheri had left her - whether out of anticipation or nervousness, she couldn't say. But she had never completed her morning training so quickly.
It didn't take more than a few seconds before one of the doors to the throne room swung open, and Cheri walked out.
"Good morning, my dear!" Cheri said brightly. She walked out into the light of the throne room, her strides purposeful and confident.
Gisela nearly choked...Cheri was wearing an outfit that could only be described as suitable for a dominatrix-turned-superhero. What little there was of the clothing was made of tight red leather, but it was designed so that one paid much more attention to the areas that were left bare. The cape and mask she wore somehow managed to seem bold and dynamic rather than garish, and the thigh-high red boots gave her an air of both playful whimsy and unwavering authority. Cheri looked less like a queen than Gisela could ever remember seeing her...and at the same time, so proud and magnificent that she practically glowed.
Gisela knew that her mouth must be hanging open in a thoroughly undignified manner, but she couldn't help it. "What…is that?" she asked incredulously, trying to decide whether to burst out laughing or start fanning her face to stop a blush from forming. Only Cheri could wear something that ridiculous and still manage to have some credibility.
"My dear, this is what all the well-dressed heroines are wearing these days. It's Anissina's design. I rather like it…it helps strike fear into the hearts of evildoers," Cheri said, giving her whip a twirl as if to emphasize her point.
"If I had to guess just what feeling that outfit strikes into the hearts of evildoers," Gisela said as she eyed Cheri up and down, "fear wouldn't be my first pick." Ridiculous or not, though, Gisela could hardly deny that Cheri looked incredible in it. It wasn't just how the material clung to Cheri's every curve or how the leather stretched across her breasts when she breathed or the way the contrast of the red leather against her creamy skin made it look so soft. What made Cheri so mesmerizing in that moment was the way her eyes flickered with vitality through the mask and the way her lip curled into a confident smile...what made her so beautiful wasn't the clothing she wore, but the way she radiated with strength and spirit and life.
Cheri beamed at the comment. "I'm so glad you approve! Having to save the world is absolutely no excuse for not looking fabulous."
Gisela shook her head, but couldn't help smiling warmly. "Only you could say that and actually have it seem to make sense."
Make sense...that was what was so strange. Cheri in this outfit made sense in a way that Gisela wouldn't have thought possible. Of course she could wear something like this and still look beautiful rather than laughable and strong rather than absurd - that was Cheri being herself.
"It's all part of the allure, darling," Cheri said brightly.
Indeed, it was; Cheri was so alluring because she could do something so seemingly crazy, paying no mind to convention or judgment or anything else but what she knew was right for her. She was able to shine because she followed her heart no matter what, putting aside everything else.
Once again, Gisela felt humbled in Cheri's presence. She wished that she were able to unflinchingly follow her own path like Cheri did, to be able to accept herself without any doubt and embrace who she was and make no apologies to anyone. To have that much faith in herself...
Faith. Having faith is as easy as you allow it to be. Julia had said that. As the memory of Julia's warm smile flashed in her mind, Gisela also heard Cheri's voice, smooth and flowing and filled with feeling.
There is so much strength inside you, Gisela...you just have to open yourself up to finding it.
Was it really so simple? Could the answer she had been seeking all this time have been eluding her because in order to find it, she need only stop searching? Could strength and faith be obtained just by believing that you had them?
Standing in Cheri's vibrant presence in that moment with Julia's and Cheri's words ringing in her ears, Gisela was, for the first time in a long time, able to believe that she was strong enough. She might not be lively and radiant like Cheri and she might not be calm and tranquil like Julia, but Gisela knew now that she was strong enough. Her strength was her resolve and her passion and her dedication - they weren't the same strengths as Julia's, but that was okay...they were hers. Her strength was different, but that did not make it less.
She was strong enough. And she would prove it.
"Gisela?" Cheri asked, her smile fading and her eyes filled with concern.
Part of Gisela thought that she should smile and thank Cheri for showing her what she needed to do - but no, that wasn't right. The best way she could show her thanks was by showing her strength. She would show Cheri - and everyone else - that she wasn't afraid to be herself, and that she wasn't afraid to take what she wanted.
This was going to be fun.
"Sit down, on your throne...now," Gisela ordered, her voice hard and unrelenting. She felt a little thrill go through her as she saw Cheri's eyes widen in shock at the sternness in her tone.
Cheri brief look of shock faded quickly, and her cheeky smile returned. "You're giving me orders? Have you forgotten that I'm the one holding the whip?" Cheri asked, her voice brimming with amusement.
Gisela put her hands on her hips and narrowed her eyes in a manner that she somehow knew made her look deadly serious. "I said," she growled in a deep voice, "sit down."
Cheri stood silent for a short moment, her mouth frozen in a small expression of surprise. But then her smile slowly returned and her eyes lit with understanding. "Yes, ma'am," Cheri said, her smile widening. She considered for a moment, and then added, "Or should I say, 'Yes sir, Sergeant von Kleist'?" Cheri chirped in mock offense, giving a flimsy solute and grinning all the while. She strode to her throne and took her seat, her back barely bending as she did so…just like royalty should.
Cheri was about to be usurped while seated on her own throne.
As Gisela took several slow, predatory steps toward where Cheri now sat, she realized that she couldn't remember the last time she felt so amazingly good. A smirk formed on her face as she advanced on Cheri, and she could practically feel the roguish glint in her eyes as she stared unflinchingly at the Maou, letting Cheri know that it was not she who was in control, here. It was exhilarating.
Gisela stood before Cheri and placed her hooked index finger beneath Cheri's chin, elevating her gaze so that their eyes met - exactly as Cheri had done to her days ago. Cheri's green eyes were smiling even as her full, red-painted lips formed an innocent pout.
"And what, exactly, are you planning to do?" Cheri asked, her voice soft yet full of anticipation.
Had Cheri been wearing a crown, Gisela would have plucked it right off of her head. As a substitute, Gisela closed her thumb and index finger around the corner of Cheri's mask and slid it off of her, slowly, before setting it down on the wide armrest of Cheri's throne. "I haven't exactly decided," Gisela said with a casual grin. "But when I do, I don't expect that you'll have to ask."
Gisela ran her thumb over Cheri's lips, pleased when Cheri's mouth pursed a bit in an almost-kiss and Cheri's cheeks took on a becoming pink hue. She had never done anything like this: so impulsive, so confident, so daring. It struck her how this was utterly unlike anything Julia would ever do...but that, Gisela decided, was just fine. There was something within herself that longed for this feeling, urged her to grab a hold of it and never let go. It was amazing how gratifying that felt; how much easier it was to embrace this feeling than to suppress it in favor of what she had thought people wanted her to be.
Gisela's fingers brushed Cheri's chin and then her cheek as they moved along the curves of her face, and then weaved into her soft hair. Cheri leaned her head back obediently as Gisela stroked her hair and moved forward to until she was sitting on Cheri's lap, sitting astride Cheri's hips as she knelt on the throne. She moved against Cheri, sliding closer until they were pressed against one another fully. Puffs of breath tickled Gisela's neck as she pressed herself against Cheri, able to feel every soft curve even through the thick leather.
A tug on the cord around Cheri's neck loosened her cape and let it fall into a pile behind Cheri. A similar tug on Gisela's braid unwound the tie and fingers trailed through her hair, loosening the tightly wound braid and letting Gisela's hair fall in a thick curtain around her. Cheri's fingers moved through Gisela's hair and caressed the back of her neck as Gisela leaned forward to brush her lips lightly against Cheri's jaw. Gisela's free hand trailed up Cheri's side and to her collarbone, and she peeled back some of the tight leather to reveal the skin of Cheri's shoulder. The strap of a black bra was visible - how like Cheri to wear black lingerie.
Cheri shivered as Gisela leaned down to taste the skin of Cheri's shoulder. She worked her way across Cheri's collarbone and then to her neck, alternating soft kisses with flicks of her tongue. Cheri gasped as Gisela ran her tongue along the shell of her ear and then closed her lips around the earlobe. "You should employ this strategy with your healers. It's hard to argue with," Cheri said breathily.
There was a small popping sound as Gisela's lips slid off of Cheri's ear, and she pulled back to give Cheri a stern look. "Cheri?" she asked, more as a command than a question.
"Yes?" Cheri asked, her playful tone carrying no small amount of anticipation.
Gisela leaned in, bringing her lips so close to Cheri's that they nearly touched. "Shut up."
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Günter stood in one of the throne room's many doorways, his jaw hanging open in shock and the stack of documents in his arms utterly forgotten. He was all too used to catching Lady Cheri in less-then-dignified positions - she often orchestrated it that way, after all - but he had never imagined that he might one day find his own daughter engaged in said inappropriate acts with the Maou, let alone on the sacred throne once occupied by Shinou himself!
A low moan resounded throughout the throne room, the marble floors and high ceilings making the sound echo and amplify. Günter swallowed nervously and reached over to shut the door, trying to pretend that he didn't notice the way that Gisela slid her hand beneath the fabric of Lady Cheri's bodice at the neckline. The outfit had looked far too snug for a hand to possibly fit - but Günter desperately tried not to think about it. And he didn't even want to know what the whip was intended for.
Günter shifted the documents in his arms as he walked down the corridor, a small smile forming on his face as the surprise wore off. It seemed that Lady Cheri had quite an impact on Gisela - much the same one he'd expected her to have, really. He should, as a concerned parent, probably be more uncomfortable with the idea than he was, but how could he, when Gisela had a spark in her eyes for the first time in months?
When, a few weeks later, Günter heard rumors of a gorgeous blonde in a red suit who was a champion of wrongly treated women everywhere, he wasn't all that surprised. Nor was he surprised to see that since Gisela had been given the nickname "sergeant," the healers were far more diligent in their duties. They were honoring themselves for who they were, and not pretending to be anything different – that was their tribute to Julia.
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When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid. -Audre Lorde
I'm afraid I cannot take credit for these two adorably snarky lines. They are property of Mark MacKinnon, amazing author of On a Clear Day You Can See Forever. Quoted with permission from the author.
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Comments and concrit are appreciated. Thanks!
